The Mourning Woods - 03 (46 page)

“Let me guess,” I said, not entirely surprised. “I tried to assassinate Turd and Francois.”

“You might not wish to sound so glib,” James warned. “Others might view what you just said as a confession.”

I turned to Sally and Ed. “I knew I shouldn’t have let that asshole get a head start.”

“I’m assuming you’re just going to ignore what I said about watching your tongue,” James commented.

“C’mon, James,” Sally said, “Let’s be realistic here. You and I both know that Bill is a lot of things...but a killer? I’ve owned kittens that were more terrifying.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence, Sally,” I quipped.

“Be that as it may,” James continued. “Francois showed up at camp not long ago. He was gravely injured and had quite the tale to tell. He told me and any Alma that were present. He even managed to summon the moderator early.”

“In other words, anyone who would listen.”

“Exactly. I hate to say it, Dr. Death, but your impressive display of power against the Alma leader the other day has only fueled this speculation.”

“Yeah, but do
you
believe it?” Ed asked.

James smiled and replied, “Well, I have seen Dr. Death in action under other circumstances. To say that I was less than impressed...”

“Yeah, yeah, we get the point,” I interrupted, annoyed that I was being both arrested and insulted in the same breath. “So then why this?” I motioned around us.

Sally replied, “It’s obviously to keep you alive, stupid.”

“As always, Sally my dear, you are quite astute with your observations,” James said, a note of admiration working its way into his voice. “I am limited in regards to my actions here. However, Francois could not have refused my aid without sounding suspicious. Thus by taking you into custody ourselves, Nergui and I can ensure that you remain unharmed until you get a chance to speak your peace.”

“Makes sense,” I replied. “I do prefer the unharmed part. Although speaking of which...Nergui, where the fuck have you been?”

Nergui remained silent. He simply stood there by James’s side.

“I’m afraid he can’t answer,” James replied. “He’s been like this ever since I found him. Poor fellow was standing there guarding a tree stump, most likely thinking it was you.”

I narrowed my eyes as a thought hit me. “Compelled?”

“Undoubtedly. Sadly, whoever did so is stronger than me. I can’t undo it.”

“Then why is he here?” Tom chimed in. “Isn’t that, y’know, a little risky?”

“A fair enough question,” James answered. “I don’t believe so. Nergui appears to have been given several neutral compulsions. I can’t tell the details, but obviously it includes orders to not speak of it. But, fear not. Nergui’s honor is unbending. He is here to protect you at his mistress’s wishes. Even compelled, I believe should anyone make an attempt against Dr. Death’s life that his original orders will take precedence.”

“Will that work?” Christy asked.

I replied to this one, having some first hand experience. “Yeah, it should. Older vamps have more resistance against these things. Also, they can be shrugged off if the emotion is strong enough.”

“Quite true,” James added. “And I will vouch that there is no stronger emotion for Nergui than seeing his duty fulfilled.” James nodded at his men to step aside for Christy. “I must apologize for my rudeness. As a member of a rival delegation here under protection of truce, you are of course free to go.”

“Thank you,” Christy replied, then added. “What about this human?” She indicated Tom. “He was with me when these alleged crimes were committed.”

“Alas, he is a member of Dr. Death’s contingent. As such they must all stand with him.”

“Thanks for trying, hon,” Tom said with a smirk. “It’s no big deal. I’m used to Bill pulling the rest of us down with him.”

I somehow resisted smacking him upside the head. Instead, I asked James, “So what now?”

“Typically conspirators at functions such as this would immediately be put to death.” I opened my mouth to reply, but James held up a hand. “However, since you are the figurative leader of our side that’s a little different. I believe you will be given special consideration and at least be allowed to speak in your defense. I will caution, though, you should choose your words wisely.”

“We are so fucked,” Sally mumbled. Unfortunately, knowing my own penchant for verbal sparring, I wasn’t entirely sure she was incorrect.

* * *

Fortunately, there weren’t any handcuffs or restraints added to the scenario, another perk of my current station. Marching in with my head held high, as opposed to dragged in chains, might have a bit of a psychological effect in my favor...hopefully.

Christy left us to rejoin her own group, assuring us that she’d keep them in check for the time being. It was small comfort at best. The witches were the least of my worries. Being torn limb from limb by a bunch of Sasquatches was my chief concern right at that moment. Of course, being disintegrated by the giant glowing ball of doom wouldn’t exactly be a walk in the park either.

Oh, well, let’s hope I had an ace up my sleeve...and that I could figure out what exactly that ace was before it was too late.

* * *

In many ways, I was kind of glad that Turd had set me up as the bad guy the day before. It made the crowd’s reaction to my entrance seem less surprising. I was already used to feeling like the heel at a
WWE
event. I could handle th...

*Sppt* “Take that, assassin!”

Ewww, goblin spit. That was fucking nasty. Got it in my hair too. Jesus Christ, when this was all over (assuming I survived) I was going to spend an entire week in a nice hot shower.

“Ouch!” Again! This time some little six-armed pixie thing nailed me in the forehead with an acorn. It’s so
comforting
to know that, regardless of species, angry mobs are pretty much all the same.

James’s men and Nergui all moved closer to me. James was right, compelled or not, Nergui was still doing his duty (sorta). That was something, I guess.

Or not. Some flying thing buzzed over us and spilled its drink on my head...at least I hoped it was a drink.

Either way it was clear, someone had been working the crowd against me. It was pretty obvious who that someone was. Francois had probably made a beeline back to the conference after escaping. It made sense. After all, he had more to gain by ratting me out than by staying and fighting. He knew I couldn’t kill Turd without starting a war. Conversely, if Turd won he would have killed my friends and dragged my battered body back here for the same end result. I had walked right into their trap just like the dumbass I am.

Sure enough, standing there in the arena was Francois surrounded by his lackeys. Two of them were supporting him. One of his legs was wrapped in blood-soaked bandages. That was odd. He had already been healing when last I saw him.

I didn’t see any sign of Turd yet, but I did see an awful lot of fur. Numerous Sasquatches stood around the perimeter of the meeting area, far more than had been here on previous days. That explained the empty village earlier. This was supposed to be a momentous day after all; it was rumored that a new treaty was to be announced. Now, however, they all had a possible execution to look forward to as well. Wonderful; two spectacles for the price of one.

James and his men marched us to the bottom of the valley. There, all but Nergui stepped aside. Rather than leave and take their seats, as before, they all moved to the perimeter. My friends and I were left standing there, unshackled and unguarded. It was clear, though, that such precautions were unnecessary. Considering the vamps and Sasquatches standing all around, there was no chance for escape.

* * *

A crackle of thunder blasted forth, no doubt meant to catch the crowd’s attention; however, they were far rowdier than in days past. Our floating moderator thingee actually had to do it twice to get everyone to quiet down. I was personally hoping to see whether it would do so a third time or just start disintegrating random creatures. That’d be a hell of a way to deal with hecklers. Unfortunately, no such luck. The orb glowed brightly for a moment, possibly irked that its authority had been questioned, but then settled back to its normal weirdness.

“THIS SESSION IS NOW IN ORDER...THE GATHERED WILL RESPECT THAT.” The threat hung in the air for a moment or two before it continued. “UNUSUAL CIRCUMSTANCES (unusual
?
) HAVE BEEN BROUGHT TO LIGHT. NON-PARTICIPANTS IN THESE TALKS HAVE REQUESTED AN AUDIENCE FOR GRIEVANCES. IT IS DECIDED THAT THEY WILL BE HEARD BEFORE PROCEEDINGS WILL CONTINUE.”

Grievances? Jeez, talk about an understatement.

“FRANCOIS OF THE VAMPIRES IS RECOGNIZED.”

Francois had time for one quick look of smug satisfaction before hobbling (no doubt milking it a bit) forward to the center of the area.

He cleared his throat loudly (douche) and said, “Today was to have been a momentous occasion. In a show of mutual respect, my people and our honorable rivals have been meeting outside of the confines of this conference...”

“THAT IS HIGHLY UNUSUAL,” the glow-ball interrupted.

“Unusual, but necessary. We wished to meet each other face to face as equals, away from the eyes of those who have sought to disrupt this process.” He cast a baleful glare at me. The motherfucker had no doubt rehearsed this, probably had a script in his back pocket and all.

“It was time well spent. We discovered that neither of our species wishes war and were able to build upon that mutual desire. In just a few short days, we have been able to accomplish what our ancestors took months to do. Today we were to share those results with you. Sadly, this momentous occasion has been marred...marred by treachery.”

Whispers, growls, and gurgles of “Treachery!” rose up from the crowd. Talk about playing to the audience.

“SPEAK YOUR ACCUSATION.”

“Yes,” said Francois, building up the drama in his voice. “I shall. I accuse the Freewill!” He pointed a finger directly at my face. I was tempted to bite it, but I had the feeling that wouldn’t exactly help my case.

“Just a few short hours ago,” Francois continued. “I met with the leader of the Northern Tribes. I had been told of the wonderful news - that our two races would continue to coexist peacefully. As the humble servant (yeah right) of my people in this region, I wished to convey my personal thanks to Turd for his honorable actions.”

Suddenly a bit of movement caught my eye. All of the Sasquatches at the perimeter were standing in rapt attention to Francois’s tale. I could have sworn, though, I saw a distinct sneer of contempt from one at the mention of Turd’s honor. Was that Grulg? Damn, how I wish these fucking monsters were all wearing nametags.

Despite my distraction, Francois continued speaking. I missed a bit, but it’s not as if I couldn’t fill in the blanks. “...Freewill had already shown his disdain by defiling this place. But, was it enough? No, not nearly enough to satiate his war-mongering. He and his cohorts, whether compelled or simply enthralled by him, ambushed us. We fought back, knowing that peace is worth more than either of our lives. Sadly, you are all well aware of the Freewill’s power. I was barely able to escape with my life, sustaining grievous injuries in the process.” He indicated his leg. “Turd’s fate, alas, is unknown. He bravely fought on, demanding I flee and live to tell of this tragedy. I have since asked the members of his tribe to send a search party looking for him. I can only hope that he too was able to escape the ravenous clutches of the beast that stands before us.”