The Pixilated Peeress (16 page)

             
"Assuredly. But wherefore, with the Queen of the Fays awaiting you in bed?"

             
"That's just the trouble. Were I alone with her again, I might be more than tempted to sign that cursed doc
ument. I'm in love with the woman she was, so I trust not my re
sistance. I refused her once, but 'twas a damned near thing."

             
"With your muscle, she could hardly deny you if you employed force."

             
"Not my wonted way; and if I did, what then? She said she'd stab any wig
ht who so used her in's sleep. I doubt not that her delta be under orders to do the like."

             
"Well, use yonder couch if ye like." Bardi fingered his whiskers. "There's something I did mean to tell you, but I've forgotten what. A moment
...
" The wrinkled fa
ce cleared. "Ah, yea! I found the book wherein I stowed my notes on the learned Doctor Fausto's volume,
Of the Unrigging of Illusions.
I bethought me yestereve, and by good hap I've bought a phial of Fausto's formula from the apothecary. Bide ye in yon cha
ir for the nonce."

             
As he rummaged, the magician continued: "Know, Thorolf, that spells fall into two classes: illusory and substantive. Illusory spells do but alter the appearance of things,
exempli gratia
the cheaper spell I offered to put upon the Coun
tess, to make her seem a short, dark, dumpy woman. Such spells are relatively simple.

             
"Substantive spells, on t'other hand, cause actual re
arrangement of the atoms whereof the thing or person be constructed
...
"

             
He droned on about the rival theories o
f the
modus operandi
of spells. Then, "Ah, here it is!" He pulled out an ancient codex with a cracked and grimy cover of gilded red leather. Presently Bardi presented Thorolf with a pill and a cupful of water. "Wash it down!" he commanded.

             
While Thorolf
obeyed, Bardi grasped a piece of char
coal and, stooping, marked a small pentacle on the floor. He made a few passes and chanted verses in an unknown tongue. "How feel ye, Sergeant?"

             
"I tingle all over," said Thorolf. "A slight head
ache, as if my skull
were pressing on my brain."

             
"That is normal; it will pass."

             
"I hope this turn me not into some lower form of life!"

             
"Never fear! I have taken precautions against such an error."

             
"Is there any way to test the spell?
"

             
"
Aye; I'll summon an illusion,
and ye shall see how it works."

             
Bardi lit four black candles and set them in candle
sticks on the floor, where they burned with a sinister greenish light. He went through a magical procedure, with words and gestures, causing smokes of magen
ta, turquois
e, and lemon green to rise from the candles. When at last he clapped his hands, the smokes co
alesced into a big, black-maned lion, which twitched its tail and gave a hollow roar. Thorolf started back and reached for his sword.

             
"Do but look closely," sai
d Bardi.

             
The young man became aware that this lion was transparent; he could see a couple of candleflames through it. He said:

             
"I understand now, Doctor. How long might this spell last?"

             
Bardi clapped his hands and uttered a word; the lion faded back
into smoke. He gathered and snuffed the candles, saying:

             
"Belike a month; then it needs renewal. Time was when I had to crush and mix the ingredients of that pill myself, and a tedious business it was. Now I need but call at the shop of Frigered the Apo
thecary, where I can purchase many magical preparations made up in pills and drops."

             
Thorolf said: "When I studied at Genuvia, a profes
sor of natural philosophy said that men were working on simpler forms of spells. Instead of all the compli
cations of
pentacles, invocations, gestures, and smokes, the complete spell would be contained in a pill, dis
pensed by an apothecary. This anti-illusion spell, me-seems, is a step thither."

             
"I've heard such rumors," grumbled Bardi, "but I do not believe 'twill eve
r come to that. If it be ever reduced to ready-made pills and powders, it will be time for me to take down my sign and retire."

             
"Why? You could still sell the pills and powders."

             
"So can any man with wit to read a formula and keep his stock in order."

             
"So he won't mistakenly turn his client into a tentacled sea monster?" said Thorolf with a grin.

             
"Nasty, nasty!" Bardi wagged a bony forefinger. "But if all my special skills and knowledge were wasted, I should become a mere file clerk."

             
"You could l
earn the new
—
"

             
"My son, there comes a time when one is just too old and tired to cram new skills into one's aged skull." Bardi rapped his scalp with his knuckles. "At any rate, methinks those Serican tubes whereof I hear will put many of my colleagues ou
t of business, since one dis
charge can wreak more woe in the blink of an eye than a wizard can work with a month of spells."

             
"What about your fee? Orlandus will have beggared us by the time he's through."

             
Bardi waved a hand. "Since he hath forced us
into alliance, forget the fee for now. When we be again sol
vent, it will be time to settle our mutual accounts. Now excuse me; I must to my rest."

-

             
Thorolf left Bardi's house well before dawn. Back at the Green Dragon, whose guests were not yet stirri
ng, he found the room empty. Yvette had taken her beau
tiful new clothes and her reticule, including the contract offered to Thorolf, and vanished. Vasco had not seen her go.

             
Thorolf hastened back to Bardi's house, finding the iatromage at his meager bre
akfast. The soldier reported Yvette's disappearance.

             
"Curse of the green slime!" cried Thorolf. "I should have locked her in, or tied her to the bed, or something to restrain her. Now she'll have returned to the castle."

             
Bardi raised bushy gray eyebrow
s. "It would have accomplished nought. If I know aught of delta posses
sion, she'd have climbed out the window, or screamed for help and asked Master Vasco to release her."

             
"Then I should have stayed and taken my chances on being able to refuse that inde
nture."

             
"But had ye remained steadfast in your refusal, she would still have departed."

             
"I could have held her by force."

             
"Then she'd have cried for help and charged you with kidnapping."

             
"I should natheless have thought of
something.
I am nought b
ut an idiot." He pounded his skull with his knuckles.

             
"Take it not so to heart, Thorolf. Ye did your best, which is all any of us can do. Here, share my feeble fare. 'Twill cheer you up."

             
"I doubt that, Doctor," gloomed Thorolf. "But thanks anyway."

-

             
Fortified with Bardi's breakfast, Thorolf repaired to the barracks to take up his duties. After the morning's drill, he hied himself up Castle Hill. Over the castle gate, above the portcullis, workmen were installing a ban
ner. This was a long yellow ri
bbon of yard-wide cloth on which was painted in scarlet letters the legend: SOPHONOMY SAVES THE WORLD!

             
Thorolf's heart beat faster, as it always did when he thought he was nearing Yvette. As the gate guards crossed their halberds before him, he said: "Pr
ay in
form Yvette, Countess of Grintz, that Sergeant Thorolf would speak with her."

             
The guard soon returned, not with Yvette but with the stout, red-haired, red-robed man with whom he had spoken on his second approach to the castle. This one, eyeing Thor
olf coldly, said in a voice like a steel blade on a grindstone:

             
"What do ye here, sirrah?"

             
"I wish to speak to Countess Yvette."

             
"Forsooth? Know that she does not wish to speak with you."

             
Thorolf felt a flush of anger rising; he fought to keep hims
elf under control. "If you will send her out, or admit me to where she is, she can tell me so in per
son."

             
"That is unnecessary. I have told you all you need know; now depart and cease to trouble us."

             
"Pox on you!" shouted Thorolf as his self-control b
egan to slip. "You've put her under some damnable spell, for which you shall answer to me!"

             
"Ye have mine answer," snapped the red-haired man. Turning to the guards, he said: "Call out the duty squad!"

             
The guard blew a whistle, and more mailed men bus
tled through the gate, drawing swords as they came. The two on guard lowered their halberds, pointing the spearheads at Thorolf's chest.

             
By reflex, Thorolf whipped out his own sword. He was enraged enough to take on the whole duty squad singlehanded, tho
ugh the rational part of his mind knew that he would be hacked to pieces in a trice. As the guards crowded toward him, he backed warily toward the downward path. If he could get them where they could only come at him one at a time
...

             
"What's all this?"
said a mellow voice, as Orlandus appeared. "Call off our hounds, good Parthenius. My dear Sergeant Thorolf! So you are fain to renew your pursuit of the Lady Yvette? Even after you rejected our perfectly reasonable offer?"

             
"Not reasonable at all. You wis
h me to become spell
bound like the Countess. I demand that you exorcise the spirit possessing her and release her, forthwith!"

             
Orlandus chuckled. "My dear fellow! We cannot un
dertake so drastic a change in our program on your mere say-so. I'll tell you
. Come in to drink and dine, and we 11 discuss these matters. I am sure we can reach an amicable arrangement."

             
Thorolf snorted. "Me, enter that nest of vipers so you can have your men seize me and work your magic? How stupid do I look?" He had forgotten
that, just before, he had demanded admission to the castle. "Send out Yvette!"