The Regal Rules for Girls (25 page)

But a hundred years ago, an American girl often paid a high price for her swanky aristocratic title. Many found themselves living in huge, crumbling castles deep in the English countryside, with no heating apart from open fires and, even worse, no running water. Luckily, English stately homes have improved a bit since then
¹
— so don’t let that deter you from your transatlantic objective.

And one more thing—please don’t let a lack of massive family inheritance stop you from going after your man. In the wise words of one Dowager Duchess of Roxburghe, let us remember that “money isn’t everything to an Englishman. There are other considerations when he marries; for instance, fondness for the girl.”

Indeed.

That said, don’t let
anyone
accuse you of gold-digging. You’re a big girl. No one needs to tell you that palaces and jewels can come
and go, and that most aristocratic families are not nearly as wealthy as they seem (many have had to sell off their houses, their furniture, and their art collections—and have essentially lost everything but their titles). I know that, like all girls with a fairy-tale dream, your driving force isn’t money—it’s
love
!

In this day and age (especially if you call yourself a feminist), it can be hard to admit that you believe in the old-fashioned fairy-tale dream of true love. Modern women aren’t supposed to want that. We’re not supposed to want to fall in love with a prince or duke. It’s much trendier, much more “progressive” for twenty-first-century women to pretend we don’t have these dreams. But I’m afraid that doesn’t make them go away.

In reality, setting your sights on finding “a prince” (real or conceptual) is actually making a very strong statement about your own self-worth. You
know
you deserve the best and see no reason why you shouldn’t aim for the stars.

I get that. You get that. (And you better believe that one Frances Ellen Work gets that.) Who cares if no one else does?

So now that you’re happily living and working in London—and know exactly what to wear, what to do, and what to say in the company of polite society (as well as what
not
to)—it is time to stop swooning and go after the Englishman of your dreams. If those fearless American girls could do it all those years ago, then you can certainly do it today.

So let’s start with the Holy Grail:

I admit it. I’ll admit it to you and I’ll admit it to anyone who asks: I once harbored a sincere desire to be a princess. But to achieve this career goal, I had to marry a prince, and since my country was (and is) severely lacking in this department, right after college I moved to England and commenced my search. The royal marriage didn’t work out, but I ended up writing a rather amusing memoir about crossing the ocean to pursue this quirky childhood dream. And since its publication, lots of people have pronounced me certifiably insane. I expected that. But something else happened that I did not expect. I have been overwhelmed with letters and emails from young women all around the world who also want to be a princess (or marry an English aristocrat)—and who, until they read my book, thought they were the only ones in the entire universe who felt that way.

A lot of the girls who write to me have their hearts set on Prince Har-ry—and who can blame them? He’s
hot
. Not to mention that third
²
in line to the British throne is nothing to sniff at. Harry
may never inherit a kingdom, but without all that responsibility, he is able (and clearly willing) to have a lot more fun. William has a huge sense of duty, but Harry has this incredible, laid-back magnetism and that super-sexy mischievous grin. And when it comes to love, something tells me this rowdy redhead has plans to ditch tradition and follow his heart. Royal or no royal, what right-minded girl wouldn’t go after him?

Many accuse these “Harry Hunting” girls of being stalkers, gold-diggers, or just plain delusional. But I’ve met a lot of them and they are nothing of the sort. They are normal American girls who just happen to have big fairy-tale dreams. Most are in London on college exchange programs and find England, with its plethora of palaces and its living, breathing Royal Family, to be absolutely magical. They go to nightclubs like any student would; they attend quintessentially English events like polo and rugby, just like anyone enjoying the UK for the first time might do. And yes, like all single girls in the capital, they keep their eyes open for their personal prince charming. My advice to them is this: Godspeed.

If you believe in your heart that you are worthy of a prince, then don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Harry Hunting

Only a few years ago, Prince William was indisputably the world’s favorite royal heartthrob. I’ll never forget the photo taken during his first year at St. Andrews: His navy sweater hung perfectly off his swimmer’s physique, his cheeks had color, his head had hair, and he looked breathtakingly handsome. (If I’d only been but five years younger!)

Yet in recent years, I’m afraid William’s premature baldness and knockout wife have removed him from the most eligible prince position.
No one is quite sure when it happened, but young Harry surprised us all when he suddenly emerged as the hottest prince in the land. (Here’s to you, Harry. We didn’t see it coming.)

Looking at Harry, it’s hard not to think of his legendary mother—Diana, Princess of Wales—and as the years go by, it’s clear that Harry has inherited her caring, empathetic nature. Harry has often declared his determination to honor his mother’s memory by embracing charity work that helps the disadvantaged: “I want to carry on the things she didn’t quite finish,” he says. (Have you gone weak at the knees yet?)

When not dispatched on a courageous military mission, our handsome soldier is most likely to be found playing polo and clubbing till dawn, but if you are serious about winning his heart, you might want to get involved with one of his charities. Maybe throw a charity fund-raiser and invite him? Crazier things have happened.

PRINCE HARRY’S CHARITIES:

For more information on Prince Harry’s philanthropic engagements, write to: The Foundation of Prince William and Prince Harry, St James’s Palace, London, SW1A 1BS, United Kingdom.

In the 1880s, competition for the young Prince of Wales’s
³
affection was so fierce that American girls would pay to have themselves professionally photographed and then allow their photos to be displayed in shop windows all around London. You have to give them credit for trying, but I don’t think it’s necessary for you to go to such lengths. Instead, try to follow these regal rules…

GOLDEN RULES FOR HARRY HUNTERS: