TITAN (18 page)

“No matter what happens, Jordy,
things will never change between us because of that. We already went through
the stories you had to ignore about me, remember? This is not easy, nothing
about it is, but we will handle it. My CD went triple platinum. That means
press for a long time, and appearances, shit like that.

Maybe, you know, it wouldn’t hurt
to start being
us
outside of the bedroom and the kitchen and the living
room…”

“And the hill and the grounds and
the pool. The golf course, the gazebo and all of the guest rooms and the
library. Oh, and the stairs and the elevator and the laundry room,” she
continued for him, “Well, there goes me going back to work,” she said, sad.

“You were thinking about it?” Tite
asked, curious.

“Yes, I can’t mooch off of you
forever. I don’t like it.”

“It doesn’t bother me.”

“It bothers me. I am not the help,
babe.”

“I get it,” he said, tossing a piece
of her hair away from his mouth.

“What now Tite?” She was truly
scared, he could see it.

“Now, you see it all,” he said,
just as worried.

The SUV came to a stop at the back entrance
of the auditorium. There were fans waiting on him. She was used to seeing a few
lingering at the house gates, but had never had to confront them head on this
way.

Jordy had spent the majority of her
day with a stylist and a make up crew. Pictures of them kissing in New York had surfaced
over three months ago and Titan decided that their first appearance together
would be at the awards show.

He was up for six awards and was
going to perform.

Jordy had thrown up four times
during the ‘getting ready’ process.

She wasn’t ready for all of this
but didn’t want Tite to know.

She went along with whatever he
said.

A part of her was excited, but the
other dreaded the critical comments that might be made about her. When a man
had a choice of any woman in the world and chose a plain Jane, as she thought
of herself, he was bound to catch some heat.

 Fan letters had poured in,
showing support of their relationship. She was happy about that, and he was
relieved.

When the press started digging into
her past and discovered she was an insurance agent, the headlines started to
get a little bit more aggressive and demeaning.

Tite refused to let her see most of
what the press was printing, but she could easily get to it on the internet.

She had decided to go back to
college online, in lieu of returning to work.

She had applied for online
scholarships and maxed out her credit cards for books, refusing to let Titan
pay for anything.

She would take out student loans as
long as it took to finish. She had already finished her first few years
previously, before Tite, and was determined to finish now. It was more out of
fear, than anything else. She would earn a business degree.

Titan was her whole life now and if
anything ever happened between them she had to have a way of taking care of
herself.

She gave up her apartment and moved
in with him completely. It just had to happen, neither one of them had
reservations about it because she never went home anyway.

She called the Schaffer’s and had
started to explain to them why she wouldn’t be able to return to work after a
six month leave, but they were already very well aware. Calls had been pouring
in from Titan fans. The press was at the door daily, trying to get a glimpse of
her. The Schaffer’s, while irritated, were excited for her and told her she was
family and whenever she wanted to return, she had her job.

Her old friends had come out of the
woodwork, blowing up her phone and her social media page. She had to delete it
all.

She was just as trapped as he was.

She had lost her freedom with the
click of a camera.

She had become the most mysterious
and popular woman on the planet.  She read comments on his you tube video,
The Witch
stating,

“She’s not that pretty.”

“I wonder what’s so special about
her.”

She thought of herself as pretty
enough, but enough to be Titan’s?

Never.

She had chosen a sleeveless, short
black dress with a sloping V back, lined with tiny black gemstones. The stylist
gasped when he put it on her and wouldn’t let her try on anything else.

She had been plucked, waxed,
airbrushed and she was exhausted.

When she saw the final outcome, she
couldn’t believe her reflection.

Tite stared at Jordy with awe. She
looked perfect. He was dying to tear it all off of her. Even though he knew the
public would approve of her, it made him ill at ease to look at her. He didn’t
like it. It wasn’t her. He resigned himself to the fact that all women didn’t
look themselves on nights like this. He was so worried about her, he felt like
he was sending her out in front of the firing squad. He wasn’t as nervous about
performing as he was for her. He had never brought a woman out with him in
public, ever. He shook his head at how things had changed. How she had changed
him. He looked at her again.

“Jake, make another trip around the
block.”

He turned to Jordy. “You do not
have to do this. We can keep things the way they are. If you get out of this
car everything changes, you become a public figure.”

“If I want to be with you isn’t it
time I saw this side of your life?”

“Everything will change.”

“Good, I am getting tired of the
same old, boring mansion life,” she smiled at him.

“Jake.”

Jake nodded and the SUV pulled back
up to the entrance.

“TITTTTANNNNNN!”

Jordy heard the first scream and
almost retreated back into the SUV. She took a huge breath. He exited the
vehicle, he grabbed her hand. When she got out, the small crowd at the back
entrance erupted in chaos.  

Titan didn’t smile. He just walked directly
to the back entrance door. Jordy smiled at a few of them, in complete awe. When
they were safe and free from the screaming fans, they were greeted by all kinds
of people. It was mostly the show crew other music artists, some actors and
actresses. Jordy was feeling faint again but pushed it down. She would not do
this to him.

Tite seemed to be extremely polite
to all of them, which shocked Jordy. She could tell he also had better rapport
with some of them, than with others. She was shocked at how many of them
greeted him. When they finally made it to the dressing room, Tunez was waiting,
along with six of Tite’s crew, including Jessie, who let out a huge whistle for
Jordy.

“Damn, Jordy!” It was all he could
say.

“Thanks, Jessie.”

“Babe,” Tite turned to her, “this
is all going to go really fast once it gets started. Jessie will show you to
our seats, I have some stuff to go over with the crew. I will be with you right
before it all starts, okay? And did I tell you that you look like a Barbie with
no ass?” He kissed her temple and gestured to Jessie to help her to her seat.

Jordy smiled at him nervously and
followed Jessie’s lead. She spotted a caterer backstage with a tray of
champagne and couldn’t help herself. She grabbed two and downed one. She
instantly felt a little less nervous until she saw the auditorium filling
quickly with movie stars and other rappers she had seen her whole life on
screen and in the papers. Jessie sat her front row next to Tunez’s wife,
Shelia. They had never met and introduced themselves right away.

“Jordy, it’s so good to finally
meet you, my prayers have been answered,” Shelia said, adding, “Now Titan can
finally calm down and stop getting my husband in so much trouble.” She winked
at Jordy.

“I am glad, too.” It was all she
could say, taking it all in.

“Don’t worry, sweetie, really. You
have to take that look off of your face. The world is watching you tonight. Let
them see your poker face,” she warned.

“Can you please tell me what the
hell that looks like?” Jordy asked, terrified.

“Try almost mean but with a hint of
happy,” Shelia said, laughing hysterically. “Oh girl, you will be fine, I
promise.” She kept laughing and Jordy couldn’t help it but started right along
with her.

“Good.” Shelia said. “That’s a
little better.”

“How do people do this?”

“Just like you are right now,
Jordy, but with a poker face. Look around, do you see the girls with the
compacts making sure their lipsticks are perfect, adjusting their dresses,
making fake funny comments to their spouses. It’s surreal to all of them,
except for the ones who look bored. They are what I like to call
the seniors
.
They have attended one too many of these and are just ready to be announced and
go home.”

“Can I just say I am glad I am
sitting with you?”

“Well, I was curious myself. Titan
has never, ever been this involved with anything but his music. I was getting
worried.”

“I have no idea how it happened
myself,” Jordy, said truthfully.

“Whatever you did, Jordy, it worked,”
she said, as if Jordy had some secret she needed to share.

“I bought milk at a gas station,”
Jordy said, laughing at the thought.

Shelia looked puzzled but before
she could ask her what she meant, the lights went low. Jordy saw the camera
crew take their places. There was one set right in front of her. Her nerves
were starting to get the best of her. She heard the announcer commence the
awards and the lights went completely dark. She heard the beginning of
The
Witch
start to play. Except it wasn’t the track, it was it was P.M.
Dawn!  He hadn’t told her he was doing that one with them tonight! The
lights came on and the duo was singing the chorus. The whole auditorium erupted
into cheers as Titan rose from center stage. She was absolutely shocked. She
had never seen him on stage, ever, and here he was, with P.M. Dawn on stage,
doing a song he had written for her. It was too much. Jordy felt the faint
coming again but pushed it down. He didn’t tell her he would be first to
perform. He had done it again. He had gotten her. She had no idea how she had
gotten here. It was unreal. This was so far from the life they lived together
she felt almost like she had entered a different world.

I feel for her, I really do/

Titan was rapping on stage, killing
every single lyric. The fans up front were going insane.

She was going insane.

She almost wished she was up there,
holding out her hand for just a chance to touch him. This was not Phillip.

This was Titan.

He never looked her direction and
it didn’t bother Jordy. The camera was on her now and Shelia leaned in.

“Jordy, poker face. Quick,” Shelia
said, almost snapping at her.

Jordy leaned over to Shelia and
smiled. “I think I just
peed
my pants.” Shelia burst
out laughing. “I get it,” she said, “Just hold on a little longer.”

Jordy just sat in the chair, bit
her lower lip and moved her head slightly along with Shelia as if they had been
girlfriends for years. She was floored but tried her best not to show it. He
was amazing. He was perfect.

No less than what she expected.

When a majority of
The Witch
was done, he broke into his newest single, Escapades. Tunez and Gina joined him
on stage. It was amazing.

 Jordy knew no one would be
able to top it. When it was over, she clapped and cheered like Jordy would. She
didn’t give a damn what the world thought, it was her first time seeing him and
she let it show. The whole place erupted once again and got on their feet. His
album had gone triple platinum.

He was blowing everyone else away
on the charts.
The Witch
was up for song of the year. Jordy realized she
was in love with two men.

The rap legend and the man.

She was thankful for their years
together beneath all of this. She looked around and people were still hollering
for him. She saw the lights come on fully and realized this must be a
commercial break that you never see on T.V. She confirmed it with Shelia and
ran to the restroom backstage. The champagne she downed was catching up to her.

When she got back to her seat Titan
was there, looking around, uneasy. When he saw her approaching, his face eased
a little.

“I had to pee,” she whispered in
his ear, “That was fucking awesome and I love you and I want you naked, right
now.”

He smiled at her comment and looked
at her, amused at her excitement.

“Tite really, you had P.M. Dawn?
Was that for me?”

“As much as I would like to say ‘Yes,
Jordy, it was just for you’, I can’t.  No, that was the plan with the show
all along.”

“Oh, just the same, no one is going
to top that. No fucking way.”

“Ha ha, Jordy, you are a little
biased.”

“Let ‘em try, Tite,” she said, sure
of it.

The lights went low again and Jordy
got the greatest concert of her life. This was one of those shows where there
were so many performances that you couldn’t get bored or tired. She was shocked
by all the talent in the room, the lights, the sparks, the dancing. When it cam
time for rap song of the year, Jordy saw the camera point at Tite.

“And the winner is...Titan for
The
Witch,
” the whole crowd erupted.  Titan looked at Jordy and whispered
in her ear, “
Thanks,
Witch.”

Jordy smiled and started clapping
for him as he made his way to the stage. He grabbed the award and Jessie and
Onyx joined him on stage.

“It’s been an awesome year for me,
musically. I got to work with some of the best there is. I would like to thank
Jeff, Jessie and Onyx, and P.M. Dawn for the beat. Thank you.”

Jordy clapped for him as he exited
the stage and commercial break started again. He didn’t join her again at their
seats and she knew the show was almost over. Maybe he was stuck back stage? She
looked at Shelia with a look of ‘holy shit!’

“This has been so cool.”

“Yeah, it always is for me. Tunez and
I don’t make many appearances together,” she said, almost sad.

“I didn’t mind it before, but
now
,
he is taking me to this as long as he makes music,” Jordy chuckled.

“Amen.” Shelia said. “Jordy, it was
nice meeting you but Tunez already got what he’s going to get and he is
probably waiting in the car. He is turning into a senior.”