Seductive Truths (Seductive Trilogy) (39 page)

    
‘
I’m sorry Maggie, I can’t do this anymore.
’

    
‘
Alex…
’

    
‘
I’m too tired to speak further on the subject.
’

    
‘
There’s no need to apologise to me, I understand the hardship you have been through.  Rest will do you a world of good.
’

    
Why do you have to be so nice Maggie?  It only makes lying to you more painful
.

    
‘
Can I stay the night?
’

    
‘
Of course you can, there’s no need to ask.  In fact, you can stay for as long as you like.
’

    
‘
I don’t want to impose…
’

    
‘
Don’t be stupid Alex, you wouldn’t be imposing.  Bethany and I love having you around, it’s just a shame we don’t see you as often as we would like to.  I know, why don’t you stay till the end of the week.  Bethany would love to show you all her new toys and talk endlessly about school and as for me I could do with the adult company for a change.  There is only so much of playing tea parties with dollies and soft toys I can take.
’

      I am so glad Maggie is in my life.  She’s one amazing woman.  Never fails to lift your spirits.

    
‘
I’ll think about it.
’

    
‘
Thank you,
’
she leans over and squeezes my hand. 
‘
Right.  I know who will be buzzing with excitement to see you.  I’ll be right back,
’
and off she goes to retrieve Bethany.

     Till the end of the week she said.  That gives me three days in their company.  I can do that and Gareth will be alright until then.  Like he said, he won’t be going anywhere.

     So I have three days.

     Three days to feel normality again.

     Three days to sort my head out.

     Three days to work out what the hell I want to do with my life.    

    
‘
Wakey, wakey Lexi.  Time to rise and shine, it’s your big day today!
’

    
‘
Go away Thomas.
’

    
‘
Come on sis, you can’t miss your driving test!
’

    
‘
I said go away.
’

     Using what energy I have I manage to lob a pillow at him, whether or not it hit him is a different matter as I currently have my head smothered under my bed cover.

    
‘
And I said wake, up!
’
and I find myself unceremoniously thrown from my bed, tumbling to the ground.  However, the expected thump and hard impact of my wooden floor doesn’t come.  Instead I find myself sitting in the driver’s seat of a car.  A scuffling noise catches my attention and looking across to my left there’s a man holding a clipboard, pen in pocket and name badge pinned to his left breast side of his coat.

    
‘
Are you ready, Alex?
’

    
‘
Ready for what?
’
I ask confused.

    
‘
Ready for your test of course.
’

    
‘
Test, right, got it,
’
and I fix my eyes on th
e tarmac ahead.  I let the handbrake
off and gradually press down on the accelerator, slowly edging forward on the road.

     As I round the corner, the instructor directs,
‘
Head for that target.
’

     Seeing nothing, I turn to the man and ask,
‘
What target?
’

    
‘
The one with the pin stripe shirt,
’
he sneers and before I can contradict him, the car leaps forward at an alarming rate.  In shock I gaze down to my feet only to see them nowhere near the pedals, but the accelerator is flush with the floor.  The pin stripe shirt looms ever closer.  Fear gripping my heart I try twisting the steering wheel this way and that, but nothing.  The car remains in a straight line, getting faster and faster - 30mph, 40mph, and 50mph.  I have no control over the car.

     I turn to my instructor with fear only to be further shocked when I see William sitting in his place staring back at me, gun in hand with its barrel pointing directly at my forehead. 
This is it
I panic. 
This is how my life is going to end
.

    
‘
That’s it Alex, keep on driving.
’

    
‘
Stop it William, just stop it!  How could you?  How could you?
’
 

     Tears start to slide down my cheek as an image of Thomas’s face with his
favourite
pin stripe shirt comes crashing into my windscreen, then goes flying over the hood of the car.  Before smashing into his body I see my baby brother mouth the word
“
sorry
”
and all this happens in slow motion.  As if time has slowed down specifically to capture the horrific moment.

     I gaze into the rear view mirror to see the ghastly scene of his body lying bloody and crumpled on the cold, damp tarmac, bits of car light littering the street. 

     With pure rage burning me up inside I snap my head back round to my passenger, a thousand hateful words ready to fire off the tip of my tongue, but William no longer occupies the seat.

     Silvery blue light shines in my direction surrounded by dirty blonde locks flopping down either side, framing his handsome rugged face.  A small smile lifts up one side of his mouth as he whispers into the darkness,
‘
You have me.  Everything will be fine.
’

     It’s infectious and I am uncontrollable to return one in kind.  Feeling an overwhelming sense of being safe I allow myself to rest my tired eyes and let the warmth of Gareth’s voice wash over me as he continues to whisper.

    
‘
Listen to your heart Alex.  Follow it.  Trust it.  You have me.  You have us.  You have…
’

    
‘
Wakey, wakey Auntie Lex.  Time to get up and play.
’
 

     I feel myself being bounced around.  Groggily I open one eye to see Bethany jumping up and down at the bottom of my bed full of energy. 
Ah the joys of being young and the incapacity of having
a lie in!
 

    
‘
Mummy said we can have a picnic today as it is nice weather.  We are going to the park!
’

    
‘
Beth, get down from there now!
’
  Painstakingly I turn my head from the bouncing bundle of joy to see Maggie walk into the room with a cup of coffee in her hand. 
‘
What have I told you about jumping on beds?
’

    
‘
But I want Auntie Lex to play with me,
’
Bethany whines.

    
‘
She will in her own time.  Let her wake up first.  Not everyone is as bright as you in the mornings.
’

    
‘
Mornings are best!
’
she says as she catapults off the bed and onto the floor, before hurtling out of the room.

    
‘
That child is always up with the sun.  I’m sure she’ll have a different attitude when she hits her teenage years,
’
Maggie states while placing the cup of coffee on the nightstand next to the bed.

    
‘
You can blame my brother for that wonderful gene.  He was always a morning person.  Come rain or shine he’d be up at the crack of dawn eager for the day to begin.
’

    
‘
Yes, as I remember, that was the one quality I
always irritated by
,
’
Maggie smiles and a brief melancholy settles between the two of us as we think back to the
man
who added a ray of sunshine to our lives.  No matter what the weather or how low we felt, we could always rely on Thomas to brighten our day.

     However, the joyful image of Thomas’s face turns to one of sadness and eyes filled with fear, like the one presented in the dream, just before being hit.  Changing the subject quickly I ask Maggie about the picnic she has planned.

    
‘
Oh, I thought with the promise of beautiful weather and as you are here, we could spend the majority of the day at the park.  Bethany’s not due in for school and a bit of fresh air will do us a world of good.  I also know how you love to spoil your niece whenever the opportunity arises.
’

    
‘
How can I refuse?
’

    
‘
Great.  I’ll make a start on the food and drink.
’
  Gazing at her watch she says,
‘
Say, be ready by ten, quarter past at the latest?
’

    
‘
It sounds perfect.
’

     Her features soften. 
‘
I’m glad you’re back.  I’ve missed you.
’

    
‘
I’ve missed you too Maggie, both you and little Bethany.
’

    
‘
I’ll leave you to get ready then.
’
  She goes to stand but half way up she pauses and turns to me placing a hand on my shoulder. 
‘
Everything will be fine in the end, you’ll see,
’
and she leans in giving me a motherly kiss on my head, smiles and walks away, leaving only my thoughts for company.

    
I hope she’s right
.




     There is nothing more tranquil than soaking up the rays of the sun beaming down on your face, with a gentle breeze drifting in the air and around you, sweeping away your troubles as it floats off into the distance, and all this in the company of those you love.  It’s a
memory I will hold onto for the rest of my life.

     As I lay here, arms behind my head, eyes closed, touch and sound are heightened.  The slightly damp blades of grass dance across my skin encouraging me to sway to their rhythm
and I hear Bethany’s high-pitched squeal in the distance causing my lips to spread into a tender smile. 
Such sweet innocence and at times I wish I could regain that quality of my life.
 

     Full from the delicious spread Maggie put together, I now listen to the world around me.  Many breeds of birds singing in harmony to their own song and flittering from tree to tree, occasionally stopping on the ground to pick up a morsel of food left behind from previous picnickers.  Children’s innocent joy as they chase each other around the park.  Dogs lollop this way and that, a few mischievous ones throwing themselves into the pond in a vain attempt to catch a squawking duck, with their owners standing on the edge going ballistic.  And in the secluded corners of this magical place you’ll find courting couples whispering sweet words of love and affection to one another, continuously touching with a kiss or two to show what words cannot, oblivious to the obstacles life has in store for them. 
Oh to be young love’s dream.

    
‘
Humph.
’
  I open my eyes and look to my side to see a worn out Maggie, collapsed and flat out on the rug. 
‘
That’s it!  I’m exhausted.
’

    
‘
Come on mummy, you can’t sit down yet, I still want to play,
’
whines Bethany while in the process of tugging on her poor shattered mother’s arm.

    
‘
You’ve worn me out my little darling.  Why don’t you see if your wonderful Auntie would like to join you?
’
  She gazes at me with a twinkle in her eye. 
‘
I think it’s about time Alex should be put through her paces and spend some quality time with you and your energy, while I’ll just recoup and bask in the sun,
’
and she does exactly that.  Eyes close, head back and she’s gone, gently breathing in the fresh air as she takes a nap.