The Guide to Getting It On (160 page)

Also, your chances of being accepted by your teammates would probably be better if you were in a sport where there are individual performances, like gymnastics, track or swimming. Your chances would also be better if you played women’s sports, but you didn’t mention having gender issues.

If you do come out, you might need to deal with some of your teammates’ concerns about what will happen in the showers and locker room. You can laugh and point out that nothing happened before you told them you were gay. Or you might try kidding them by telling them not to worry and that your standards are higher than those of their girlfriends.

Another book you might try is
Inside Out: Straight Talk from a Gay Jock
by former Olympic swimmer Mark Tewksbury, Wiley (2006).

The Guide’s Hard & Wet Steamy Fiction Reading List

Let’s say you are a young adult and you would like to explore more about same-sex feelings. If you check with your local Gay and Lesbian organizations, they will probably recommend one of the usual coming out books with pictures on the cover of a white kid, a black kid, a Hispanic kid, and an Asian kid, all smiling and happy. Sorry, but it didn’t make our list of suggested titles.

What follows is
The Guide’s Hard & Wet Steamy Fiction Reading List.
Several very smart people have helped assemble this list. The purpose is for you to have a fun time exploring same-sex feelings through the theater of your mind. One of the criteria in constructing this list was to include books that would cause a stirring in your crotch. Many of these titles manage to do just that. It was also important that the books be well-written or intelligent and fun to read.

What if you have homophobic friends and family members? How would you explain these books to them? If that’s an issue, it’s probably best to keep them hidden. (What else is new?) If you drive or use public transportation, maybe you can visit a library in another city. You can spend the day reading there. Perhaps a librarian will keep a book on reserve for you if you’re coming back in a few days. Or maybe you have an aunt or uncle you can trust, or there’s a teacher or minister who will keep your secret. Perhaps they can get the book for you and you can read it at their place. Just be sure it’s not someone who is going to insist that you “come out” or that you “get help,” unless you really do need help. This is about the freedom to explore without social, political or religious pressure.

There are dozens other books that deserve to be on this list. No one would be surprised if we missed some exceptional titles. Also, some of the books will be out of print. You may need to hunt them down.

Young & Wet

A list of books for girls who are exploring same-sex feelings:

Skim
— Mariko Tamaki

Keeping You a Secret
— Julie Anne Peters

grl2grl: Short fictions
— Julie Anne Peters

Far from Xanadu
— Julie Anne Peters

Annie on My Mind
— Nancy Garden

Ruby Fruit Jungle
— Rita Mae Brown

Fried Green Tomatoes
— Fannie Flagg

Valencia
— Michelle Tea

The Passion
— Jeanette Winterson

Tipping The Velvet
— Sarah Waters

Dive
— Stacey Donovan

Strangers in Paradise
— Terry Moore

Flaming Iguanas
— Erika Lopez

The Wrestling Party
— Bett Williams

Girl Walking Backward
— Bett Williams

Dare, Truth or Promise
— Paul Boock

Deliver Us from Evie
— M.E. Kerr

Crush
— Jane Futcher

Memory Mambo
— Achy Obejas

Parrotfish
— Ellen Wittlinger

As you might notice, the guy’s list that follows is substantially longer than the women’s list. The body of lesbian literature for young adults is a bit thin if you include the criteria of “fun and sexy.” Tragic and angst-filled, no problem; boring and academic—you could fill a library. Fortunately, there’s plenty of excellent panty-drenching lesbian erotica, but that could be a little intense for someone who is just starting to explore. On the other hand, the rules of “intense” have changed since the Internet became part of our lives!

If you do watch lesbian porn, be aware that there’s real lesbian porn that’s done by lesbians, and there’s fake lesbian porn which is for straight guys and has little to do with the kind of sex that women have with women.

Young & Hard

A list of books for guys who are exploring same-sex feelings:

PINS
— Jim Provenzano

Lawnboy
— Paul Lisicky

Diary of a Hustler
— Joey

My First Time
— Jack Hart

Foolish Fire
— Guy Willard

Dream Boy
— Jim Grimsley

Boys Like Us
— Patrick Merla

Easy Money
— Bob Condron

Glove Puppet
— Neal Drinnan

My Worst Date
— David Leddick

The Persian Boy
— Mary Renault

The Boys on the Rock
— John Fox

Changing Pitches
— Steve Kluger

Smooth and Sassy
— John Patrick

Enchanted Boy
— Richie McMullen

For a Lost Soldier
— Rudi van Dantzig

Harlan’s Race
— Patricia Nell Warren

Blind Items
— Matthew Rettenmund

Boy Culture
— Matthew Rettenmund

World of Normal Boys
— K.M. Soehnlein

Execution Texas: 1987
— D. Travers Scott

The Milkman’s on His Way
— David Rees

The Front Runner
— Patricia Nell Warren

The Arena of Masculinity
— Brian Pronger

Sex Toy of the Gods
— Christian McLaughlin

Angel, The Complete Quintet
— John Patrick

Telling Tales Out of School
— Kevin Jennings

Gay Olympian
— Tom Waddell & Dick Schaap

Out on Fraternity Row
— Windmeyer & Freeman

Entries From a Hot Pink Notebook
— Todd Brown

Someday This Pain Will Be Useful to You
— Peter Cameron

Dan Woog —
Jocks

Keith Hale —
Cody

Perry Moore
— Hero

Wiliam Taylor —
Jerome

Will Fellows —
Farm Boys

Paul Russell —
Boys of Life

Kief Hillsberry —
War Boys

Russell —
The Coming Storm

James St. James
— Freak Show

Alex Sanchez —
Rainbow Boys

Mark A. Roeder —
A Better Place

William Taylor
—
The Blue Lawn

David Levithan —
Boy Meets Boy

William Corlett —
Now and Then

Brent Hartinger —
Geography Clu
b

Brian Malloy
—
Twelve Long Months

James Lecesne
—
Absolute Brightness

Richie McMullen —
Enchanted Youth

Andre Aciman
—
Call Me by Your Name

Here are some newer titles suggested by friends of Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations:

Choir Boy — Charlie Anders

Alanna Series — Tamora Pierce

My Fathers Scar: A Novel — Michael Cart

The Left Hand of Darkness — Ursula Le Guin

The Weetzie Bat Books — Francesca Lia Block

The Perks of Being a Wallflower — Stephen Chbosky

The Heart’s Progress: A Lesbian Memoir — Claudia Bepko

Am I Blue?: Coming Out from the Silence — Marion Dane Bauer

The Man Who Fell in Love with the Moon: A Novel — Tom Spanbauer

A Big Thanks
to Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations, Matthew Torrey, Kayla Strassfeld, Dan Culliane, and Judith Rosen from PW, Eric Garrison, and to Ralph Bolton, Professor of Anthropology, Claremont College. Professor Bolton is first person in the country who the author of this Guide turns to for help with mind-boggling questions of an anthropological nature.

CHAPTER

79

Gender Benders

T
he author of this book recently sent the following e-mail to a university professor who is renowned for his incredible sex education course saying, “I’m really struggling with how to present transgenderism. Do you have any suggestions?” The professor, who has always been generous with advice, replied apologetically that he struggled with trying to understand transgenderism. He said, “Be sure to let me know what you come up with.”