The Way We Were (10 page)

Opal’s eyes widened. “Is that all?” She
reached for Jared’s hand. “Daddy?”

“Sweetheart, that’s a positive thing. We were hoping for seven percent.”

“It’s good enough, Opal,” Janson reassured her. “I’ll do another test in a few weeks. Maybe functionality will get up to ten percent, or even fifteen eventually, which is very possible with this kind of early result.”

Jared glanced at Ana. She didn’t cry, but he could see the
emotion on her face. Their baby was going to be all right.

When Donuta entered Ana’s house the day after the incident with Opal’s drain, the smell of coffee greeted her. Jared and his daughter were seated in front of the television, watching one of those shows with aliens and robots. Not her taste, but Donuta tried not to judge others’ viewing habits.

Hearing someone in
the kitchen, Jared looked back.
“Matka?”

It broke Donuta’s heart to hear him refer to her with the Polish name after all these years. She’d seen him only briefly and in public, where he did not call her anything.

Opal started to bolt off the couch, and Jared held her back. “Not so fast. You’ve had a big day already.”

Rolling her eyes, Opal slowly got up, picked her way to the kitchen
and threw herself in Donuta’s arms. Donuta was glad to hold the girl because it soothed some of her worry.

“Babka!”

Donuta drew back. “So, what is this I hear about last night,
kochanie
?” Ana had phoned on her drive to work.

“I’m
so
embarrassed.”

“Ah. Well, no one saw but your parents. You know, your mother peed her pants once when she was older than you. The girls, they got laughing
so hard at something Lukasz did, that it just happened.”

Opal giggled. “I didn’t do that.”

“I know. What happened was the result of the operation.”

Jared had gotten up and come to the kitchen. His face was lined with fatigue. His shoulders slumped, and even his color was bad. “Hello, Donuta.”

“Jared.”

Just then, the doorbell rang. Opal said, “Stephanie’s bringing my work home.
Can she stay, Dad?”

“Sure, go up to your room and see if you have questions about any of it.” Just as she left, he added, “I can drive her home when she’s ready.”

“Don’t leave before I see you,
Babka
.”

When Opal was gone, he said, “Can I make you tea?”

“Let me make some for us both. And I am able to drive Opal’s friend home.” She studied him. “You are exhausted.”

“Neither Ana
or I got much sleep last night. She left for the office after lunch.”

“She works very hard.”

“She was meeting with the scholarship committee. She couldn’t miss that.”

“Hmm.” Donuta busied herself with the tea. “I brought dinner.”

“Great. Opal and I were in a daze most of the day. We had toasted cheese sandwiches for lunch. I hadn’t even thought about food for tonight.”

Donuta
poured hot water into the cups, over tea bags, and brought them to the table. The scent of sandalwood wafted up from them. “Would you like to rest, Jared? I came over to help, not to be entertained.”

“No, thanks. I’m tired but I know I won’t sleep.”

“Then you and I will talk.”

His dark brows furrowed, and his gaze become wary. No wonder. He’d been an outcast in the family, believing
no one wished him well. “Do not be concerned. It is good, what I have to say.”

He nodded.

“How is my girl?”

“Tired. She isn’t resting well, either. We were just starting to get our sea legs when last night happened. It was terrifying.”

An old pain formed in Donuta’s heart. “I worried about every cold, scrape or sneeze from my Sofia. Sometimes, I still do.”

“It’s different after
something critical like this happens, isn’t it? Before, worrying about your child is an amorphous concern. Now it’s specific. More real.”

This was a man who felt deeply, which was another reason she had never understood what had occurred between him and her daughter. She was not going to mince words, but she would not pry, either. “Are you and Ana getting along?”

“Yes. I’m glad she let
me stay at the house.”

“I am surprised you are
still
here.”

“Good thing I was. She’d have had to deal with last night alone.”

“This is true.” Donuta considered her options. “Jared, something has changed between you and Ana. I have seen you together so much lately, and I know this. I am not here to ask you about it. I truly wanted to see if Opal was all right. And to bring dinner.”

“But as long as you have me alone, you want to tell me not to hurt her again.”

“I believe that you will not. I was always very sorry your marriage ended. It hurt our whole family. But if you can find a way to be together again, you have my blessing.”

Jared’s jaw dropped. At first he said nothing, then, “Since you’re being honest, Donuta, I will be, too. I’ve asked Ana for a second chance,
and we’re trying to see if there’s room for one between us. After all that’s happened.”

She liked his honesty. “I am very glad to hear that,
d
źwi
ęk
.” Hmm, apparently she still saw him as her son.

President Atkins said, “Come in, Ana,” when she knocked on the door to his office, which was ajar. He stood, circled around his desk and waited by a small conference table off
to the side.

It was cool up here, so she wrapped the gray cardigan sweater she wore tighter around her as she stepped farther into the room. The large, opulent space was filled with dark wood wainscot, furniture and Persian rugs. John Atkins was old school and Ana liked him. “You wanted to see me?”

“Yes. Sit.” He joined her. He was meticulously dressed in a tailored wool suit, the kind
Jared favored. “First tell me how Opal is.”

Sighing, she dropped down onto a chair and tried not to show her fatigue. “We had a scare last night. We thought something might be wrong with her kidney, but it wasn’t. Actually, it moved up tests. Early this morning, we went to the city to meet with the doctor. Her kidney function is enough to rely on in case something happens to the other one.”

John’s expression turned soft, though Ana had seen him toe a hard line on recalcitrant students. “Ana, I’m so glad. But why on earth did you come in today?”

“This is a terrible time of year to miss work. I took nine days off for Opal’s surgery and recovery. There’s a scholarship meeting today that I can’t miss.”

“In any case, I’m glad your daughter’s all right.”

“Did you need something
from me?”

He glanced down at a paper in front of him. His lips thinned, telling her whatever he held was not good news. “Yes, but maybe this can wait.”

“I’m okay, John.” She gestured to the paper. “What’s that?”

“The list of graduate students for the next school year. The subcommittee finalized it.”

“I heard.”

“They were notified last week when you were out.”

“How many
were accepted?”

“Ten. Enough for a small class for each course.”

“The program will be a solid addition to our college. You know how much I was in favor of it. I helped design it, after all.”

He handed the paper to her. “Check the names of who’s been offered admission.”

“Are some graduates of Mount Mary?”

“Yes.”

Ana looked down. First on the alphabetical list was “Ashford,
Valerie. English Education.” She gripped the sheet, wrinkling it. Her mind raced for how to fake delight, or show no reaction. Could she do it with her inner reserves drained by the past few weeks?

“You don’t have to pretend with me, Ana.” John’s voice was full of concern. For her? “I know about Jared and Ms. Ashford.”

She stilled. Oh, my God! “H—” She cleared her throat. “How do you know?”

“Jared came to me at the end of the summer. He told me he couldn’t live with the Sword of Damocles over his head for the rest of his career at Mount Mary, and that it wasn’t his style anyway to lie and cheat. He informed me of the affair, and that you and he were getting divorced.”

Dear God, she was going to have to talk about this? About something she’d refused to discuss with anyone but
her husband? “Jared would do that.”

“Your family had been through so much. Jared had some of the life crushed out of him when your brothers-in-law were killed. I decided not to take any action. I’m not sure I even could. The woman had been his student, but I understand the affair didn’t start until after she graduated.”

“Yes,” she barely got out. “I understood that, too.” She still struggled
with the similarities of what had happened with her and Jared getting together after she finished school, and then he did it with another woman.

“I made a judgment call for a man I like and respect. And for a family I admire. I don’t regret that. What I do regret is that Ms. Ashford was accepted back into our Mount Mary family. Did you know about it?”

“No.”

“Does Jared?”

“He hasn’t
said anything to me if he does.”

“I left the final decision to the committee before I went on a holiday. Had I seen her status before letters were sent out, I would have tried to block her acceptance.”

“That’s kind of you, John.”

“Now you’ll have to deal with this.”

She raised her chin in an effort of such false bravado it was laughable. “I will. I’m an adult. I can handle this.”

“Thank you for being gracious about the situation. For not demanding we try to retract the acceptance.”

“That’s not my style.” She shrugged. “I wish it hadn’t happened, and I hope I don’t have contact with her, but it is what it is.” She stood and he did, too. “Thank you for alerting me. Alerting us. We won’t let you down.”

“I know you won’t. If there’s anything else I can do…”

“I’m fine.”

With her head held high, Ana walked out of his office. In the hall, her body began to tremble. Luckily, she made it to the ladies’ room without breaking down. Once there, she collapsed onto a small couch in a sitting area and took in deep breaths. What was she going to do now? Remembered pain assaulted her. Crippled her, as it had then.

Covering her face with her hands, her
mind spun her back to years ago. Things were impossibly tense between her and Jared…

Ana waited until Opal went to school, then she said, “We have to talk.”

Still despondent over the guys’ deaths and Ana’s inability to respond to him, he snapped, “I have a class.”

“Not till later.” The college was in summer session and he’d purposely set up his classes at a decent hour.

“I’ve got
preparation to do for it. Don’t you have meetings today?”

“In a few hours. Jared, this isn’t working between us. We’re frayed to our nerve endings.”

He slammed his briefcase on the table. “I told you what we should do. Go to therapy. It might help.”

“I can’t tell this to my sisters. How can I confess it to a stranger?”

“Sweetheart, listen to yourself. There’s nothing to
confess
. It’s a condition that afflicts, I might add, a lot of men! They go to seek help when they can’t get it up.”

“Or take a pill.”

“A temporary solution. Look, I’ll find the right person. Make the appointment. You just have to show up.”

“I can’t…”

He stalked out of the house, shut the door hard and tore out of the driveway. Ana cried all morning. What was wrong with her? Why wouldn’t
she seek help? She could start by telling one of her sisters the truth, then she could go to therapy with Jared. She’d pick Magdalena who understood everything. Or Sofia who had such powers of insight into human nature.

Feeling more positive after her catharsis, Ana showered, put on a peach sundress and strappy sandals and headed over to the school. There was time to see Jared before his class.
Her steps were lighter as she made her way to his office.

Hmm. The door was closed. Maybe he was in a meeting. She went to take a peek through the blinds on the window and found them closed tight. He could be working. She knocked.

From inside she heard a low murmur of voices. He hadn’t said he had an appointment. Something niggled at her. So she knocked again. More voices. Now she was
getting worried.

“Jared, it’s me, Ana. I know you’re meeting with someone, but I need to see you for a moment.” He’d be happy about her decision and wouldn’t mind the interruption.

More waiting. She was just about to knock a third time when the door opened, but only a foot. He didn’t look any different than he had when he’d left two hours ago. Yet he did. His hair, too long now, was messy.
Okay, there was a bit of a wind outside. His cheeks were red. “Hi.” His voice was gravelly. Like it got after sex. Jared. Sex. Jared. Sex. Oh, my God.

Without saying more, she pushed open the door. Because her action surprised him, she managed to get a full view of the room. Once again, nothing appeared out of place. A woman sat in a chair in front of his desk, her back to them. Ana scanned
the room. The outside blinds were closed, too. And a blanket she’d bought for the couch was bunched up on the floor.

And she knew.

“Jared?”

“Honey, let’s go somewhere and talk.”

“Tell me this isn’t what it looks like.”

He said nothing. The woman—the woman she’d learn was Valerie Ashford—remained silent, faceless.

“Jared. Tell me!”

Finally, he said simply, “I can’t tell
you that, Ana. I’m so sorry.”

She stumbled away and raced down the hall. He called after her but she reached the stairway and flung open the door. He was right behind her as she started down.

“Ana, wait.”

She kept going. So did he.

And then she tripped. Tumbled down several steps until she hit the landing. From the floor, she looked up at him, her lip bleeding, her foot twisted.
It was then she realized their marriage was over…

Straightening now, Ana stood and went to the sink to throw cold water on her face. Staring into the mirror, she took a hard look at herself. Was she still the vulnerable woman who’d lain broken and bleeding, physically and emotionally, as she had been back then? Had she learned anything in the past two long and lonely years? Was she going to
succumb to the guilt and anger and shock again, which was her reaction to his affair? Or was she going to woman up and deal with this better?