The Impostor, A Love Story (30 page)

My body was still trembling. “I don’t want
you to stop. I am ready, Dylan.”

“No, you deserve better than this.” He
continued focusing on my eyes. My heartbeat screamed through my
upper body. “Not here in Brad’s guest room. You deserve better than
this. I love you, Nikki. I need to wait. I want it to be
perfect.”

“Dylan, I want to make love to you.”

That was all I needed to say. He kissed me so
passionately my body spasmed out of control and my nails dug into
his back. He rolled over on top of me, and in our frenzy, our
bodies became drenched in sweat. I was ready, truly ready for him
to take me. A yearning burned in my stomach as I reached to undress
his final piece of clothing and finally feel him inside me. The
phone rang and reminded us of the time. He slowly pulled away and
looked into my eyes, giving me one gently-adoring kiss.

“I can’t . . . I won’t rush this, Nicole. We
have to leave soon. I need to wait. I want it to be perfect.” He
kissed me, slowly sliding off the bed.

“No, no, please.” The palpitations in my
chest screamed. “Dylan, I need you.” I grabbed his hand and pulled
him toward me. Still out of breath I begged, “Make love to me. You
are leaving tomorrow, Dylan. Please.” The phone began to ring
again.

“I won’t rush this, Nicole. I love you too
much.”

“Please, please at least hold me.” If we
couldn’t make love, I needed be in his arms. He lay back on the
bed. My head rested on his chest as he cradled me.
What the hell
happened
? My heart was racing, pleading.
I can’t wait.
Please take me
. I love you so much.

It was as if he could read my mind.

He kissed me and promised, “It will be worth
waiting for.”

“Steve, I never knew you had a tattoo.” I
referred to the inked stem I saw on his forearm as he pulled up his
sleeves to light the grill. “Let me see it.”

“Oh, it’s nothing.”

“Come on, what kind of flower is it?”

Steve lifted his sleeve a little higher,
revealing the petals of the yellow carnation.

“It’s pretty. I don’t know why I haven’t
noticed it before. I guess I’ve never seen you in short sleeves.”
Below the carnation was a red apple with a bite taken out of
it.

He grabbed a cigarette from the pack and
brought it to his mouth, inhaling as he lit it. “I got it to remind
me of my ex-wife.” He blew out the smoke.

The yellow petals of the flower were so
joyful and full of life.

“When you were in love?”

“I got it when she left,” he confessed as he
took another drag and used a paper cup as an ashtray. He hardly
ever smoked around me, but more and more I noticed the smell of
cigarettes on his clothes.

“When she left?” I was confused.

“I got it as a reminder.” Taking the
cigarette out of his mouth, he seemed to fixate on the smoke at the
tip.

“A reminder?”

He brought it back to his lips taking a nice,
slow drag. “A yellow carnation means disappointment, betrayal,
deceit, scorn. It’s there to remind me nothing is ever as it seems
and to remind me . . .” He stopped speaking and exhaled, as if he
was caught up in a deep thought.

“I guess she really hurt you.” I was a little
taken back. It was such a cheerful flower. Betrayal? Wow. I didn’t
even want to hear about the apple.

Dylan and I looked at each other. I could
hear the underlying disgust in Steve’s voice. I had never heard how
resentful he was before. He had just seemed hurt, but now he seemed
angry. He quickly changed the hatefulness in his voice.

“So, how do you like your steak?”

“Medium rare.”

“Medium.”

“Well-done.” We answered as if we were
popping popcorn—one on top of each other.

“So, you smoke American Spirit?” Dylan asked,
picking up the pack from the table. “Aren’t they hard to find?” He
was quick to remove the uneasiness that hung in the air.

“You want one?” Steve asked, getting ready to
put the steaks on the grill.

“Oh no, I’m fine.” Dylan laid the pack back
down.

“Emily, you want to help me make a salad?” I
called to her as I walked to the kitchen.

“Sure.” She followed me.

“Is there anything I can do?” Dylan asked,
joining Steve by the grill.

I sensed Steve didn’t like Dylan much. A lot
of men didn’t because they were intimidated by his mass.

Emily and I could hear Steve mumble from
inside the kitchen.

“I didn’t want to say anything in front of
the ladies, but it’s a reminder I will one day get revenge. She
will get what she has coming to her. It means
disdain, rejection, and
you have
disappointed me
.
I study it every day, I wait, and I get ready. You never
strike when they expect you to, but you prepare for the right
moment. She will get hers, I promise you. She will get hers.
Rejection—she thinks she is in control. I just watch. I wait. Do
you hunt, Dylan? You must remain invisible till you attack. Like a
leopard.”

Dylan didn’t know what to
say to him. It was very awkward for a moment and then Dylan hit
Steve on the shoulder, “You’re messing around, right?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m messing
around,” Steve confessed.

We ended up having a nice
meal together.

“Can I have more gummy
bears?” Jessica’s asked, holding out her ice cream
sundae.

After we finished eating,
Steve rushed into the kitchen and came back with dishwashing gloves
on his hands. He picked up Dylan’s glass, fork, and knife from the
table.

“I’ll clean up,” Steve
commented. “I know this is your last day here, and you have to get
to the airport.” Steve went back into the kitchen.

“We can help you clean
up,” we all said in unison and scurried to pick up everything on
the table. Steve seemed a little moody, and I figured it would be
better not to have him feel like our maid. When we got to the
kitchen, I noticed Dylan’s glass and utensils were not in the sink.
Not thinking too much about it, we brought the rest of the dishes
to the counter.

“We can do the dishes. You
did most of the cooking.”

“If you insist.” Steve
seemed to be pleased at our offer and handed us each fresh
dishwashing gloves. Dylan placed them on the counter as if he had
never seen a man wear them before.

“So you think you are too
macho to wear the gloves?” Steve smirked. Dylan looked at me,
raising an eyebrow, and put them on to avoid an
argument.

“Why don’t you dry?” I
handed Dylan a towel.

“Mommy, can I help you?”
Jessica pulled a chair over to the sink to stand on. Emily put the
dishes away, and we finished quickly, putting our gloves on the
counter. Steve walked over and picked them up to put them
away.

“You all should be
leaving. Look at the time,” Steve commented.

Dylan took my hand and led me over to the
corner of the room. He gave me a little kiss and handed me an
envelope. “Put this in your room before we leave.”

“What is it?”

“It’s going to be almost four weeks before I
see you again. You need a little buffer since you haven’t been able
to work. It will give you a little spending money for Jessica.”

“I can’t take it,” I protested, handing him
back the envelope.

“I’m hard headed,” he reminded me, placing it
in my hands.

I peeked in the envelope. “Five thousand
dollars,” I gasped. “You are crazy!”

“I will not take no for an answer.” I took it
to keep him from being too loud since Emily and Steve were across
the room, and I knew Dylan would insist.

“Put this somewhere safe. We gotta get to the
airport.”

When we were on the way to the airport, the
subject came up again.

“Nicole, I really don’t like this Steve guy.
I wish you would let me get you a place of your own.”

“He’s not usually like that. I think he’s
just upset about the nanny not showing up, and he’s probably
missing his kids. Maybe he’s a little threatened by you. I mean,
you look like a gladiator.” I leaned over and kissed him. “My
gladiator.”

“At least think about it, especially if you
see any yellow carnations.” We both laughed.

“Yeah, that was a little weird, wasn’t it?” I
tried to change the subject. “What do you want for Christmas?”

“You. All I want is you.” He was about to
board the airplane. I didn’t want to say goodbye.

“Four weeks is going to be like an
eternity.”

“But I will have you for the holidays.” He
smiled as he kissed me.

I had been the one asking him to wait. Now I
wanted him so bad I couldn’t stand it. Just being close to him made
my heart excited. I couldn’t wait to be in his arms again. He
kissed me one last time, taking my hands in his.

“I love you, Miss Nicole Carlisle.” He gently
squeezed my hands. “I love you.”

A warm feeling consumed me as he spoke the
words
. I love you too Dylan. I love you more than you will ever
know.
I don’t know why I was afraid to tell him. It was like
once I spoke the words I would wake up and it would be over. He was
like a dream, a fairytale. I looked up at him. “Why do you have to
go,” I held him tight. “I don’t want you to go Dylan.”

“I’ll be back soon baby, before you know it,
it will be Christmas.”

When I arrived home from the airport, Steve
had gone somewhere. Hearing the sound of my tire tracks, Timothy
came out of the garage.

“Timothy, how are you doing?” I asked as I
exited the car.

“Doing okay? I thought you were Steve,”
Timothy replied.

“Nope, just Nicole. Hey, where is Alan? I
haven’t seen him for almost a week.”

“I heard he went back to the Lower 48.”
Timothy seemed a little upset.

“Really? I thought he was staying here for a
while.”

“So did I, but apparently after Steve paid
him, he decided to go back. Maybe it was too cold for him.”

“He didn’t say anything to you?”

“No, he left without saying goodbye.”

“That stinks. Ya’ll seemed like pretty good
friends.”

“That’s what I thought, but he left no phone
number or anything.”

The cold air got to me. I figured I’d only be
out in it for a few seconds, so left my bulky winter coat in my
room.

“I’m sorry, Timothy. I have to get inside.
You don’t go leaving without saying goodbye, okay?”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he assured me.

“Keep warm.” I ran to the house.

When I woke up the next morning, I saw Steve
sitting in the dining room, talking to someone on the phone.

“You can be here tomorrow? That’s perfect.
What? Five thousand dollars? The banks are closed, so I can’t wire
it to you today. Do you know the next time you can catch a flight?
I can wire it tomorrow when the banks open.” He paused. “That
doesn’t make sense. They only fly to the US once a week? You won’t
be able to leave until next week? I guess we’ll have to wait
because, like I said, the banks are closed. And they don’t take
credit cards? I’ll see what I can do. Call me in two hours. I think
you’ll just have to come in next week.” He hung up the phone,
irritated.

Steve turned to me. “That was the nanny. She
said she could leave tomorrow, but I’d have to wire the money
today. She’s in a small town, and they only fly up here on Mondays.
I can’t believe she waited till a Sunday to call. The banks are
closed, and I can’t take that kind of money out of an ATM. I guess
I’ll have to wait another week. I can send it out there
tomorrow.”

I knew he had the money. He was really
well-off. Maybe I could let him borrow it until tomorrow. I knew he
was good for it, and I really needed the nanny to get here. I
couldn’t work until she arrived.

“You could get the money tomorrow?”

“Of course, it’s in the bank.”

“Dylan let me borrow some money. I need it
right back, but if it would help get them here tomorrow, it would
be worth it. I haven’t had the chance to go to the bank.” I went to
the room and pulled out the envelope.

“I can’t ask you to do that. I can wait one
more week. It’ll be fine”

“No, it’s fine. I don’t need it today and you
do, and like I said, I know you are good for it. I can’t wait till
the nanny gets here. I can’t wait to meet your kids, either.” It
was really the nanny I was waiting for.

“I will go to Western Union now so I’ll be
back when she calls. She said she could fly to Oregon and pick up
the kids, and they would get here late tomorrow night.”

“That will be amazing.”

I did not want to spend any of Dylan’s money.
I was going to pretend it didn’t exist, anyway. I wouldn’t miss it.
It was like I was putting it in the bank. Steve was good for
it.

The next morning, Steve slammed the front
door as he entered the house. Timothy didn’t show up for work and
it enraged Steve. I didn’t dare ask him about the money.

We anticipated the arrival of the nanny and
the boys. I was so excited about finally getting to go to work. I
really needed the money. We waited and waited, but she never showed
up. Steve was even more upset, so I didn’t ask him for the money on
Tuesday, either. I didn’t want to seem too eager about it, but I
needed it back. Especially since the nanny didn’t show up
again.

It was getting to the point that I would need
to find someone else who was trustworthy and pay them. I was
starting to worry. What if she just stole the money? What if she
had no intention of ever coming?

The phone rang and Steve answered it. In a
gruff voice he spit out, “It’s for you, Nicole,” and he disappeared
upstairs into his room. I picked up the phone. I heard a clicking
sound, then it stopped, but the phone call still seemed a little
muffled. I assumed it was on Dylan’s end.