The Lonely Girl (14 page)

“Jake, just let me go. I need to be alone.” I run out the room and can hear raised voices. I know it’s my brother, Jake and Keegan. I don’t wait around. I get in the elevator and head to the lobby. There are tears streaming down my face. I’m not paying attention as I exit the building in a rush. Before I
know what’s going on I hear a smash and instantaneously, I feel pain. I’m on the ground, and my face is warm and wet. It’s my blood. I hear someone laugh and then I have something placed in my hand. As they walk away I grab it. I must have blacked out.

I come to and hear my brother saying my name. “Becca, oh my God. Hold on Becca.” I hear his phone dial, and he’s telling someone to send an ambulance. I can’t be that bad. I try to move, but I’m woozy and can barely lift my head. I hear another gasp.

“Alec, what happened?” It’s Keegan.

“Keegan, run up and get Jake now!” He doesn’t move because my brother yells, “I said to go get Jake.” I hear doors open and close. “Becca, who did this to you? Don’t close your eyes.”

I see blue and red lights and hear sirens. There are paramedics pushing my brother out of the way. They ask me my name. I barely hear them my head is muffled. The sounds feel like they’re forever away. “Becca.” It’s all crackly and quiet when I say it. I’m being lifted to a stretcher and now being wheeled away. I hear Jake scream. It’s a blood curdling one. He’s beside me.

“Jake.” I feel his hands on me.

“Shush baby you’re going to be okay.” Keegan is trying to push his way through and Jake’s not having that. “I think you’ve done enough, Key, back off. Go back to your skank.” Jake is pulled from me. I hear a punch thrown. “None of this would have happened if you hadn’t been, Key. She wouldn’t have stormed out!”

My brother is beside me.
“Call Mom,” I say, but now everything is getting foggy. I’m so tired, maybe I could just close my eyes.

“Becca, it’s Jake. Open your eyes.” His hand is on mine. I turn my hand, and I place what’s in my hand in his hand before I black out. It’s a butterfly.

Chapter 12

I feel like a thousand pounds, and my eyes won’t open. My head is throbbing. I hear people talking and crying.

“Why won’t she wake up, Alec?” It’s Jake. Oh, thank God, Alec and Jake are here. I don’t hear Alec’s response. “Becca, baby please wake up. Open your eyes, Beckers. I need you.” My heart is breaking. God, what’s wrong with me?

“Jake go home and sleep. I’ll call you if anything changes. They said she’ll wake up on her own. She’s been through a lot with the surgery.” That’s my mom. Surgery what surgery? The voices are muffled, and I slip back into a sleep.

Someone is stroking my cheek. I still can’t respond to them. “Babe, please be okay. I’m sorry for everything. Just wake up and tell me I’m an idiot. I love you.” He loves me. Keegan just said he loves me.

“Keegan you need to go Jake’s on his way. I’ll call you.” Alec is telling Keegan to leave. What happened? I am pulled back into the blackness again.

“Becca, I’m sorry I should have been there. I should have kept you safe. I love you, Becca.” I feel my eyes fluttering. I squeeze his hand. I hear him gasp. “Baby. Becca, open your eyes.” The room is bright. I’m squinting, but I see him, he’s blurry though.

My voice is raspy. “I love you
, Jake.” His head is leaning on my chest. He’s weeping. I bring my hand up and put it on his head. “I need you too.” That just makes him cry harder.

The door opens, and I hear a crash and splash. I look up to see Alec staring at me. Tears start streaming down his face. He runs over to my other side.

“Becca, thank God you’re okay. I’ve been here every day waiting for you to wake up.” He’s not shaved and is a mess.

“How long have I been asleep?” My brother is too choked up answer.

“It’s been twelve days, Beckers.” I turn to Jake with what I assume looks like pure shock. “Becca, you had to have emergency surgery to relieve the pressure on your brain and stop the bleeding. They weren’t sure if you were going to...” Jake’s barely holding it together. “But you’re awake.” 

The doctor comes in and tells me the same thing Jake had except in medical terminology. He says the bleeding has stopped, and now that I’ve woken up there doesn’t appear to be any damage. The blurriness should dissipate over the next few days. He says the police will want to talk to me, but he’s
told them to come tomorrow about the incident. I look to the guys confused.

As soon as he leaves I turn to Jake. “What happened to me? Was I in an accident?” Jake shakes his head. Alec just looks down at the ground.

“Becca, what’s the last thing you remember?”

“
Well, getting to the party, but it’s a little foggy.”

Jake leans in and kisses me softly. “I’m so happy you’re awake. We can talk about this later.” He holds my hand, and I remember kissing him at the party. Oh
God, what did I do? Does he think we are together? Do I want to be together? I yank my hand away and put my face in my hands and cry. Jake climbs into the bed with me.

“Jake
, I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I did that. I kissed you like that. You’re my best friend.” Alec laughs. He actually laughs.

“
Well, it was kind of hot, Beckers, but it doesn’t change anything. You’re still my best friend and that’s not going to change because of one very hot kiss.” He’s messing with me. I lift my head and he and Alec are grinning at me. I swat at Jake.

“It was pretty hot huh?” I giggle. It makes me wince, but luckily they don’t notice.

“Imagine how hot and heated a kiss would be if you and the guy had romantic feelings?” Alec says with a smile on his face. 

I turn to Jake and look away instantly. He’s looking for my reaction to what my brother said.

“Beckers, I love you and yes, there was a time when I wanted to be with you completely. But I’m not in love with you.” I take a deep breath.

“Me too
, Jakey, but that doesn’t mean I’m giving up my sleeping buddy.” He laughs.

“We have never slept apart since school started. I was here every time with you that’s not going to change now.”  I snuggle into him.

My mom and dad show up after my brother called them to tell them I was awake. My mom was a blubbering mess. My dad wasn’t much better when he walked in and saw me. The doctor said he was keeping me for five more days. I told my mom and dad to go back home, and I’d see them as soon as my semester was done. They were reluctant but agreed. Jake and Alec never left my side all day.

I wanted to ask where Keegan was, but I wasn’t sure if I had the right to ask after what I did with Jake in front of him. After seeing he wasn’t going to show up, I asked, “Where’s Keegan?”

Alec was the first to respond. “Crap I didn’t call him to tell him you woke up. He’s been here a few times, but only when Jake’s not here.” I remember hearing something about that. I look to Jake.

“He doesn’t have a right to know, Alec. After what he did with Sarah you shouldn’t have let him in here, but she’s awake now so I guess it’s up to her.”
Oh, that’s right Sarah and the party. I feel nauseated. I told him to do it though. I can’t blame him for it.

“I better call him I’ll be back, Becca.”

I shake my head. “No let me do it. I need to do this. Can you guys give me a minute?” They both agree and say they’re going to get me some food.

I use my brother’s phone and call Keegan. He answers right away. “Alec, is she awake yet? I hate not being there. I know you want to let her decide.” I am speechless. “Oh God. No, Alec, please say something is she, did she make it?” He’s sobbing.

“Keegan.”

He stops. “Becca. Oh, Becca, you’re awake. I’m so sorry, babe. I swear I didn’t mean any of it.”

I’m crying not because I’m upset by Keegan’s words, but because I missed that voice so much. “Keegan, I need to see you. Please come and we can talk.”

He said he was on his way and would be here soon. I told him not to rush. I didn’t need him in the bed next to me.

The guys arrived as I got off the phone, and I told them he was coming. Jake was worried it was a bad idea because I shouldn’t be getting upset. “Jake, I told him to do it. He said some things and I said some things in a heated disagreement and I told him to do it. Then I kissed you to really add fuel to the fire.”

The door breaks open, and I see a disheveled Keegan. Jake grunts but doesn’t move from my bed.

“Jake, let’s give them some privacy. Becca could use a hot chocolate. We can go get it.” I know my brother’s trying to get Jake to go and to be honest I want one.

“
Oh, that sounds so good.”

Jake kisses my cheek. “Then that’s what you’re getting. I’ll be back, Beckers.”

The door closes behind them leaving Keegan and me alone. He slowly approaches my bedside. He pulls the chair up with him and sits down. “Becca, I never thought I’d get to see those eyes again.” He’s got tears coming down his face. I reach over to him and pull him over to me.

“I’m sorry for what I said to you
, Keegan. You were right, you’re not Michael and I was punishing you for his actions.” I see his eyes, they are full of questions.

“Becca, I don’t blame you for being with Jake. I pushed you right to him.”

“Jake and I are not together. We already talked about it. We love each other but we aren’t in love with each other.” His eyes are just staring at me like I spoke to him in a completely different language.

“I told Jake no hard feelings. He didn’t say anything. I thought he was mad I was coming around because you were together.”

I shake my head. “Jake was mad at you and he didn’t clarify to be a jerk. He wanted it to come from me. He didn’t want you visiting because he knew how hurt I was. He thought it should be my decision and since I wasn’t awake to make it, then you shouldn’t be allowed around.”

He scoots closer to me. “I can never tell you how sorry I am. I will never talk to her again or so much as look at her in any way. But what is your decision, Becca? I don’t want to push you but these last twelve days have been the longest
days of my life.”

Well, here goes nothing. We can’t keep going like this. One of us has to make the final choice, and
he’s saying it’s me. Before I lose my nerve, I say it, “I love you, Keegan.” He is just staring at me not saying anything. “Keegan, did you hear me?” He nods his head. I turn to look at him and his lips dip down to mine. He’s tender and affectionate.

“You love me? Becca, I have been trying to tell you that since I put you on a plane to Europe. Then you left and you didn’t talk to me much. I thought it was one sided. When you came back to school everything was still there even though I tried to move on. Then I saw you with Jake and I thought, well you know what I thought. I wanted to tell you at the rock but it was too soon for you and too hard.
Now, after the party well, I saw that kiss, Becca. Are you sure you love me and not Jake?”

I shake my head does this man not understand it’s been him since I got off the plane to visit Lake
head. I found this love that consumed me, and it melted the ice I’d put up around my heart. “I love Jake, but I’m in love with you. Jake is my best friend and I won’t lose him. You just came in and set my whole life on fire. I thought I was cold and going to continue to be this for my entire life. I can’t be without you, Keegan because I love you more than anything.”

He kisses me lightly and puts his forehead against mine. “I love you, Rebecca Potts since I saw you get off that plane I knew you were it for me.” We sit and talk for a bit. I can’t believe it’s taken this
long, but Keegan and I are together. So why do I still feel this panic in my heart?

The boys come back in and my brother smirks at me lying in bed with Keegan. Jake speaks first. “Looks like someone has stolen my spot.” I don’t know what to say so I say nothing. If I’m with Keegan, I can’t expect him to be okay with Jake’s and my arrangement.

“Jake, I’ll make a deal with you. When I can’t be there you can, just don’t expect that too often,” Keegan states. He turns to me and smiles. What? He’s not going to try to keep Jake from me.

“Really, you’re fine with us sleeping together?” Jake asking him tells me he’s just as shocked
as I am.

“You’re not in love with her are you, Jake?”

He shakes his head. “I love her as my best friend and sister.” He turns to me and I mouth that I love him too.

“See then no
problem, just no kissing you two.” Jake and I both laugh and shake our heads.

“With what
happened, she’s going to need all of us and I don’t think she should be left alone at all.” Keegan’s right and they all agree that I shouldn’t be left alone. Keegan says as much as he wants to stay, my brother hasn’t slept for more than an hour at a time since I got here. He should take Alec home to sleep and make sure he stays there and gets some good sleep. I believe him, but I also think he’s trying to prove he’s okay with Jake.  “Okay, it’s settled, we will see you tomorrow after the police talk to you and Jake will stay the whole time.”

We say our goodbyes and it’s just Jake left with me.  He climbs into the bed with me and
laughs, shaking his head.