Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Shoots and Scores (26 page)

EQUIPMENT OF THE FUTURE?

Even as he was preparing to play games again in Victoria, Blackburn was tweaking the blocker, a process he expects to continue for as long as a year. But he feels it's getting closer to a finished product, one he plans to patent just in case the idea—and his career—takes off. After all, necessity has always been the mother of invention. “If I have a lot of success with it maybe it will catch on,” Blackburn said, failing to note whether the pun was intended. “It will all hinge on how successful I am with it. Who knows, if things go really well, maybe kids will start using it instead of a regular glove.”

LAST-MINUTE UPDATE

In September 2005, Dan Blackburn retired from professional hockey. Sadly, for Dan and for hockey fans everywhere, his injuries would not allow him to compete at the NHL level. He'd been invited back to Rangers training camp on a tryout basis and arrived with his two blockers. But it was not going to work.

Blackburn explained, “A glove was never an option because of my permanent disability. I've really had no significant improvement in my shoulder for two years and I tried everything in my power. I mean, I tried playing with two blockers [but] I couldn't do it…That's why I have to retire. I just can't compete at a high enough level.”

NHL players take out insurance policies on themselves in the event of a career-ending injury. Blackburn is entitled to a financial settlement but says, “It still doesn't replace what I really wanted to do.”

Uncle John tells the story of five businessmen who have played pivotal roles in the development of their respective teams.

W
illiam Davidson:
For an 80-year-old-plus man to be the first owner of two teams that won championships in their respective sports in the same season (the NBA's Detroit Pistons and NHL's Tampa Bay Lightning) is some feat—but Bill Davidson is one unique owner. He is quiet and respectful of his employees, willing to wait months or years for his teams to solidify into winners. A generous philanthropist, Davidson made his money with a company in the Detroit area that specializes in making automobile windshield glass and other flat glass products. As owner of the Pistons since 1974, he saw the team win consecutive championships in 1989 and 1990. He took over the Lightning in 1999 and oversaw the hiring of general manager Jay Feaster and head coach John Tortorella, an unheralded hockey duo if there ever was one. But Davidson's confidence translated into a Stanley Cup in 2004, the same year his Pistons won him a third NBA title.

Tom Hicks:
This quiet but firm billionaire investment entrepreneur took control of what could have been a legal and economic nightmare—the selling of a hapless franchise that retreated from Minnesota under owner Norm Green—and managed to set a winning course. This was some accomplishment, considering Dallas had a brutal 26-42-14 record in 1995–96, Hicks' first season as owner. Key additions of head coach Ken Hitchcock and proven leaders Guy Carbonneau, Joe Nieuwendyk, Mike Keane, and Brian Skrudland improved the team's record over the next two seasons and eventually led to a tightly focused organization that won two Stanley Cups.

Mike Ilitch:
The owners of the Detroit Red Wings are very much
a husband-and-wife team: Mike is owner and Marian is owner/secretary-treasurer/advisor. When Mike was 30, in 1959, Mike and Marian opened a pizza parlor in Garden City, Michigan, named “Little Caesar's” based on Marian's nickname for Mike. The pizza parlor gradually turned into a pizza chain, and eventually into one of North America's foremost take-out enterprises. In 1968, the Ilitchs started the Little Caesar's Minor Hockey program, the lifeblood of many youth hockey leagues throughout North America. The Ilitchs bought the Detroit Red Wings in 1982 for what now seems a bargain—$8 million U.S.—and the Detroit Tigers baseball team two years later. For the first few years the Wings were terrible, but patience paid off, particularly in the form of 1983 draft pick Steve Yzerman. The Detroit Red Wings have won three Stanley Cups and nine division championships in the Ilitch Era up to the 2004 lockout. In 2003, Mike was elected to the Hockey Hall of Fame in the Builders Category.

E. Stanley Kronke:
When the NHL cancelled the 2004–05 season, thousands of season ticket holders for various teams wondered what would become of their money. Colorado Avalanche owner Stanley Kronke moved quickly to comfort his team's fans with a two-option plan that was widely regarded as fair. And refreshingly, he expressed genuine remorse for the owners' role in the lockout of NHL hockey. This attitude seems to be consistent with his Kronke Group's approach to real estate investment and development: Despite being one of North America's leading developers in shopping centers and apartment buildings, it has aimed to build a reputation based on community improvements over environmental degradation. Kronke's purchase of the Avalanche bolstered a dramatic and successful run to the Stanley Cup in 2001.

Ed Snider:
Like Mike Ilitch, Snider had a life-changing event happen to him around the age of 30. He sold his successful record company Edge Ltd. and then teamed up with two other investors to purchase the NFL's Philadelphia Eagles. Snider got involved with hockey by accident. While attending a Boston Celtics game, he noticed a crowd of Bruins fans lining up to buy the remaining 1,000 tickets for a last-place team. Soon thereafter, he learned that the NHL was planning to expand, and successfully lobbied in
1966 for a new team in Philadelphia. Under Snider, the brash-and-bash Flyers became the most hated new team in the NHL. They also were the most successful, winning consecutive Stanley Cups in 1974 and 1975. The Broad Street Bully heyday is long past, but the Flyers have remained contenders and on a daily basis the strong-willed Snider continues to take on the responsibility for team success. In 1988, he was elected as a Builder to the Hockey Hall of Fame.

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PLAYING THE PERCENTAGES

“If everyone elevates their game by 2 percent with Mats gone, that equals 40 percent.”

—Curtis Joseph, on how his Toronto Maple Leafs should respond to losing captain Mats Sundin to injury

“I know that he often gives only 60 percent of his capacity, but it's hard to punish him because at 60 percent he's better than our other defencemen at 100 percent.”

—Montreal Canadiens executive Réjean Houle,
on defenceman Vladimir Malakhov

“You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.”

—Wayne Gretzky

“Our team can't afford to have 5 percent of the guys not playing 100 percent. But when we've got 95 percent not giving 100 percent, we're in real trouble.”

—Bob Berry, head coach of the Los Angeles Kings, 1980

Vladislav Tretiak's commitment to being a high-octane, world-class athlete left easygoing NHL models like Turk “the Fabulous Fatman” Broda in the annals of history.

G
eorge Washington was the Founding Father (or one of the Founding Fathers) of America. Simon Bolivar of Venezuela had the great dream of someday linking North, Central and South Americas into one massive country with one government (which, by the way, he would rule). It didn't happen, but at the very least he managed to garner the title of Founding Father in the southern continent. But who is the Founding Father of Modern-Day Goaltending, you ask? Well, Vladislav Tretiak, of course.

BORN TO LEAD

In retrospect, more than any other goaltender of his era Tretiak seemed to have all known aspects of the position figured out. Equipment; nutrition; physical fitness (including exercises to quicken his reflexes); positioning…Tretiak had thoroughly considered and studied all of these important aspects of netminding.

Washington and Bolivar were born to lead; Tretiak was born to play goalie. Interestingly, as compared to most Russian hockey players—who learn to skate and play hockey by the ages of five or six—Tretiak came to the sport at the greybeard age of 11. But his natural talents were so immediately obvious that by the time he was 15 he was regularly practising with the Central Red Army Team based in Moscow.

A BIRD CAGE WITH BUTTERFLY WINGS
Equipment:
Tretiak was the first goaltender of international importance to have success while wearing the so-called “bird cage” goalie helmet. He was well-known for taking meticulous care of
his catching glove, blocker and his leg pads. Tretiak also popularized the plastic toe guard for goalie skates.

Nutrition and Physical Fitness:
The man ate and drank foods and liquids that were healthy for him; no excess pizza and beer for this Russian. Tretiak kept himself in prime physical condition all year long.

Positioning:
Primarily a reflex goalie, he was unique in that he could play both the butterfly and stand-up forms of netminding, or even a combination of both (like Martin Brodeur of the New Jersey Devils would do later). Especially noteworthy for a man who was 6' 2” inches tall and weighed 202 pounds, he would adopt any style of goaltending that the situation called for.

Mental Outlook:
Tretiak had considerable mental toughness and played at his best in important games. With a man like this holding up the back end, Tretiak's teammates felt they could win any game. And they usually did.

AN UNCLE JOHN LONG LIST OF ACCOMPLISHMENTS

When he was 17, Tretiak became a member of the Central Red Army Team and one year later he was the team's starting goaltender. This was about 1970. What he did in the sport for the next 14 years is almost beyond belief:

• Three Olympic gold medals in 1972, 1976 and 1984. In 1980, he was awarded a silver medal when the Soviet Union lost to the U.S. squad in Lake Placid, New York.

• Thirteen Soviet League Championships.

• Ten World Championship titles.

• Voted best goaltender in the World and European Championships in 1974, 1979, 1981 and 1983.

• Winner of the Tournament Most Valuable Player Award in the 1981 Canada Cup Series, which the Soviet Union won.

• In both Olympic Games and World Championship play, Tretiak's goals-against average was under 2.00 (1.74, Olympics; 1.92, World Championships).

Considering that he was playing against the best players in the world, these are incredible statistics.

FOUNDING FATHER IN THE GREATEST GAME

North American hockey fans first learned of Tretiak when he sparkled as the starting goaltender in the eight-game 1972 Summit Series between the Soviet Union and Team Canada. Canada won, but it was clear that Tretiak was perhaps the best player in the world. Three years later, on New Year's Eve, 1975, he played probably the greatest game of his illustrious career. Playing the Montreal Canadiens, Tretiak held Les Habs in check for a 3–3 tie—despite the fact his Red Army team was outshot 38–13. This matchup between two great teams, and two great goalies in Tretiak and Ken Dryden, is called by some hockey historians “the greatest game ever played.”

FOUNDING FATHER IN THE HALL OF FAME

Tretiak—who never played an NHL game despite being drafted by the Canadiens—retired after the 1983–84 season, but wasn't completely done with hockey. In the 1990–91 season, Tretiak became a goalie coach for the Chicago Blackhawks and tutored, among others, Dominik Hasek and Ed Belfour. Soon after, he returned to his homeland to become president of the Ice Hockey Federation of Russia. In 1989, he was the first European and Russian player to be elected to the Hockey Hall of Fame. And in a poll, Tretiak was voted the greatest Russian athlete of the 20th century.

Washington and Bolivar have been remembered by historians long after their deaths. Likewise, Uncle John assures you that the legacy of Vladislav Tretiak will continue to be passed onto bathroom readers for decades and centuries to come.

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THE RITUAL OF REDEMPTION

“If I play badly I'll pick a fight in the third, just to get into a fight. I'll break a guy's leg to win, I don't care. Afterward I say, ‘Yeah all right I played badly, but I won the fight so who gives a damn.'”

—Derek Sanderson, former Boston Bruins center

The development of women's hockey was a slow, uphill battle—a parallel to progress of equality in many areas.

T
he contrast in style in the photographs taken approximately a century apart is startling, much more than the pictures of two men's sports teams over that much time…The Ottawa Canadian Banknote women's hockey team of 1905 shows six ladies in long skirts, turtleneck sweaters and toques with tassels. One player stands out because, barely discernible in the ancient photo, she is wearing what appears to be hockey skates while the others are in vintage figure skates. No protective gear, even the primitive padding of the time, is worn by any of the women.

Compare that to the team picture of the 2005 U.S. women's team, the world champions. They're wearing modern hockey gear made from space-age materials, their equipment identical to that worn by the 2004 Stanley Cup champion Tampa Bay Lightning—except that much of it is even custom-made for female players.