The Natural: How to Effortlessly Attract the Women You Want (36 page)

Her:
I’m free on Friday.

You:
Cool, let’s do it. What’s the best way to get in touch with you?

Her:
I’ll give you my number.

Or…

You:
Do you go out to clubs?

Her:
Yeah, sometimes.

You:
I get invited to some really good parties. You should come out with us sometime—bring your friends too.

Her:
Yeah, okay.

You:
Cool. Well, give me your number and I’ll be in touch closer to the weekend.

Or…

You:
What are you up to?

Her:
Shopping.

You:
Do you know your stuff when it comes to fashion?

Her:
Definitely!

You:
Well, I was hanging out with a fashion consultant recently and she gave me some great ideas. Next time you’re out shopping, I could join you for an hour and you could help me get some new clothes.

Her:
All right.

You:
Cool, let me take your number and we can arrange it.

Sometimes it might not happen so smoothly—in other words, the close might not arise from the conversation naturally. In that case, you could use a hook from earlier to close later. For example, you could find out that she likes shopping, art galleries, and sushi in the first two minutes; and then, five minutes later, you could use any of these things to lead smoothly into the close. The intervening time is spent developing a stronger connection, or just increasing her comfort (and thus the likelihood of getting her number).

The following is an example of a day-game pickup from open to close, with a range of various possible answers covered. Remember that this is a guideline; ideally, there will be room for banter, or for the conversation to go in a different direction. This is principally an example of structure and the fact that, regardless of what a girl says in response to your opener, you can still continue the pickup and close.

A lot of guys ask me things like, “How long should I stay in an interaction?” and “How do you get a number close in the daytime?” The first question should answer itself: you stay until you feel you have enough mutual connection/attraction that she’ll want to see you again. Generally, a solid close will need ten minutes in the daytime, but you could be as fast as three minutes. The idea is that you open and, as soon as she commits to the interaction, you switch into connecting mode and moving toward the number close.

It’s important to note that the point at which you can get a number close is not the same as the point where you can get a date with the girl. She might willingly give you her number, but then—as with some women you meet at night—flake on the date. There are different levels you can get to:

Hey, do you know where Trafalgar Square is?

(Question asked of two young women in London)

Do you guys like to go to clubs?
Okay, cool. Well, I’m meeting my friend later and I think we’re going to a party someplace. I’m not sure where it is, but it sounded cool when he told me. You should definitely come.
(At this point, assess receptivity. Are they up for coming or not? If they are…)
Cool, well give me your number and I’ll text you the details after I meet him.

  
Hook point
. She’s comfortable talking to you and commits to doing so for at least a short time.

  
Email close point
. She doesn’t feel comfortable giving her number but is happy for you to have her email address. She might also take your number when you suggest taking hers.

  
Number close point
. She responds positively to the number close suggestion.

  
Date close point
. This is where she’s enthusiastic about meeting you for a date, to the point of chasing after and trying to close
you
, or is showing a lot of “IOIs” (a.k.a. indications of her interest).

The question is, What can you do, if you get only as far as a number close, to make sure you can line up a date? Some guys convert only 10 percent of their numbers into dates; others are closer to 100 percent—and that’s of course where
you
want to be.

When you’re going for a close, there’s a checklist of things that will show you how likely it is that you’ll convert into a date:

  You arrange a date/next meeting there and then, for a specific activity on a specific day at a specific time and place.

  She takes your number after you take hers, or calls herself from your phone.

  There are some IOIs and attraction on her side.