Stardancer (Tellaran Series) (12 page)

“I did not think you would break your vow to me,” he said, his voice reproving now.

She looked away.

“And, I confess,” he continued his voice gentler, “I did not think you so artless as to leave without proper dress or escort.”

“So, basically, I can’t go anywhere unless you come with me.”

“Or a guard. I will choose some for you.”

“I bet they’ll all look like Malm.”

“No.” His glance ran over her. “But they will have bound mates of their own. You will not go about unguarded, even in the upper city.  I
will
see you safe.”

She folded her arms. “And these guards, they’ll tell you where I go and what I do.”

He gave a nod. “But you will tell me also, should I ask. There will be no secrets between us.”

“And will you tell me where you go and what you do?”

He inclined his head. “Of course.”

“Because I’ll ask you, you know.” It didn’t come out nearly as acidly as she’d intended.

“I am pleased that you care so for me.”

“It’s not because I care! I just think it would be fair if you have to report in too.”

“Ah, well, then it pleases me that you wish to be fair.”

She scowled. “As long as we’re being so honest here, I want to see my crew.” 

He raised his eyebrows. 

“Okay, fine, I want to see the Tellarans.”

“You will see them. But not today. If you suffer any punishment for your disobedience that will be it.”

“You mean you would have taken me to see them if I hadn’t pulled that stunt yesterday.”

“Yes. But not now. You have been seen at the Circle and others mark you as my mate. Your behavior must be proper and I do not think it will be so.”

“But what if I promise to behave, will you take me then?” 

“No.”

Kinara’s nostrils flared. “I guess you just like to hear me beg, huh?”

He caught her chin, tilting her face to look at him. “I do not do this to hurt you,
Cy’atta
. I believe you would keep your promise. But you would behave well for a Tellaran, not an Az-kye. You know so little of our ways that you make mistakes that we cannot afford if I am to keep my word. The Elders can destroy a clan if they are affronted. You do not know even how to speak to others or whom to address or when. No Az-kye woman would have acted as you did at the Circle and begged her mate not to fight.”

“I didn’t mean to embarrass you,” she said tightly.

“I did not feel shamed,
Cy’atta
.” His dark eyes were soft. He lightly touched her hair again. “You gave me more strength to fight for you than you can ever know.” He gave a half-smile. “I fear the Elders will not see in your ways what I do, my mate.” 

“But the Tellarans are yours, aren’t they? How does
my
behavior have anything to do with it?”

“It has more to do with it than you understand.” He stood. “I must attend to the ship’s running. You are to remain in our quarters. When my duty allows I will visit the Tellarans and be sure they are well.”

She shook her head, rising too. “What do you mean, ‘the ship’s running’? You’re injured. You can’t go on duty!”

“I must. Malm commanded here but now another must be chosen. Until that is done, I command.”

“
He
was the commander?”

Aidar nodded. 

“He’s dead,” she whispered, clasping her hands together. Grim satisfaction swept through her. The man who ordered her brother’s death was dead. She’d seen it happen. 

Oh, stars, it was horrible. 

But it was
done
. It hadn’t been Aidar’s intention but he’d avenged her brother.

“He’s dead,” she repeated. “My brother’s spirit can rest.” 

His brow creased.

“Don’t you understand?” she whispered. “The man who destroyed the
Reliant
is dead. My brother’s murderer is dead. And I can go on now.”  

Her heart felt lighter than it had been in months. Suddenly she remembered the surprise in those beautiful dark eyes when she reached for him in the Circle. How since the moment they became mated he touched her as if she were as precious and fragile as Apovian crystal, how he held her, teased her, risked his life to protect her . . .

She smiled and impulsively reached for his hand, wrapping her fingers around his. 

His hand felt clammy in hers and she frowned at his pallor. “You don’t look well, Aidar. You need to stay here and rest.”

“No,” he said hoarsely, drawing his hand away. “We will arrive at the Imperial world tomorrow. I must attend to my duties.”

“Okay.” She gave him a shy smile. “I’ll be here when you get back.” 

He searched her face then cupped her cheek in his broad palm and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. “I will return to you as soon as I am able,
Cy’atta
.”

Their night arrival on the Imperial world was a quiet one. 

When their shuttle landed at Aidar’s estate it was too dark to see anything but the outline of the house. 

It had taken hours for Aidar to finish his duties on the
Ty’pran
and hand over command to another and Kinara had been stuck in their quarters with nothing to occupy her. It was so late when they arrived planetside she could do little more than look around, feeling irritable and tired as Aidar led her to their apartments, their footsteps echoing on the polished wood floors of the silent house.

She had seen a few warriors here and there but otherwise the house seemed to be deserted. There was food waiting but Kinara was really too sleepy to eat. After Aidar had left to attend to more of his duties she fell asleep alone in the big bed.

When next she opened her eyes it was morning and for a moment she didn’t know where she was. She turned her head and seeing Aidar sleeping beside her, she smiled. She hadn’t even heard him come in. She resisted the impulse to smooth his hair back lest she wake him.

She glanced at the mark over his ribs. That healing salve was amazing. His wounds had healed remarkably and he seemed very proud of the scars he’d earned for her.

Kinara slipped out of bed quietly and wrapped a robe around herself. She eased the door of the balcony open and stepped outside. The blue sky had a tinge of lavender to it and to the north snow capped mountains rose in the distance. 

The city itself made her eyes widen in wonder. 

Located near a river, the Empress’ City was ancient beyond written history. Every inch seemed covered with tile and glass and the morning light of Az-kye’s sun set the city to a blaze of sparkling colors. Beyond the golden spires of the Imperial Palace the powerful spray from the falls rose a half a kilometer high and split the sunlight into a curtain of constantly shifting rainbows.

A high wall separated this estate from the city proper. On the grounds below were probably the loveliest gardens she had ever seen. Carefully tended and orderly, and the perfumes of many foreign flowers made her smile.

She gasped as strong arms went around her.

Aidar kissed her neck and pressed his cheek against hers, his body warm against her back. “Does it please you?”

“Oh, Aidar, the city is beautiful! And the garden! Is it yours?”

His arms tightened around her. “No, it is yours.”

She smiled.  

“It pleases me when you look so at me.”

Kinara blushed, turning her face away quickly. “Will you take me to see my crew today?”

He pressed a kiss to her temple. “You will see them,
Cy’atta
,” he said, letting her go. “But not now. There is much I must attend to this day.”

Kinara stood at the balcony looking out over the city as he dressed in warrior black. She was restless but she knew she didn’t dare go out by herself. She wanted to see the gardens, the city, everything.

He lingered over kissing her goodbye and paused at the door. “I will send the
gisel
to you.”

“
Gisel
?  Wait, what’s a—?”

But he was already gone.

“Well, whatever it is, he’s sending me one,” she muttered. Kinara went back to the balcony, savoring the feel of sunlight on her face again. 

Looking out over the city her mood darkened. Was this going to be her life? Waiting around as a prisoner in these rooms until Aidar returned?

She sighed. She made her promise. As long as Aidar kept his, she would keep her own.

What Kyndan or her father would say about her accepting this man as a husband didn’t bear thinking about. Having been born and reared in the Fleet’s traditions they would both agree that the crew came first. Although she was no true Commander she was responsible for the people she had bullied, persuaded, and browbeaten into coming with her. 

Secretly, she had hoped something would stop her. Something to prevent getting a crew, or maybe being caught at the shipyards, anything so she could have said to herself,
I tried to do it, but it was wrong and someone stepped in before it was too late
. 

But it was too late; her father hadn’t known of her plans, her brother was dead, and Tedah had helped her.

Kyndan would laugh at her when she would ask him,
I knew all this beforehand, so why didn’t I know it was going to be a mistake?

Because, little sister, that’s not how life works!
 

The door opened. Several women entered.

This must be the
gisel
that Aidar had sent. But what was it? She looked to see what the women carried, half-expecting them to reveal some barbaric device, but they held only soft, dark bundles. The women’s clothing was brightly colored and sparkling with decoration, each gown finely crafted and embroidered. 

They approached gracefully on slippered feet to stand before Kinara.  Her first thought was that they were lovely. Each was softly rounded, neither too thin nor too plump, their dark hair shiny. Their skin, ranging from pale to golden brown, was smooth, unblemished, and glowing with good health.

Her second was wondering why Aidar would want
her
when he had women like these to choose from.

They were looking back at her with open curiosity and some of them were out and out staring.

It’s my starblasted hair. That’s what they’re looking at.

One of the girls leaned forward, peering at Kinara’s face.

Right, and my eyes. I wonder if any of them have seen a Tellaran up close before.

Kinara cleared her throat but the women made no move.

So, what are we supposed to do? Stand here all day?
 

She smiled hesitantly and one of the younger women giggled. 

Kinara’s smile froze and one of the older women, gray streaking her hair, shot the girl a look to silence her. 

After an embarrassingly long time, the older woman stepped forward.

“I am Laric. Our lord has sent us to you.”

“But who is your—” Kinara broke off, blushing.
Good way to get them on your side, Kinara, show ’em your smarts.
“Of course. Aidar of the Az’anti.”

“He thought our lady . . .” The woman trailed off, her expression mortified and Kinara realized the woman didn’t know her name.

“Kinara of the Maere,” she supplied.

Laric gave her a grateful look and continued, “Our lady Kinara of the Az’anti would prefer other clothing.”

Kinara blinked at the casual dropping of her last name. Laric waved two of the women forward and opened the bundles they carried.

Dresses! Richly decorated dresses in jewel colors. Laric held up one after the other and it slowly dawned on her that Laric was waiting for her to choose one.

But Kinara knew nothing of dresses. She had spent all her life in coveralls. 

“I—Laric, which would you suggest?”

The woman’s attentive gaze turned to her. “For what occasion, my lady?”

Kinara shrugged, blushing. “To, uh, please Aidar of the Az’anti.”

Laric nodded as if this were most serious thing in the universe. “I would suggest the blue to complement my lady’s eyes.”

“All right.” Kinara reached for the offered dress but stopped at the look on Laric’s face.

“My lady wishes to inspect the dress?”

“Uh, no.  I’m sure it’s fine.”

“My lady wishes to wear this dress?”

Kinara nodded, her cheeks hot.
Is she making fun of me?

“Yes, I wish to wear that dress,” Kinara said sharply. “And I’d like to wear it now!”

Kinara started as the women instantly crowded around her. She drew her breath in sharply as one woman pulled her robe away but before she could cover herself or even protest another woman slid a fine blue shift over her head. 

Kinara hadn’t had someone dress her since she was a little girl, and having strange Az-kye women handle her like this was utterly disconcerting. They worked quickly and efficiently but by the time the third layer had gone over her head Kinara was overwhelmed and shifting uncomfortably. The women responded by working faster and soon the woman who had giggled was standing before her to tie the blue ribbons at the bodice.

At last they stepped away and Kinara let her breath out in relief.  The folds of the dress reached to her ankles and felt strange, heavy and confining. She took a few experimental steps before she was sure she could manage it.

Kinara’s cheeks were burning. “Thank you,” she said stiffly.

Laric signaled to two women to come forward. “Will my lady choose slippers?”

Kinara’s brow creased as the women uncovered dozens of pairs. 

Laric helped her select jewels, cosmetics, and a scent. After an hour of fussing she couldn’t take any more. She pointedly ignored Laric’s hints to allow one of the women to dress her hair. The most she could stand to have the woman do was slide a jeweled comb in to hold the hair out of her eyes.

Kinara followed Laric to the mirror and stared at her own reflection.  She hardly recognized herself. Every inch of her seemed to twinkle with precious jewels. She smiled.

“My lady is pleased?”

“Yeah, I look . . . I look
great
. Thanks.” Kinara turned to Laric. “I want to go see my crew now.”

Laric tilted her head. “Crew?”

“Sorry.” Kinara shook her head. “I want to go see the Tellarans.”

Laric’s brow furrowed.  “Does my lady mean . . . go unescorted?”

Kinara opened her mouth to speak and abruptly shut it. Aidar hadn’t rescinded the “stay in our quarters” order yet and also hadn’t said anything about those guards she was supposed to have.
He
wasn’t here and it was barely two days since she’d blundered into almost getting him killed. 

“No,” Kinara mumbled. “No, of course not. Guess I’ll stay right here.” She sighed inwardly.
Probably all day.

There was an awkward pause then Laric said, “We often have tea and a light meal at this time.”

“Oh,” Kinara said with a nod. “I like tea.”

The women were looking at her expectantly.

Kinara gave a half shrug. “That sounds good.” 

They didn’t move.

She frowned. “Do you want me to go get it?”

The women started in surprise then laughed.  But they didn’t seem to be laughing
at
her.

She hoped.

Laric shook her head, smiling, and waved to two of the younger women. “Sella, Metari, go you now.”

The other women took up places around the room.  Some took out musical instruments and began to play. Others took out embroidery or began putting away the other clothing.

Kinara glanced at Laric. “Is this what they do?”

Laric tilted her head. “Do you ask them to do something else, my lady?”

“No, no,” Kinara said quickly, flushing. “I’m just—no.”

Not sure what she was supposed to do and fearful of doing something wrong Kinara perched herself on one of the couches, trying not to wrinkle her dress. They didn’t offer her any of their work, not that she knew how to do any of it anyway, so she just sat and watched them.

The younger women returned with tea, fruit, and baked things already cut to bite size.

Sella looked surprised when she took up a plate and exchanged glances with Laric as Kinara quickly chose some things from the platter. She shifted on the couch. Looked like she’d managed to mess up just trying to get breakfast.

Any Tellaran knowledge of Az-kye etiquette was scant at best and she’d skimmed all of it. She studied these people with the goal of attacking and destroying a warship, not sitting with their women and taking tea.

One of the younger women caught her eye and smiled, her face warm and open. How different the women were from the men! Where Aidar and the warriors she had seen seemed sometimes to be carved from stone, these women were warm and friendly.