Stricken Desire (18 page)

“Yeah tell me about it. Try growing up
checking out those hot men and not knowing why you find them
appealing and when you’re in the locker room you catch yourself
looking around desperately for a glimpse of anyone’s cock. But just
so you know not that this matters. I don’t always bottom. It’s
about fifty-fifty for me. The cock sucking thing. If I want my cock
sucked I have a woman do it, rarely do I let a man unless he begs
for it. I just find that women believe it or not, do it better.
They’re more sensual about it. Men just want to do it rough and
firm and I don’t like that. I won’t lie and tell you I haven’t
sucked a guy off myself. I have especially Kyle and since him maybe
two or three men. But most guys I run into are gay and they want a
gay man not a bi man. So I stick to chicks who could care
less.”

Wow that was too much TMI. I guess I wanted
to know those things deep down. But there goes my very handsome
best friend laying it all out on the table and I can’t scrub this
imagine of him sucking on Kyle’s cock out of my head. It’s not a
good imagine either. I hated Kyle. Ok, I never hated him but he did
me. So in turn I didn’t like him. I guess that’s how things work
when you’re a teenager.

“Do you miss Kyle?” I ask without even
thinking. I am such a moron.

“Honestly? Yes. A lot sometimes. The
friendship part you take care of completely but that half gay man
inside of me really wants to be in his arms again. I know he hates
me because the last time we talked he told me he wanted to try and
be together again. Like together, together as in a couple and I
told him to fuck off and that I’m not bi anymore. I said he was
just an experiment gone badly. I was such an asshole but he
wouldn’t stop trying to get me to come back to him. The sex is what
I miss the most. He was my first and that I’ll never forget. I have
a big soft spot for him. What can I say?”

Awe, I think my heart just broke for him.
Even though I couldn’t stand Kyle all those years I can see why he
was so protective of Stacy. He’s gorgeous and I wouldn’t want to
share him either. Especially if I was in love with him as much as
it seems Kyle was or maybe still is.

“You should call him Stace. Tell him the
truth. Tell him what you just told me. Maybe he’s still pining over
you and if he is I can’t imagine how painful that might be. I’m
only two and half weeks out of my pining over a one-night fucking
stand and look where I am?”

He pats me lovingly on the leg.

“I’m sorry babe, I shouldn’t be shoving all
this heavy stuff on you. You did care for Johnathan didn’t you? I
guess it shouldn’t surprise me. I’m sorry.” He wraps his arm around
my shoulder and pulls me into him. I lay my head on his shoulder
with a sigh.

“Yeah the more I think about it. The more I
feel like I was in love for the first time. It only lasted a day.
But I think it might have been the real deal.” I shrug sadly.

“I know babe.” He kisses my forehead.
“Johnathan is handsome and I’ve seen him work his cock. He’s got
skills. And when he gets all emotional in bed I’m sure it tugs at
your soft heart.”

“Yeah.” I exhale. “I just thought when he
said he fell in love with me when he first saw me at in the front
row of the concert. That he was being honest. It felt honest at the
time, I guess. Then when he said I was his and he wanted to be with
me and take care of me. I had to beg him to have sex with me.
Looking back I know it was all a game. But it meant something to
me. Especially when he cried.” I tuck my arm through Stacy’s
resting my hand on his thigh.

“He cried?” he asks softly.

“Yeah. Twice. Almost made me cry too. Like I
said he’s good.” I mutter.

“I know of his game but I’ve never heard
there were ever tears involved. I’ve known him for over four years
and never seen him cry once.”

“Guess he’s upping his game this time.” I
pout. “Okay enough of the heavy for now. I need to shower. I stink.
And you need to get around to go see your mom. I have to hit the
docs and talk to them about my girly shit and then we can meet up
back here for dinner tonight. Sound good?”

“Yep.” He says with a lovely soft smile.
Without a shower still in his Pj’s and he looks like a damn fashion
model.

I stand, mosey into the house, drop my empty
mug in the sink and head straight to the best bathroom in the
entire world. Okay, it might not be the best but its close. My mom
had the bath gutted when I was eight and knocked out a closet next
to it to make room for a bigger bath. Now my parents Victorian has
a glass walled steam shower, claw foot tub, slate tiled flooring
and creamy buttermilk walls. It’s seriously interior design
magazine quality.

I’m in my wonderful suburban alone diving to
my doctor’s appointment with Dr. Shells at one. I turn up the
radio. The only stations my beautiful truck picks up is the local
country stations. I’m not sure if it’s a funny joke or that its
antenna just sucks. I leave my windows hang open. I got to finally
wear something Non rock and roll today. Thanks to being back in
hickville U.S.A. It’s okay to wear a floral knee length A-line
dress to the docs. I even opted out of heels and went for white
flip-flops. Bettysville is too small to house any doctors offices
except a small at home vet right outside of town. So I’m driving
ten miles to Wayfort where my doctor’s office is located next to
the only hospital within a forty mile radius. Wayfort is the hub of
all the surrounding country towns. It’s a city of about thirty five
thousand. Has the only Walmart around and a small mall. It’s the
best you’ll get unless you want to drive two hours to Fort
Wayne.

I pull up outside, leave my widows down and
my doors unlocked. Something I wouldn’t ever do in a larger city.
But here it’s doesn’t matter. No one is going to steal your
stuff.

“Hey Emily.” Mary, the receptionist waves
with a smile when I come in. I don’t sign in. They know me by name
because my mom happens to work next door for Dr. Botkins and Dr.
Larson both pediatricians. Dr. Botkins was my doc when I was a kid
and Dr. Ted Larson is what we all like to call Dr. Hot pants. He’s
thirty five and sexy as hell and he’s single. My mom tried to set
me up on a blind date with him once but I backed out last minute. I
didn’t think it would be right to go on a date with a pediatrician
considering my body can’t have babies and it would be like rubbing
it in both of our faces. I explained it to my mom as gently as
possible and she understood and even apologized for being so
inconsiderate. Like I always say I have the best mom on the
planet.

“Come on back Emily.” Nurse Linda a full
figured brunette in her forties says with a big over-the-top
friendly smile. I’ve known Linda since I was sixteen when I first
starting coming to the gyno. Even though I wasn’t sexually active
yet my mom wanted to introduce to the world of womanly functions
and with my periods being irregular since I first started she
thought it might be best to get checked out. That was when I first
found out I have endometriosis and a tilted uterus.

I follow Linda back to one of the five exam
rooms. Todays the day I get to be naked. I go inside after I get
weighed which I never watch. I don’t care to know how much I weigh.
I am small and freaking out about ten pounds gained or lost will
just make me worry more. My mouth is suddenly dry. I need some
water.

I go into the exam room and sit down on the
table. Linda takes my vitals and here comes the wonderful part.

“When was your last menstrual period?”

“Eight months ago.”

“When was the last time you had
intercourse?”

“Two weeks ago”

“How many sexual partners have you have in
the last month?”

“One.”

“How many partners in the past year?”

“One”

“How many in your lifetime?”

“Two.”

“Are you on any kind of birth control?”

“No. I don’t have sex much and I can’t get
pregnant.”

It’s like a running ticker tape. Question
after question. She fires one off and fire right back. It’s kind of
embarrassing in some cases but I’ve only ever been with two people
I guess that’s something to be proud of at twenty four. The last
question finally comes after ten more.

“Do you have any questions or concerns for
the doctor?”

“Yes.”

She looks at me like I need to move forward
and tell her what I need to discuss.

“I will discuss it with him once he arrives.”
I say sweetly.

“Ok.” She stands up and carries the laptop in
her hand that she was just entering my answers into.

“Please take all your clothes including you
underwear off and put the gown on and drape yourself with the sheet
and the doctor will be with you shortly.”

I nod and she leaves.

I strip quickly. It’s freezing in this
office. My nipples are instantly hard and sore. I sling on the blue
and white gown opening to the front like always. Prop my cold naked
butt onto the paper that’s lining the table and drape the white
sheet over my legs for warmth.

Thank god my doc is old enough to be a
dinosaur or I would feel so wrong being this naked. Okay, he’s not
that old but he’s not a spring chicken. He’s handsome and rather
built for a doctor. He has a full head of salt and pepper hair and
his eyes are icy blue. He always smells so good like cigars and
peppermint and there is no doubt that he was sexy in his youth and
now he’s just handsome. To me at least. I am sure his girlfriend or
wife or whatever would say he’s sexy but I’m sure he’s about fifty
five and that’s way too old for me to comment on in that
department.

A knock

“Can I come in?” I hear Dr. Shell say and he
slowly opens the door.

He smiles at me and puts out his hand for me
to shake. “Emily it feels like it’s been forever. How are you?”
He’s so charismatic.

“I’m good doc and yourself?”

“Good. Good.” He offers another warming
smile. “So what brings you in today?” he stands next to the
instruments laid out for my annual.

“I came to get my annual I am little behind
and I’m sure you’ll need to do a STD work up.” I say confidently.
Even though I am anything but.

“Oh? Have you been having unprotected sex?”
his eyebrow rises surprised.

“Yes, stupidly I did about two and half weeks
ago well it’s closer to three weeks now but I did and only that one
time.”

He doesn’t need to know it was four times
that night. That’s too much information. But it was once. Just one
full night.

“Ok, I’ll do the whole workup. I should get
the blood results back in a week and the other’s I can do in office
and let you know before you leave.”

“Sound great.” I smile.

He does the typical run down like every year.
Checks my breasts for lumps, feels around my abdomen which is
always tender thanks to my endo. But he’s always gentle. Does my
vitals again. Then I put my heels up in stirrups and the
uncomfortable part begins. He shines a light at my crotch and
inserts that uncomfortable and cold instrument to check me. I get
scraped and prodded. Once he’s done I get up he leaves the nurse
comes in draws three vials of blood and hands me a cup to pee in. I
go into the bath and pee and I come back and now I am sitting again
in the room fully dressed. Awaiting my results.

Twenty minutes pass and another knock at the
door. This time he doesn’t hesitate and he just walks in.

“Well Emily. Have you been experiencing any
kind of problems lately?” he asks looking over my few results.

“Not really why? What’s wrong?” I frown.

His face is serious but it’s not worried.
He’s not giving anything away.

“Do you itch or burn when you pee?” he
asks.

“Oh god no.” I shake my head and cover my
mouth with my hand. “Is that what I am supposed to be feeling?
Something is wrong isn’t it?”

“So no symptoms, nothing out of the ordinary
at all?”

“I feel a little crampy, my breasts are
tender, I’m thirsty and I could probably eat a cow the past two
days. But it might be PMS. Even though I don’t have regular cycles
I do have PMS occasionally and god knows that lately I’ve been
going through a lot of stress but no burning or itching.”

He leans over and hands me a booklet. ‘Your
pregnancy.’ I look at him and back at the purple booklet.

“Is this a joke or something?” I am so not
laughing.

“No. But you are pregnant.” He says with a
straight face.

“WHAT!” I screech. “I’ve been told for years
I can’t have babies and now I get pregnant after a one-night stand.
Are you shitting me?”

I’m warm and I am so angry. This cannot be
happening to me! I can’t be pregnant. I’ve been told for the past
eight years I have a less than ten percent chance of conceiving
normally and with the way my condition has progressed my doc has
went to say that I have even less than five percent because of my
irregular periods and tilted uterus. This is ridiculous! They must
have switched the tests.

“I know, we seriously thought that you
couldn’t that’s what makes this so rare.”

I shake my head back and forth trying to
clear my very fucked overly stuffed head.

“You’re sure I am pregnant? You didn’t switch
my urine with someone else’s?”

He nods “I’m sure and I will roll in the
ultrasound machine now and we can see the baby if you want to make
sure everything looks good. You can’t be far along but we can see
something.” He says.

“I’m only three weeks I had sex three weeks
ago and that was the last and only time. You can see a baby at
three weeks?”

“Yes and it’s not three weeks it’s classified
as five because that’s why the egg must have dropped and set you
into your fertility cycle. Even without bleeding you can drop
eggs.”