Serendipity (24 page)

“Keith, I don’t know if this is such a good idea.” My hands start to shake as Keith passes me the reigns.

“You’ll be fine. I’ll even hold on to her, and we’ll go slowly. I won’t let anything happen to you,” he promises and I believe him.

He leads Lady out into the open field past the fire pit. Lady is so calm and gentle, and I’m beginning to see why people ride. There is no way to describe the feeling you have when you’re seated on top of an animal, high above the ground, striding along in the open with the breeze blowing through your hair. Granted, Keith is helping me today but if I kept up riding, I’m sure it would feel like the most freeing thing ever—almost as good as running.

I make an attempt to call Phoebe once a day, even though I know she’s not going to answer. I miss her so damn much that just hearing the sound of her voice on her voicemail is enough to make me smile. I feel like I’ve been in hell the past few days. Nothing is helping the pain that I feel. She should be moving into her condo tomorrow, so I plan to go back home.

I’ve talked to my mom a couple of times but she assures me she won’t tell my dad where I am. She told me that Phoebe isn’t doing well, and it breaks my heart to know that I’m the one that caused her all this pain.

I haven’t done much of anything. Yesterday I went out to the Piggly Wiggly and grabbed a few things but other than that, I’ve been wallowing in self-pity. I don’t even know if I want to go back home. Everywhere I turn, I’ll be reminded of her—especially my bedroom.

I can’t believe today is finally here. When I look back, the time at the Montgomery’s has passed in a blur. Dean hasn’t come home and I couldn’t be more grateful to him for keeping his distance.

I’m carting last minute items downstairs when the doorbell rings. “Can you get that, Phoebe?” Emily calls from the kitchen. When I step into the living room, I can see through the sheer, white curtains. My mom and Ben are standing on the porch waiting to be let in. I throw open the door and leap into my mom’s arms, throwing her slightly off balance.

I’m in such shock because she never told me they were coming. “Mom!” I screech and hug her as if I haven’t seen her in years.

“Pheebs, I’ve missed you so much,” she squeezes me tightly.

I pull back and her smile turns into a frown when she sees where the stitches were on my forehead. Pushing back my bangs, she runs her thumb over what will soon be just a faint scar. “Mom, it’s fine. I’m fine,” I assure her with a smile.

“I know, baby, I’m just glad you’re okay,” she says, looking over her shoulder at Ben.

“Hi, Ben,” I say.

“Hi, Phoebe, you look well,” he extends his arm and holds out his hand for me to shake. I reach for his hand but thankfully the awkward moment is cut short when Emily runs from the kitchen and into my mom’s arms—much like I had.

I laugh as the two women hug as if they are old friends. I take my mom upstairs, sit on the bed and tell her everything from my first day until now. She seems understanding why I’ve been acting the way I have been. It feels good to get everything off my chest, and if there is anyone who would understand, it’s my mom.

“Phoebe, I’m sorry you had to go through that without me. I’m sorry I wasn’t here for you. If you would have told me over the phone, I would have jumped on the first flight,” she takes my hands in hers and frowns when she sees the brace.

I give her hands a light squeeze. “It’s okay, Mom, really and you’re here now, that’s all that matters.” I smile.

“I know, Phoebe. I’ve been talking with Emily and she seems to think you and Dean are in love,” she gives me a questioning glance.

“I wouldn’t go that far. I mean, I’m not even sure I know what it feels like to be in love. I have feelings for Dean that I’ve never had before and when he touches me…” I stop there because right now, I’m supposed to be pissed at him—correction, I
am
pissed at him—but the way it felt when he touched me is something I don’t think I’ll get over.

“I know it hurts now but trust me, and you’ll feel better when you do, just give him a chance. I don’t want you to miss out on such a great thing like I almost did with Ben.”

“I don’t know. I don’t think I can,” I croak, blinking back the tears.

She wraps me in her arms and whispers in my ear, “These things have a way of working themselves out.” She pulls back and stands, lifting me from the bed. “Enough sadness, let’s go see your new place!” I nod. Keith, Emily, and Ben are standing in the kitchen talking and pause when we walk in.

“Everyone ready to go?” Keith asks.

“Yes, sir,” I say as I tug on my boots. I catch my mom’s gaze and I know what she’s thinking. She knows what my shoe collection consists of and cowgirl boots were definitely not something I would have added previously. Instead of saying anything, she looks back and forth between me and Emily, and shakes her head, smiling.

The condo looks different from my first walk through. Even with boxes littering the floor, it feels more like mine. I had a moving truck pick up all my boxes from my storage unit and drop them off yesterday. Keith had volunteered to meet them here so I could have some ‘girl time’ with Emily.

We spend the best part of the day unpacking my things. When our pizza arrives, we sit on the floor exchanging stories. It’s such a good feeling to see all of the people I love in one place, getting along like one big happy family.

My mom told me that Phoebe is getting settled in her new place so I’m moving back home today. I plan to stay in the loft—I’m afraid I’ll never be able to set foot into the house again. When I pull into the empty drive a wave of anguish washes over me, and I can feel the perspiration forming as I rub the back of my neck. My stomach is in knots just looking at the house. I reach into the back seat and grab my duffle bag and head straight to the barn. I know the loft is going to take some TLC, but it’s better than nothing.

Climbing up the old wooden steps, I inhale slowly and push open the door to what will soon be my new ‘home’. I half expect to see it a mess like how I left it but it’s completely cleaned out and there’s even a small refrigerator in the corner.

When I hear my dad’s truck pull in, I toss my bag down on the floor and run down the steps. I meet them in the driveway as they step out. Fuck, even seeing them reminds me of my Angel.

My mom rushes over and hugs me as if she hasn’t seen me in months, and when she lets go my dad does the same. I stiffen when he wraps his arms around me. I can’t even tell you the last time my dad has showed any kind affection towards me.

“It’s good to have you back, son,” his voice rumbles from deep within his chest.

“Thanks, Dad,” I say as I give in and wrap my arms around him, hugging him back.

I pull away and look between my parents confused. “Uh, what happened to the loft?” I ask.

“Do you like it? Your dad cleaned it up the other day for you,” my mom says with a huge smile, anticipating my answer.

“Yeah it’s great, but why?” They look at each other and share a knowing glance.

“Well, we thought you could use your own space. You’re old enough that you shouldn’t have to be living in your parents’ house and this way, we can use your room as a guest room,” my mom says.

“Wow, thank you.” Shit, I guess I’m not the only one Phoebe’s changed by coming here.

“You’re welcome. Now, let’s get you some food. Did you eat anything? You’re look like you’ve lost weight,” my mom says, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the house. I dig the heels of my boots into the ground to stop her.

“Yeah, I ate. Thank you though. I think I’m going to get a sleeping bag and get my room set up.” I think this is the first time that I’ve ever lied to my parents. I haven’t eaten since I’ve went out with Jake—I’ve been on a liquid diet, so to speak.

“If you insist,” my dad says as he holds the door open for my mom.

“I do. Goodnight.” I tip my hat to him and he gives a slight nod.

My first night in my own place. My place, my house, my home… I can’t believe it’s actually
mine
.

After Emily and Keith left, it was just me, my mom, and Ben. We unloaded boxes until our backs hurt and fatigue set in.

“I have some wine for you ladies to go with your whining,” Ben calls from the kitchen, chuckling. My mom and I sprint from my room and grab the glasses. I take a sip and lick my lips, savoring the flavor. There is nothing like a glass or three of wine to end a stressful day.

“I knew that would shut you up,” he laughs and grabs a beer from the fridge.

“Hey,” my mom and I say in unison, and then giggle.

“We should break for the night and finish up tomorrow,” I suggest, and they both agree.

My mom and Keith leave for their hotel and I lay in bed, looking around my new room. It hasn’t sunk in yet that this is all mine, but I hope it will soon. Having my mom here makes it feel like old times. I do come to the sudden realization that although I will always love Chicago, my life is here now.

Being in the house all by myself is a dangerous thing. I can’t help but to think of Dean—the good and bad times that we shared in the short week I got to know him. Tears fall and I can do nothing to stop them. My mom has always maintained that crying is good for the soul, so I let them fall and cry out when my chest contracts. The pain is overwhelming and I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy… okay, maybe Devon.