The Amish Millers Get Married BOXED SET Books 1-3 (Amish Romance Book Bundle: The Way Home, The Way Forward, The Narrow Way) (Boxed Set: Amish Millers Get Married) (4 page)

Luke 13:23-24.

And someone said to him, “Lord, will those who are saved be few?” And he said to them,
“Strive to enter through the narrow door. For many, I tell you, will seek to enter and will not be able.

Chapter 7
.

Hannah was now working three mornings a week on a regular basis in Mrs. Hostetler's store. On those days, she visited Rebecca in the hospital in the early afternoons, and then hurried home to help her
mudder
with Martha and Esther.

One afternoon, she visited Rebecca as usual, and on this occasion, a young nurse was talking to Rebecca when Hannah entered the room. The nurse made to leave, but paused at the door and looked back at the two. "Rebecca, you have so many visitors that you'll be sad to go home. You'll miss them, I bet, especially the handsome young men." With that, the nurse winked at Rebecca and then left.

Handsome young men?
Hannah thought. She looked at Rebecca and saw that she was decidedly uncomfortable, squirming in her bed. Then it dawned on her - the young men must be the four Hostetler brothers, Noah, Jacob, Moses, and Elijah. Her stomach churned and the room spun.

"Hannah, you've gone white. Sit down, in my bed or the chair."

Hannah sat on the edge of Rebecca's bed and struggled to control her breathing. After the accident, the psychologist had told her that anxiety can be managed by long, slow breaths.
Four breaths in, hold for two counts, four breaths out,
she silently told herself. Hannah sat for a while, breathing in a controlled manner, and then opened her eyes to see Rebecca peering at her with worry stamped all over her face.

"When," she stammered, "when have they been visiting you?"

"Mostly in the mornings." Rebecca's voice was small and flat. "You always come in the afternoons and they come in the mornings."

Hannah shook her head. She didn’t want to begrudge her sister visitors - she knew only too well what it was like to lie in a hospital bed for weeks. Yet the Hostetlers of all people?

Rebecca broke the silence. "Hannah, it’s not of
Gott's
way to hold anger in your heart. Besides, Noah was the one responsible, not his
bruders
or his
mudder
or his
daed
."

Hannah did not trust herself to speak, so just sat there. Finally she said, "But Rebecca,
Daed
and
Mamm
will be angry when they find out. Whatever will they say? Sure, okay, I can understand the rest of the family, but Noah Hostetler himself visiting you?" She shook her head.

"They won't mind, Hannah." Rebecca's tone was insistent.

Hannah sighed. "Yes, they will most certainly mind if they find out."

"No, they won't. Oh Hannah, I'm not supposed to tell you, but…" Her voice trailed away and Rebecca fidgeted nervously.

"What? Come on, Rebecca, you can't say that and then not tell me."

Rebecca pulled a face and chewed on a fingernail. "
Datt
was going to tell you when the time was right, but, but…" Rebecca took one look at Hannah's face and then continued. "They already know."

"They already know that Noah Hostetler and his family are visiting you?"

Rebecca nodded.

"They do?" Hannah was puzzled. She figured her
daed
would likely be fine with it, but certainly not their
mudder
. Just the mention of the name
Hostetler
was enough to cause their
mudder
to go into a pot banging outburst. Hannah looked at Rebecca and saw that she was still chewing a fingernail. "There's more, isn’t there?"

Rebecca nodded. "I wasn't supposed to say. Don’t be angry, Hannah, but Noah is working for
Datt
."

"Working for
Datt
?" Hannah repeated. "Whatever do you mean?"

"He's working for
Daed
in his furniture store, as a furniture maker."

"Noah Hostettler is making furniture for our
daed
?" Hannah clenched her fists to try to stop the lightheaded sensation that was overtaking her. "But, if he's making furniture rather than selling it in the store, that means he's making at in
Daed's
workshop, at home, near our
haus
."

Hannah stood up and hobbled to the window on her crutches. She looked down at people scurrying this way and that, as if they didn’t have a care in the world. "This means Noah's been there when I've been at home and no one told me," she said aloud, but to herself.

"Come and sit down, Hannah.
Datt
was waiting for the right time to tell you," Rebecca said again.

How could he? How could my own daed keep that from me?
she wondered.
Noah Hostetler, the very one who caused all of us to have injuries for many weeks, and Datt not only forgives him, he gives him a job
. Hannah's whole face was burning; even her ears felt as though they were on fire.

"
Gott
wants us to forgive," Rebecca pressed, but Hannah was in a daze.

Rebecca raised her voice slightly. "Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven."

Hannah gasped. "Rebecca! You must not do that; people will call you
Scripture smart
." Hannah felt a pang of sympathy when she looked at Rebecca's fallen face. "Anyway, you sound like
Daed
," she added in a teasing voice.

Rebecca brightened up.

* * *

Hannah had the taxi stop at her
daed's
workshop rather than at the
haus
as usual. She had not been to the workshop since her accident. The bishop had long ago given Mr. Miller permission to have electricity in his workshop as well as a computer and a phone, due to the fact that the woodworking business was the Millers' sole source of income. Mr. Miller had purchased the small property from
Englischers
after he decided to sell his farm and go into the woodworking business, and while all electrical lines had been pulled out of the
haus
and the barn, electrical lines were allowed to remain to the big building which Mr. Miller was to use as his workshop.

Hannah hobbled to the workshop wondering why she had never seen someone else's buggy at the workshop, but then realized that Noah would have unhitched his horse and left him in the barn with the buggy out the back.

Hannah struggled to push the door open and then made her way inside slowly. Both her
daed
and Noah saw her at the same time. She would have laughed at the shocked and stricken expressions on their faces if this hadn't been such a serious matter: after all, her father had betrayed her by keeping the matter from her.

"
Datt
, can I speak to you for a moment, please?'

Her father hurried over. "Are your sisters all right? Is anything wrong?"

"
Nee
, they’re fine; I just want to talk to you."

Mr. Miller nodded to Noah to continue, and Noah went to the back of the workshop and turned on a noisy piece of equipment, presumably to give Hannah and her
daed
an opportunity to speak without being overhead.

"
Datt
, I heard that Noah is working for you, and has been for some time."

"
Jah
, that's right, he has. I didn't want to tell you until the time was right."

Hannah studied her
daed's
face. He didn’t look remorseful or embarrassed at all. "But what right time? When would that time be?"

Mr. Miller patted her hand. "I was going to tell you when you had forgiven Noah."

"Forgiven!" Hannah said the word loudly and then looked up at Noah, but was sure he hadn't heard her over the noise of the loud equipment.

"
Jah
. Hannah, you know that
Gott
wants you to forgive; you must. Why do you hold such hatred in your heart?"

Tears pricked the corner of Hannah's eyes. "I don’t hate Noah. But how can I forgive him after what he did to me? To my
schweschders
? How can you forgive him,
Datt
?"

"I forgave him through the Grace of
Gott
, and so must you,
dochder
."

Tears were falling from Hannah's eyes now. "But how?"

"Ask
Gott
to help you, child. Many things we cannot do on our own strength, so we have to rest on the strength of
Gott
. Would you like to speak to the bishop?"

"
Nee
,
Datt
!" Hannah struggled to her feet. Why did her
daed
have to bring the bishop into it? Anyone would think that Hannah had committed a sin, when she was the victim. Well, unforgiveness was a sin, she knew that, but how could she forgive? And she had expected her father to be remorseful and apologetic, but instead, he had lectured her.

"I'll go and help
Mamm
with dinner now,
Datt
."

As Hannah made her way to the door, her
daed
called out after her, "Tell your
mudder
that Noah will be coming for dinner tonight."

Hannah froze in her tracks. Things were going from bad to worse. It was like a nightmare and she was unable to wake up.

* * *

Noah had been shocked to see Hannah come through the door to the workshop, demanding to speak to her
daed
. He figured that Hannah must have just found out that he was working for him. She sure did not look pleased about it. And even worse, Mr. Miller had informed Noah that he was to come to dinner. It had been a summons rather than an invitation.

It was bad enough that Noah would have to sit at the same table with Mrs. Miller, who he had no doubt would be shooting angry glances and perhaps even words his way, but he couldn’t bear to see Hannah's accusing eyes on him all the time, not when he harbored such deep feelings for her as he did.

Noah walked outside the workshop and over to Rock. He climbed through the rails to straighten Rock's winter blanket. "Why do you always need your blanket straightened, Rock?" he asked the horse as he gave him a handful of oats. "Is it because you know that I’ll give you a handful of oats when I fix it?"

Noah rubbed Rock's face. "I'm sorry, old boy. It's all my fault you’re like this. I bet you're missing all the attention of being a buggy horse and going out visiting. It's all my fault."

Psalm 34:11.

Come, O children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the Lord.

Chapter 8
.

Hannah stood outside the workshop, her face to the sky. The snowflakes drifted through the icy air and settled on her face. Noah Hostetler was working for her
daed
. How could this be so? She shook her head, scattering the snowflakes.

It was one thing to have to sit through a whole dinner with Noah, but worse still, she would have to be the one to tell her
mudder
that he would be coming for dinner.

Hannah was annoyed with her
daed
for forgiving Noah, and knew that her
mudder
felt the same way. Her
mudder
would be upset that Mr. Miller had invited Noah for dinner, and Hannah was sure that her
mudder
did not approve of the fact that Noah had been working for her
daed
. That was obviously what their recent conversation had been about.

The cold drove Hannah on toward the
haus
, so she made her way carefully, reluctant to face her
mudder
. When Hannah told her that Noah was coming for dinner, her
mudder
simply said with narrowed eyes and pursed lips, "So you know he's been working for your
daed
?"

Hannah nodded.

Her
mudder
thumped around the kitchen, muttering to herself, and banging pots and pans as Hannah had no doubt that she would. Hannah rested her crutches against the wall and balanced herself on her plaster cast, and then busied herself mashing the potatoes. Her
mudder
was still muttering as Hannah added cream cheese to the mashed potatoes, mashed again, and then added butter and sour cream. As she stirred, she remembered the times that she thought she would one day be cooking for Noah, as his
fraa
.

"Hmmpf!" she said aloud, drawing her
mudder's
attention.

"Is your leg hurting, Hannah?"

"
Nee
,
Mamm
." Hannah was embarrassed that she'd let her feelings show to the extent of speaking, or rather, snorting loudly. She had better not speak her thoughts out aloud tonight over the dinner table with Noah there.

Noah! Just the thought of his name made Hannah's knees go weak. Once she had been deeply in love with him, but now… Well, she didn't know what she felt any more. Perhaps old habits died hard. Perhaps what she still felt for Noah was just a habit. It couldn't be love, surely? Not after everything he had done to her and her
familye
. Hannah's eyes fell to her crutches, and set her shoulders square with resolve.
I am not in love with Noah Hostetler
, she told herself.

It seemed to Hannah that Noah came through the door looking quite wary.
And so he should, with Mamm here
, Hannah thought. Noah smiled at her and she smiled back automatically, but then she frowned. His smile always could light her up. And why did her heart flutter every time she saw him?
Oh Gott, please help me not to be so conflicted,
she said silently.

The
familye
and Noah all bowed their heads in silent prayer, and when Hannah opened her eyes, she could almost see the frost that had descended upon the table. It had nothing to do with the weather, and all to do with her
mudder
. Even the delightful aroma of chicken and gravy did nothing to lighten the atmosphere.

Mr. Miller did not seem to notice, and talked as he usually did. He spoke often to Noah, no doubt to put him at ease as Mrs. Miller was avoiding talking to him and often shot glares his way.

"How's Jacob?" Esther piped up.

Noah looked up, seemingly surprised that someone other than Mr. Miller had spoken to him. Hannah felt a momentary pang of sympathy for him.

"He's
gut
,
denki
. He's always asking after you. Please tell me exactly how you are so I can tell him."

Esther smiled widely. "My back's much better now. I'm sitting up for longer and longer and it doesn't hurt much at all now," she gushed. "Soon I’ll be around and about, helping
Mamm
again."

Hannah had suspected that Esther had always been sweet on Jacob, and clearly the accident hadn’t changed that.
Oh well, he wasn’t the one who was driving
, she thought.
Esther can’t hold Jacob accountable for his bruder's sins
.

Hannah saw Esther shoot a glance at their
mudder
. "It would be good if Jacob could visit," Esther added in a nervous voice.

"Esther!" Mrs. Miller's voice was loud and everyone turned to look at her, except for Mr. Miller.

"
Jah
, that's a
gut
idea." Mr. Miller's voice was firm.

Now everyone turned to look at Mr. Miller.

"A
gut
idea," he repeated, with slightly more emphasis. He ignored his
fraa's
glares and continued. "The girls must be bored with just lying around all day and unable to do their chores. Idle hands are no good." Their
daed
looked up. Hannah saw him look at their
mudder's
face and then look back to Noah. 

Mrs. Miller cleared her throat. "Hannah."

Everyone looked at Mrs. Miller and then at Hannah.

"You know that Mary Knepp has taken ill?" Her voice was cold and a little cross.

Hannah wondered at the abrupt change of subject. "
Jah
,
Mamm
. How is she?"

"The
doktor
said it’s a case of the flu and that she has to rest up for a couple weeks."

Hannah made to murmur sympathetically, but her
mudder
cut her off.

"That means there's no one to teach the
kinner
at school."

Hannah was taken aback. "But
Mamm
, I can’t do that."

Mrs. Miller waved her hand through the air. "
Nee
, Hannah," she said sharply. "I don’t mean you should teach them."

Hannah breathed a sigh of relief, but wondered where this conversation was going.

"Beth Yoder will teach them until Mary's well again, but Beth has never taught
kinner
before, and she's asked for your help."

Aha
, Hannah thought,
Beth Yoder, David's mudder. This is all part of Mamm's matchmaking plot. Seems that Beth Yoder might be in it too
. Her heart sank. It was bad enough that she had to deal with her feelings for Noah, whatever they were, but now she had to fend off the unpleasant David Yoder despite her own
mudder
, and now it seemed David's mother, Beth, as well, trying to get them together.

"Hannah?" Her
mudder's
tone was insistent.

"Oh sorry,
Mamm
." Hannah saw that everyone around the table was looking at her, particularly Noah who was staring, waiting for her response.

She licked her lips nervously. "
Mamm
, I can't, really. I visit Rebecca in the hospital every day, and do the chores here as much as I can, and I help Mrs. Hostetler in the store three mornings a week."

"I'm sure Mrs. Hostetler can do without you."

Mr. Miller interrupted. "
Nee
. Hannah is to continue to work for Mrs. Hostetler. It wouldn’t be right to abandon her like that."

Mrs. Miller looked down at the table. "Well then, Hannah, you can help Mrs. Yoder on the other two mornings."

Hannah looked at her
daed
, hoping he would protest, but he remained silent this time.

Mrs. Miller stood up to clear the dishes. "It will only be for a week or two before Mary is well again. You can start next week."

"
Jah
,
Mamm
," Hannah said meekly.

"
Gut
, Beth will be pleased. And I'm sure you're looking forward to seeing David at the Singing this Sunday night."

"David?"
I really should think before I speak
, Hannah thought,
but what can I say to that without getting into trouble? Nothing,
she decided, so said aloud, "
Nee
, Mamm, I am not."

Esther and Martha gasped at Hannah's boldness, but Hannah thought that her
daed's
eyes twinkled. Hannah felt Noah's eyes on her and looked up. He held her gaze until she looked away.

"Can I go to the Singing please,
Mamm
?"

Hannah shot Esther a grateful look. She knew Esther had no desire to go the Singing with her bad back, but was merely deflecting attention away from Hannah.

Mrs. Miller shook her head. "Not yet, Esther, but I'm sure you and Martha will be well enough to go soon enough."

Hannah was in two minds about the Singing. Noah and David would both be there. She couldn't shake the feeling that an awkward situation was looming.

* * *

Noah sighed long and deep to himself as he drove his buggy home in the dark. The dinner had been difficult and strained, and the worst thing of all was that Mrs. Miller was trying to set up his beloved Hannah with David Yoder. Hannah had not appeared keen on the idea, but was she only being coy? Noah had no way of knowing. Being so close to Hannah for an evening had made his heart ache more than ever.