The Will to Love (18 page)

Chapter Sixteen

Will

WILL COULDN’T WAIT to take Laurel out to celebrate but even a nice quiet dinner at the Boca Park location of Gordon Biersch in Summerlin couldn’t cheer her up completely.

They sat outside so he could smoke while he enjoyed their famous Czech Pilsner. Meanwhile, Laurel opted for the Märzen.

The outdoors area was cozy and although the sky was a clear blue and the sun shined as it made a slow descent to west, it was only fifty degrees. Heat lamps, placed strategically around the outdoors area along with holiday decorations, kept the restaurant cozy and it had a romantic feel even if they were dining together in the middle of the afternoon.

“Babe, I know you don’t like to play dirty and it must have been hard to see Sasha like that but it had to be done. This is your life—your
reputation
—we’re talking about.” He swigged from his pilsner and sat back as he put out his cigarette.

“I know but…she looked so…so
broken
.” Laurel faced him after she drank down half her Bavarian lager and placed the glass back on the table.

Will’s face scrunched up in annoyance at the thought of Sasha being broken in any way; she was s sneaky bitch and a damn good actress. “I honestly don’t know what about. She wouldn’t have the faintest clue of what you’ve been through and yet, you’re still so strong. She should be commending you, not trying to take away your fortune.”

“Well, welcome to the lifestyle of the rich, privileged and prestigious crowd. Sasha has this warped sense she deserves our parents’ fortune more than I do. I didn’t go to a prestigious university—like her—and I hated high school. She doesn’t believe I’ve done anything with my life but squander every chance our parents have given me and as far as she’s concerned, I merely made a bit of money by laying on my back doing the kind of poor trash shit the less than cash rich ‘society kids’ do to make it. I ended up with you, didn’t I?” She finished the rest of her lager and ordered another one from the waiter while she continued to study the menu.

“So what if you did, Laurel?” Will leaned forward on the table. “I’m not gonna sugarcoat the situation for you but you did what you thought you had to do to survive. I know what that feels like and even though I have money now and am in one of the hottest rock bands on the planet, I can’t escape my upper middle-class background.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being upper middle-class, Will. Besides, you’re aware of the double standards for men and women in society. What I did qualifies me as a skank, whore, slut—whatever you want to call me. You did what you had to do to get by. It’s a big difference.” She sighed again as her finger traced around the rim of the glass.

“Listen, you were the one who told me we can’t change the past. We only have the present and the future. Everything between you and Sasha isn’t broken beyond repair. You two can still have a functional relationship. Grant and I—well, we’re bandmates—and I’ve had a stickier relationship with a certain member of Scarlet Fever. Jaden and I don’t get along at all but when we play together, it’s complete magic. We complement each other in terms of our playing and we have great on stage chemistry. Too bad it’s a lie.”

“True.” Laurel clapped her hands together. “I don’t want our holiday season ruined by my own personal drama. Do you want me to see if we can have Christmas dinner with Syd and Kaz? I can ask if they don’t mind.”

“No. I want you to talk to your sister. Grant will be your brother-in-law soon and we all need to be able to get along…with each other. We can’t continue this cold war between us all. You have to face her eventually so why don’t you just…swallow your pride and just mend bridges? I’ll work on Grant tomorrow if you work on your sister. Deal?”

Laurel rolled her eyes. “Fine. We have a final dress fitting for Syd’s wedding tomorrow. She insisted Christmas Eve since she and Kaz are tying the knot on the thirtieth.”

“That’s perfect. Use the time to at least apologize for the embarrassment she faced today and hopefully she will realize the error of her ways. Today didn’t have anything to do with you but her messing around with the wrong people.”

“I’ll do that, honey.” She grabbed his hand and clutched it tightly. “How did you get so intelligent?”

“Hey, I just want you to enjoy the next two years we’ll be here and I don’t want you fighting with your sister over something so trivial. You’re the one who reminds me of how life is so fleeting. I want you to marry me because if we only have each other for the rest of our lives then that is fine with me. I love you Laurel Munsen.”

Will reached into his pocket as Laurel’s eyes widened, her hazel-green eyes gorgeous and bright with unshed tears.

“You’re shitting me.”

“No, I’m not.” He placed the Cartier box on the table and pushed it toward her.

She picked up the box and opened it to display a beautiful platinum band surrounded by diamonds and a solitary diamond at least three carats surrounded by miniature diamonds, identical to the diamonds that covered the platinum band. She held it with delicate fingers before she handed it back to him.

Laurel held out her left hand and wiggled her fingers. “Put it on my finger.” She smiled brightly as he slid it on her finger. “You know I would have put up a fight if I saw a blue Tiffany bag.”

“Yeah, I kinda got that with you having a mother who is Creole and Dutch—”

“South African…my grandfather was an Afrikaner, or a Boer, as they’re known. Another secret I hid from you. He’s like the third cousin to the Van Cleef family…the same one that owns Van Cleef and Arpels.”

“The diamond company?”

Laurel smiled. “Yep. Buddy, this better be a conflict-free diamond or I will raise the biggest stink. And you know I will.”

“I asked the saleswoman about this particular piece of jewelry since it is a Cartier Destinée Solitaire piece and she assured me it was a conflict-free diamond. I didn’t believe her so I also spoke with the manager and he was able to give me a complete history of where these particular diamonds come from, how they are mined and then he urged me to make a donation to a Sierra Leone charity that they support. All rings also come with a certificate of authenticity known as the System of Warranties.” Will kissed her hand and held it within his own.

“Thank you. After the day we’ve had, and it’s not even half way over, this is the best gift you could have given me, ever. I love you and I love the ring. It is perfect.” She leaned over and kissed his lips quickly before they both picked up their glasses of beer.

“Cheers, sweetheart.”

“Cheers, babe.”

Will clinked his glass against hers and they both finished their beers before calling the waiter over to order food and more alcohol.

He couldn’t help think about what a wonderful day they’d had after he proposed and all he wanted to do was freeze this moment in his life. The next few days might get rough but as long as that ring remained on Laurel’s finger, it reminded him there was still hope in the world and nothing was ever as bad as it seemed.

Will knew it would take more than just a talk or two for him and Grant to repair the damage between them but they were guys. He’d probably fight with Grant and maybe a few punches would be thrown but then everything would be okay and they would be buddies again. They probably wouldn’t ever be as close as they’d been before this whole fiasco but he could forgive even if he’d never forget. That was fine with him. He hated conflict but he could handle a truce.

Laurel sat across from him and he realized he’d never let her hand ago. She didn’t object and actually had so much fun, they didn’t even notice the paparazzo guy as he clicked away at the two of them sitting there and speaking animatedly with one another.

He was determined that nothing would ruin this day for him and the rest of the evening passed without incident.

Chapter Seventeen

Laurel

“YOU’VE GOT TO be fucking kidding me!”

Sydney walked around to face me in her unconventional black lace and ivory silk wedding gown. “How the fuck is this gown loose? You were supposed to be my Maid of Honor but the fuckin’ seamstress messed up. She took Talia’s measurements for this gown and took your measurements for the bridesmaids dresses. This is so fucked. Kaz chose Jaden to be the best man and Talia won’t want to see him.”

The gorgeous, one shoulder black lace gown by Emilio Pucci was beautiful and cost more than Syd’s wedding gown, but it was in fact too big. I was a size four but this gown was much more sized for someone a size six.

Talia was the perfect size six.

She wore a bridesmaid dress—a black lace floor-length, silk bodice gown that she couldn’t zip up—which, would actually fit me perfectly.

“Listen, I wouldn’t ordinarily want to be standing across from Jaden but this is your
wedding
, Syd, and I’ll make the exception...this time. As long as that skank bitch doesn’t turn up, everything is cool and the gang—got it?”

“Well, that’s not an issue because I didn’t invite Faith and Kaz has already informed Jaden she would not be a welcome addition at our wedding.”

Sasha laughed out loud. “You don’t need Faith to attend, we already have a skank onboard.”

Jerrica looked at Talia who looked from her best friend to Syd and then to Sasha while my cheeks burned from embarrassment.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Syd questioned as she turned around to face my sister. “My wedding will be a skank-free zone.”

“Not necessarily.”

That was it; I’d come to the limit with that bitch.

I strolled over to Sasha and grabbed her by the arm before I whipped her around to face me. “Listen to me, bitch, call me a ‘skank’ one more time and I will kick your ass all over this bridal shop!”

Syd walked over to us. “What the
hell
is going on between you two?”

“Nothing I can’t handle with my sister. Can you give us a second, sweetie?” I frog-marched her several feet away from the other women.

My sister snatched her arm from my grip and stepped back a few feet. “I was humiliated yesterday at that meeting and so was Grant. Not only did they wipe my phone but now my fiancé feels disgraced due to what happened to him yesterday.”

“No one knows about what happened yesterday besides Kaz and he’s been sworn to secrecy so I don’t know why Grant is licking his wounds. What did you expect me to do? Allow you to humiliate me to Mom and Dad? What? You didn’t think I would fight back when I knew that Karl would have killed you and Grant himself if you ever exposed what I did with him.”

“Don’t be so melodramatic!” Sasha crossed her arms against her chest. “I wouldn’t have put your life at risk but that doesn’t mean you get to buck the rules and do whatever you want while you still get your Trust. How is that fair to me when I did everything right and you still came out on top? It pisses me off how everyone has always worshipped you yet I’ve been treated like some discarded dishrag!”

“What are you talking about?” I shook my head sadly. “Is that what this is about? Old rivalries from our
childhood
? News flash: you won! Mom and Dad think you’re the perfect child and I’m always gonna be the outcast, no matter what I do.”

“Did you have to fuck Grant?” she whispered in an angry voice. “My God, can I have
nothing
to myself?”

I glared at her as if she’d gone bat shit crazy. “Um, news flash…Grant and I had a one night stand
years
ago, Sasha. You act like this happened while you two were going out and I would never…” I trailed off before I broke down in tears. “What do you want from me? To grovel and say I’m sorry yesterday happened? I won’t. I can’t. I had to do it or you wouldn’t have been living to see a new year. You can believe me or not. I give up, I’m through. Believe what you want about me—think my life has been so much easier than yours. Hell, tell yourself anything you want about me if it helps you sleep better at night.”

I wiped the tears away from my eyes and walked back over to Syd as I sat down on the bench in my oversized dress and tried not to cry.

“What’s going on between you two? I don’t remember it being this bad since Sasha graduated and ‘forgot’ to send you an invite.”

“Jesus Christ, Syd, when has it not been bad between her and I? She puts up with me because she has to and I put up with her for the very same reason. We’re never gonna win any ‘siblings of the year’ award for being super close.” I wrapped my arm around my best friend. “This isn’t about her or I—this is about your special day and I won’t let anything ruin it, not even the back and forth bickering going on between us, all right?”

“Just as long as you’re okay because I really don’t appreciate her calling you a skank. You’ve been by my side through thick and thin. I would have never been able to survive my separation from Kaz without you and Talia. You are still my best friend and no one has taken your place. I couldn’t imagine you being evil to anyone.”

“I’m not and I haven’t been…not intentionally. Sasha will get over whatever is bothering her. She’s gotten her feelings hurt and woe betide anyone and anything when my sister feels like the world has wronged her. She’s got too much of a temper she usually keeps on ice but when she explodes, look out.”

Syd laughed out loud. “Well tell Sasha to keep it in check. The only reason why I made her a bridesmaid at all is because she’s your sister and I didn’t want her to feel left out but if she continues to belittle you or call you a skank then she’s gone.”

I looked into her blue-gray eyes and smiled wryly. “I’ll let her know.”

SASHA WAS THE first to leave so I didn’t get a chance to warn her about her behavior before she left the bridal shop.

I stayed behind and helped Syd, Talia, and Jerrica polish off a couple bottles of Cristal while Talia and I traded dresses to make sure each other’s fit.

Syd was a bit bummed out I wouldn’t be her Maid of Honor but I was more than happy just being a bridesmaid.

It was during this dress changing Syd noticed my ring, screamed out loud and ordered two bottles of Cristal while we celebrated my engagement.

“Where are you going after we finish up here?” Syd smiled through her buzz and appeared to glow with happiness as she wrapped her arm around my shoulders.

“Home…to see my fiancé. It’s Christmas Eve after all.”

“Nonsense! Come to our house and have dinner! I’ll call Kaz to let him know. We’re staying in Summerlin tonight. It’s a full house tomorrow and Damira is flying in from L.A. with Xander and Kris. A regular Ozzie and Harriet we are, wouldn’t you say?”

“I was going to say a
normal
Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne…and then I thought about it and have decided there
is
no such thing. How about a white version of Beyoncé and Jay-Z? Or a hard rockin’ version of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin?” I suggested.

Syd’s face fell. “How did you know so much about Kaz’s background? The comparison to a white version of Jay-Z is fitting…he’s done some bad shit, girl.”

My high suddenly left me as I stood, and slid back into my pair of boyfriend jeans and a black cashmere top. “What do you mean?”

“You know who his dad is, right? And how he and Jaden are half-brothers? Well, he told me initially he never had anything to do with the MC but that’s bullshit. He was and is a full-fledged member of the Lucifer’s Saints. I—” she placed her hand over her heart, “Sydney Landvik, heir to a multi-billion dollar fortune, am about to marry Kasper Gillian Cox, common biker trash.”

“Christ on a cracker.” I sat down next to her and slid an arm over her shoulders. “Sometimes we shouldn’t judge people by their pasts but what they can provide us in the future. I’ve done…some deplorable things, Syd. That’s what my sister was kickin’ off about earlier today and part of me wants to hate her but another part of me knows she’s right.”

Syd leaned against me, her eyes more gray than blue. “How’s that? You’ve been nothing but a decent sister and a kick ass best friend. I know about you and Faith and the whole…
whatever
…you did with Karl but you two were also an item and it wasn’t like you’re a whore. You’re not anything like that nasty bitch who thinks she’s better than everyone just because she’s married to Kanye West—talk about a skank…she and Faith could compete in the Skank Olympics!”

We both laughed out loud. “Yeah, I was going out with Karl at the time but he was a married man and I still did those DVDs and they’re out there. Maybe not for the whole world to see but it kind of skeeves me out thinkin’ about some old dude jackin’ off to me in a DP scene with Karl and Seven…ya know?”

My best friend looked at me with a seriously drunken look on her face before she burst out laughing.

“What? It’s not funny, Syd!”

She laughed even harder as her face turned scarlet and she slid to the floor.

“Fine, so it is kinda fuckin’ funny but you’re supposed to be my back-up bitch and tell me that what I did wasn’t so bad and I’m not a skank or some nasty ass cuntbag and I’m so
not
feelin’ the love right now.” I helped her off the floor before she proceeded to slip on her fitted magenta sweater made from the softest vicuña.

“Listen to me because I may be drunk but…none of that matters. Will loves you to death and you have such a sweet man. For God’s sake, he gave up
cock
for you—and I’m not sure you understand the magnitude of that because I love you, babe, but no way in
hell
would I give up cock to eat your pussy for the rest of my life. Sorry, not gonna happen.”