Shattered by Love (12 page)

As soon as he’s seated, he steeples his fingers above the desk and watches me. This is his intimidation technique, but it doesn’t faze me.

“I am and considering your mother keeps getting arrested, I don’t think my daughter’s reputation will survive being around the likes of you.” This riles me and I lean forward.

“I am not my mother. Since—”

“There is not enough shits for me to give about you or your mother. You will break up with my daughter. And don’t think that is a request, it’s an order. You will break her heart and tell her you no longer want to be with her. Tell her you cheated on her or some shit. If I so much as hear a whisper that you told her about this conversation, I will make your lousy piece of shit life crumble. Do you hear me?”

I stare at him for a long while, not sure what to say because my blood is boiling and my heart is thundering in my ears.

“You can’t just—”

“I can do whatever the fuck I want. You know if you don’t want to leave my daughter, I can make you leave. You and your mother will pay, and that is a promise. I know people in that fucking shit-hole where your mother is that would be happy to do anything for me. If you don’t leave, I will make sure that something gruesome happens to her. Make no mistake, I am not a nice man, and I don’t like you. There is nothing more you can say to change my mind. You are trash and will never be worthy of my daughter.”

“You’re a fucking dick. Do you know what? Your daughter will walk out on you one day and you will die alone. Because both Ivy and Lacey will see you for the monster you are.” My voice booms through his dark office. It’s as dark as his fucking soul.

My body is trembling with anger, and if I had something in my hand, I would have probably killed the fucker.

“Listen here boy, you will do as I say. There is no choice for you. That’s what happens when you’re nothing but trailer trash. Even your father couldn’t stick around long enough.” Just then the door swings open and my beautiful girl is standing there dressed in a midnight blue dress. It offsets her beautiful skin and her long blonde hair flows down her back making her look like an avenging angel.

I have to walk away. I want to fight for her, but I have nothing to give her. I am living off my paycheck from the coffee shop and Luke’s loans he keeps telling me not to repay. And as much as I hate my mother, to know it’s my fault something happened to her is something I can’t live with.

“I am ready.” She gives a tentative smile and I straighten.

“Ivy, I have to work tonight. You need to stay here.” I stalk to the door and shove past her. I am being a brute, but her father is watching and I can’t let her—or him—see me break. As I walk out, I pull the office door closed, but before it clicks, I hear his voice.

“Darling, I think it’s time we talk about your future. That boy is not good for you.” His words stall my footsteps and I hold my breath, waiting for her answer. She’ll disagree with him. I know she will.

“Daddy, he’s not like his mother.”

“Ivy, what is he going to give you?” Moments tick by, and when I don’t hear her voice, I guess she must agree with him. I make my way to the front door and walk out. This is it. I am losing the only girl who ever made me love and there is no way I will let her see me break.

“
I
walked away
because I believed it was best for you and my mother. He threatened to hurt her, Ivy and if I thought for one fucking minute that he wouldn’t follow through on his threat, I…”

My words trail off because as my gaze meets hers, I see the pain she’s been through. “He threatened my mother, me, and you.” Anger burns through my veins as I watch her. “You didn’t fight for me either. So don’t stand there and put all the blame on me.”

Blue eyes blaze with fury. My words were harsh, I realize that, but I couldn’t stop them from falling from my mouth. “Fuck you. You don’t know the whole story, Jayce. You let me walk out, without so much as a fucking explanation. Now I am walking out again, without an explanation.” With that she spins on her heel and leaves me gaping at the closed deep red door.

I
walked out
. I fucking walked out because he was being an asshole. My anger fizzles to the point of nothing when I realize that he’s not the only one to blame, but that doesn’t mean he can just fuck me and expect things to sort themselves out.

It was almost as if he was letting me in, the way I let him in. Into my body, my mind, and into my heart. My mistake. He’s just trying to punish me for keeping his son a secret.

“Baby girl, are you okay?” Turning to my best friend, I swallow the lump in my throat and nod. There is no way I can say anything for fear of the tears that are stinging my eyes.

“Mom, look what uncle Bryce bought me.” Glancing down, I see that Ben has the cape and mask he’s been begging for.

“That’s awesome monster, come here and give me a hug.” Pulling my son in calms me. He smells like pancakes and chocolate and I can only imagine how much he’s eaten. My sweet boy. I hope his father will not leave us again. When Jayce walks into the courtyard, his gaze lands on us. The smile that cracks on that handsome face sends a sliver of hope racing through me.

“Ben.” Jayce’s voice is calm, but the storm in his eyes is palpable. I release my son and he runs up to his father. They’re building a bond, even though the future is uncertain, I can’t keep Ben from his dad, but Jayce lives in LA and I live in Chicago. There is no in between.

He’s still under the impression that my father ruled my life that day, but he needs to know I chose him. Decisions will have to be made and they won’t be easy. “I am heading up. See you later for dinner?” My best friend gives me a reassuring smile. I nod at Bryce and turn to Jayce.

“We need to talk.” I gesture to the door and he knows what I mean because his face falls.

“I know. Not now okay?” He laces his fingers with mine and walks me to the stairs.

“The air needs clearing.” I whisper, glancing at Ben making sure he doesn’t hear me.

“Ivy, I realize that.” He lets Ben down and grasps his hand. “I told you, we will talk, just not right now.” I turn to face him, and my glance settles on Kenna at the door of the bride’s dressing room when Jayce catches my line of sight and his eyes fall on her causing a low groan to rumble in his chest. I know there must be something between them.

“Did you…?”

“Not anymore, Ivy.”

“Anymore? So you did…?” Gesturing with my hand between us as Ben fiddles with his cape. Thankfully he’s not paying attention to our exchange, but I realize deep down, he’s picking up on the tension.

“We did. It’s never been serious.” Something in my gut twists.
Jealousy? Anger?
I have no right to be angry, he was single. It didn’t matter that I didn’t touch another man since he left.

Except for a stupid one-night stand, but Jayce was always the one.

“And here I was saving myself for the day when you walked back into my life.” The venom in my voice is evident. Ice-blue pierces me and I recognize that look, he’s angry, but I don’t care. He can go fuck all the girls he wants. I am done being the sweet little Ivy that he thinks I am.

“Ivy, come on. We weren’t together.” I feel the little hand in mine, and I realize I am doing something I promised myself I never would, fighting in front of Ben.

“Not now. We can finish this later.”

Spinning on my heel, I pull Ben with me as we head up the stairs.

“Ivy.” His voice is a warning, that same tone that always sends heat through my veins and straight to where I need him most, inside me.

“Ben, do you want to watch television while I talk to your dad?” With a small nod, he gives me the same smile that I know will one day break a million hearts.

The one that made me fall in love with his father.

“Mom, are you and dad fighting?” Inquisitive eyes the same shade as his father’s peeps up at me.

“We’re not fighting, but there are some grown-up things we have to talk about. Be good, I will be right outside.” He nods and grabs the remote from me. How a five-year old, well almost, can work a TV remote is beyond me. He spends way too much time with Bryce. When I step back into the hallway, I find Jayce leaning against the railing. His gaze trained on me, arms crossed in front of his chest and I can’t stop noticing how the top he’s wearing hugs his chest deliciously. I leave the door cracked in case Ben needs me.

“So, you’re going to get angry when friends of mine are around?” The smug look on his face boils my blood.

“No, Jayce. I am weary when they’re friends you’ve fucked.” I hiss. With narrowed eyes, he takes in my expression and a smirk tugs on his lips. That incredible mouth that does the most exquisitely dirty things to my body.
Get a hold of yourself, Ivy.

“I always loved how jealous you got, even though I was right here with you, Ivy.” He places his hand on my chest, right where my heart is. The words hang in the air between us and breathing takes effort, leaving me speechless. Love is something I haven’t felt since he walked out, the love I have for my son is different. This, between Jayce and I, its soul searing. Our hearts are intertwined for eternity—to live without that will kill me.

Jay has the strength to hurt me in the most profound way, and I don’t know if I can handle it again. The last time he left me, or let me leave, I only
just
survived. The loneliness left me sliced open wide, flayed with the pain seeping from me in a self pitying ache that never went away, until now.

Breathing, living, just being, was difficult. And when I found out I was pregnant; it killed me a little more because he wasn’t there to see it or experience it.

We’re a part of each other and always will be. Connected, not just because of Ben, but because we are two halves of a whole.

“I love you too. I always have, it’s been a long time since I said that to anyone.”

“Oh? And who was the last person you said it to?” My gaze lifts to his, locking on those ice-blue pools and finding a cocky smile. His hungry gaze scorches my blood. There’s the animal he lets loose on my body and when he takes me, he possesses me. That’s who I see staring back at me; the love of my life.

“You.” He leans in and the heat of his breath tickles my neck. His soft lips brush against the skin below my ear sending tingles down my spine. With a firm grip on my hips, he holds me against him. The ridge of his erection presses against my thigh.

“Well then little, Firefly. Since you love me so much, I think we should play a game tonight because I remember how much you enjoyed those. And when that pussy is soaking wet and aching for my cock to fuck you, when you’re begging and pleading for your release, I will love you and give it to you.”

His crude words have my clit throbbing. The need for him to touch me, taste me, fuck me, is unbearable and I want to have him bend me over right here on the balcony. Not caring who sees us, but I can’t. We can’t. We’re meant to be responsible parents. Two can play his game and he knows it, he’s goading me.

Turning my head, I graze his earlobe with my teeth, tugging on it, eliciting a growl. “Flash, you know how fucking wet you make me? You have my panties soaked, with the memory of you tasting me. Tonight, when we play, I want you to take me and possess me like you always do because tonight you will lose control and when you come, it will be deep inside me.”

Stepping back, out of his grasp, I offer him a small smile and turn to my room, but before I step inside, I glance at him and give him a cheeky wink. I know that’s earned me a spanking I will never forget. I want the animal loose, and I want him loose on me. I want him to show me the pain and pleasure I crave. That my body craves.

Even before I can close the room door, a hand stops it. A quick glance and my eyes stare into stormy blue ones. The fire that blazes in them have my body responding in a primal way. A low gruff whisper, the timbre of his voice is dripping lust. “That tight little cunt will be mine tonight, and every night after. Don’t you dare forget what I can do to your body and when I am done, you will never leave me again.”

With a dark smirk, he turns and walks off leaving me in stunned silence. As the door shuts, I inhale a deep breath, trying to steady my nerves. After tonight we will need to have a serious talk.

How will he react to the thought of me wanting to live in Chicago? Does he want me in LA? We haven’t spoken about the future yet, but I know that he wants Ben in his life. So that begs the question. Will he uproot his life? Or do I uproot mine?

My body is humming with an ache that only he can sate. I crave the dark delight inside him. I hope we can get back to that, to what we were. If not, I don’t think I will survive.