The Boyfriend Experience (4 page)

The man behind him gave one last powerful thrusts and froze inside of him as he pumped his hot cum deep into Nate’s bowels. “Fuck!”

Darren collapsed on top of Nate, both of them breathing heavily as they tried to recover from their intense orgasms. He reached for Nate’s hand, holding it tightly with their fingers entwined. Rolling onto his side, Darren pulled Nate’s back against him and wrapped him in a tight, possessive embrace as they basked in the afterglow of sex.

* * *

It was a while before either man could muster enough brain cells to form any sort of coherent sentence.

“That was…” Nate began, but lost his train of thought when Darren’s fingers began absentmindedly tracing circles on his sweaty chest.

“Amazing? Fantastic?” Darren suggested as he nipped at the back of Nate’s neck. “Mind-blowing?”

“Any and all of the above.” Nate smiled brightly as he turned, reaching his head back to give Darren a soft kiss.

Darren simply deepened the kiss. He asked, after their lips finally parted, “So did I pass the grade?”

“Top of the class, babe,” Nate chuckled as he answered.

“Good.” Darren sighed against Nate’s neck. “Who are you, really? Ethan can’t be your real name.”

“No, it’s not.” Nate replied, staring up at the ceiling as he lay in Darren’s arms.

“So? Who lives in here behind the mask called Ethan?” Darren asked, gentle but insistent, as he tapped Nate’s chest where his heart was with two fingers. “Come on. Please? Tell me your real name.”

Nate sighed. He could tell that Darren was genuinely curious by his tone of voice; there was no malice in his intentions. However, it was a very personal question to ask and Darren really had no right to ask him about it.

Somehow though, Nate didn’t feel like refusing the man’s request.
I must be crazy
, Nate thought to himself. “You do know the point of using a fake name is to maintain the illusion of this whole arrangement, right?”

“Don’t you ever get tired of it, though? Pretending to be someone you’re not, I mean. Pretending to be someone else’s ideal.” Darren propped his head up on his hand, looking down into Nate’s eyes as he brushed a couple strands of stray hair away.

“I’m not allowed to get tired of pretending,” Nate said. It was the reality of his business—he lived and worked for the illusion.

“You don’t have to pretend, you know,” Darren said. “Not with me.”

Nate didn’t answer. Sometimes he wondered if he’d been pretending for too long, to the point where Nathaniel had started to resemble the different versions of Ethan more and more. He could no longer see himself clearly when he looked into a mirror; he couldn’t tell whether it was Nathaniel or Ethan looking back at him.

He shivered at the thought of it.

“I didn’t hire you for the
ideal
.” Darren tightened his arm around Nate. “Back there, at the Rockefeller Plaza—that wasn’t Ethan who dragged me down three blocks in a cab just to look at a Christmas tree. That was
you
, wasn’t it? Whoever
you
are.”

Nate’s breath quickened. How…

“I have tried everything, and it has always ended the same way. I’m done looking for my happily ever after.” Darren let out a long sigh. “All I want right now is something real, with no pretenses, no masks.”

Nate looked over at Darren, and was surprised at the hidden despair he saw in the depth of the man’s dark eyes.

“Can you do that for me?” Darren asked, his voice subdued and quiet. “Can you be real? For me?”

Nate’s heart pounded in his chest. He had heard his share of true confessions from Darren’s kind of people, but none of them had had as strong an effect on him as what Darren had just said.

Darren was baring it all for him to see.

Could he? Could he shed all of his masks and diligence and just be himself?

Would he be able to do it without losing what was left of himself in the process?

“It’s Nathaniel, Nathaniel de Luca.” Nate found himself saying before he could stop the words from tumbling out of his mouth.
Shit
.

“Nathaniel.” A small smile lit up Darren’s face. “I like it.”

Nate shrugged. “Everyone calls me Nate though.”

“You don’t like Nathaniel?”

“Oh, I do. Sounds kind of like a vampire or a werewolf, doesn’t it?” Nate smiled. “But it’s long and everyone spells it wrong. Nate’s simpler.”

“I suppose.” Darren nodded. “So where’s Nathaniel de Luca from, originally?”

“Jersey,” Nate answered truthfully. Now that Darren knew his real name there was no point hiding anything. “You know, you could’ve just hired an investigator if you wanted my background. Even if I was using a fake name it wouldn’t be too hard for them to track that information down.”

“True, but I want to hear your version.” Darren shifted closer to Nate, draping an arm back over Nate’s waist as he pressed light kisses to Nate’s shoulder. “I love a good story.”

“What am I, your personal modern day Scheherazade?” Nate scowled.

“You’re gonna tell me stories for one thousand and one nights?” Darren quipped.

“Maybe, but not tonight,” Nate said with a yawn. He rolled on to his side before sitting up. “This Scheherazade is too tired to tell stories at the moment. You’re gonna have to wait until tomorrow. I’m gonna take a hot shower and pass out for a few hours.”

Darren buried his face into the warm spot Nate had left behind to muffle his chuckles.

“And you can either join me,” Nate tossed out with a wink as he sauntered in all his naked glory towards what looked to be the bathroom, “or you can stay where you are and miss out.”

Chapter 3

“Where did that…” Nate muttered to himself as he shifted through the big closet that took up a good chunk of floor space in his bedroom. Suits and other sophisticated clothing of various colors hung from the rack. “I remember leaving it here after I got it back from the cleaner…”

His phone buzzed in his pocket. “Hello?” he answered without looking at the screen, and let out a frustrated sigh.

“Hey,” the soft baritone of his lover’s voice came through the speaker. “You all right?”

“Hey!” Nate paused what he was doing after hearing Darren’s voice. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just having trouble finding something in my closet.”

“What was it?”

“Nothing,” Nate sighed. “Just my big blue scarf.”

“You mean the thing that looked like you stole it from the Cookie Monster?” Darren laughed. “You left it at my place. It’s in the front hall closet, in the big basket up top.”

“What do you have against my scarf?” Nate pouted. “It’s big, it’s warm, and I like it.”

“Okay…” Nate could practically
hear
Darren’s eyes rolling over the phone. Darren hated that scarf but Nate couldn’t bear to part with it, especially on the colder days. “What’re you doing tonight?”

“The usual,” Nate answered, holding the phone between his ear and shoulder as he picked up random articles of clothing and books off the floor, putting them back where they belonged. “Was thinking about picking up a few things from the market before I head over to your place.”

“Ooh, dinner! Lucky me,” Darren chuckled. “But unfortunately, we’ll have to postpone that until tomorrow?”

“Why?”

“One of my best friends is a photographer and his new exhibit is opening down in SoHo tonight,” Darren said, then paused. He said something indistinct away from the phone before he came back on. “I was thinking… we could grab dinner down that way, then head over to say ‘hi’.”

Darren added before Nate could respond, “I remember you saying you liked photography. I thought I’d be nice to do something different.”

Nate was speechless. He’d only casually mentioned that he enjoyed looking at photographic art when they were chatting one night. He hadn’t thought Darren would remember such a small detail like that.

“So? What do you think?” Darren asked, after a lack of response from Nate. “If you want to just stay in, we could do that too.”

“Yeah, sure!” Nate smiled at Darren’s thoughtfulness. “So where should I meet you?”

“Let’s meet back at my place, say five thirty?” Darren said after a moment.

“Ooh, someone’s getting out of work early for once?”

“Nah.” Darren sighed. “I’m just clocking out early. I’ll be paying for it tonight when we get home.”

“Ouch.” Nate winced. “Why not just leave from work directly?”

“I need to change into something more comfortable. This suit is killing me.”

Nate chuckled. He’d never seen a business man who hated wearing a sharp suit this much. “But you look nice in it. I love a man in a nice suit.”

“Still uncomfortable though.”

“All right, lover boy. I’ll see you at home,” Nate said with a small smile, hanging up.

He sat at the edge of the bed, then let himself fall onto the mattress. The springs creaked as the bed took his weight.

It’d been two weeks since their first “date”, and things had been going pretty well.

Darren was a busy man, running a company that large. He worked long hours, so really, they didn’t spend a whole lot of time during the week. Darren had given him the freedom to do whatever he wanted when he was at work.

“You don’t have to be at my beck and call, you know. Just do whatever you want. Whatever you usually do.” Darren had laughed when Nate had asked Darren what he wanted him to do when he was at work.

On the weekend though, they’d spent practically every moment together, either lounging at Darren’s place or out and about doing something fun.

Like a real couple.

Nate shook his head and reminded himself again that none of this was real. It was never supposed to be. Money changed hands, and he was providing a service. That was all. He might’ve made it look real, but anything between them would’ve still been built on a foundation of money.

His mind wandered back to what Darren had said, and he still couldn’t believe Darren remembered things he'd only casually mentioned. The man was attentive and that alone made him a good lover. Nate was shocked when Darren confessed to him that his past lovers were all more interested in his money than him.

Why would anyone give up someone like Darren? Nate shook his head, baffled.

Sitting up from the bed, he began stuffing things—clothes, mostly, into his duffel. Despite Darren’s busy schedule, Nate had been spending more and more nights at Darren’s place. They didn’t always have sex; sometimes they just cuddled in bed and talked. He wondered if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

He stared at the swirling abstract patterns on his phone’s home screen. It was a week to Christmas, and it felt weird that he wasn’t scrambling to get all of his appointments booked and organized through to the new year. Normally, he’d be trying to schedule in as many clients and gigs as possible this time of the year. The holidays were usually a busy season for someone in his line of work, and the money was always good.

Darren hadn’t said anything about his plans for Christmas, though. Probably going away to spend it with family, Nate thought.

What would he do with a week off if Darren had decided to visit family?

He always visited his aunt at the home for Christmas Eve and sometimes Christmas Day, but aside from that, there really wasn’t much he could do. He’d lost his parents at a young age, and his aunt was the one that raised him. He always made a point of visiting her as much as he could manage, even if she didn’t recognize him anymore because of her illness.

Shaking his head, Nate decided to deal with it when the time came. He had to get going if he was going to be at Darren’s place on time. New York traffic was a bitch during rush hour.

* * *

Darren smiled as he put down his phone, staring out the window. The sun was just about to set, and the skyline of New York City was a haze of indigo and orange.

“So? What did your new ‘boy toy’ say? You guys coming tonight or what?”

“He’s not my boy toy.” Darren rolled his eyes and turned his chair around to face the woman standing at the door of his office. “And yes, we’ll be there.”

“Okay, fine, your new beau. That better?” The woman strolled in, closed the door behind her, then plopped herself down on the visitor’s chair in front of Darren’s desk. She took off her four-inch stilettos and massaged her feet as she continued. “I’ve been wondering when you’d start bringing him around. I’m dying to meet him.”

“Kate…” Darren warned. “Don’t even think about it. It’s only been two weeks.”

“What?” Kate blinked her eyes, fluttering her long lashes innocently. “I didn’t say anything!”

Darren arched an eyebrow and glared at her.

“Oh, fine. I promise I’ll be good.” Kate rolled her eyes. “God, these shoes are killing me.”

“Why do you wear them then?” Darren could never understand women’s obsession with shoes.

“The same reason you hate those shiny suits but still wear them, my dear brother.” Kate put her shoes back on and got up from her seat. “Anyways, I gotta go make sure Kyle’s good to go and not tinkering with something else. You know how he is when he gets into it. I’ll see you later at the Blue Dot.”

“See you tonight.” Darren smiled and watched as his little sister strolled out of the room before letting out a long sigh.

The past two weeks with Nate had been… nothing short of amazing. Nate was incredible in bed. He could get hard just thinking about Nate writhing in his bed, lusting and begging for him.

But the man was so much more than just a good lay. Nate was also funny, witty and surprisingly knowledgeable in a wide variety of areas ranging anywhere from philosophy to pop culture. The man was nothing like the lovers he’d had in the past.

Nate obviously needed money, but Darren could tell that it was more than vanity, more than a selfish need for a plush life. He had, more than once, wanted to ask why Nate was in this line of work, but he felt that it was far too personal. He’d already asked enough of Nate by learning his real name; he didn’t want to push Nate more than that.

Darren sighed, leaning back in his chair. His thoughts whirled around the image of Nate in his mind—the bright smile when he was happy, the witty glow in his eyes when they debated about things, the little gasps he breathed when he became aroused…