Size Matters (2 page)

CHAPTER
Two

E
LI AUGUSTINE
rode through the quiet suburban streets of Kenville in his patrol car, but he wasn’t paying attention to anything going on around him, which wasn’t the best thing for a police offer to admit. He couldn’t get Bryn out of his head. Every curve of her body, the taste of her skin, the most perfect pink nipples he’d ever seen. He loved the way she’d arched into him when he flicked one with his tongue. The adorable little moan she’d released, as if she’d just taken a bite of luscious chocolate cake. Several times he’d had to stop himself from pulling her to him and just fucking her.

There’d been desire in her gorgeous green eyes. She’d wanted him, too, even though she seemed pretty nervous. He thought he’d taken it slow, but he’d screwed up anyway. God, this was all so damn confusing. He didn’t know the rules for dating a widowed woman. How do you date someone whose last relationship ended so tragically?

It’s a whole different world from divorce. Divorce he knew. All too well. And it was far different from having the one you loved ripped away. He’d been completely happy to be rid of his ex and her misery and belittlement. Nothing he’d ever done was right in her eyes.

When he met Bryn, she seemed to need someone to talk to, and he was happy to be that person for her. That first day at their kids’ school, they’d been so busy talking and laughing that they burned the first batch of hot dogs. The PTA president and sixty-five hungry fourth-graders were pretty pissed about it, but they’d fought through their laughter and finished their grilling duties.

After that, they’d met for coffee and talked. A lot. And laughed a lot, too. Being with her made him happy. Coffee dates turned into dinners. And since his daughter, Amelia, and Jaxson were already friends, it was only natural to get together with the kids, too.

He remembered the first time he’d kissed her. Even though they had gone out many times for casual dates, this one in particular felt different. Maybe it was the way she’d tossed her hair, or the way she’d smiled at him, but he picked up on some flirtatious vibes. Or at least he’d hoped that’s what it was. So when he walked her to the door, his heart pounding like he was fourteen and about to have his first kiss ever, he took a chance and leaned in. It was soft and simple, but he was addicted.

From the beginning he’d wanted more, but he knew they needed to take it slow. She’d told him about Johnny and he respected the fact that she wasn’t ready to start dating. It was all supposed to be casual. Even the sex part. But that didn’t stop his heart from wanting much more than that.

After last night it seemed as if they’d jumped backward ten steps. This sucked.

Eli noticed a motorist pulled over on the side of the road, kneeling next to the tire. Better stop.

He turned on his lights and pulled up behind the car. “Need some help?”

“Yeah,” the young kid said, and stood. “It’s my mom’s car and I have no friggin’ clue what to do.”

“It’s okay. I’ll show you.”

Eli helped him get the tire off and put the spare on. During the process, he couldn’t help but think about the last time he’d changed a flat. He and then-wife Kristen had been on their way to meet friends for dinner. So of course, because it was a date to meet her friends, he’d let the flat tire happen on purpose. He should have known and fixed the problem beforehand. Like he could predict running over a random piece of sharp metal. Changing a tire is a huge pain in the ass, especially when there’s a woman standing overhead yelling the entire time.

She’d complained all night about the grease spot on his pants and made sure everyone knew it was his fault they were late. Dinner was miserable, just like the last few years of their marriage. How had they made it through without severely maiming each other? It had been a relief to sign those papers and have some peace.

It was hard to believe he’d had two years of peace already. It had been a nice break, but he was ready to find someone. He liked being married, just not to such a controlling bitch. His brother had set him up once and he’d dated a few other women, but there was always something missing. And the ex wasn’t exactly helping. She loved to give little jabs, usually through their kids.

Eli watched the guy tighten the last bolt. “Make sure you get this to a mechanic soon. They might be able to patch up the flat for you.”

“Thanks.” The kid reached out for a handshake.

“Happy to help.”

The kid pulled away and Eli went back to his patrol car, flipping off his lights. He reached for his cell phone. A missed call from the ex. Better call her back. He’d learned it was best to return her calls sooner rather than later. There was at least a chance that she might be pleasant if not made to wait.

“It’s about time,” she barked, no greeting.

“I’m on duty and I was helping a kid change a tire.”

“I never know when you’re working. And since when is that a cop’s responsibility?”

“It’s not. But being a police officer, as well as a decent human being, I thought it was the right thing to do.”

“Whatever. The kids said you went out with that Bryn woman again last night.”

“Yeah. And?”

“This woman spends time with my children. I should have some say in who you date.”

“No. You don’t.” He could picture her on the phone, hand on her hip, overdyed hair done to perfection, fake breasts hanging out of a low-cut top. And of course that ever-present sneer. “I date who I want.”

“How do I know you’re not bringing some psycho into our kids’ lives?”

There already was one. “You need to trust my judgment.”

“I stopped trusting you a long time ago.”

“Well, you’ll just have to get over it then. I’m not clearing my dates with you. Is there anything else? I need to get back to work.”

“Pick the kids up by four on Friday. I have a date and I need time to get ready.”

“Fine. Anything else?”

“Nope.” And the line went dead.

So much for trying to keep a civil relationship for the kids’ sake.

BRYN SIPPED
her soda, then took another bite of her panini. The lull in shop traffic after the lunch hour rush gave the ladies a chance to eat and brainstorm about upcoming promotional events.

“I’d like to do an overhaul of our Web site,” Penny said. Marketing guru and Jill-of-all-trades, she was a huge asset to Classy ’n’ Sassy. “We made some small changes a few months ago with the launch of the new lines, but now that the shop is profiting again, I think we should allot some cash for a sparkly new Web site.”

“I agree,” said Mia. “We need to update our social network pages, too. I think we need to work on posting on them more often.”

“I’m on top of it. There’s a site we can use to plan postings ahead of time. I can take half an hour once a week and have a whole week’s worth of promo queued up. But we need to be on every day, too. People like to talk with us. I think the models should have their own accounts; that way customers can interact with them after the meet and greets.”

Bryn thought back to that first promotional party and how nervous they’d all been. It was only three months ago, but so much had happened since. Such a crazy idea it had been—taking hot guys with nice penises, molding them, and mass producing their members as playthings for women. It was insane, but the risk had been a huge success. The toys came out great and the launch party had been a blast. Their two models had handled their fans perfectly, smiling and posing for photos, and they’d sold almost every last dildo.

“I don’t know. That sounds kind of creepy,” Mia said, pulling Bryn from her thoughts. “I don’t like the idea of Oliver interacting with strange women. You never know when one’s gonna go nutty on us.”

“Well, he’s almost done being a Classy ’n’ Sassy model anyway, so we wouldn’t do one for him. It would be for Logan and whoever replaces Oliver.”

Mia was so lucky—she’d found the love of her life during this whole experiment. And boy, did he have a great penis. Not that Bryn had ever seen the real thing, but Oliver’s dildo was mighty nice. Logan’s, too. They were very different, but equally awesome. The plan for one signature toy had been thrown out the window when they couldn’t decide between the two men. So they’d molded both. Two dicks were better than one, right? And if they could profit on the men attached to said dicks, why not?

“I think Penny’s on to something,” Bryn added. “It’s kind of like being a celebrity. As long as we don’t use their last names, I think it could work well.”

“Okay, now that that’s settled, we need to talk about the lingerie fashion show at Club Paradise. This is going to be huge. The entire gay community in Newford will be introduced to us.”

In addition to gaining all kinds of female fans with this new endeavor, Classy ’n’ Sassy had also attracted some male attention, including Gilles, the flamboyant owner of the city’s most popular gay club. Together they’d dreamed up a fun night of sexy fashion, sure to benefit both parties.

“I think this is exactly what we need to take the shop to the next level,” Bryn said. “Make it a place for all people to shop, regardless of gender or orientation, and still keep the ideals we built the shop on. We’ll still be classy and sassy, but now we’ll cater to more than just women.”

“Sounds perfect to me,” Mia added.

“Great!” Penny tapped away at the computer and turned the screen to her bosses. “Gilles and I chatted a few times, and here’s one of the ideas he had for a theme. What do you think?”

Bryn looked at the monitor, which displayed a typical summer theme, tropical and beachy. “Boring. I expected something far more interesting than that.”

Penny frowned. “Then you won’t be very enthused with the other ideas. We’ve got a pirate adventure and disco.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. I didn’t know what to say to those, so I played up the tropical theme.”

“That’s not going to work. We need something more innovative than that. What kind of stuff are we modeling in the show?”

“Neon is big this year, so there’s a lot of that. And bold prints.” Mia handed Bryn the catalogue, pages marked with Post-it notes.

Bryn flipped through. “Everything’s very eighties-nineties retro.”

“That could work,” Penny said. “The music would be great and we could do a lot with décor.”

“That would be really fun.”

“I don’t know.” Miss Classy Mia had to add her two cents. “We don’t want this going off into lame territory. That’s why disco is off the table.”

“Yeah, but these decades are still too new to be lame. And we’ll keep it chic. I’m thinking New York nightclub, not a Wham! video.”

“Okay, I see where you’re going with this. Eighties, but not cheesy. This could work.” Mia jotted a few notes. “And we really need this to work. We’ve put so much money into the new men’s line, we need it to sell.”

Worrywart Mia. Bryn wasn’t entirely worry free, she was just better at hiding it. “I know it’ll be a success. It will be a fabulous night and the next day we’ll sell so much product we’ll need to rush order new stock.”

“I hope you’re right.”

After lunch, Penny left to call Gilles and see what he thought of the new theme. A customer came in and Mia went to help her with a bra fitting, which left Bryn at the counter cleaning up, until the phone rang.

“Classy ’n’ Sassy. This is Bryn. How can I help you?”

“Just the woman I wanted to talk to.”

She knew the voice instantly. “Hey, Eli. How are you?”

“Good,” he said. “How are you?”

Did this simple exchange feel as awkward to him as it did her? “Um. Fine.”

“I can’t stop thinking about you.” Apparently not.

“Me, too.” It wasn’t a lie, per se, but she hadn’t been thinking of him in the way he’d obviously been thinking of her.

“When can I see you again?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Listen, I know last night was tough for you. I can’t imagine how hard this is. But I want you to know I can wait as long as you need. I really like you and I know it’ll happen. When you’re really ready, it will be amazing.”

Well, didn’t that just make her want him even more? She couldn’t stop the smile forming on her lips. “Thank you.”

Bryn noticed Mia at the counter, pulling some tissue paper to wrap bras for her customer. She locked eyes with Bryn, all smiles, and mouthed “Who is that?”

“Eli,” Bryn mouthed back. Why all of a sudden did she feel like a giddy teenager?

“Can we go out tonight?” he asked. “No pressure for anything more than dinner.”

“I don’t know. I’m not sure I can get a sitter on such short notice.”

Mia’s smile beamed at Bryn, her head bobbing up and down. “I’ll do it,” she whispered.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!”

Bryn turned her attention back to Eli. “Okay. I guess I have a sitter for tonight.”

“Great. Can I pick you up at seven?”

“Yeah. That’s perfect.”

Bryn hung up the phone. This felt nice. No pressure. Just dinner. But why all of a sudden were her panties a little wet?

CHAPTER
Three

B
RYN PUT
the finishing touches on her makeup and went to flip through her closet for the third time. Nothing jumped out at her. Maybe she needed to go shopping and get some date clothes. It had been an eternity since she needed something sexy for a night on the town. And she wanted to look sexy for Eli.

When they’d first started seeing each other, it was purely friendship. He was easy to talk to and it didn’t take long for her to open up to him about things she only talked to Mia about. How lost she’d been after Johnny’s death, how scared she was to be a single parent. She was terrified of screwing up her kids. He helped her realize she was stronger than she thought and offered to help in any way he could.

And of course, his flirting felt nice, too. At first she felt guilty for liking it. What would Johnny think? She knew Eli wanted more, but respected her need to go slow. She wasn’t sure she was ready to date seriously, but after that first sweet kiss on her front porch, she knew she was falling fast for this guy.

She settled on an emerald dress that showed off her cleavage. It was old, but had only been worn a couple of times. At least it was a silhouette that never went out of style. Some jewelry and a squirt of body spray and she was ready.

Eli was right on time, and when she opened the door, he leaned in to peck her cheek, instantly warming at his touch. “You look gorgeous.”

And hot damn, did he look amazing, too. Black pants and a button-down shirt, rolled at the sleeves, but still tucked in and neat. The perfect combination of dressy and casual. And sexy as hell.

Had she ever noticed before how blue his eyes were? Or how adorable he was when he smiled?

She shook herself out of the hotness fog. “Thanks. I just need to grab my purse.”

They climbed into his SUV and she just could not stop looking at him. Even the way his hair was styled was sexy. Messy, yet tame. And that sly little smile, surrounded by a light shadow of stubble, made her hornier with every glimpse.

A glass of wine later, Bryn didn’t care what the hell kind of food the waiter laid in front of her. She was too busy watching Eli, the candle on the table illuminating his features. Why hadn’t she realized before just how freaking sexy he was? The smile did it for her. A crooked little devilish grin where just the left side rose. And that laugh, too. So. Damn. Sexy.

He reached across the table and took her hand in his, the jolt of electricity traveling straight to her core. Check, please?

Bryn forced herself to eat the pasta dish she’d ordered. It was good, but so not what she was craving. She wanted Eli, naked, pressing into her, hands, lips, and tongue on her body, until she was dizzy with orgasmic rush.

“Would you like to see the dessert menu?” the waiter asked.

“No,” Bryn said at the same time Eli said, “Yes.”

She met his gaze trying to cover her goofy grin. His eyebrow raised and he knew exactly what was on her mind.

He turned back to the waiter. “I think we’re all set. Just the check, please.”

As they walked out of the restaurant, even just his hand on her lower back was almost too much to bear. The clothing needed to be gone. She needed his naked body.

“Do you want to go to my place?” he asked.

She wanted to say yes, but it was just too far away. It would be a good forty-five minutes before they were naked. That wasn’t soon enough.

“Luxury Inn is right down the street.”

He looked shocked. “Yeah?”

“Oh yeah.” She entwined her hand with his and led him toward the sidewalk.

Bryn found herself walking faster than normal, but Eli kept up with her. Within five minutes they were at the front desk of the hotel. She’d never in her life walked into a hotel without a reservation. Or luggage. The young girl at the desk had to know why they were there. It occurred to Bryn to feel embarrassed, but all it took was one look at Eli and his I-wanna-fuck-you-right-here-and-now gaze and she wanted to beg the receptionist to hurry it up.

As she clutched the key card, the elevator ride felt like an eternity. And the hallway felt even longer. Did they have the very last room on the whole damn floor? Finally at the door, Eli pushed aside her blond locks and placed a sizzling kiss on the nape of her neck. Bryn tried to slide the card correctly into the slot but the red light on the door kept illuminating.
I need green, damn it!

Finally he took it from her and did it perfectly the first time, his mouth nuzzling her ear as they stepped into the room. “If I saw one more red light I might have stripped you right there in the hallway.”

A fresh flow of moisture soaked her panties. And this foreign room, with not one reminder of anything else in her life, made her so ready for a night of hot sex with Eli.

The door barely closed, his hand already had the zipper of her dress down, his lips kissing a trail down her spine. Man, did she love that! She pulled her arms out of the dress and let it fall to the floor, spinning to face him, her lips to his. She wanted that lovely tongue in her mouth.

As they stood there, making out like horny teenagers, Bryn unbuttoned his shirt and rubbed her hands up and down his chest, manly hairs rough against her fingertips. But she needed more. She needed that powerful chest pressed against her bare breasts. Bryn inched toward the bed and he followed. She sat down, breaking their lip connection, but she was all too happy to sit there and watch him slip his shirt off his shoulders and move on to his belt. So. Freaking. Hot.

Bryn scooted back and relaxed on a pillow, enjoying her private strip show. He kept his boxer briefs on and crawled to her, stopping to yank one side of her panties away from her hip, placing his lips where the silky fabric had been. He continued placing hot kisses across her skin before completely removing her underwear and pressing another kiss right at the center of her heat.

Oh yes. Straight for the good stuff. But it could wait. Bryn needed so much more. She needed his body on hers, his moans in her ear. She needed him inside her and she couldn’t wait any longer.

“I want you,” Bryn said, and pulled at his arms. “Now.”

He crawled to her and kissed her deep, his tongue mingling with hers. Her legs wrapped tight around him, Bryn’s hands traveled down his back and, without a second of hesitation, slipped inside his briefs. Such a nice, firm ass. She couldn’t wait to feel it in her hands as he thrust into her, muscles tensing with every movement.

Bryn pushed the cotton boxer briefs off of him.

“Wait,” Eli said, and pulled away.

“I can’t.” Bryn lifted off the bed and put her lips back on his.

But he pulled away again, even further. He sat back, Bryn’s legs still splayed wide open. She closed them and sat up, suddenly very cold and very aware of how naked she was. And a little bit scared.

“Is something wrong?”

“No . . . yes. I don’t know. I guess.”

Which was it? “Okay. Just tell me what’s going on.”

“It’s not easy to say.” He shifted on the bed, turning his gaze away from her. “It’s embarrassing.”

“Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s no big deal. We’re adults here. Just tell me.” She’d never seen him look so terrified or vulnerable. She wanted to hug him.

He looked back to her. “This is really hard to say, but I feel like I have to . . . warn you.”

Oh shit. That sounded bad. What could he need to warn her about? Oh, God, does he have some sort of disease? Or maybe a deformity? He’s not a man at all and has a robotic dick?

“Just spit it out,” Bryn tried to say as casually as possible, but she needed to know. Immediately.

“Well. I just want to let you know . . . Before we get too far into this . . .”

Enough of the suspense. Just say it!

“It’s not very big.”

“What are you talking about?”

“My”—he motioned to his crotch—“thing. It’s smaller than average.”

“Um. Okay.” Why was he telling her this?

“I know how weird it is to warn you about it, but it was an issue for my ex. So I just thought I should tell you so you’re not disappointed.”

What the fuck do I say to that?
“It’s okay. I won’t be disappointed.”

“Okay.” He crawled back to her and put his lips where they had been just before his grand announcement.

Bryn tried to get back into the mood. As he kissed her, she envisioned that manly chest and the solid ass she’d squeezed. The sexy stubble and the I-wanna-fuck-you gaze. But the confession had completely weirded her out and she dried up like Nana’s fruitcake. Never in her life had she heard of a man warning a woman about his penis size. Who did that?

Eli moved from her mouth to her chest, pulling at her satin bra, suckling at her nipple, but it didn’t arouse her in the slightest. She was cold and wanted a pair of comfy pants and a glass of wine. Sex was the furthest thing from her mind now. But how would she get out of it without him thinking it was the size issue? She could make something up. But that was wrong. Right?

“I don’t know if we should do this.”

He raised his head, and his face looked like a child who’d had his lollipop taken away. “Why?”

“It’s not you. Please believe me. I just, um . . . I’m not feeling it anymore.”

“Really? Are you sure?”

She hated what she was doing to the poor guy, but she wasn’t about to have sex with him just to save his pride. Not if she wasn’t into it. “I’m sorry. I just can’t.”

“Okay. We’ll have more opportunities.” He stretched and placed a simple peck on her lips. “Do you want to stay and hang out or just go home?”

“I think I should go home.”

His lips said “Okay,” but he clearly wasn’t happy about it. A mix of disappointment and unease colored his features. Bryn really did feel horrible about stopping everything, but it was his own fault. If he’d kept his mouth shut about the small-penis thing, they would have been having fun right now instead of leaving and feeling awkward.

As she stepped into her dress, Bryn couldn’t help but wonder yet again why he felt the need to say it. His ex must have done a number on him. Poor guy. Bryn wasn’t sure she had the energy to deal with all her own insecurities and his as well.

Maybe his interruption had been for the best.

ELI DROPPED
Bryn off and headed for home. That had been one big fucking disaster. They’d hardly talked the entire ride. He’d been dying to know what was going on inside her head. Why had she stopped like that? They’d been so into it, so damn horny. She’d wanted his dick inside her so bad she’d practically begged for it.

But then he’d opened his mouth. He didn’t take Bryn for the kind of woman who cared about the size of a man’s cock, but she did make her living selling dildos the size of his forearm. Maybe that’s why he felt the need to warn her. Let her know he wasn’t anything like what she sold in her store. So she wouldn’t be let down.

Someday he’d get Kristen’s degrading words about his size out of his head. The bitch had always known how to make him feel like complete shit. If she wasn’t ridiculing his “corny attempts” at romance, she was complaining about how boring sex was during the rare times they did it. “Because of your small, ya know . . . thing.”

Nothing he did was good enough, in the bedroom or in the rest of his life. She’d even complained about his parenting skills when he didn’t do things to her exact specifications. If the lawyer would’ve let her, he’s sure the divorce papers would have stated “sorry excuse for a husband and father” as the reason for dissolving their marriage.

But he thought Bryn was different. No, he knew she was different. There was something between them. They’d clicked from day one. He knew he’d have to take it slow, but he wanted to be the one to help her heal. He wanted to show her the kind of man he could be. Hopefully she could forget this night and start fresh. He’d show her, small dick or not, that he could be the man she needed in every way.