Tracie Peterson (20 page)

Nearly twenty-four hours and dozens of phone calls to the family later, Ashley regained consciousness. She had come back gradually—staying awake a little longer each time, answering questions as they checked her responses.

“Jack,” she whispered his name as the last nurse left the room.

“I’m here, Ash,” he told her and went quickly to her side.

She looked awful. Her face was swollen, her right eye blackened from colliding against the steering wheel. Several stitches had been made just above her right eyebrow and left uncovered.

“What happened?” she asked.

Jack had already told her three times about the accident, but as was often the case with victims of this kind of trauma, she didn’t remember or retain the knowledge.

“You were in a car accident. Don’t you remember?”

Ashley shook her head ever so slightly. “Where?”

“On the interstate—up north.”

“North?” she seemed to question, then nodded and repeated the word as if this explained everything.

“The kids?” Her voice became panicked and Jack patted her reassuringly.

“The kids were in school. You were alone.”

She nodded and let out a raspy breath. “Am I going to be all right?”

“Yes,” Jack said, his voice catching, unable to continue.

Ashley closed her eyes and faded off to sleep. Jack didn’t know if it was from sheer exhaustion of fighting to recover or from the morphine that coursed through her body. Either way, he could no longer bear the misery he felt. Sobbing, he sunk into the hard leather chair at her bedside and cried.

“Oh, Ashley. My sweet Ashley.”

“You can’t keep mourning her, Jack,” Mattie told him, leading him to the waiting room. “Ashley’s recovery looks good. You have to focus on the hopefulness of this situation.”

“She’s lost so much,” Jack replied. “The baby.”

“I know,” Mattie said, patting his hand.

“She can’t have any more children. That will devastate her.”

“She’s stronger than you give her credit for.”

Jack shook his head. “But maybe I’m not that strong.”

Mattie nodded. “Everyone has been focused on Ashley. But you’ve lost a child as well. Jack, there are no words I can offer that
can make that pain go away.”

“I just want her back,” he murmured.

“She’ll be home before you know it.”

“I want everything to be like it was,” Jack added. “But it will forever be changed.”

“Change isn’t always bad, Jack. You can both get through this together. I know you love Ashley and she loves you. You have to help each other through this.”

“If she’ll let me,” Jack replied. “If she’ll let me.”

Deirdre waved good-bye as Morgan trudged up the steps to Heritage School. Another two weeks and they would be out for the summer. Another few days after that and Deirdre would pack Morgan off to Grammy’s farm and she and Dave would take a much-needed vacation. At least they would if Ashley’s recovery continued and if Dave’s legal case was completed.

She frowned at the thought of the case. His job was monopolizing his life, and yet Dave continued to push himself. He seldom talked anymore and he isolated himself from her and Morgan on most occasions. Deirdre had gotten tired of fighting it and finally gave up. She simply steered out of his path and cut him as much slack as she could. She had meals ready in case he wanted to eat but said nothing when he refused them and locked himself in his study.

Reaching into her purse, Deirdre pulled out the black case that held her mother-in-law’s necklace. Because of all the problems in her life, she’d forgotten all about pawning the necklace to replace her household money.

She’d arranged an appointment at one of the better pawnshops in town and had decided to make her way there as soon as Morgan was in school for the day. This way, she reasoned, she’d have plenty of time to get to the bank and then go grocery shopping before she needed to be back at the school to pick her daughter up.

Deirdre had planned to have this done before now, but with
Ashley’s accident and Dave so preoccupied, she hadn’t felt pressed to do it. In another day or so she could ask Dave for the household money and then she would be able to go back and retrieve the necklace. But another day or two wouldn’t help her now. She needed money to pay all the small incidental things that should have been paid last week.

Pulling up in front of the pawnshop, she grimaced at how seedy everything looked. She’d been told this was a good place—a safe place to deal—yet it looked ominously threatening and made her skin crawl.

Refusing to give in to her fears, Deirdre made her way into the shop. She placed the black case on the counter and waited while the owner was summoned. A tiny elderly man emerged from the back room to greet her.

“I’m glad to meet you, Mrs. Woodward,” he said congenially. “Let’s see what you have.” He opened the case, then took out a jeweler’s loop and held it to his eye. Picking up the necklace with his free hand, he carefully scrutinized the jewels in the necklace. “A most unusual piece,” he commented.

Deirdre glanced around nervously. Taking an uneasy breath, she asked, “So what can you loan me on it? I only need it for a couple of days.”

He said nothing while he continued examining the piece, leaving Deirdre to wonder if the necklace was nothing more than costume jewelry. Maybe she had been foolish to even bring it here.

Glancing at her watch, she saw that only a few minutes had passed. It felt more like hours. Finally the old man put down the necklace and the loop.

“Five hundred dollars,” he said.

“I beg your pardon?” Deirdre was certain she hadn’t heard him right.

“The piece is worth much more, of course. But I can only offer you five hundred.”

She nodded. “That’s enough.”

He went to his desk and began taking out papers. “We’ll need to fill these out.”

Five hundred dollars! Her worries were easily lifted as she considered what she would do. With the extra money she could go to the casino and earn back what she had lost. Surely she wouldn’t be that unlucky two times in a row. Her spirits raised.
With the extra two hundred I can play a few hands of blackjack and double it. It won’t take long at all to win five hundred dollars
, she thought, even though she’d never won that much money from gambling.

She finished her dealings at the pawnshop, promising to be back by Thursday in order to retrieve the piece. Deirdre returned to her car feeling like a new woman. She had five hundred dollars in her pocket and a confidence that suggested she had already won the casino’s jackpot.

From the moment she wheeled into the parking lot to her first steps inside the casino, Deirdre felt her excitement build. She was going to win the money she needed and maybe even more. Wouldn’t it be a relief to Dave if she could come home with an extra thousand dollars?

She bought chips and proceeded to the blackjack table knowing that somehow everything would be all right. She had a feeling about this and smiled confidently as the dealer put down the cards. She held at nineteen.

She won the hand and ten dollars and beamed a smile at the dealer. “This time let’s make it a little more interesting,” she said and made a twenty-five-dollar bet.

The afternoon wore on and all thoughts of buying groceries or going to the bank disappeared. Deirdre lost all track of time, as was the intent of the casino owners. There were no clocks, no windows to tell what time of day it was. Just the bright lights and noisy activities associated with the casino floor. She had downed several sodas and the surge of sugar and caffeine coursed through her system. It only added to her excitement.

“You’re sure doing great today, Deirdre,” the handsome young
dealer told her. “Lady Luck must sure be with you today.”

She grinned. “I knew it would be a good day.”

From across the room at the slot machines someone was yelling in victory. Clanging bells and lights were going off to indicate another winner.

“Guess I’m not the only one.”

The dealer nodded as Deirdre put down a gutsy bet of one hundred dollars. “Let’s see just how much luck I have.” She laughed as she realized her cards totaled twenty, then frowned as the dealer turned over twenty-one.

“Sorry about that,” he said with a sympathetic smile. “Wanna try again?”

She pushed out her chips less enthusiastically this time. “A minor setback. Let’s try it again.”

But again she lost.

Deirdre took a gulp of the icy soda and steadied her jittery nerves. Just one more hand, she told herself.
One more and I’m sure to be back on track.

She bet fifty dollars and felt her stomach do a flip. It just had to work!

And it did. She smiled and suddenly all was right with the world. This was going to work out after all. She just knew it.

But it didn’t.

By the time Deirdre looked at her watch and realized she was over half an hour late to pick up Morgan, she had lost everything she’d come in with. All five hundred dollars were gone. Just like that.

She dragged herself out to the car and sat in the front seat for several minutes. Feeling the start of some form of panic sweep over her, she shoved the key in the ignition and tried not to think about what had just happened.

Remembering Morgan, she picked up the cellular phone and called the school.

“This is Mrs. Woodward,” she said rather mechanically. “I’ve been having car trouble. I’m sorry for not calling sooner but I
couldn’t. I’ll be there in a few minutes to pick up Morgan.”

The secretary sympathized and promised it was not a problem. Deirdre felt guilty for the lie, but she could hardly explain that she’d just spent the afternoon in the casino.

The drive to Heritage School allowed Deirdre more time to reflect on what she’d just done. Was she completely out of control? Was she addicted to it like so many of those poor fools she’d made fun of with her girlfriends?

She thought over her actions. She was gambling alone—in secret. And she had lied to cover her actions, taking money away from her family and even pawning valuable jewelry to cover her losses.

“But I’m not addicted,” she told herself. “I just wanted to make that money back and I felt certain I could win.”

She pulled up to the school and shut off the car. She knew because of the lateness of the hour she’d have to go inside and explain the situation in more detail. Morgan would no doubt be playing in the principal’s office or somewhere nearby.

Burdened by her worry, Deirdre made her way inside.
What am I supposed to do now?
she wondered. I’m down by over eight hundred dollars. That’s more than I could ever explain to Dave and certainly more than I’ll ever manage to get my hands on through the household money.

“Mrs. Woodward!” the principal called in greeting. “I’m so sorry about your car trouble. What seemed to be the problem?”

Deirdre stared at the woman blankly for a moment. It was time to invent yet another lie. “It was something to do with the radiator. I just don’t understand cars.” At least that much was true.

Morgan came bounding up to her mother. “I’m hungry!” she announced.

Deirdre smiled with a contentment she didn’t feel. “Me too, sweetie. Let’s get your things together and go home and fix a snack.” Enthusiastically, Morgan raced off to retrieve her things.

“I’m really sorry about this,” Deirdre apologized. “The time just got away from me. I thought I could have things under control in
time to pick Morgan up.”

“No problem,” the principal assured her. “I had to be here until five.”

“Well, thank you for being so understanding,” Deirdre replied as Morgan rejoined them. “I promise it won’t happen again.”

That evening Dave Woodward maneuvered his car into the garage and turned off the engine. As the automatic garage door closed behind him, Dave wondered how in the world he’d ever make it through the evening. Exhaustion and mental duress drained him so completely that all he wanted to do was hide away in his office and never come out again.

Staring at the door to the house, he sighed. He’d been so harsh with Deirdre and Morgan that morning. He almost hated coming home to try to explain. Especially when there was no real explanation. He couldn’t tell them why he had acted the way he had. He couldn’t admit to the problems plaguing his mind.

Slowly he got out of the car, dragging his briefcase with him. He felt like throwing the burdensome thing through the garage window, but something inside him caused sanity to prevail.
If I can just get through this case . . . if I can just make everybody happy.
But he knew there was no way to do that. Someone would have to lose and someone would definitely win.

Coming into the house, Dave found a surprising silence. He glanced back out the door, noting that Deirdre’s car was parked there alongside his own. Maybe they were upstairs, he thought, deciding to slip into his office quietly before calling attention to the fact that he was home.

In his office, Dave gave the briefcase a toss onto his desk and began to shed his suitcoat and tie. He then walked back down the hall, suspicious of the solitude. He glanced at his watch. It was well before six. He sniffed the air. Deirdre wasn’t cooking anything, so maybe he could make it up to them by suggesting dinner out.

“Dee?” he called questioningly.

No answer. The downstairs appeared completely deserted.

Now he was starting to worry. Hurrying up the stairs, he paused by their bedroom door. He had just reached out to turn the knob when he heard Morgan’s animated singing. Slipping across the hall to her bedroom, Dave peeked inside.

Dressed in a bright pink outfit, Morgan was entertaining herself by serving tea to a rather worn woolly lamb named Baa Baa and two pristine-looking fashion dolls.

“Got room for one more?” Dave asked, hanging his suit coat and tie on the doorknob.

“Daddy!” Morgan exclaimed, running. She reached her arms out and Dave lifted her into the air. Wrapping her arms around his neck, Morgan pelted him with kisses.

“That’s quite a welcome,” Dave said, holding his daughter tight. How he loved this little girl. She was light and life and all things special.