Seductive Truths (Seductive Trilogy) (41 page)

    
‘
There’s more to this encounter than you’re making out to be, your body language says it all.
’

    
‘
My body language?  My body isn’t doing anything…
’

    
‘
You’re acting defensive for a start.
’
  She sighs and turns to gaze into her wine, frown marring her angelic features. 
‘
Listen Alex, I didn’t want to tell you this, you had so much on your mind as it was, what with your upcoming wedding and all, but, well, I think you deserve to know, especially in light of what occurred this afternoon.
’

     After taking a rather large mouthful of wine Maggie continues. 
‘
Two months ago I started to get this unsettling feeling as if someone was watching me every time I took Bethany to and from school and when I went shopping.  At first I thought nothing of it, but then that feeling intensified as each week went by.  However, when I looked around me no one was there.  No one was ever there.  I passed it off as nothing more than my imagination playing tricks on me. 

    
‘
Ever since Thomas’s death I feel unprotected.  I think it’s an unconscious thing on my part, what with not having a man constantly around and looking after Bethany.

    
‘
Over the last couple of weeks this unsettling feeling had diminished, until today that is.
’
  Maggie looks up making sure to capture my eye line. 
‘
I don’t think what you saw was a coincidence.  And I don’t think you’ve told me the truth.  You’ve uncovered something and for reasons that are your own, you’re unwilling to tell me.
’
 

    
Maggie, please stop!

    
‘
What’s going on Alex?  What is it you won’t tell me?
’

    
‘
Maggie, honestly…
’

    
‘
Please Alex don’t play me for a fool.
’
  She shifts a bit closer, trying to persuade me to convey my information. 
‘
From the moment you vanished you’ve been acting odd.  You disappear without a word for one thing is out of the norm.  You never just up and leave without informing someone, providing someway of contacting you if need be.  You would have had some sort of explanation, no matter how pathetic.  Just something to ease our minds, but there was nothing.  Nothing Alex!
’
 

    
‘
I told you why I left suddenly.  William and I…
’

    
‘
That’s just a load of bull and don’t you dare tell me otherwise.  What is going on with you?  You turn up out of blue looking dishevelled and like you hadn’t had a decent meal in
days.  And another thing!  Whenever William is mentioned your body stiffens and you look anywhere but at me.  It’s got more to do with him than you’re making out.  Why can’t you just tell me Alex?
’

     Seeing the hurt and pain behind her eyes I feel ashamed for lying to her.  My gut tells me no good will come out of telling her the truth, while on the other hand, my conscience wants me to ease the guilt and tell her all. 
She has the right to know,
it murmurs. 
Wouldn’t you want to know if you were in her place?

    
‘
Okay,
’
I sigh and lean towards her a bit.  My stomach revolts with what I am about to say, but I can’t see another way around it, can’t bear living a lie any more, there’s been enough of that already.  Too many lies and half-truths have been settling above us like fog across fields. 
‘
You deserve to know at least some of what has been going on, but for your and Bethany’s safety and peace of mind I can’t reveal all, not now, maybe not ever.  And you have to promise not to speak a word of it to anyone outside of this room.  But above all, you have to promise me that you will never,
ever
try and confront the persons involved.  My heart couldn’t take it if something were to happen to you, either of you.  You’re all I have in this world who I can truly trust.  So, do you promise me all this?
’
  Maggie’s eyes have grown wide and I hear the light tapping of her foot as the nervous
affliction
of hers kicks in.  When this first occurred in my presence I found it to be a rather humorous quirk of hers, but now it causes me agony to know I am behind her agitation. 

    
‘
Do you promise?
’
  I ask.

    
‘
But what if…
’

    
‘
Just promise me Maggie,
’
I enclose my hands around hers, tightly, begging. 
‘
Please, trust me.  That’s all I’m asking.
’

     She nods her head jerkily. 

    
‘
I need to hear you say it Maggie.  I need to hear the words.
’

    
‘
I-I promise Alex.  I swear on my life, on Bethany’s life, that I will not breathe a single word to another living soul or try to confront those involved.
’

    
‘
You have to stick by that vow.  It’s the only way I know you and Bethany will be safe.
’

    
‘
Safe!  You have got to be kidding me Alex!  Safe?  What have you got yourself into?  What have you got
us
involved in?  What’s going on Alex?
’

     Taking a deep breath and closing my eyes the dam finally breaks and the words just cascade out of my mouth without any real control. 

    
‘
Thomas’s death wasn’t a random act of hit and run.  The person driving the car could have easily avoided the incident, but they didn’t.  The driver knew exactly what they were doing.  Thomas saw something the driver didn’t want being known.  The driver’s aim wasn’t to drive around London as recklessly as he could.  His aim was to make sure Thomas never spoke a word, permanently.  My brother’s death was no accident.
’
  I take a breath to recoup before delivering the final blow and for this I know I have to look into her eyes.  I need her to believe me. 
‘
Thomas was murdered.
’

     Her face drains of colour and her hand starts to tremble, then out of the corner of my eye I see her glass of wine embark on a southward journey to the floor as her fingers turn numb and she loses grip.  Before it has chance to completely leave her hand I manage to take it away from her to place on the coffee table out of harm’s way.

    
‘
Mur-mur-murd-murdered?
’

     I’ve started I might as well finish. 

    
‘
You see, Thomas began to get suspicious…
’
and I reveal all I know and experienced throughout these last few weeks, leaving out nothing but the murderer’s identity and Gareth’s personal details along with my complex developing feelings towards him.  I still can’t explain them.  I don’t think I will ever be able to.

     During my monologue various emotions plague Maggie’s face.  She goes from confusion to understanding one second and fear to relief the next. 
I wonder what is going through her mind
. 

    
‘
…And there you have it.  Quite a variation from my lousy excuse of staying in a hotel wouldn’t you say?
’
I attempt to lighten the atmosphere.

    
‘
Quite,
’
she deadpans, my attempt obviously failing.

     The awkward silence falls like a curtain on a play.  Everything is hidden from viewers’ eyes, but they know activity still continues.  The things that must be going on in Maggie’s head, the many questions beginning to form, the explosion of emotions pulling her in all sorts of directions.  She must be feeling vulnerable.

     Even when I found out the truth I didn’t know what was better.  Knowing the fact my fiancé killed my brother or having carried on ignorant of the facts.  But it’s too late to ponder the
‘
what ifs
’
now.  Life still continues and you can’t change the past, all you can do is move on and learn from it.

    
‘
I take it you know who killed my husband?
’
she asks, eyes avoiding all contact with me.

    
How has it come to this?  She can’t bear the sight of me any longer.  I knew I shouldn’t have said anything.  Damn my irrefutable guilty conscience!

    
‘
Yes.
’

    
‘
And I take it you will not tell me?
’

    
‘
I can’t, for your own…
’

    
‘
Damn it Alex!
’
she expels as she leaps off of the sofa, looming down on me making me feel very small and insignificant.  It’s amazing how her tiny frame can appear so ferocious. 
‘
I have the right to know who killed my husband!
’

     God, never in my life have I seen her eyes burn with such a fiery passion before.  Maggie has always been the calm, collective and demure one.  She has never been one to raise her voice or to lash out in anger.  She has always managed to deal with difficult situations in some form of etiquette.  I don’t know how to deal with this Maggie.

    
‘
Maggie, honestly, if I could I would tell you,
’
I say, backing into the corner of the sofa. 
Stop being so pathetic Alex, it’s only Maggie!

    
‘
So what’s stopping you?
’

    
‘
Everything.
’

    
‘
That’s not an answer.
’

    
‘
It’s the best one I’ve got.
’
 

     Maggie opens her mouth as if to speak, but thinks better of it and it closes.  She turns her back on me to stare at the mantel piece instead.  I hear her sigh and her shoulders slump.  The tension rolls off of her back and to the floor.

    
‘
Do I know him?
’
she croaks, sounding tired and defeated.

    
‘
How do you know it was a him?
’

    
‘
Do I know him?
’
she asks again, this time with more authority.

    
‘
I’m sorry, but I can’t…
’

    
‘
I said do I know him?
’
she rounds on me, absolutely livid.  So shocked at her outburst, I unconsciously jump in my seat and try to look for an escape.

    
‘
I can’t tell you Maggie, for your own safety, for Bethany’s.  I can’t tell you.  Please try and understand this!
’

    
‘
How do you expect me to possibly understand when I know Thomas’s killer is still roaming the streets and you are unwilling to do anything to bring him to justice?  What can he possibly do to us?  What is making you so scared that you can’t even tell me?
’
  The emotion is clogging up her speech and it is having a poignant effect on me. 
‘
Please Alex, you can’t keep it bottled up like this.  It’s killing you!  Can’t you see that?
’

    
‘
I’d rather it kill me than you.  If you knew the truth it will slowly
drain
the life from you.  I’m thinking of Bethany here.  It wouldn’t be fair on her to have both her parents die on her.  She doesn’t deserve to become an orphan!
’
  Now it is my turn to leap from the sofa, the adrenaline taking control.

    
‘
Not knowing is killing me!  And don’t you dare bring Bethany into this…
’

    
‘
How can I not?  She is involved as much as the rest of us.  Whatever affects us will affect her, there’s no avoiding that.  She’s lost one parent I don’t want her to lose another!
’

    
‘
I would never leave her and for you to even think that, you must be…
’

    
‘
Maybe not physically, but mentally, yes, you’ll leave her.  Not straight away, but slowly, over time, the truth will eat away at you bit by bit until there’s nothing left.  Every time you look at Bethany you’ll be reminded.  You may come to despise her even…
’