The Lights of Tenth Street (20 page)

As they rode the down escalator, Doug’s phone rang. He glanced at the readout and made an amused grimace.

“Doh! It’s Sherry. I didn’t call her today. She’s probably furious with me.” He grinned as the ringing stopped. “I’m supposed to be on a plane right now, so she probably just wanted to leave a voice mail berating me for not calling her.”

Eric looked at him, curious. “Why didn’t you?”

“Because I’m not that good an actor. I was in the airport really early today. I thought I might give it away if she asked where I was and I had to lie through my teeth.”

“Good point.”

Five minutes later, the tram got stuck underground, the automated voice apologizing every minute. “We are experiencing technical difficulties. Please stand by.”

By the time they were done “standing by,” both men were looking anxiously at their watches. They ran up the escalator and raced to the baggage claim.

S
herry Turner hurried up to the house and rang the bell, admiring the festive holly and ivy that festooned the walkway. The front door opened, and Lisa Elliott gave Rebekah a big hug before shooing her out the door.

Rebekah trotted down the walk toward Sherry’s van, clutching a bag filled with her costume and makeup. Lisa gave Sherry a quick hug as well.

“Thanks so much. I’ll be along in an hour or so. Would you save a seat for me and Eric?”

Sherry smiled. “Sure thing.” Without warning, she was overtaken by a huge yawn.

“Goodness. Are you okay?”

“Sorry.” Sherry put her hand over her mouth, trying to stifle another yawn. “Brandon is sick, and he’s been up a lot the last few nights. He’s staying home with a babysitter.” She gave a rueful laugh. “I wish
I
could stay home with a babysitter!”

“You sure you’re okay to take the girls to the warm-up? Why don’t I—”

“No, no, I’m fine. I’ll see you there.”

She climbed back in the van and sped off toward the church.

A voice piped up from the backseat. “Thanks for picking me up, Mrs. Turner.”

“No problem, Rebekah. I’m glad to do it. Genna had to be there for the warm-up, too, you know.”

In the rearview mirror, Sherry saw Genna tug on the older girl’s coat sleeve, heard the small voice.

“Are you nervous?”

Rebekah’s voice was also quiet. “A little, I guess.”

“This is my first ever show.”

“Really? It gets easier the more you do it. You’ll be great. When I did the show last year, I …”

Sherry listened in amusement, thankful as Rebekah stepped into the “big sister” role.

“Is your daddy going to be there?” Genna asked.

“Yes. He’s flying home tonight. He may be a little late, but he’ll be there.”

There was a long pause, then a quavering whisper. “I want my daddy to be there, too.”

Sherry started to respond, but Rebekah leaned over and patted her daughter’s arm.

“I’m sorry, Genna. Why don’t you tell God how you feel?”

Immediately, the little girl clasped her hands together, fingers tightly intertwined. She scrunched her eyes shut.

“Dear God, this is Genna. I’m sad my daddy is in California. Please bring him home tonight to see my show. Amen.”

Sherry grimaced. Rebekah had meant well. But the four-year-old had no concept of how far away California was. She probably thought that her dad could change his mind at the last minute and show up after all, if he really wanted to.

Sherry looked in the rearview mirror and roused a bright smile. “Sweetheart, God hears your prayer. Your daddy will be home tonight, but
after
the show. He’ll be there at breakfast in the morning. Okay?”

Genna still had her hands clasped. She looked down at them, then back at Sherry, her eyes wide. “But I prayed, Mommy.”

“I know, sweetheart. And God heard you. And He loves you and wants what’s best for you. But sometimes He asks us to wait for things we want. Daddy will be home later. He’ll be so excited to see you, and you can tell him all about your play and show him the videotape in a few days. How about that?”

Genna settled back in her seat, her hands firmly clasped. “Okay, Mommy. But I’m still going to pray.”

Sherry dropped the girls off at the front door and found a parking space. She walked with tired steps up to the church and took a seat, fighting to keep her eyes open in the deserted sanctuary.

She rested her head on the back of the pew in front of her and tried not to cry. She knew Doug cared about his family, but here she was again, lonely, without him. She was tired of feeling like a single parent, up all night with sick kids. And why was she always having to apologize to the kids for their father’s absence? And now, her little girl was not only going to be heartbroken, she was going to be confused about prayer, about whether God really heard her cries.

Sherry gave a sad laugh and sat back in her empty pew. She’d wondered the same thing a few times.

She fished her cell phone out of her purse and started to dial Doug’s number. She hesitated, clicked the phone shut, then picked it up and dialed again.

“Doug, this is Sherry. I wish you had called me today before you got on your flight. How many times do I have to ask you to keep in touch when you’re traveling?”
The words gushed out, and somehow she didn’t want to stop them. “It makes me wonder whether I really matter to you at all. And just so you’ll know before you see your daughter in the morning, Genna prayed that you’d be here tonight for her show. I told her we don’t always get what we want, when we want it, which I’m starting to realize myself.” She paused, then added, grudgingly, “I love you. I hope you make it in safe tonight.”

She clicked the phone shut. Instead of feeling better after unloading her anger, she felt worse.

Great. Now I’m a nagging wife, too
. She forced her mind away from that thought.
He deserved it
.

The two men hurried to Eric’s car and exited the airport. For the next thirty minutes, Doug could hardly sit still. He watched the clock, anxious at every traffic slowdown, every stoplight.

For the next half hour, Sherry sat in the pew, fighting an internal battle as the church gradually filled up around her. The more she tried to convince herself she’d done the right thing in leaving that message for Doug, the worse she felt. She had to find a way to distract herself.

Several people she knew took a seat right in front of her, chattering about something. She leaned over and tapped their shoulders. “Merry Christmas, you guys.”

They turned, surprised. “Oh—Merry Christmas, Sherry.” They gave her a quick smile, and then turned back to their conversation.

So much for Christmas cheer. She greeted others as they found their seats, answering the question “Where’s Doug?” with a saccharine smile, over and over again.

“He’s in California on business. He couldn’t get away.”

“Oh, what a shame.” The inevitable pat on the shoulder. “Well, he can see the video.”

Each time, Sherry nodded and murmured her thanks, forcing herself to smile. She looked up in relief when Lisa rushed in.

“Where’s Eric?”

“He got hung up at the airport. He’ll be here soon.” She laid her coat across a long space next to her, by now the only free space on the row. “Apparently he’s bringing someone with him. A friend he ran into at the airport or something.” She looked over, and her smile faded. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

Lisa was silent for a minute as she set her purse under the bench in front of her. She spoke without looking over.

“Sherry, one of the things that drives me crazy about this church is this surfacey ‘everything’s fine’ thing. I can tell something’s wrong. If you want to talk about it, I want to listen.”

Sherry sat on her hands and gazed up at the church’s graceful ceiling.

Where are You, God?

She looked back at Lisa. “It’s nothing earth-shattering. I’m just upset with Doug.”

“You feel like he should’ve been here?”

“I feel like he
could
have been here! It’s not like he didn’t know about it. He just forgot!”

“But he had his meetings—”

“He scheduled those meetings after I told him about the show date. He could’ve arranged everything differently from the start, in time to be home—like Eric did—but he just plain forgot. It just wasn’t
important
enough to remember. He just didn’t care about his own daughter’s show!”

She caught a curious glance from the people in front of her and fell silent. Great. Now
her
marriage was fodder for the gossip mill.

Lisa reached over and gave her a hug. She kept her arm around Sherry for a few moments, then gave a gentle squeeze and released her.

“Doug loves you all a lot. Are you sure he truly doesn’t care, Sherry?”

Sherry gave an exasperated sigh. “He cares. I know he does. He’s pretty upset about missing tonight, too, especially once he heard how upset Genna was. But it doesn’t change the fact that it’s his fault and he could have been here.”

“Yeah, I know. But can I make a suggestion?” At Sherry’s nod, she wrinkled her nose a bit. “I don’t … I don’t think it will help to berate him about it. Husbands walk a fine line all the time, trying to please both work and home, and he’s working awfully hard to support your family.”

“But home should be his first priority—not his last!”

“I know. I know. Believe me,” she gave a short laugh, “I’ve been there, babe. Eric and I have been around this mountain multiple times over the years. But … well, what I’ve found is that Eric truly wants to be home with me and the kids, and honestly feels that he tries to be home as much as he can be, given the constraints of his job. The only other solution would be to get a different job. And for the moment, I just couldn’t ask that of him—he’s so alive with this one, he loves it so much. I want him to love what he does for a living. That is so important to a guy, you know.”

“No more so than for a woman.” Sherry looked sideways, affronted. “I loved my job, too, and I gave it up in order to be home with the kids for a few years. Why can’t he make the same kind of sacrifice?”

“Well, of course he
can
, if that’s what you both decide is best for all of you. But it’s different with men. Their work is a part of them—a part of their manhood—in a way that’s just different from women.” Lisa looked sideways, curious. “Surely you know that.”

“I don’t know that I buy it. Granted, you may be catching me on a bad day, but I don’t know why it would be any bigger of a deal for him to make that sacrifice than for me.”

The lights dimmed and Lisa leaned over and lowered her voice. “We’ll have to talk more about this at some point. I’d like to continue this conversation.”

Sherry sat back in her seat, feeling energy ebb away like the fading lights. The screen above the stage came alive with the words of a Christmas carol, and the congregation eagerly rustled to its feet. She forced herself to peel off the pew and stand with the others, trying without much success to enter into the Christmas joy so evident all around her.

Genna filed out of the music room with the other kids, costumes rustling, holding Rebekah’s hand tightly. They walked quickly down a long hallway toward the lobby and the entrances to the stage and the sanctuary.

Her lower lip quivered as she approached the empty lobby, and she began to sniffle.

Suddenly, their music director was by their side, her music sheets clutched in her hand. “Genna, dear, what’s wrong?”

“My daddy’s not here! I prayed, and my daddy’s not here!”

The woman gave her a soothing pat on the back, her voice comforting. “There, there. I’m sure he’s just in the sanctuary with your mommy.”

Genna caught Rebekah giving their director a quick shake of her head, and she began to bawl.

“I want my daddy!”

“Oh, sweetheart.” The woman picked her up, and Genna wrapped her arms
around her, sobbing into her shoulder.

The director quickly put her down again and looked into her eyes. “Genna, I’m sorry your daddy isn’t here, but we need you to be an angel tonight, okay? We can’t have a sad angel up on stage, can we?”

“No.” Genna wiped her nose with her white, filmy sleeve.

The woman winced, then gave her a bright smile and chucked her under the chin. “We’re celebrating the birth of baby Jesus tonight, right? That’s a happy thing. Baby Jesus!”

Genna sniffled and gave her a small smile. “Baby Jesus.”

“That’s my girl. So we’re going to be joyful tonight, right?”

Genna sniffled again and perked up slightly. “I’m still praying for my daddy to be here, you know.”

“You do that, dear.” The director patted her on the back again and stood to call the group to attention.

Eric’s car pulled up in the crowded church parking lot as the sound of a Christmas carol poured from the windows.

The two men scrambled out and ran up the steps and into the lobby, slowing to catch their breath as they approached the area near the sanctuary.

Joyful all we nations rise, join the triumph of the skies!

Costumed kids milled around the lobby, chattering in nervous tones. Several men from the congregation held elegant banners on long brass poles, depicting nativity scenes and the songs of the heavenly host. Doug craned his neck, his eyes searching the small throng.

A woman’s voice was raised slightly above the excited hubbub.

“Okay, kids, listen up!”

“
Daddeeeee!
”

Genna came hurtling out of the crowd and leaped straight for her father, her face radiant.

Doug caught his daughter, smothering his face in her filmy costume, and knelt on the floor. He held her tight, surprised by his own tears, rocking her back and forth.

“I love you, Genna. I love you, little girl.”