Shattered by Love (21 page)

“
I
am pregnant
.” My heart is pounding, and he’s just staring at me. “Jayce, did you hear me?” His body is rigid, but his eyes are filled with awe. My eyebrows pinch together in a frown.

“I fucking love you.” He scoops me up, and spins me around as my grip on his shoulders tighten. He slowly let’s me down and then drops to his knees.

Ice-blue pools stare up at me as he grins. Those full lips that can send me barreling over the edge tug with his signature smirk.

His big strong hand touches my flat belly tentatively. “Hey there little princess. I am your dad.” Jayce is kneeling before me talking to my stomach.

“Flash, I am not that far along, it can’t hear you.”

“
It
is a girl.” He responds with calm conviction and when he pushes up, he grips my hips pulling me to him. His lips feather over mine with a soft kiss which sends a tingle over my mouth. “You are beautiful. Were you scared to tell me?” I stare at him for a long while, and then nod.

“It’s so soon, and people will think we’re getting married because of the baby.”

“Fuck people. I don’t give a shit because you are mine, Ivy. Always. Forever.” I decide it’s time to come clean with my other news.

The big decision that’s been one of the easiest choices for me and I realize I had known since we decided to make this work. Before he even asked me to marry him.

“I suppose you will have to get used to getting up at all hours of the night, I hope your house is big enough.” The words tumble from my mouth and his blue gaze narrows on me in question. He doesn’t move and I am freaking out again. I swear he does this on purpose.

“What?” The word comes out husky and rough.

“You heard me.” Biting down on my cheek to keep from giggling, I wait for it to sink in.

“But… you said… I mean…”

“We should stay here in Los Angeles, I mean I do, with you. Near our new family, where you built a life, I want to be a part of it.” I’m not sure if he’s breathing because the shell-shocked expression on his face makes me snicker.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind moving to Chicago.” I realize he would do this for me, to be with me, but there’s nothing I want more than to be near Luke and Cassie.

Since I am about to have another baby, having a friend like her will make it fun, someone who understands and to experience it with.

My job isn’t set in stone, and I could always work from home. I would miss Bryce, he is my best friend, but my life is with Jayce.

He is my home.

“Flash, we have been apart for so long, you walked away because you were forced by my father, but I am not prepared to lose you again.” I stare at him with determination.

“I need to ask you something. The day you found me and him in his office, he told you, or asked you rather, what I could give you. The one reason I didn’t fight, or walk back in there and tell him to fuck right off, was because you didn’t counter it. You didn’t respond to him.” A frown pinches my eyebrows.
What is he talking about?
I step forward and place my hands on his chest and the heat between us is palpable.

“Jayce, you must have missed it because I had the biggest argument with him after you closed the door. All hell broke loose.”

“
D
ad
, you are wrong, Jayce is not a bad person and I haven’t been happier or more cared for. He’s a gentleman.” My voice is shrill, and it echoes through the vast room. My father is always over compensating for shit, and this office is no exception, it’s his pride and joy. His fierce glare scares me because I can see his body vibrating with rage.

“Young lady, if you go anywhere near that boy again, you will be cut off from your inheritance faster than you can think up your next snotty reply. And don’t for a second think that he loves you. He’s using you for your money. Now, go find something constructive to do and do not… I repeat, do not see him again. Do you understand me?”

“You can’t dictate my life Dad because I am not in prison here. I am allowed—” When he stalks towards me, his expression is filled with rage and this is a side of him I have never seen before.

Yes, he is a difficult man and he is serious all the time, but this is new. There’s a hatred in his cold eyes that shreds me and I know that I have no choice. I love Jayce with all that I am, but my father will hurt him or me. At that moment I understand there would never be an US with the man I love. The man I called Dad would see to it.

He leans in, his hot breath is on my face as he hisses. “If you so much as step foot in his direction again, I will make sure he and his good-for-nothing mother never see the fucking light of day again. Do not test me. Now go practice your piano or some shit and get out of my face.” My body hurts, everywhere, and I realize it’s my heart breaking. Shattering into pieces. The love I have for Jayce is being ripped from me. It’s as if my father reached into my chest, grabbed my heart and pulled it from my rib cage, because nothing will ever make it beat again.

Spinning on my heel, I head to the door, pulling it open and slamming it behind me. A sob wracks through me and everything inside me aches. When I feel hands on me, I glance up to see my sister, as she helps me up, but the sobs don’t stop. How do you make the pain of losing the only person you’ve ever loved go away? You can’t.

“Sit down. Listen Ivy, don’t worry about him, it will be okay, Jayce will fight for you.” Shaking my head, I peer into matching blue eyes, but my tears make her form blurry.

“He’s threatened Flash’s mom, as much as I know that he doesn’t get on with her, he won’t let anything happen to her.” She pulls me in and holds me while I cry. Her blouse is soaked with my salty tears as they burn their way down my cheeks. “It hurts. How can it hurt so much?”

“Shh… Just cry. I am here.” And I do. I cry for me, for Jayce, his mother, and my heart. I know he loves me, there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me, and I can’t imagine how torn he is right now. Maybe I can talk to him, make him see that we belong together and we could run away. I don’t care about my father’s money.

I never did, he knows that. We could live anywhere and I could find a job, my mind is made up and I decide that would be the best plan. Yes, we can make it work. We could go away far from here. I need to go to him.

W
hen I finish recounting
what happened that day, I watch as the truth sinks in. “Is that why you came to my apartment that day?” I nod. The pain of that is still so real, even though it happened five years ago. “You would have run away with me?” Shock, amusement, and awe flit across his handsome face which makes me giggle.

“I would run anywhere with you, handsome. You should have known that then, and you should know it now. I want to come with you when you see her because it will be difficult for you, and I want to support you.”

He nods. It’s settled, we’re heading off to see what state she’s in and I recall the few times I saw her. The woman was definitely a mess, at least, that’s how I remember her.

She was constantly falling around drunk, or high, and Jayce would be ready to leave his house as soon as I arrived. I realized later on that he was ashamed of the place he lived in. He didn’t have to be because I felt the same about the house I grew up in. Not because of me living in squalor, but because there was no love in it. It was never a home, not even my mother was a loving person, she was as cold as my father.

I glance at him now and see the anguish in his expression. Him having to go through this as a grown man must be as intense and painful as if he were that angry teenager. I knew he loved her, but the anger and resentment from all those years of pain she put him through must weigh heavy on him.

“We can ask Cassie and Luke to look after Ben. It’s not far to Bakersfield, so I am sure we will be back tomorrow. Also, I don’t know exactly what’s happened, but if it’s as bad as I think it is, then I am walking away because I have my life on the right track, I have the woman I love, and if my mother is about to fuck my life up again, then I will say goodbye.”

T
he police station
is bigger than I expected and there are people milling around. When I reach the counter, the uniformed man looks up at me and I stop admonishing myself for coming. This was the woman who treated me like shit most of my teenage life and the memories of her and those parties she held still turn me cold.

“How may I help you, sir?” The rookie sitting at the desk offers me tired smile.

“I am here to see Detective Dunston. He called me about Mrs. Alexander being brought in.” He nods, taps away on his keyboard and it feels as if time has slowed. I have no idea what to expect and it has me tense, or perhaps it is having to look at her again, the woman who birthed me.

Ivy’s hand slips into mine, offering me comfort with her presence. The only thing in my world that seems to be right is this beautiful angel and my son.

“It shows she’s in lock up at the moment, I will call the detective.” The young man who can’t be older than twenty, rises and walks toward the rear of the building behind steel doors.

“Flash, look at me?” I drag my gaze to my sweet girl. “I am here okay. There is nowhere I would rather be than by your side.” Her smile is soft and kind, and I realize she can’t tell me things will work out, because we both don’t know if they will or not.

The door to the main building flies open and we both turn to see Ivy’s father stalk in. His glare lands on us and my body tenses as if there’s ice running through my veins, steeling me for what’s coming.

What the fuck is he doing here?

“Father?” Ivy’s confusion matches mine. “What are you doing here?”

Narrowing his cold eyes, he scowls at me. Ignoring his daughter, he leans in close and hisses. “I got rid of you and your mother once and you’ve returned to poison my daughter’s life, you will not get away with it. Over my dead fucking body will you marry into my family.”

The fire heating my blood is at boiling point and if I move an inch, I don’t doubt I’ll knock this fucker out. Ivy steps between us before I have time to respond.

“You should leave, since you have no right to be here, or to talk to my fiancé like that. I am getting married to Jayce and you will not stop me. Do you understand me?” Her voice is as cold as his eyes and he has the audacity to wince. “You are not my father. I hate you for what you have done to me and Lacey. Over your dead body? I’ll gladly take that offer.”

His glare falls on her, and for a moment I think he will relent, but the cold-hearted bastard doesn’t. Not even for his baby daughter.

“You have both defied me by doing what you want, so I will see that none of the Devereaux fortune is given to either of you. Do you hear me? You will get nothing from me.” Just then the detective walks into the waiting area and his narrowed gaze flits between the three of us.

“Is everything okay here?”

“Yes, I need to see my mother.” I step forward, pulling my girl along with me.

“I am here to see the accused, she’s my client.” My laugh is loud as I pivot to him.

“Client? So you’re a lawyer now?” My gaze pins him to the spot, but the evil smirk that pulls on his lips tells me I am missing something.

“Oh, she didn’t tell you? I have been bailing her out for years.” He lowers his voice. “How do you think I made sure you left my daughter in peace?” Anger flares through me and I raise my fist, before I make contact, Ivy’s hand squeezes mine.

“Jayce, let’s just go to her.” Her sweet voice cuts through the haze of fury raging, calming the tornado that is about to burst free from me.

He’s not worth it because if I hit him now, they will arrest me and that’s what he wants. I turn, stepping through the doors as we head into a long hallway that leads to an interrogation room. Ivy and I slip into chairs beside each other and I watch as the short detective gets comfortable opposite us.

“Mr. Alexander, your mother is in a hell of a lot of trouble. She has been brought in for selling drugs, a mix of cocaine, marijuana, and a bag of pills we’re having tested. She’s signed statement already confessing to having knowledge of a murder, of a Mr Verán. She’s requested to tell you the story herself, but she’s in a hell of a lot of trouble.”

“What? I mean, what does that mean?”

“That she will be behind bars for a long time, Mr. Alexander.” His grave expression sends a jolt of fear through me. This was it; she’s finally fucked up so bad I can’t help her.

“This is preposterous, that wasn’t a murder. Let me talk to her, I will sort this out.” Ivy’s father is rigid, but this time it’s not anger, it’s fear I see dancing across his features.

“There’s nothing you can do, sir. Can I ask who you are?”

Ignoring the conversation, I stare at the detective.

“Can I see her?” I need to make a decision that will not only impact me, but Ivy and Ben, and my unborn baby. I have to talk to her and finally tell her what I should have said a long time ago. He nods, pushes up from the chair, and glances at Mr. Devereaux.

“I will have to ask you to leave. It will be family only.” The hate filled glare that the old man pins me with is chilling.

“My daughter is no family of theirs.” He spews angrily.

“That’s where you’re wrong because Jayce is my family now.” Her hand grips mine and her body shudders.

“You’ll regret this young lady. Mark my words.” Once we’re alone, I turn to her and find those big blue eyes shining with unshed tears.

“Baby, I’m so sorry he said that to you.”

“No, he needed to hear it because I want nothing to do with him and I meant what I said you are my family.”

I am about to lean in and plant a soft kiss on her lips when the door flies open and I come face to face with the woman I spent my life running from.

“Jayce…” Her voice is hoarse. She looks terrible, but her pupils aren’t dilated like I am so used to seeing. The way she says my name makes my heart gallop, and my memory flits to a time when she was real. When she was a mother I could love, it was so long ago that it’s a fuzzy image in my mind.

Her eyes fall on Ivy and she smiles, then they land on me and as she slips into the chair opposite us, her eyes never stray from mine.

“What happened to you? I mean, how did you fall so low?” My question is a whisper, filled with shock, pain, and anger.

“I need to talk to you, to tell you everything. Once I have, you have to leave. Turn around and don’t look back, do you hear me?” The urgency in her tone has me frowning, but I nod. “It started when I met Claudia, she wasn’t a Verán then, she had just come back from Europe, before she sank her claws into Lucien’s father.”

Her gaze settles on Ivy, and there is regret written all over her features. “She and your father, Richard Devereaux, wanted Verán Industries, so they plotted and planned. The problem was I found out about it when I was cleaning the Verán house one day, I found papers that had Claudia’s devious plan to poison Mr. Verán all over it. She would however do it over a few years, so there isn’t any speculation. She would then take over the company and…”

When she drops her gaze, my heart jumps into my throat.
Fuck.
Lucien will completely lose it if he finds out. I remember being at the hospital when his father died, he was shattered and this would send him over the edge.

“I don’t understand, what do you have to do with this, why didn’t you go to the police?”

“They caught me with the documents in my hand. Richard invited me for a drink and I thought he wanted to come clean until he had fed me a whiskey laced with drugs. That was my hook.” Guilt is etched on her expression. “Then after years of slowly poisoning him, they almost got it right. Until Cassie’s mom stepped in. She loved Lucien’s father for most of her life, and for her to see what they did to him, it must have nearly killed her. She was too late to save him, but she saved the company, and the Verán name, thank God for that.” Another frown creases my brows, but I stay silent. All the while, my hand in Ivy’s has tightened and I realize I must be hurting her.

“Jayce, I wasn’t strong enough to fight them. Ivy’s father made sure I was always fully supplied with whatever drug I wanted. He knew me long before either of you were born, knew my personality is one of an addict. They couldn’t do anything to me without looking suspicious, because if they looked into my past, they would find my relationship with Richard.”

“What?” My voice comes out louder than I expect and I glance at the door, waiting and when nobody walks in, I look into eyes that match mine.

“I dated him when I was much younger. It was a short fling, but he didn’t forget how I would love to party, he knew that if he could get me hooked, I wouldn’t be a threat. So…” Her deep inhale is slow. It looks as if she’s trying to calm herself. “Anyway, I am in here because I am testifying against him and Claudia. They will be put away and I will check into a rehab center, then I am leaving the country. I can’t be around here anymore and I need to clean up my act. It’s gone on too long.”

The silence in the room is stifling. Turning to my girl, I stare at her for a moment, and she gives me a nod. She’s with me. Facing my mother, I sigh, “Mom,” I reach for her hand. “Thank you for your honesty, I mean, I was angry for years at what you did and I suppose, I understand now. Ivy and I are getting married.” Her gaze flits between us and she smiles affectionately. It’s so foreign to see that I feel my eyes sting with tears.

“Good. You have a wonderful woman, look after her. Please?” I nod slowly. Taking in her appearance, I can see she’s aged, and she looks exhausted. The years have taken their toll, and I wish she and I had a better relationship. One that I can say I remember fondly.

“I will. You have a grandson too. His name is Ben.” I pull out a small photo and turn it, showing her the little boy who’s stolen my heart. There are tears in her eyes and when she blinks, they make a slow steady path down her face.

“He’s beautiful.” She peers at me and cocks her head to the side. “I always knew you would make it because you were strong. You still are. I will always love you, Jayce. There wasn’t a time I didn’t and even though I wasn’t a good mother, deep down I did what I could to keep you safe. He would have hurt you if I fought back and I would rather die than see you hurt.”

Her words slice into me, cutting through the pain I have held onto for most of my life, allowing my heart to open to a woman who loved, even when she did everything to keep me at arms length. As soon as the realization hits me, it all becomes clear. “So you made me angry, pushed me away to make sure I was safe? What about Ivy? I walked out on her because of that fucker?” The question is a growl, and I watch her flinch.

“Jayce, he would never hurt her, but he would do something to you.” The confidence in her statement chills me. “I realize he is here now, hoping to make sure I stay quiet, but I won’t. Not anymore.” We sit in silence for what feels like hours before the door opens and I glance at the detective.

“I have to take her back to holding.” I nod. Without a word, I push up from my seat and round the table. Pulling her into my arms, I hold my mother for what may be the last time and the thought breaks me, but I know it’s for the best. She needs help, and I will do what I can for her, but this is one thing I know she has to face alone.

She gives Ivy a hug and whispers in her ear and when she steps backward, Ivy nods in response.

“Give me one more minute alone with my son?” My mother’s voice is rough with emotion as she talks to the man waiting to take her away. He gives one small nod and escorts my fiancée out. I stare at the woman who’s a stranger. “Jayce, I realize I wasn’t the mother you deserve, I never was. As I sat in those cells each time I was arrested, I knew I wasn’t worthy of your love or forgiveness. I don’t ask for it, the only thing you need to know is I am so proud you’ve made something of yourself. It may not be much, but I love you so much my sweet boy.”

“Mom—”

“Let me finish. I will get clean this time and I don’t want you to waste another moment worrying about me. Live your life for your girl and have a family and make her smile every day. I am so happy you’ve both found each other again. Living without the one person that completes you eats away at your soul. I am strong enough to fight this, I know I am, and when I look at you, I see one thing in my life I have done right. You.” She leans in and hugs me.