Undercover (12 page)

Alex nodded once and followed the other man into the office. The three old officers sat calmly, having coffee. The oldest said in a deceivingly friendly voice, “Good morning, Alexei. You do not look well. Domestic worries?”

The others chuckled. “I trust you have reached a sensible decision?”

Alex held nothing but contempt for himself as he answered, “I accept. You leave me no choice.”

He didn’t know their agenda, but whatever ungodly coalition they worked for, the end result was the same. They had the power, and he couldn’t get away. They threw a thick envelope filled with documents in front of him. “You’re no longer needed here. You will be leaving today.”

He shook his head slowly, ignoring how it made the world spin faster.

“All the details you need for now are in there. You will receive further orders later.”

One of the others filled in, “You should get married, celebrate, go on a honeymoon.”

Alex forced himself to stop fantasizing about strangling them slowly. He could probably get at least two of them before they killed him, even in the shape he was in, and it would be a worthy cause. He took the envelope, turned around, and marched back to the car, followed by their laughter.

Once back in the car, he closed his eyes, and didn’t open them even when the vehicle moved. He waited for several minutes before he looked in the envelope, pulling out tickets, information about a newly opened account in Bank of America with funds in it, an American passport, and a social security card, all in his name. It was all he could have wished for and more, and it made him feel utterly guilty and depressed.

*****

Jenny was surprised when her phone rang and she heard her lover’s voice. “Hello, my darling, I need you to pack. We leave as soon as I get there.”

He paused, but only for a second, and she could almost see him rub his temples. “If you see something you like for me, bring it, but don’t worry about it.”

At first, her mouth refused to obey, but when she re-found her ability to speak, she said, “Okay, love. It’ll be ready when you get here.” She wanted to ask about his things and about his car, but she knew better.

Fretting over whether to leave some civilian clothes out for him or not took almost as long as actually packing. She decided against it. He sounded like they were in a hurry, and if he wanted to change, it would only take seconds to pull something out.

As relieved as she was they were leaving, it saddened her too. There was so little to bring back from his entire life. He would never come back.

By the time Alex entered the apartment, she had packed and the suitcases stood side by side at the door with her jacket thrown over them. She was ready.

Alex leaned his back against the wall and ran his hands over his face. She couldn’t hold it in, “You look terrible.”

“I bet I do. I’ve had better days. Come, we should leave.”

The suitcases looked so small. “I didn’t know what to pack for you.”

He made a dismissive gesture. “It doesn’t matter, there’s nothing here that’s important to me.”

Chapter Fourteen

It only took a few minutes until they were in a taxi, on their way back to the airport. Jenny remembered it as an endless drive from their arrival, and it seemed even longer going back. They hadn’t been in Russia very long, but it seemed like forever.

Alex was even paler now than in the apartment, and he had dark rings around his eyes. A voice in her head insisted he’d been trying to kill himself, but she couldn’t figure out why.

Once they reached the terminal, they walked side by side in silence. There was a queue to check in luggage, and Jenny said, “Why don’t you go sit down and I’ll deal with this.”

Alex looked like he wanted to shake his head, but thought better of it. “No.”

She teased him, “You’re just like a little kid wanting his way. Stubborn.”

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Yes.”

Whoever planned their trip did a good job with getting them on their way. They waited at a gate for less than fifteen minutes, and then his name echoed in the PA-system. Jenny filled with bad feelings when they approached the counter. Maybe something happened and someone wanted to keep them where they were.

It turned out to be the opposite. Through the window she could see people still working on cleaning out the plane from the previous flight, but they were still allowed aboard. Alex’s hand shook when he held the tickets out. She left him alone on the plane, and he slept all the way to Moscow.

Even during the circumstances, Jenny thought the name of the Moscow airport sounded funny.
Domodedovo
. It sounded a little like donut… The place was busy, filled with stores and people. She must have been too tired to appreciate it when going in the other direction. Now, it came across as a sanctuary of sanity.

All sorts of people streamed by, and her eyes fell on a woman in a large fur coat that would have caused an outrage with animal-rights organizations in America. She wore too much jewelry and too much make-up. Even though there might be a McDonalds tucked away there somewhere, they were still very much on foreign soil. Was Moscow in Europe or in Asia? She didn’t remember enough geography to say for sure, and she wasn’t curious enough to take action to find out.

They had a little time to spare between planes, and Alex squeezed her shoulder and nodded towards a coffee shop. “I want you to go there and wait for me. I’ll be there in ten minutes. Get us some coffee or something.”

Ten minutes ticked by and turned into twenty. It didn’t seem like him to abandon her. Maybe something happened to him. Then, she spotted her tall lover moving through her crowd. He was dressed in new civilian clothes, had splashed some water on his face, and ruffled his hair. Overall, he didn’t qualify for a zombie-move any longer.

He reached out for the coffee she’d bought for him, and she grimaced, “It’s probably cold, I’ll get you a new one.”

“It’ll be fine.”

She poked his arm. “How are you?”

She meant on more levels than just the physical. There were clearly things going on she didn’t know about, seemingly dramatic, and his life had turned completely upside down. He made a dismissive gesture. “I feel like I deserve. Terrible.”

He stared into nothingness for a few minutes, and appeared to reach a decision. “Would you be okay here for a few more minutes? There’s something I want to do.”

Jenny shrugged and pretended she didn’t object to sitting alone in a gigantic Russian airport. “Of course.”

He got up, but paused long enough to kiss her on the cheek before disappearing into the crowd. Jenny sighed and prepared for another long wait, but Alex returned after just a few minutes, placing a little box on the table right in front of her. “Here you go.” He smiled and brushed a lock of her hair away. “You thought I was going on some mysterious Russian male errand, like a search for cigars or more vodka.”

It was exactly what she had been thinking. The little box made her feel warm inside. He had to be utterly miserable, and still went to get her a surprise. “I think you love me.”

He looked amused, “Of course I do, silly girl. Open it.”

She did, and knew she would save the box no matter what might be inside. It was pretty, and she got it from him. Then her eyes turned wide and round. It contained a necklace that looked like it could buy her a new car. She held it over her hand.

“Diamonds and gold should surround a beautiful woman.”

She shook her head, overwhelmed. “Thank you. It’s so beautiful.”

He put the necklace on her, fumbling just a little with the lock, and his words made her beam even more. “I wanted to buy you a ring, but I realize it will mean more if I’m sober.”

*****

They flew Scandinavian Airlines to Stockholm, and whoever booked the flights was considerate enough to put them in first class. The plane and crew still seemed foreign, but much less so than everything else she’d encountered this last week.

She ordered a ginger ale, and the can had writing in English. It made her want to cry. It was pathetic, but she hadn’t been this homesick in her life. Even the airplane food looked friendly; everything was written with letters she recognized.

Alex poked around in his meal, and she suspected the only reason he touched it at all was to make her happy. Would the plane be a safe place to talk? There were so many things she wanted to ask him, and surely, no one could bug a plane?

As usual, Alex seemed to read her mind. He shook his head ever so little and mumbled, “No.” After leaning over to press a kiss on her cheek, he tilted his seat back and fell asleep within seconds, holding her hand.

*****

On the way to Moscow, the Arlanda airport seemed extremely foreign. People spoke a peculiar language that sounded a little like German, but not quite. Once they realized they were talking to an American they spoke English just fine and seemed extremely friendly, but it wasn’t home. The signs looked a little weird, with strange dots over some letters, but most of them were translated into English as well.

Now, after all of her new experiences, the airport seemed like a haven of normalcy. It was filled with smiling and friendly western people, and even the ones in a hurry were polite. When she looked at the signs this time they didn’t seem alien at all. The writing was big and friendly, and besides her own language, she recognized French and German, and she assumed the fourth must be Swedish. She allowed herself to relax.

Alex held a practical approach to life. “We have over two hours until our next flight. Are you hungry?”

The food on the plane was more symbolic than anything, and she couldn’t remember the last time they had a real meal. It had to be days earlier.

Strolling around the terminal, looking for somewhere to eat, he said, “This is a nice country. It’s not America and it’s not Russia, it’s somewhere in between. Maybe, sometime, we can go here for vacation, yes?”

She wasn’t in the mood to think about going anywhere but home, but she nodded anyway, just to make him happy. “You look much better.”

He seemed to find that funny. “I feel better. Did I tell you I hate vodka?”

The comment made her laugh; it sure hadn’t seemed that way the night before. Or whatever time and day it was. “Is this breakfast, lunch, or dinner?”

Alex smiled and shook his head, “I do not know. What day is it here? I have no idea. Let us sort it out when we get home.”

Hearing him call it ‘home’ brought a wide smile to her face.

They passed a school band of some sort, playing just a little out of tune. Jenny groaned, wondering whatever might possess authorities to let children play at an airport. And, wouldn’t this wreak havoc with airport security? Sure, they weren’t in America, but look at all that
metal
in the instruments…

The kids were loud and she wanted to hold her ears and hurry in the other direction, but Alex pulled her towards them, towards a chair right in front of them, where the noise was unbearable. To her horror, he flashed a smile and said, “Let us watch this.”

She rolled her eyes but sat on his lap anyway when he urged her to. The band ended one song and Alex applauded. She went along and clapped her hands too. Seeing the children smile almost made it worth the effort. She wanted to ask, “Are you still drunk?” but didn’t get around to it. He mumbled in her ear, “We can talk here. I do not want anyone to know that I have told you, at least not yet, but you deserve to know.”

She blinked a couple of times, and whispered back, pretending to kiss him, “Tell me what? What happened?”

*****

Alex ran a hand over Jenny’s back. Was he about to make another major mistake? Telling her might not be the right thing to do. Maybe he just wanted to unload his own conscience. “They gave me a choice. I could go back with you and become a… what do you say… An infiltrator. I am now a spy, possibly a terrorist.”

The last word made him grimace. He had been many things in his life, but so far a terrorist hadn’t been one of them. “They might want me to find information, maybe they will want me to build a bomb. Maybe I will have to deliver something or kill someone. Maybe there will be nothing at all.”

Jenny shuddered, and he ran his hands over her arms in a futile effort to comfort her. He didn’t want to tell her anything more, but she needed to understand why she must be careful. “The other alternative was to stay where I was, and see you sent to a hard labor camp in Siberia. I could not do that.”

She clung to him, and knowing he frightened her multiplied the grating feeling of guilt. Jenny surprised him through trailing her lips over his cheek. “Thank you.”

It made no sense at all. Putting her life in jeopardy was hardly worthy of thanks. “For what?”

“I… You gave up everything for me. You’re risking your life for me.”

He hadn’t thought about it like that. Sacrificing her to be able to resume his old and gray life wasn’t an option. He sighed. “This can be very dangerous, and if I fail, you may get part of the blame. You will have to trust me, and if I ever tell you to run, or to get down, you must do exactly as I say. I know this is not your way, you make your own decisions, but this is a matter of your life. Do you understand?”

She was reluctant to obey anyone but herself, he knew this, and he was relieved when she nodded. A thought crossed his mind, and he smiled in spite of everything. “I would tell you I’m sorry for all this, but I don’t want you to hit me again. Poor defenseless Russian drunk…”

“I didn’t think you’d remember that.”

Fair enough. A lot of the previous night and morning
was
a blur to him.

Chapter Fifteen

When the wheels finally touched American soil, Jenny was both relieved and nervous. She was so happy to be home she could cry, at the same time as she fretted over his papers. They looked good but could hardly be real. Alex didn’t seem worried at all; he was the epitome of calm as they stood in the long line to the passport checkpoint.