Shattered Heart (The Hart Series) (37 page)

“But you did
plan on telling me, right?  You weren’t trying to keep the baby away from me?”

I guess he has
every right to feel this way, especially after what I just confessed.  Even so,
I’m startled by his thoughts.  “Why would you even think that?”

“It’s just…maybe
you’re worried that I won’t be a good Dad or…maybe you think I’ll fuck
everything up like my Dad did.  It’s not like I have the best role model when
it comes to parenting.”

“Actually you
do…”  He lifts his head, looking over my shoulder, confused.  “Your Mom and
Nana.” 

“I love you so
much.”  The emotion laced within Alex’s words when he rests his head and
settles his hands over my belly, has me tearing up.  I’m not sure if he’s
talking to me or the baby and I don’t care because my family is complete and
for the first time in months I’m hopeful we can make it through anything.

Sunday, December 09, 2012

The smell of
bacon and maple syrup wafts through the room causing my stomach to growl and my
eyes to flicker open.  I squint against the rays of sunlight and stretch
against the warm sheets.  Before sitting up, I pull the blanket around my
breasts and watch Alex setting the table for breakfast.

Walking around
naked doesn’t seem to sit well with my barely awake body, so when I step out of
bed, I wrap the blanket around me and am practically blinded by all the silver
lidded plates.  But not as much as the view I’m seeing of Alex in only his
boxer briefs with the sprawling city as the backdrop.  That vision stops me in
my tracks.  When he notices my company he quickly comes over, brushes his lips
across my forehead and ushers me by hand, leading me to the table. 

“Everything
smells delicious, Alex.” 

He lifts the
lids, showcasing all the food he ordered: bacon, pancakes, crepes, fruit and
muffins.  “I think there should be enough for you and the baby.” 

“Okay, maybe if
we were having octuplets.  You do realize we’re only having one, right?” I
joke, my eyes wide at the overabundance of food.

“Well, you said
this was the first time you haven’t been queasy since you found out, so I
figured you needed to make up for what you’ve lost.”

“You’re gonna
make me a fat-ass, Alex.  Then where will we be?”

“No way that’s
gonna happen.  I plan on working out that tight ass body of yours as often as I
can.  Sex is considered cardio, so it will balance itself out,” he chuckles at
my attempt to slap his arm.

Considering
where our relationship was just the day before, it’s nice to be able to sit and
enjoy breakfast with the man I love.  His dimples are prominent when he chews
and for some reason I love watching him eat.  I love everything about the man
sitting in front of me.

“So, what’s
next?” Alex questions, scooping a fork full of pancake into his mouth.

Just as I’m
about to take a bite of my new favorite meal, banana crepes, I ask, “Next?”  I
think being pregnant has advantages if I get to eat like this every morning. 

“When we get
back, are you going to move in with me?” 

I immediately
stop chewing and study his face for a sign that he’s messing with me. 
Nope,
he’s not.  Shit.
  “You’re serious aren’t you?” 

“As a heart
attack.  How am I supposed to keep an eye on my girls if you aren’t with me?”

“Still convinced
we’re having a girl, huh?”  Alex nods, shoveling another bite into his mouth. 
At work he seems so grown up, but sitting in his boxers, eating breakfast, he
seems so young.  “Don’t you think that’s a little sudden?  We just got back
together.”

“A little sudden
would be me asking you to marry me, which I intend to do the moment I know
you’ll say yes.”  What he doesn’t realize is that I would probably say yes now,
with a long engagement of course, but it wouldn’t be right to try and explain
that to him.  Not right now, when we are just getting back on track.

“Alex…I don’t
know.”

“What’s causing
the hesitation?  Give me the list because you know I’ll have an answer that
will beat each excuse.  You know I have more than enough room.  When the baby
comes, there’s no way in hell you and the baby will be sleeping miles away from
me.  You can save your money and go back to school like you’ve always wanted.”

“What about
work?  What are we going to tell everyone if we live together?”

“Out of
everything I said you’re concern is work?  Easy.  I’ll switch departments and
then it won’t matter if we’re together.  Or quit…then I can keep you knocked up
and in my bed all day,” Alex jokes, raising his eyebrows suggestively at me.

“You’d like that
wouldn’t you.  Me locked up in your house, pregnant and naked just waiting for
you.”

“That would be
heaven.”  Alex leans over and kisses my lips.  “I want you happy.  So whatever
that is, as long as it’s with me, I’ll give it to you.”

I fidget with
the blanket and think about his offer.  I never considered taking this next
step so quickly, but I can honestly say it doesn’t scare me as much as it
should.  We’ve already crossed the point of no return. 

“You sure this
is what you want?  Because in a few months I’m barely going to fit through a
door.  I’ll probably cry at every commercial, have crazy mood swings.  After we
take this step, there’s no looking back, no do over.  Are you sure that’s what
you want?”  I bite my lower lip, looking at Alex with apprehension.  I don’t
want him making a rush decision just because he knows we’re having a baby. 

“Why wouldn’t I
be sure?”  Alex reaches over grabbing the ketchup and dousing his hashbrowns.

“How do you eat
like
that
and still look like
that
?”  I point to his abs.

“I’m a growing
boy.  Don’t change the subject.” 

“It’s just that
I don’t want you to feel pressured into this decision.  Nothing has to change
just because I’m pregnant.”

“Do you want to
live with me?  Simple question.  Because honestly, there are so many positives
when I think about living together.  I think about going to bed with you every
night, waking up with you every morning.  Cooking for you.  Taking care of
you.  Making love to you whenever I damn well please.  I don’t see a down side
to this decision.  Regardless of the baby, I’d want you with me.  LJ just makes
this more exciting.”

The man
definitely has a way of making his proposition more enticing than it already
was.  I may regret this one day, and I hope I don’t, but I want him.  I want
this life.  I want everything he can give me, so the only way I can answer him
is by saying, “Okay.”

“Just okay?  You
can do better than that.” 

“Yes!  Of
course!  Hell ya!”  I scream.  Alex rushes towards me taking me into his arms. 
The taste of Alex along with the sweet maple syrup is enough to complete my
breakfast. 

“Hart, I’m going
to make you deliriously happy.”  Kissing me, he pulls away the sheet wrapped
around me, and throws me over his shoulder.  Heading to the bathroom, he
suggests, “How about I start now?”  I giggle all the way there, already
incredibly happy.

~~~~~

“Hey sleepy
head, we’re home.”  Alex lulls me awake, brushing a strand of my hair behind my
ear.  My head is resting in his lap when the taxi comes to a stop in front of
my apartment.  I didn’t realize how exhausted I was after spending a few fun
filled hours with Alex this morning before we hopped on a plane back to Vegas. 
And yes, I mean that kind of fun.

Grinning from
ear to ear, I stretch lazily in the seat.  Knowing exactly what I’m recalling,
Alex returns my smile right before leaning down to place a swift kiss on my
lips.  “It’s not fair how tired I am, when you look all,” I wave my hand around
in the air, “You know…you.” 

Alex chuckles
from my ramblings, but chooses not to respond.  Probably wise, seeing as if he
went down the same road my mind is on, we may never get inside.  Instead, he
slips money into the hands of the driver before getting out to retrieve our
bags from the trunk, leaving me to exit the car sleepily. 

Warm enough for
both the plane and the bitterness of Las Vegas weather in December, I’m
comfortable in pink leggings and an oversized white sweater.  I’m thankful I
was prepared enough to bring an extra set of traveling clothes or right now I’d
be freezing my ass off. 

“Geez woman,
what in the world did you bring with you.”  Alex’s biceps strain against the
sleeve of his dark blue t-shirt as we head towards my apartment. 

“I wouldn’t
start complaining now, Mr. James.  In a few months I’m going to blow up like a
balloon.  If you think that is heavy, how are you going to lift me and do all
those crazy positions if you’re complaining now?” I joke.  Well, kind of.

Alex swoops me
into his arms after dropping the luggage to the floor with a large thump.  I
scream in delight when Alex kisses me, his tongue exploring my mouth.  I could
live in his warmth for the rest of my life and it would never be enough.  He is
my home. 

The sound of a
throat clearing wrenches us from a lighthearted moment.  I break away from our
kiss and look up to see Alex’s eyes instantly darken in anger.  I’m not sure I
want to see who has put the look of death in his eyes, but know it’s
pointless.  Slowly, I turn to look at our interruption. 

My mouth drops
open in shock.  If seeing Oliver sitting on the steps of my apartment,
expression looking equally as troubled doesn’t bring me back to reality, I
don’t know what in this lifetime will.  I know he knows about me and Alex, or I
should say, he knows about my previous relationship with Alex, but this is so
far from how I wanted to end the weekend.

With his
possessive arm wrapped snuggly around me, fingers digging into my skin, I
barely acknowledge that Alex has lowered me to the ground.  Did I mention I was
in shock?

“Oliver, what are
you doing here?” I question, desperately trying to figure out what to do while
I look between the two of them.  Although Alex’s arm is around me, I grasp his
forearm to remind him he needs to stay where he is instead of pouncing in
Oliver’s direction.

“I knew your
plane arrived and figured I’d catch you at home.  Maybe take you to dinner
since our trip was ruined by some overbearing asshole with a God complex.”  I
groan internally and briefly close my eyes the moment Oliver throws verbal
punches in Alex’s direction.

“Oliver…”

He tosses a
bouquet of flowers on my doorstep and begins to walk towards us.  “I thought
you were smart enough not to fall for his bullshit.  People like him don’t
change.  He’s not going to be the man you need in life.  But that’s on you if
you want to deal with his need to stick his dick into everything that walks.  I
just thought you finally realized you deserve someone who knows how special you
are.  But, I’m the asshole, because apparently you haven’t.”

I can feel Alex
tense behind me before he pushes against my back; I grip his arm even tighter. 
“You don’t know me.  You know nothing about me.  You’re basing these
assumptions on what?  The fact that I fucked your fiancée years ago!  I did you
a favor.  She was a whore, she never told me she was with someone.”

“She was wearing
an engagement ring, asshole!”  Oliver lunges forward, standing right in front
of me; their noses practically touching.  I push against their chests and look
to Alex hoping he remembers I’m between them.  Oliver grabs my wrist forcing me
to look at him.  “For once, just consider something other than falling for the
asshole.  First Cole, now this dickhead.  Can’t you see that I’m the right
choice?  I’ve never hurt you and I never will.”

Tears pool in my
eyes, but only because I know he’s right.  I know Oliver is the smart choice,
he’s the safe choice.  I love Oliver, but unfortunately, my heart doesn’t want
the safety.  It doesn’t want smart.  It wants the never ending love of a man
that is my gravity.  I can’t fight against the instant pull I feel when I’m
around him.  I won’t fight.

Instantly, Alex
pulls me behind him.  “You’ve said your peace.  She made her decision.  Respect
it and walk away.”  Alex steps forward, leaving him and Oliver toe to toe. 
Alex is at least an inch taller and definitely bulkier, but the look on
Oliver’s face shows a determination that won’t give in to any of Alex’s
attempts at intimidation.

“I haven’t heard
her yet.  All I keep hearing is you running your trap, making decisions for her. 
You haven’t given her a chance to breathe, let alone make a decision for
herself.  If you would have let us go on the trip, I’m positive that she would
have made a different choice.”

A rumble erupts
from Alex’s chest and he reacts, pushing Oliver forward.  I grip his bicep and
push myself in his way, stopping him from attacking.  I know stepping in front
of them isn’t the smartest idea.  I know Oliver is right, he would never hurt
me, and it’s at this opportune moment that I dredge up the memory that Alex has
hurt me.  Physically.  The day that Alex not only beat up Cole within an inch
of his pride, he also pushed me.  Being pushed to the ground isn’t my idea of
fun.