Shattered by Love (16 page)

“So, the wedding… It’s… I mean… He doesn’t love her?” I shake my head and when I meet her gaze, I see something that wasn’t there moments before. Hope. Instantly it dawns on me, slapping me in the face. Oh. My. God.

My mouth drops open and my eyebrows crease with a frown. “You’re in love with Cole?” My question is a whisper of disbelief. She nods and her gaze falls to my dress. Shit.
She’s making a wedding dress for a woman that will marry someone she loves?
That must be the ultimate knife to the heart. I wouldn’t be able to survive that if that were me.

“Since I was thirteen.” My heart aches for her.
How can she even be here?
To stand here, hold her head up and smile can’t be easy.

“Oh my God, Kenna. This must tear you apart. How do you know him?”

“We were high school sweethearts, then college sweethearts. Everyone thought we… Anyway. I walked away.” Her eyes are filled with tears and when I reach for her, she let’s me pull her into a hug. My heart gallops in my chest, maybe we can make this right.
Can’t we? Does my sister know?
I mean, surely she wouldn’t have done this if she knew about Cole and Kenna. “Kenna, if you love him, you need to tell him.”

My gaze implores her. We need to make this right because I can’t see two people get married because they’re forced to. Even though this is my sister, I know we can figure something out.

“I can’t. There is no way I can break up his marriage. Even if he doesn’t love your sister.”

“If you don’t, you’ll regret it forever.” She stares at me and I am sure she will tell me to go to hell, but then she smiles. It’s a wry smile and there is disbelief written all over her face.

“You’re telling me to break up your sister’s wedding?” I nod.

“There’s no emotion between them. When you marry someone it should be the person you were meant for, not because you’re forced to marry them. My father can’t win all the time, he needs to be knocked back down a notch and my sister is too scared to do it. But, if she’s forced to, then who knows.” I stand and turn, lifting my hair so she can unzip me. I slide the dress off and hand it to her.

Stepping behind the screen, I pull on my jeans and top. My mind is whirling with an idea on how to fix this. Lacey loves Aiden and he is the father of her unborn child.

Dad will definitely lose his shit if we do this, but I don’t care. He’s turned me into this; he has to accept that he can’t rule his daughter’s lives forever.

Once I’m dressed, I step out from behind the screen. “Kenna, you may not like me, or whatever, but I hate seeing people who love each other stuck in circumstances they’re not mean to be in.”

“It’s not that I don’t like you, I think I was shocked that you had a son and didn’t tell him.”

“I know. There were many reasons why I didn’t, but I can’t justify them anymore because I should have told him. I just want a second chance. Everyone deserves one.” We stare at each other for a long while. There is still indecision in her gaze, but I can tell she’s thinking about what I said. “Thank you for the dress, I guess I will see you at the wedding.”

“Yes, thank you, Ivy. I mean, I have no idea how things are going to work out, but, I hope we all get our happy ending.” With a quick nod, I leave her to mull the thoughts over in her mind.

I make my way upstairs to find my boys. Jayce promised me a ring, and I am excited to wear it.

Life has given me a second chance, and I will not fuck it up this time. He’s finally back in my life and no one, not even my father will take him away.

T
hat was an interesting hour
. Ivy is sweet and what she said about Cole and Lacey replays in my mind.
Is he really being forced to marry her?
The man I knew wouldn’t have allowed himself to be pushed into a situation like this because he’s always been straightforward and stood up for what he believed in. There is no way I can see him marrying a girl he doesn’t love unless there is an explanation. That means I should talk to him.

Ivy was right, taking a chance and being honest with my feelings for him is something I have to do, or I will spend my life regretting it. Looking around, I realize I have to tidy up before I leave, since the dresses are ready, I am free to leave.

I decided to fly out tonight, after confirming my flight last night, I think it’s best that I let them celebrate, but before I walk away again, I want to find Cole. One last goodbye. The thought leaves me breathless and that familiar pain is there, its ever-present. When you’ve lived with pain like this for so long you become accustomed to it. Seeing Cole again has just intensified it, given time it will dull, but it never leaves.

A knock at the door startles me. “Come in.” As soon as the person on the other side comes into view, my breathing hitches. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to see why the hotel told me you’re checking out this evening.”

“I can’t stay, Cole, since the job you hired me to do is complete.” He steps inside and I take in his appearance, dressed in grey slacks and a black button up, he is the picture of a perfect male. The dark scruff on his jaw is evidence he didn’t shave this morning. His tousled hair looks inviting, I wish I could run my fingers through it.

“I hired you because I needed to see you and show you how much I love you, this situation isn’t what you think it is.”

“Situation? You wanted to see if I am jealous that you are marrying another woman?” Anger erupts through my veins sending me into a fit of rage. “How dare you?”

“How dare me? You fucking walked out Kenna and I was the one left with a heart torn. Not you. I was there every fucking day for you and what did I get in return? You walking out the door with your fucking suitcase.” His body is vibrating with rage and his hands fist at his sides. This is the first time I have seen Cole lose control. I didn’t tell him the real reason I left and I don’t think I ever could.

“I know.” Dropping my eyes, I feel tears burning. If I blink they’ll fall, but I don’t want him to see me cry. Not again. Turning, I busy myself with the material on the desk. “I fucked up Cole, I always did. You remember as a kid how I used to get into shit. The only thing I ever regret fucking up is you. Us.” Once I start, I find I can’t stop as the words tumble from my mouth and tears spill down my cheeks.

I feel him behind me, his warmth, and it stirs feelings I kept hidden, buried deep inside so long I thought they’d never return. My soul recognizes his, it knows him, even after all these years he is still a part of me.

“You fucked up.” His voice is at my ear and his breath on my skin is unbearable. It intoxicates every inch of my being and I ache for his mouth on me, and his cock inside me so fucking deep I can’t think about anything else. Squeezing my thighs together, I still. “You know why? Because I want you. Kenna, I want to be with you. I love you. Always have and always will. You may have walked out, but I am walking back in.” He spins me around, pressing his body against mine. His hands grip my ass, lifting me onto the table. When he steps between my legs, Cole’s scorching palms run up my thighs and the fact that I am wearing shorts doesn’t help.

“Where’s Lacey?” The rasp in my tone annoys me. I am so affected by him it’s unbelievable. Placing my palms on his chest, I push him back because I can’t think with him so close.

He’s still engaged. I’m still angry. We’re both so hurt, it runs through in our veins. He looks at me as he steps backward and as soon as he does I feel cold, immediately missing his warmth.

“There’s something you don’t know about the wedding.” I snap my gaze to him, and I find the truth glistening in his amber gaze. “The wedding will happen, but it won’t be between me and her.”

“What do you mean?”

“She’s in love with someone else, has been for a long time, so have I. Our families have tried to push us together for their benefit to make sure they don’t lose their millions. We’ve found the contract through a lawyer I hired, and we have a plan.”

“This isn’t funny Cole, I can’t go through losing you again.” Pushing off the table, I walk towards the window needing to put space between us so I can think. This is what Ivy was telling me about, but I still can’t bring myself to allow that ounce of hope that seems to flourish in my heart.

“Damn it, Kenna, I am not joking, this is serious. I am not marrying her. I love you. Do you fucking understand me?” His low timber sends desire spiraling through my body. I pivot to look into those beautiful eyes that always look right into my soul. To the essence of who I am.
What am I looking for? Can this really be my future? With Cole?

My head is spinning with all the possibilities he is promising me. There were times he promised me the world
. Is that what he will give me now?
I swallow the lump in my throat, as soon as I blink, salty tears fall, running down my cheeks. He reaches out and this time I don’t move or flinch because I want his touch.

With the pads of his thumbs, he swipes away the sadness that wets my cheeks. Our gazes are locked as he holds me hostage with blazing eyes. The only sound in the room is our breathing as his thumb traces a path over my lower lip.

His touch sears my skin and the love I stifled rears up to flow through my veins.

“You mean…” My head can’t fathom what this means, it sounds like a goddamn fairytale where I find my prince and we ride off into the sunset, but real life isn’t as easy.

“I mean there’s nothing stopping us being together, Ken.” He leans in and my eyes flutter closed. My heart thuds against my rib cage so hard that I am sure it’s about to fight its way out. Our lips brush against each other and my body is humming with need. “I want you. To have your pussy wrapped around my cock. To feel as your body quivers and writhes beneath me. I have missed that so much.”

“Cole, we can’t do this here.”

“No, we can’t. Kenna, you have to understand when you left it tore me apart because I loved you with everything I had. You broke me when you didn’t accept my ring and now we have a chance, we have to work through five years of buried feelings, but I want you.”

I’m excited by the thought of being with him because I know we are made for each other, there is no doubt in my mind I love him, but I am weary of the wedding and what will happen. I can’t just take another woman’s man. If what Cole says is true, that there will be a wedding, but he isn’t getting married then I need to stay and be here for him. I need to be selfish and hope he’s right and I can have my happy ending.

“Okay. We can try.”

“Come on, this time I am not letting you out of my sight, Cherry Pie.” My cheeks heat with a blush.

“I told you Cole, don’t call me that.” He turns and stares at me, wickedness flits in his gaze and I can’t help smiling.

“I can call you anything I want. You’re mine.” His cheeky wink I fell in love with all those years ago is out in full force. He’s still the one that makes me want all the things I walked away from.

A family. A husband. A forever.

W
alking
down the road with Ivy, holding her hand, feeling her body near mine, is still a feeling I am getting accustomed to. She’s my fiancée and soon enough she will be my wife.

“Dad, look at that!” Ben exclaims pointing to a magician doing tricks on one of the cobbled streets.

“Do you want to watch?” He nods running off, leaving us to follow.

“You’re incredible you know that?” I murmur in her ear. With a quick glance at my girl, I find a smile light up her face and her blue eyes are shimmering with mischief.

“I am? Why, Mr. Alexander, aren’t you an incredibly sweet man?” Her giggle is infectious and soon I am chuckling. The Southern accent she puts on is adorable and sexy as all hell.

“Only for the lady I love.” I glance over at Ben, he’s enthralled by the magician. I realize in that moment, I am happy. Complete.

My life feels full as if there isn’t anything that can go wrong. Leaning in, I inhale her sweet vanilla scent. It’s the first thing I ever remember about kissing her that first time, when I got a taste of her lips. “I want to taste you. Feel you. Your hot little pussy needs to be around my cock.”

Her breathing becomes erratic and I can see her pulse skittering in her neck.

“Flash… behave.”

“Nope.” I chuckle. “Ben, let’s go buddy, I want to get your mom a present.”

“Can I have one too?” He looks up at me with his mom’s eyes. She says he looks like me, but I think differently. Our son is gorgeous, just like her.

“Sure, what did you want?”

“Uhm… can we go to the toy store?” I nod, grabbing his hand as we walk down to the jewelry store. His hand fits in mine as if it was made to be there. How a father can leave his son is beyond me because I could never leave this little guy. My mouth tugs into a smile as he drags me behind him.

“First, we need to get a pretty ring on your mom’s finger before she runs off.” I wink at Ivy, and she swats my shoulder, which I think hurt her hand more than it hurt me.

“You know I am not running off anywhere.”

“I know, Firefly. I was teasing, you know how I love to tease.”

The store we find is small, but it has a range of exquisite rings. The owner presents us with five options after Ivy told him what she prefers.

There’s one ring I lay my eyes on as soon as he sets it down and I realize it is perfect. A platinum band with round diamonds complements the radiance of a princess cut diamond in the center. The ring I had bought for her years ago is at home, it will fit perfectly alongside this one, which makes me smile.

“This one.” Ivy points to the same ring I had my eye on and I take it from the black velvet box while turning to her. Dropping to my knee in front of the staff and other customers, glancing up at the woman that is etched in my heart.

“Firefly, I realize this is not the traditional way of doing it, but our relationship isn’t the most conventional. When I first laid eyes on you at the age of seventeen, I vowed that one day somehow, I would make you mine. It took me a few years to pluck up the courage to talk to you, and since then, I’ve been hooked. You’ve given me everything I have ever yearned for. I want you and our son to be the family I have prayed for since our lips first touched. I promised you I will always find my way back to you, and now that I have I will never stray from you. You’ve been in my heart, mind, and soul for as long as I remember. Will you light my path forever?”

The silence in the store is deafening as everyone stops moving to watch us. Even though I proposed last night, this has more significance because Ben is here too.

“Yes. Always. There is never any doubt I am yours.” I slip the ring on her finger, it’s a perfect fit.
What are the chances?
I am so fucking lucky.

“Are you going to live with us now, Dad?” Ben is adorable and way too intuitive for his age. I nod.

“Yes, buddy, I am.” Glancing at Ivy, the tears in her eyes tell me she wasn’t expecting me to pick up my life in LA and move across the country to Chicago.

Rising, I give my fiancée a kiss and the people in the store start with an applause that has Ivy’s cheeks pink with a blush. The thought of making her ass the same color has my cock thickening in my jeans. I wouldn’t mind taking her back to the hotel, but I promised Ben a visit to the toy store first.

“
B
en
, come over here, I want to talk to you.”

The whole day was spent sightseeing and he is tired, I can see those big inquisitive eyes are droopy. Ivy is sitting on the sofa watching television, but I want to tell my son something. Even though he may not understand it until he’s older, it is something I need to get off my chest.

“What are you two up to?” Glancing at my girl, I shrug, this is between me and my son, for now.

Pulling him up, I place him on my knee, and look into his eyes and they’re curious, he reminds me so much of my fiancée.

She has this look of playfulness and curiosity when I am about to divulge something and I can’t stop grinning. “Ben, I need you to know that I love you. Any time in your life, when things are confusing, or you’re not sure what to do, remember that you’re my boy, and I will never leave you. When you meet your Uncle Luke and Aunt Cassie tomorrow, you will be safe with them. They’re very special to me, just like your mom and you. Okay?”

“Okay, dad. I like having you around. Mom used to tell me about you because she has photos of you in a box. There is a special day she shows them to me.”

“What day is that, squirt?”

“April 2 and 3, she told me it’s the best day of the year after my birthday.” My heart kicks hard against my ribs. April 23
^rd
. My gaze falls on the blonde beauty, and she must feel my gaze on her because she turns to face me again.

“What?” Shaking my head, I look at Ben and plant a kiss on his forehead. Once I help him to his feet, he runs to the sofa, flopping next to his mother. I follow and lean over to whisper in her ear.

“My birthday?” Her gasp is sharp.

“Yes.” The answer is a soft moan. She’s always loved me and that makes my heart soar.

T
he last two
days have been surreal. Spending time with my girl and my son is a feeling I can never tire of. When you spend all your time trying to prove yourself to people, there comes a time when you just want to be accepted. That’s what Ivy does for me, she accepts my flaws, no matter how bad, and she loves me through the imperfections I know I have.

“You’re absolutely sure you want to come to LA with me?” I glance at her. We’ve been discussing what we will do tomorrow, and Ivy is adamant she and Ben are coming to meet Luke and Cassie. Even though she’s nervous, she nods.

As we enter the hotel after our lunch we find the place buzzing with staff and guests. Today is the day. The wedding that has been flooding media for weeks. “Looks like it’s almost time.” I mumble as we head upstairs to the room. “We better get ready.” Planting a soft chaste kiss on Ivy’s lips, I leave her and Ben in the bedroom and I head into the bathroom.

I hate wearing a suit, so I decided on black pants with a button-down shirt. Luke said I should wear a tie, but that will not happen because the only time I will ever wear one is for my wedding.

I wonder if Ivy would want a beach wedding because I could go for that. Swim shorts and a no shirt and she would look incredible in a black bikini. Or white. Fuck, I want to be inside her.

The thought of feeling her around me invades my senses. Shit, I need to calm down or I will end up with a hard on throughout the goddamn ceremony.

Luke and I have to talk about me packing up and moving to Chicago.

Walking into the bedroom, I find my little man dressed in a shirt and pants. He looks so smart. “Right buddy, you ready to impress the crowd? You going to help me take some awesome photos?” He nods, holding onto my hand.

“Yes, I can help take pictures. Dad, will you teach me to use your camera? The big one.” His hand slides into mine and I glance at him. My son.

“Look at me?” I kneel so we’re eye level with each other. “I will teach you anything you want to know. Always. And don’t be scared of anyone okay. I will always be there to keep you safe.”

“Okay Dad. I am not scared, I am a superhero and they’re not afraid of anything.” That comment has me laughing, the first full hearted laugh I experienced in a long time. He’s so confident, so full of life. I pull him in for a hug and bask in the feel of my son’s arms around me.

When I straighten, my eyes fall on the woman in the doorway. My mouth gapes and no words come because there aren’t any to describe how beautiful she looks. The color is bold, bright, but it contrasts against her skin perfectly. Her teeth rake against her plump bottom lip and my dick throbs at the sight. “I… uhm… the dress is bright.”

I nod because I still can’t find the words. Her gaze drops to the floor and my eyes travel over her body with slow meticulous precision. The dress is most definitely bright, but the way it hugs her curves makes me think of how badly I would love to rip it off and fuck her mercilessly. “Do I look okay, Flash? You’re not saying anything.”

I shake my head, trying to clear the filthy images looping through my mind. “Yes, the dress, it’s perfect.” Clearing my throat, my gaze trails from the top of her blond hair down to the pink nail polish she’s wearing on her toes. Her feet look incredible in the silver heels, which seem to make her legs longer and look more toned.

My eyes lift to hers, and when she sees my expression, her pouty lips form an O and my mind drops into the gutter which is filled with even filthier images than before.

Clearing my throat for the second time, I lean in and give her a peck on the cheek while whispering in her ear. “My dick is rock hard for you. If we don’t go downstairs now, you’re never leaving this fucking room until I have made you scream so loud the whole City of New Orleans will know my fucking name.”

Her soft whimper is evidence enough that she’s as turned on as I am. I step away and let her shut the door and as she does I catch a glimpse of the ring on her left hand and smile. It looks incredible on her hand.

We make our way downstairs as a family.

There were times growing up that my only family was Luke. He is the one person that has always been there for me and then when I met Ivy, she became my world, and I found a family with my best friend and my girl.

The guests are already seated and as we walk over to the altar, I take in the multitudes of roses which brighten the area. “I need to find my sister.” Ivy whispers. I nod and lead Ben to the camera we set up earlier.

“
B
en
, you see those small blue towels? Can you bring them over?” He nods enthusiastically. I have just set up the tripod, making sure it’s not in the way of any guests because they wanted a short video of Lacey walking down the aisle. The rest will be still shots so I can move around during the ceremony.

“Dad?” I glance down and take the small blue microfiber cloths from him. Wiping both the lenses I will need, I place them on the table to the side of the large flower arrangement. “This is fun. Can I help you all the time?”

“You can. I think you can be my personal assistant and when you’re old enough, we can get you a camera just like mine. What do you say, squirt?”

“Yes, please? I want to take pictures when I’m all grown up.” His smile lights up his face and those blue eyes sparkle with excitement. He’s the most incredible thing in my life, besides my soon to be wife.

“Then you will have to finish school, and while you’re studying, I can show you everything I know.” I ruffle his dirty blonde hair till it sticks in every direction.

“I can do that, Dad.” His bright blue eyes shine up at me and I can’t help smiling at my little man. He’s turned my life around because I never thought I would be good enough to be a father, but seeing him immersed in what he’s doing, something I am teaching him, makes me feel like I can do this.