Taken Love (8 page)

I WANTED TO stop by and see her, whenever she was in town, while out roaming around with her mother or sister. Or out near the lake with her father or brother, but I knew it wouldn’t be wise. I knew I wouldn’t be welcomed by her, or by her family, and I didn’t want to make her cry again. I was the one who hurt her, and I would never be accepted by any of them again. I married her, and then broke her heart, and that had
user
written all over it, but it was far from the truth. If they only knew how much I loved her, cared for her. I would do anything to just have her smile at me again, to have her kiss me, hold me, and tell me she loved me. If she only knew how much my life still revolved around her. I ached for her, but I didn’t deserve her. I craved her, but couldn’t taste her. I needed her, but did I even stand a chance of ever regaining her, or her family’s trust again? As long as
she
didn’t accept me, they wouldn’t either. I really didn’t want to ruin the little breaks, she or I had from school, so I stayed hidden, and secretly watched whenever she was in town.

She had been on autopilot for the last four years, after she left me, and I was racked with guilt and anger at myself.  She was right, I didn’t deserve her. I hurt her badly, and she was ruined. I ruined the only woman I’ll ever truly loved, and it hurt me, just as much as it was hurting her. I threw myself into my schooling, and company start up, with her always in mind. I wanted to make it up to her. I wanted her to still be proud of me, like she used to be, when I had nothing to show for it. But I hurt her, and that would haunt me until the day she loved me, again. By the time she reached her fourth year at Columbia, I had reached my fourth year at Yale as well. It was a very hard year with all the pressures I was under, whether in work or school, but I stayed focused and determined to succeed. With finals, and both of our graduations approaching, my company was up and running. I had my trust fund access granted early, from an early certified letter of confirmed graduation from the Dean at Yale. P2 Enterprises was now a cooperation, and I was a young CEO, with a demanding schedule that could rival that of the vice president. P2 Enterprises started in the basement of my uncle’s house three years ago, right after I’d completed my first year of college. With a small dedicated staff of five, we were working very hard, and learning as we went. Most of the staff were associates from Yale, who were just as driven like as myself to succeed. Starting out, I had three clients, who came with a strong recommendation, and agreed to a trial basis of my services, courtesy of my uncle. He had his own small firm in finances. They was a small firm, but
official
in their position in money management. Those three clients saw my passion and desire to succeed, and stayed with me, not returning to my uncle. They referred other clients they knew, and the cycle continued to repeat itself. By that second year, we had several contracts, and had secured potential revenues for future gains for those clients. I did my job, and I did it well, and with my impending degree in business and finance, I knew I would be successful.

After the Ponzi schemes began circulation all over the media, people didn’t really know who they could trust. As a result, small startup firms were given chances to prove themselves, and I intended to capitalize on that, with every client that came my way. We were always preparing to move and expand, and we eventually did. Our hard work was paying off, because in nearly two years of being a company, P2 Enterprises was now International. Once I secured our office space, and employee agreements from those who started with me, it was really time to join the big leagues, and move into an applicable office space.

I would normally hold my business meetings at my uncle’s office’s, or a conference center, even though most of our clients preferred video chat, but it was time now. I delayed the process of getting an office space, until I felt we were really ready as a company, to do so. It’s hard gaining respect, clients, and even harder for the international markets to trust you with their capital. I was always a go getter, and with a little persuasion and incentive, I believed that there was truly no limit to what you can do in this life. We started very small, learning the ins and outs of starting a company from the ground up. Also figuring out what we wanted to offer as a firm, to build clientele. Building relationships with the right people was essential, and after that first year we were on our way, my dream was coming true. I learned that the most important thing to do, is to start working towards your dreams. Most people have dreams, ones they think about every single day, but continue to do nothing about it. If you don’t try, and keep trying, those dreams die, and then you’re filled with regret for the rest of your life. Look at my dream, it was coming into fruition. Three clients had turned into thirty, then thirty had turned into sixty, all in that first year of being opened for business.

Four years later, and I’m still working hard every second of my days, with the same drive I had in the first days on the job. I was always working, when I wasn’t thinking or obsessing about KP. The client list continued to grow, giving us the numbers, as well as the connections to show for it.
‘Quality over quantity’
was our motto, and people loved what we stood for. So much so, that in a matter of the last several months, my client list almost doubled, and that’s when the real revenue started to come in. I was still in my last year of college, and building my global empire in the process. I always stayed focused on the big picture, and the payoff was incredible. People were beginning to trust us with even more capital, people’s and their financial future was what my company secured successfully. This catapulted P2 Enterprises into the beginning stages of becoming a Fortune One Hundred company, and we weren’t even fully out of my uncle’s basement yet. The promise to a great life was bull, you had to earn it, and invest in it with all that you had to secure that. That’s what I did in my line of work, I learned what worked, and in that, ninety-five percent of my clients were very happy. Then you have that five percent that don’t trust your advice, and wants you to go another route, and they end up losing at their own hand and expense. My clients entrusted me with various means to invest, buy, and to sell for them, amongst the many more services that P2 Enterprises
now
offered to our clients. There were always more prospective clients lined up here in the USA, and now more people overseas were requesting our help in various ways, so in that alone, I knew there would always be money to be made. Our reputation was steadily climbing the wall of success, and in a cut throat city like New York, that was a compliment in itself. Believe them when they tell you, that if you can make it in New York, you can virtually make it anywhere in the world. You really could, I was living proof. I had now secured my new residency in a plush condo near the new offices. I bought the entire floor which consisted of the two massive apartments that resided there. After graduation, I would be moving to New York full time, but I would keep the condo here in Connecticut. I just couldn't let it go, I didn't want to let it go… not ever.

Kathleen's graduation from Columbia was tomorrow, and my graduation from Yale was the next day. Everything was going as planned, and my team was almost fully assembled for the big move to New York. I was king of my empire, and every king had his queen, and it was time that mine made her way to her throne, and back into my arms. I was hoping that this time apart had calmed her down, and that she would talk to me. I had hoped that she wouldn’t run from me when she saw me the next time, but if she did run, I would run after her. I hoped that she would be proud of what I was doing in my career, and in me graduating from Yale in the next forty-eight hours. I was hoping that she would love the fact that I gave back my trust fund, until I was done with school, and also that I never signed her request for divorce. I hoped and prayed that she would find it in her heart, to forgive me. It was hours from her graduation, and I wanted to surprise her. I wanted to congratulate her on graduating in person, and tell her all about P2 Enterprises. I wanted to see her face to face, and give her a graduation gifts, and hold her in my arms. I didn’t have her followed for most of this last year of school, so I was starved for a glimpse of her now. I didn't want it to be in a photo, a video from a phone, or a hidden video camera. I wanted to see her face to face. I had waited long enough, and it was time to re-claim what was mine. But when my assistant went ahead of me two days before her graduation, to get a lock on her location and routines, he was in for a surprise. She was gone. She had vanished without a trace, without any forwarding address, or phone number.

After further research, he found out she’d chosen to have her degree sent to her parents’ house, and she told the university that she was leaving on assignment for her new job. She opted out of participating in the graduation ceremony. I growled in response, as he repeated what the secretary of admissions had told him, clenching my fists so tight I was ready to punch a wall. He stood there, and continued on, saying that he was also informed that she’d left campus the day prior. “FUCK!!!!!” I yelled. My assistant, Sherman, looked nervous as hell standing in my office, and he should be nervous at this
unacceptable
prognosis. I was in shock, I was livid… and Kathleen was gone.

Two years later

“OH YEAH, BABY, fuck my mouth, hard and nasty.” She growled at me, as she ran her tongue up the length of my cock, teasing me, testing me, wanting me to stuff her mouth again. I took a deep breath, as she slowly took me back into her wet and warm mouth, all the way to the back of her throat again and again, humming her appreciation. I continued to stare out into the late night view of sprinkling lights, the lake, and the surrounding trees, while deep in thought. I stood there, with my whiskey tumbler in one hand, and my other hand tangled in the hair of the woman who was on her knees, sucking my cock. While the city slept, we were on the balcony of the penthouse suite of the Hotel Le Bristol in Paris, while she proceeded to suck me off for the third time tonight. As she did the job she was told to do, I was in deep thought about the last time I was deep inside the throat of another woman.
KP.
I lifted my tumbler glass of scotch, took a long gulp, and swallowed with a hiss, as I felt her throat muscles contracting around my cock. She was good, I was close, and she knew it. I growled, tightening my grip of her hair, as she gutturally moaned around my cock, making me shudder. She was a woman who liked it ruff and dirty. A woman who needed my taste in her mouth. She was a woman who craved my cock, and how it would fill her mouth beyond capacity.

Too bad she wasn’t the woman I needed. Too bad she wasn’t the woman I craved. Too bad that she would never be the woman to
have
me.
I was already taken
. I looked down at her, wishing she was Kathleen. I wished that she were here with me in Paris, sucking my cock on this balcony. But she wasn’t, I had no clue where she was, and the thought has haunted me for years now. I was never able to let her go, and even after two years of only allowing women to only suck me off. I would bask in the fact that I
still
hadn’t had penetrative vaginal sex since her. They were only allowed to suck, that was all I could allow to happen. Even with that, none of them could measure up to her, not in any way. The more I thought about this woman, who was sucking me off, not being the one I actually wanted touching me… I felt my anger flare. I then pulled my cock out of her mouth, and she followed it, as if I was dangling it as bait or candy, desperately needing its flavor. Needing me. “Please, I want too—.”

“Stand up.” I growled at her, and she stood shakily to her feet, and I grabbed her, I pushed her to the wall near the balcony door, facing away from me. I ran my hands all over her dress, teasing her, taunting her, until she was panting. Until she was so charged, that all she needed was just one touch to come. Once I knew she was ready, I touched her over her panties, and she cried out, moments later, she came. She moaned and panted, while trying to reach behind her to touch my cock, but I shielded her once she touched my pants. “Not tonight,” I muttered. I was already over this, and her. I knew I’d rather have my orgasm with Kathleen in mind tonight, versus giving this woman the satisfaction she so desperately wanted.

“Pierce, did I do something wrong?” She turned and looked at me, with soft submissive eyes, and I smirked at her, slowly shaking my head. I knew she didn’t really get why things were this way between us, but I didn’t care, she knew the rules going in. I had been seeing Lydia for a few months here and there, but strictly on a sexual needs basis only. There were no long, drawn out conversations, texting, or extravagant dinners between us. When I wanted her, and she was free, I had her, case closed. She was supposed to be a onetime thing when we first hooked up, but I liked her adaptability and desire to please me. I knew almost immediately that she would be good for more, and she hadn’t proven me wrong yet. She was always clean, accountable, and ready for my call, and even though I hardly
ever
kept any woman on standby, Lydia was the exception… for now.

I had a routine. I’d go out, and pick someone up, and fuck her senseless in my own way, then go on about my life. Most couldn’t handle it. After a few blowjobs, they always assumed they were entitled access to my world in some vast way. Lydia was proving to be no different, although, she was good at keeping her emotions at bay. But lately she would  sometimes  forget  the  rules  that  I  have  in place, and she was beginning to show signs of becoming attached, and I was not having that. She would get upset if she couldn’t see me when she wanted to, or she’d try and do things when we were together, to get a reaction out of me, trying to ignite an emotional connection
. NO!
Which was why she had her own room when we were done, she could no longer sleep at my home with me. The rules were in place to protect all involved, and they would
never
change, no matter what she wanted to happen. At this point, I knew that she would do
anything
I asked, for me to fuck her pussy or her ass, anything at all. She desperately wanted to feel me inside of her when she came, she wanted me to fuck her pussy hard and deep. She wanted me to take her ass, and claim it repeatedly. She was someone who liked it hard and dirty. Taking her body, in any way that I wanted to, was what she dreamt about, it’s what she craved.
But it would never happen.

She knew I was holding back immensely, but she never understood why, it still didn’t stop her from yearning for more. She wanted to be the one I unleashed on, she wanted to be the one I conquered. Giving myself over completely, and fucking her senseless. Sending her into a coma of bliss, taking her, claiming her, tasting her. Unleashed
.
She wanted it bad, and she wanted it yesterday. For someone like her, that was beautiful and wanted by plenty of men, I think my refusals were starting to affect her more as rejections now, rather than how it originally started between us, which was a simple arrangement. She is worldly, smart, with a hungry sexual appetite. She is a beautiful blond, who has a nice body, even though I’ve never seen her naked or touched her bare skin. I always stayed over the clothes, but always made her come a few times, when we were together. I would never touch more than her face with my hands, or her mouth with my cock. I didn’t want to kiss anyone. I didn’t want to taste them, or lay some temporary claim to them. I knew I had some issues, and I knew I was spiraling out of control, with my obsessive need towards one woman.

The woman I’d hurt, the one who left me, heartbroken and ruined, while still being married to her. I never signed those papers, and I would never sign them, ever. If Kathleen wanted to take me to court for all that I had, she would get half automatically, since we were still legally married. But knowing her, she had forgotten me, but I could never forget her, not ever. “You know, Pierce, I don’t think I want to do this this anymore.” Lydia spat at me, and walked inside the suite. I exhaled, and followed her inside, as she grabbed her purse and glared at me.

I knew she wasn’t the problem, I was, and there was nothing I could do about that. If I could change, and open up to another woman, I would have done that by now.
I was ruined.
Not just for her, but to all women who weren’t Kathleen Toth-Chamberlin. It wasn’t a problem of me just not wanting Lydia’s pussy, the problem was that I only wanted
one
woman’s pussy. The one woman, who I still couldn’t find, to save my life. “Pierce, please let me make you feel good.” She moaned, while setting her purse back down, and walking towards me, all her anger from two minutes ago forgotten.

“No, you can go now… I’ll call.” Her smile faded, and her soft eyes had turned cold once again. She went and yanked her purse from my table, heading for the door. I knew she was flustered, but there was nothing I could do about that. She knew coming into this, what was to be expected of me. But I also knew that she wanted more, and that she thought she’d earned her way in, by sexing me with her mouth. I only ever used her mouth, and that was only when, and if I wanted it.

Right now wasn’t one of those times. She reached the door, and turned back towards me, huffing and puffing in anger. “Don’t call me anymore, Pierce, this thing whatever it is… is over.” She stated, and left my room. I grabbed my phone, and deleted her name, number, and all her unanswered text messages. I then went to the bathroom, and took a hot shower, where I jerked off, once again, to the memory of a passionate night with the woman who haunts my life. My wife, KP.

         ***

I took all the frustrations of my week out on the punching bag in my home in Paris, giving that bag all the anxieties and bad news, in the form of my fist connecting, with power and skill. I boxed rather frequently to let off some steam. It was my desired preference when I wasn’t fucking someone’s mouth with my cock. I threw another set  of  punches, while bare chested, with sweat dripping from my chest, my shorts hanging from my hips, as I tried to stay focused on my task at hand. To say that I was bitter, was a serious understatement in all things sexual, and it was because I couldn’t let go of her. The one who consumed my nights, the one who got away before I could grab her again. Kathleen was not heard from, or seen, in over two years now. After she graduated Columbia, she’d vanished, and I had no idea where she went or why. I’d been travelling, and networking P2 Enterprises, the last two years bicoastal, and I never really got to spend a full three weeks at home, not since we became the global enterprise that we are today. With hard work came great rewards, but I still didn’t lose focus of my ultimate goal in life, which was to re-claim what was mine, and her name was Kathleen. I followed her example from Morris High, and created my own operation, one that's been active for over two years now. Operation KP, was my operation to find her, the OKP project was given unlimited access to any of my resources worldwide. I employed four men, with the specific job of tracking her down, alongside Sherman, who was my long-time personal assistant, and their point of contact on the matter. But just like clockwork, they could never find her, and week after week, Sherman came back with, nothing, nadda, zilch. I just didn’t understand how she could vanish like this, it was becoming very unsettling.

I even had a fifth man on watch at her parent’s house, especially around the holidays but to no avail. She didn’t come home for any of the holidays the past two years, and that seemed so odd to me, she was always close to her family.
Why wouldn’t she come home?
There was many times that I wanted to ask them the question, the one I knew they would refused to answer. Why would they give me any answers, when they probably still blamed me for everything that’s happened? That alone, was a very hard pill to swallow. They were a part of her, and I needed them to know the real me. I didn’t want to be misunderstood anymore, by anyone. I wanted to fix things, but I couldn’t fix anything if I couldn’t find her. So, unfortunately, it would seem that having a net worth of millions, and an empire worth almost two billion USD, still couldn’t buy my happiness. Because I still hadn’t secured the one merger I desperately needed in my life. The one I’ve been working so hard to regain, the one I destroyed all those years ago, when I took the advice of my uncle, and lied to the love of my life. The one whose kiss still lingered on my lips, her lips still owned mine. The one whose scent still made me hard, because I kept her perfume on my adjacent pillow. The one who ignited an insatiable desire in me to taste her, which made me crazed with thirst. The memories of her screaming in pleasure, still made me feel more alive than I’d ever felt with anyone else, and then there’s the love. The love she gave me each day was very special to me, it made me feel like I had a family again.
Oh, fuck… I need to find her.