Saving My Submission BN (28 page)

“You feel guilty about it, don’t you?”

“I did.” He nodded. “But not anymore. Veronica
wouldn’t want me putting a tourniquet on my Dominance. She’d want me living it
fully. I do, too. I want it with you… all of it with you. Not just a few days.
Not a week here or there. I want to be the Dominant part of your life—in every
sense of the word.”

Gripped by his profound declaration, no tendrils of
fear or a sinister panic assaulted. Before I could second guess my timing, I
turned toward Joshua and inhaled a steady breath.

“I’ve decided to move to Chicago.”

Snapping his head my direction, he blinked. “Just like
that?”

I giggled. “Yes. God, I’m either a fool or I’ve lost
my mind, but yes. I’ve tried to convince myself that this thing… this
connection we share would never last. I still don’t know if it will, but when I
was in England, all I could think about was coming back to you. I couldn’t
erase you from my mind. It was even hard for me to totally focus on work. It’s
never been like that before. I’m tired of fighting this crazy wire that runs
between us.”

This time he was the one who drew my hand to
his
lips.

“So would it freak you out completely if I told you
I’ve fallen pretty hard for you?”

My heart literally skipped a beat. “I… ah… yes.”

“Fair enough. I’ll save that for a later
conversation.” He shrugged with a wolfish grin.

“Good idea,” I mumbled, then swallowed tightly.

Several silent minutes passed as Joshua’s claim
swirled through my head like a tornado. I cared for him deeply, but was it
love? I’d never been in love with someone before. Infatuated, yes… but it
usually wore off in a few days. Days, hell, weeks had passed and it still
hadn’t worn off with Joshua. Time would tell.

Reaching Albuquerque a little past midnight, Joshua
pulled into a resort. When we checked in, he requested the penthouse suite. Too
exhausted to squabble over his extravagant choice, I wasn’t going to argue if
he wanted to pamper me.

After ordering champagne and strawberries from room
service, Joshua filled the massive spa tub. Slowly stripping me bare, he kissed
my shoulders, neck and breasts before clutching me to his hard body and
claiming my mouth. His forceful control made my head swim and my heart soar.
Mentally and physically wiped out, I held onto him, grateful he’d been the one
by my side through the most
craptastic
and
magnificent day of my life. While I had no desire to re-live the terror Davis
Walker orchestrated, I’d take Joshua opening up and sharing pieces of his heart
with me any day.

Joshua led me to the tub. Easing down into the
swirling hot water I watched him unbutton his shirt and peel it off. Dropping
my gaze, I stared at his taut, lean muscles, the wiry blonde hair between his
flat brown nipples, and his washboard abs. My mind filled with memories of the
perfection I found beneath his powerful body. It was as if I’d waited a
lifetime for the man, and in many ways I had.

“Please,” I whispered boldly.

“What is it you want?”

“To touch you,” I murmured as he knelt by the side of
the tub.

A broad smile adorned his face. “Is that all you
want?”

“For starters,” I purred as I raked my nails through
the hair on his chest before flattening my palm against his hot flesh.

Leaning in, I rested my head on his shoulder before
pressing my lips to his skin. I licked at his salty flesh as I skimmed a hand
up to cup his nape.

“Get in with me,” I murmured.

His body shook softly in a silent chuckle. “Giving
orders, are we?”

“No, Sir. I…”

“I’m teasing you, girl. I’m waiting on room service.
They should be here any minute.”

“Call them back, tell them to either hurry up or
forget it,” I replied with a playful pout.

“Didn’t I teach you a lesson about patience at
dinner?”

“Yes, but three weeks without you felt like three
years.”

There was a loud knock on the door.

“I’ll be right back.” Joshua grinned.

Moments later he returned carrying a tray of plump
ripe strawberries and a bottle of champagne chilling in a shimmering silver
clawed bucket. I smiled as I watched him pop the cork, pour two glasses then
set the plate of strawberries on the ledge at the back of the tub.

Sliding the leather belt from its buckle, Joshua toed
off his shoes and socks then released his zipper. His hard and ready cock
sprang free.
Finally the wait was almost over.

Hurry. Hurry.

Picking up his champagne in one hand, he fisted his
thick erection with the other, edging closer to the side of the tub. As he
stepped in, I eased back to give him room. Instead of joining me, he stepped
in, then sat down on the edge. Eye-level with his turgid cock, I licked my
lips, antsy and impatient for his command.

Lowering the glass to my lips, he smiled. “Take a big
sip but don’t swallow. Hold it to the back of your throat.”

Filling my mouth with the fizzing liquid, I tilted my
head back as he instructed and parted my lips.

“Good girl.”

A spark of satisfaction burned in my core as he
circled the slick crest around my lips. Gazing into my eyes, he pressed inside
my mouth, and I wrapped around him. Tickling cold bubbles surrounding his hot
flesh and when I swirled my tongue around him, Joshua let out a hiss of
pleasure.

Setting the glass aside, he wrapped his fingers in my
hair and clenched. The sting from my scalp raced down my spine, gathering over
my clit.

Guiding my mouth up and down, I slid my tongue over
the sensitive spot beneath the crest. He sucked in a gasp, issued a hoarse
curse, and kept right on pushing my head up and down over his velvety steel.
Pleasure played across his face and filled me with satisfaction that I could
bring him such exquisite sensations. Filling my mouth over and again with both
champagne and his cock, I basked in his guttural noises and rumbles of
pleasure, but best of all were his raspy praises.

Sliding into the tub alongside me, he reached up and
plucked a ripe strawberry. Pinching off the stem, he tapped the tapered end
upon my lips. When I opened my mouth, he placed the fruit between my teeth then
dipped his head, biting into it as he pressed his lips over mine. Tart, sweet juice
exploded over my tongue as we feasted on the berry, sucking and slurping before
he eased his body over mine. Surging inside me with a savage thrust, he skimmed
his hands over my wet flesh, pinching, and plucking my nipples as he swallowed
my cries of pleasure. In an achingly slow rhythm, he thrust deep and dragged
out, stretching me tight and full. The blissful burn spreading over my swollen
lips was the sweetest agony in the world.

“I missed you. Missed the way my body responds to you
like this. Missed the feel of your touch, your scent… the way you scorch me to
the bone,” I gasped, freely conveying all the feeling within.

“Yes,” he hissed. Arching his hips, he ground his
crest over my g-spot. “Beg me to use you again, little one.”

Staring at me expectantly, he wanted me to summon the
beast. I searched for some glimmer of guarantee that it wouldn’t turn out like
before, that his demons wouldn’t resurface and drive a wedge between us again.
After the rollercoaster events of the past twenty-four hours, I didn’t think
I’d be able to handle the magnitude he sought me to stir.

“Joshua…”

“It’s okay, baby. I have to prove to you that it’ll be
all right. Tell me, girl, do you want to please me?” He nodded.

Reaching up, I stroked his face and slowly shook my
head. “No,” I murmured. His expression fell, dejected and lined with regret;
I’d disarmed him with my reply. Drawing my thumb over his soft lips, I gazed at
him, penetrating past his gloom. “I
need
to please you, Master. Take me wildly. Don’t hold back. I ache to bring you
joy.”

His brows furrowed and his eyes narrowed as his
nostrils flared. Yes, I’d poked the sleeping lion inside. Arching my hips to
meet his, I urged him to unleash the beast and set it free.

“Again, little one,” he demanded in a raspy, hungry
whisper.

“Take me. Mark me. Own me, Master. Please,” I purred.

An animalistic groan rumbled from deep in his chest.
Joshua gripped my hips and hammered into my gripping cunt in an unrelenting
frenzy. Water splashed between us, sloshing up and over the tub. Bending his
head, Joshua sank his teeth into the tops of my breasts, biting and gnawing,
marking me. Angry red welts dotted my alabaster flesh as he slammed into me,
savage and untamed. My surrender soared, spellbound by his driving command.

“Who do you belong to?” he demanded.

“You, Master. I’m yours… all yours,” I panted, bucking
against his driving shaft.

His chest expanded and a wild cry tore from his lips.
Yanking me off his cock, Joshua jerked me out of the tub and hauled me to the
sink. Dripping wet, he bent me over the vanity as he gripped my hair and pulled
my head back in front of the mirror.

“Look at yourself, Mellie,” he ordered as he spread my
ass cheeks apart and slammed inside my cunt, claiming both my reflection and
me. “Look how fucking gorgeous you are.”

I slid a gaze over my lurching body, my breasts
swaying with each driving thrust. My hard, cranberry-colored nipples were drawn
up, wrinkled and hard. The outline of his teeth had branded into bright red
welts and my face glowed in a flushed red hue. Staring into my eyes, I peered
past the hunger and lust, catching sight of the woman that yearned for freedom,
within. She was stunning, peaceful and serene.

“You can finally see her, can’t you? Look at that
striking submissive you had trapped inside you. She’s mine, now. All mine,
isn’t she, little one?”

“Yes,” I moaned.

“Yes,” he echoed. Scraping his teeth along my
shoulder, he swiped his tongue up the column of my neck. Wrapping his lips
around my ear lobe, he tugged and nipped. “I’m dying to claim all of her… her
joys, her sorrows, her fears… triumphs and failures. Is that what you want me
to do, girl?”
 

“Yes, Master. Yes.”

Joshua hissed as he skimmed a palm between my shoulder
blades, pressing me down upon the cool marble. Held hostage to his gaze in the
mirror, he withdrew from inside me, keeping the crown of his cock nestled
between my burning folds. His eyes narrowed and his jaw ticked.

“You. Are. Mine. All of you. Mind. Body. Heart. Soul.
Everything you are. Everything you’ll ever be. Is. Mine.” Snarling through
clenched teeth, Joshua emphasized each vow with an arduous thrust.

Tears spilled from my eyes. My soul felt like it was
disintegrating while yet morphing into someone or something else, tranquil and
restored.

“Yours,” I affirmed with a cry.

Sliding his finger to my pussy, Joshua strummed my
throbbing clit, unraveling the thread of control I’d been clinging to.
Clenching around his demanding thrusts, I tried to hold tight as the arcs of
release spread through my limbs and up my spine.

Slamming himself to the hilt, Joshua stilled, seated
inside me. I felt his cock jerk as he groaned out a command for me to ‘come’.
Milliseconds before I shattered, I watched him suck in a gasp, felt his cock
pulse, and as he begin to fill me as he let out a deafening roar.

A scream of deliverance ripped from my throat, fused
with his and echoed in my ears. Leaning over me, Joshua sank his teeth into my
shoulder, pinning me to the marble surface as he spilled inside my
spasming
core.

My legs felt like wet noodles, and I gripped the
countertop for support while Joshua dried my shivering body. His reverent
touch—the total dichotomy of the beastly way he’d claimed me—warmed my heart
and moved me deeply.

“You’re utterly amazing, little one,” he praised as he
wrapped a dry towel around me. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“No, Master. It was perfect,” I whispered on a dreamy
sigh.

Approval and pride lit up his face as a smile played
over his lips.

Drying himself off, we made our way through the
sitting room and into the bedroom. Staring at the inviting bed, I all but
drooled. Spent and ready for sleep, I dropped the towel and started to pull
back the covers.

“Stop,” Joshua issued in a firm command. “Kneel.”

Dropping the fabric, I frowned and turned to stare at him.
Joshua cocked his head and shot me a look warning it wouldn’t be wise to
challenge him. With a wistful glance at the bed, I knelt at his feet, lowering
my head and eyes to the floor. Waiting several long seconds, Joshua finally sat
down on the edge of the bed.

“Look at me.”

Raising my chin, I slid a gaze over his naked body
before linking with his beautiful eyes. Power, satisfaction, and passion
reflected there. A tiny smile tugged at my lips.

“We have some unfinished business to discuss, little
one.”

Still riding the lingering sparks of bliss, my brain
couldn’t find the path he was on. Drawing a blank, I issued a slight shake of
my head and gently shrugged my shoulder.

“What were the last words you said to me on the phone
in the UK?”

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Shit
. He wanted
to discuss that now? After the mind-blowing exchange we just had? Why did he
want to rehash my ugly behavior now? Couldn’t he wait and make me grovel in the
morning?

Joshua chuckled. “You’re as easy to read as a novel,
sweet girl. Yes. We’re going to discuss this now… then you can sleep.”

I squared my shoulders and nodded. “I meant it when I
told you before that I was sorry for being so rude and hanging up on you. I
don’t know what more I can say other than I’ll never do it again.”

“No, you won’t, because I won’t tolerate it.” His even
tone didn’t hold a drop of anger or disappointment. “I denied your orgasm for a
reason, but you chose not to accept it. Instead, you slammed up your walls and
pushed me away, refusing to accept my Dominance.”

“I know. I’m sorry, Sir.”

“You now owe me two punishments, little one.”

“Two?” I blinked. “So you’re not going to accept my
apology?”

“Oh no, I accept your apology wholeheartedly. The
problem I have is that you didn’t communicate with me—well, that and calling me
a son of a bitch and hanging up on me. I didn’t like that very much, either.”

“I supposed asking for a postponement of my sentence
to get some sleep is out of the question?”

“Absolutely.” He smirked then patted his lap. “Climb
up here and lay across my lap. Let’s get this over with, so we can both put
this behind us and get some sleep.”

Joshua’s lackadaisical tone confused me. It lacked a
level of disappointment, and felt passive in a weird way. Where was the anger…
the censure? Punishment was supposed to come with a heavy dose of guilt, a need
to make amends for displeasing the Dom. The way Joshua presented it felt almost
as undeserving as the spankings I took at Genesis.

When I didn’t move, Joshua silently shifted on the bed,
watching me closely.

“Do you need to hear that I’m not pleased with you?
That I’m annoyed by your lack of respect and that I am disappointed in you?”
Using that damn potent Dom voice, dripping with scorn, he narrowed his eyes.

Bingo.
Yes, it
was exactly what I needed, because almost instantly a black oily sludge raced
through my veins. Contrite and suffused in rejection, I rose from the floor,
and positioned myself over his knees.

“I’m sorry, Master,” I whispered heartily as I glanced
at him over my shoulder.

Joshua leaned over and kissed my cheek. “I know you
are, because you’re willing to prove it to me, little one.”

Straightening, he drew his hand into the air. I
dropped my head. Clenching my eyes and squeezing my butt cheeks together, I
waited for the pain.

He landed his hand with a stinging slap.

“Ouch,” I groused. “That hurts.”

Joshua chuckled. “Yes, it’s supposed to. That’s why
it’s called punishment.”

“How many of these do I have to take?” I hissed.

“As many as I think you need. Stop complaining and
count for me, girl.”

Turning up the volume on his Dominant edict, a shiver
rippled through me as he slapped my ass again, harder.

“Two,” I yelped.

“No, that’s one, sweetheart.”

“But you already—”

“I can start from the beginning again if that’s what
you’d like?”

“One,” I shouted.

Somewhere between swat fourteen or fifteen I’d sailed
away. The whispers passing over my lips ceased to be numbers; instead they’d
faded into moans and whimpers. With Joshua’s strong arm banded around my waist
and a decadent fire melting through my tissue, I lost myself in a buoyant void
of peace.

I realized the spankings had stopped, replaced by the
gentle caress of his hand over my blazing backside. I didn’t know how long he’d
held me before moving me onto the mattress; time had lost all meaning. Cold
sheets fluttered over my skin, followed by his long, lean body pressed against
my chest. I could feel the reverberation of his voice, as he threaded his
fingers through my hair, but couldn’t link meaning to his words; the synapses in
my brain were fried. But I felt the approval in his tone, and that filled my
heart with joy as the darkness carried me away.

The feel of waking in his arms was perfection, and a
soft smile curled my lips as I snuggled closer. With my ear pressed to his chest
I listened to the strong, steady rhythm of his heartbeat and for a few blissful
minutes, forgot all about Davis, his threats, and our friends waiting at the
cabin.

The sound of Joshua’s cell phone ringing from far away
in the suite broke my bliss. Remembering we’d abandoned our clothes in the
bathroom the night before, I shifted to go get it, but Joshua cinched me
tighter, refusing to let me move.

“Let it go. If it’s important they’ll call back,” he
murmured. His eyes stayed closed and his face lax, as it had been in sleep.

“
Mmm
,” I purred. “Marvelous
idea.”

Peeking up at him, he opened one eye and smiled. “I
could get used to this.”

“So could I.”

“Oh really?” He asked, as both eyes popped open in
surprise. “What happened to the
monoga
-phobic woman I
knew a few short weeks ago?”

“
You
happened to
her.”

“Works every time,” he smirked.

“Ah,” I gasped, mocking insult. “So that makes me
what… Another notch in your bedpost? Another nameless, faceless woman used to
stroke your ego?”

“It’s not my ego I like you stroking, little one. And
you’re certainly not a notch in my bedpost. You’re mine, and I’m keeping you.
Deal with it,” he replied with a mock scowl.

“
Hrmm
,” I pouted. “You make
me feel like I’m a stray dog you want to take home.”

“No, I’m not into puppy play, little one. Are you?”

“No! I like the way you make me pant, but I refuse to
bark.”

“I’ll not make you bark, but I sure had you howling
last night when I spanked your ass,” he laughed. “Speaking of which, how’s it
feeling this morning? Sore?”

“I haven’t rolled over yet. I’m afraid to.”

A mischievous smile curled on his lips before he
repositioned himself, tugging me beneath him. The warm sheet chaffed my tender
tissue, but when he settled his strong body over mine and his thick cock nudged
my pussy, the discomfort vanished.

“How about now?” he whispered as he dipped his head
and kissed my neck.

“Now works for me,” I purred spreading my legs open.

Joshua laughed, nipping his teeth upon my pulse point.
“Minx. I was talking about your ass.”

“You can have that whenever you want it, too, Master,”
I moaned.

Sliding my lips over his chest, I left a trail of soft
kisses as I cupped his ass and ground my tingling pussy against his cock.
Wedging a knee between my legs, Joshua spread me open farther before gripping his
cock and aligning it against my opening. Just as he lifted his hips to slide
inside me, his phone started to ring again.

“Fuck. Don’t move,” he muttered as he climbed off me
and sprinted toward the bathroom.

Seconds later he swaggered back in, phone pressed to
his ear, and his hard erection all but begging for my lips. Even though he told
me not to move, I couldn’t resist toying with him. Sliding from the bed, I
dropped to my knees, flashed him a devilish grin and opened my mouth.

Joshua narrowed his eyes and shot me an angry glare.
Fisting his cock he stepped in front of me, inching closer and closer to my
waiting lips. As I leaned forward to gobble him up, he swayed back and shook
his head. Dammit, he was going to make me sit and suffer, and wait for permission.
I issued an inward growl.

“That’s no problem. Send it to me, and I’ll have her
take a look.”

I didn’t know whom he was talking to, and at that
particular moment I didn’t care. Rocking side to side on my knees, massaging my
clit between my weeping folds, I stared at the clear bead of pre-come growing
on his cock. Parting my lips, I slid my tongue over my bottom lip with a
seductive tease.

“Sure, of course. I’ll call you back with an answer.”

His voice remained calm, but the sinful expression
lining his face spoke volumes. Joshua’s self-restraint was cracking beneath my
brazen enticement. Drawing his lips together in a tight, angry line, he slapped
his cock against my lips, sending the bead of pre-come landing on the tip of my
nose. With an impish grin I gathered it up with my finger and slid it over my
tongue. Moaning softly, I closed my eyes and savored the taste.

“You too. I’ll be in touch soon.”

He didn’t even say good-bye. Joshua simply ended the
call, tossed his phone to the bed, then crossed his arms. He glared down at me,
his nostrils flaring. “I have a belt, and I’m itching to use it on you, girl.”

“I’m sorry, Sir, it’s just… I couldn’t help myself.
You came back in the room all nice and hard… looking so damn sexy. I caved. A
girl can only take so much temptation.” I bit my lips together to stifle a
grin.

“So this is how it’s going to be? You, constantly
topping from the bottom, and trying to usurp my authority every chance you
get?”

There it was… that harsh tone of disapproval. The
smile fell from my face and I shook my head. “No, Sir. I was just having fun. I
didn’t mean to upset you.”

“I’m not upset. I’m disappointed. Your spirit is
unique, Mellie, and I never want you to lose it, but I specifically told you
not to move. We’re not going to get very far if you insist on challenging me
every step of the way, girl.”

“I know, Sir. I’m sorry.”

Inundated with remorse, I issued a heavy sigh. Joshua
reached down and cupped my chin. Tilting my head back, he stared into my eyes
as he brushed his thumb over my lips. A ghost of a smile tugged his lips, and
his expression softened.

“You’re not to beat yourself up over this, sweetheart.
I’m simply setting ground rules, but I think I just found the key to unlock
that gorgeous submissive inside you.”

I couldn’t help but notice the gleam of delight
dancing in his eyes. Still, it didn’t erase the guilt lingering within or the
worry of repercussions to come.

“That was Pruett on the phone. He’s sent over the
surveillance footage from your neighbor. He wants you to look at it and ID
Walker. Come on, hop up on the bed.”

“Okay,” I replied softly.

Helping me off the floor, Joshua snatched up his phone
then sat next to me on the bed as he opened up the mail program. Staring at the
screen, we watched a tall heavy-set man in dark clothing, sunglasses, and a
baseball cap exit a black sedan. Giving a conspiratorial glance over his
shoulder, the camera caught a surprisingly clear view of his face.

“What the…” I whispered. “That’s not Davis.”

“No. It’s not. Who is he, Mellie?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never seen that guy before in my
life. Can you go back and pause or something?”

“Sure.” Joshua rewound the video, stopping the feed
and enlarging the image.

Staring at the man’s round, fat cheeks and a bulbous
nose, I shook my head. He looked nothing at all like Davis Walker. “I don’t
know who that man is. Why is he stalking me?”

“You’re sure? He’s not a disgruntled client or
something?”

“I’m positive. I’d eat the cost of a job and start
over before I’d let a client down.” Perplexed, I gazed at the stranger’s face,
racking my brain for even a hint of recollection. There was none.

“Maybe Walker hired this guy to do his bidding. Maybe
he didn’t want to get his hands dirty.”

“You mean like a hit man?” I choked.

“I don’t know. It’s not Walker, and you don’t
recognize this guy. I’m just trying to find some logic here. Where’s your
purse?”

“Over there, next to my suitcase.” I pointed across
the room. “Why?”

“I want to see if you have any new message,
sweetheart,” Joshua explained as he snagged my handbag before re-joining me on
the bed.

Even with all his hateful and threatening messages, I
never truly thought Davis Walker was crazy enough to follow through with any of
them. But now, the idea that he might have hired someone to do… god knows what
to me, a surge of fear, bigger than ever, careened through me.

“Joshua, I’m scared.”

Turning, he pinned me with a sympathetic yet
determined look. “No one is going to hurt you. Whoever this nut case is, he’s
going to have to kill me before he’ll get to you.”

Fear was lodged in my throat and I trembled, but I
managed to give him a resolute nod. Joshua leaned in and kissed me, then tugged
the blanket from the bed and wrapped it around me. Standing, he pulled a pair
of jeans from his suitcase and put them on. I numbly watched him as he turned
on my phone and started reading my texts. With an angry expression he flipped
the device off and tucked it back in my purse.

“What did he say?”

“Nothing much, spewing shit about some welcome home
torture he’s planning for us.” Joshua scrubbed a hand through his hair. “But
since we’re not going home, I’m glad we’ll disappoint the prick.”

I nodded mutely, questions and fears swirled in my
brain.

“Come on, baby. You’re still shaking. I’m going to
fill the tub for you, and I want you to try and relax while I make some more
calls, okay?”

“Will you stay in the bathroom with me?”

My quivering voice drew a look of alarm to settle over
Joshua’s face.

I couldn’t mask my fear. Riding a seesaw of one
emotional high one minute and bottoming out the next, my self-confidence felt
shredded. Stripped bare and made vulnerable by Walker’s masterful manipulation,
I feared he’d succeed in taking mine and Joshua’s lives and every ounce of
sanity before my torturous end.

With a slow, concerned nod, he took my hand and led me
to the bathroom.

Reclining in the hot bubbling water, my own
bewildering emotions frightened me almost as much as Davis’ threats. Grasping
for something resembling normalcy, I reached down deep to find strong, capable
Mellie beneath the sublime wings of my submission, but I couldn’t find her
anywhere. I was too mired in a worried sludge; even the warm water surrounding
me couldn’t wash it away.