Wildflower (Colors #4) (26 page)

We were wrong.

We weren’t happy. There were no talks of the future anymore. No mention of NYU or University of Ohio. There was no planning on what we were going to do or where we were going to go once the baby was born. It was like we were living in a holding pattern.

The future remained a topic we shied away from. All the while, Noah tried to dull the pain of the loss of his bright future by partying. He was hardly ever home. If he wasn’t at the gym or working his part time job at the lumber yard, he was with his friends doing God-knows-what. Being a typical eighteen year old boy with no responsibilities.

Meanwhile, I was stuck at home—well, Noah’s home, actually. It had never come to feel like
mine
. I felt like I wasn’t allowed to go out because I was pregnant. It was for that very same reason that I’d lost the majority of my friends. Chloe was really the only one who stuck by me once the truth came out. I was no longer fun. I wasn’t cool. I was the knocked-up high school student that no one wanted to be around for fear that my pregnancy would somehow magically rub off.

I had Gram, I had Chloe, I had Ethan—even though we weren’t telling him about the baby just yet—and I had Noah, or at least I did… once.

As I looked at the picture I couldn’t stop the tears that leaked out and fell down my cheeks. That picture was the perfect depiction of my and Noah’s
after.

After
our happiness ended.

After
everything good in my life faded away.

After
our dreams had gone up in smoke.

God, I hated
after
. And with the more time that passed, where I sat at home, alone, I began to hate Noah.

He wasn’t the only one feeling resentment. Yet, I was the only one whose life seemed to be affected by the most recent changes. He was still going out, hanging with his friends, acting the part of Pembrooke’s golden boy destined for greatness. I was so angry at him for how he had seemingly abandoned me that I took the passive-aggressive route and refused to take his last name after our so called wedding. It was pathetic, to say the least, but it was one of the only ways I knew to stick it to him and his parents.

Placing the picture face down on the nightstand, I clicked off the lamp and slid further under the covers, trying to shove down my anger and sadness long enough for sleep to pull me under.

I woke with a sharp, blinding pain slicing through my abdomen.

Fumbling around, I managed to find the switch for the lamp and turned it on. It was well after two in the morning and I was still alone in my and Noah’s bed. Another wave of pain hit, and I did my best to breathe through the cramping as I threw off the covers and swung my legs over the side of the bed.

Climbing to my feet, I snatched my phone off the bedside table and hit Noah’s number. Three rings then straight to voicemail. I did this again and again, only to have the same results.

“Pick up, Noah,” I choked past a sob. “Please pick up.”

“You’ve reached Noah. I can’t take your call, but—”

“Shit,” I hissed as I flipped the switch in the bathroom, illuminating the entire space is harsh, white light. Standing in front of the mirror, I barely gave my pale, clammy complexion any thought as I lifted my t-shirt up and pulled at the waistband of my shorts and panties. I knew what I was about to find.

With a broken sob, I held the phone up once more, the screen blurry from my tears. I didn’t bother with Noah again. He’d stopped being my rock, the shoulder I could lean on months ago. Standing in a cold bathroom with the phone to my ear only solidified that.

“Nine-one-one. What’s your emergency?”

“Yes. This is… this is Harlow P-prewitt. I think I’m h-having a m-miscarriage. Can you please send an ambulance?”

“Shit!” I gasped, my dream having pulled me from a restless sleep.

“It was just a dream, it was just a dream,” I told myself as I breathed deeply. Once I got my bearings I realized it was already morning. The sun was shining through the bedroom windows, filling it with a warm, peaceful glow that didn’t go with my racing heart.

There was a light knock on the bedroom door. “Harlow?” Navie called. “You awake?”

“Yeah,” I answered, dropping my hand on top of my still flat belly, wondering how long it would take for it to pop out. Strangely enough, after my bout of sanity the night before, I was actually looking forward to that happening. “Be right out.”

“Okay,” she hesitated. “Uh… you might want to hurry.” There was a long pause that she followed up with, “Noah’s here.”

In the light of a new day, it wasn’t lost on me that I’d been a complete asshole the night before. Chloe was right, it wasn’t his fault. I just needed some time to marinate on everything that was happening. Those pregnancy tests, on top of everything that was going on with Ethan and my constant second-guessing when it came to my romantic life, were the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Now that I was thinking rationally once again, I felt like a douche for blowing him off.

As soon as my feet hit the soft rug that lay across the wooden floors in the bedroom, my stomach roiled. Well, at least I knew why I’d been feeling like shit for a while. Morning sickness was a bitch.

I couldn’t bring myself to look in the mirror and get a glimpse of the disaster that was my dirty, tangled bed head as I opened the door and headed down the stairs.

Noah stood at the foot, just a few feet inside the front door, looking far too handsome for someone with so much anger rolling off of him. Navie was at his side, smiling way too happily so early in the morning.

“Hey,” I said, making my arrival known. I had barely placed my foot on the bottom step when he spoke.

“Why the fuck are you blowing me off?”

Well, looks like it was now or never
.

I held my hands up in a placating gesture. “Okay, just calm down—”

“Fuck that,” he snapped. “Why the fuck have you been blowing me off. I want an answer, Harlow, and it better be really good, or so help me God, I’m gonna tan your ass.”

“Noah!” I shouted just as Navie began giggling like an idiot. Heat flooded my blood—and not just from embarrassment. “You’re going to wake Ethan up!”

“No worries,” she chirped jovially. “He left earlier. Said something about ranch chores? I’ve been up for a few hours,” she turned and explained to Noah. “Still on New York time.”

“Okay, then. How about you give me and Noah some privacy so we can discuss
things
?” I mumbled with big eyes, hoping she got the hint. Luckily, she got it.
Un
luckily, she didn’t care.

“Oh, no. Nuh-uh. No way am I missing this.”

“Navie,” I warned.

“I feel like I’m in an episode of
Dynasty
or something. That was set in the mountains, right? This could totally be
Dynasty
.”

“I’m officially ending our friendship.”

“Bitch,
please
,” she scoffed.

“Seriously.”

“Harlow!” Noah barked, clearly done with my and Navie’s little exchange.

“Fine!” I huffed as I threw my hands in the air. “I’m pregnant!”

The room suddenly became so silent you could hear crickets.

“What?” Noah asked quietly after several agonizing seconds.

“I’m pregnant,” I answered cautiously.

“Pregnant,” he breathed, visibly shocked.

“Yep.”

“You.”

“Yep.”

“You’re pregnant,” he repeated, and I felt myself growing more agitated with each passing second.

Propping my hands on my hips, I narrowed my eyes at him, all attitude as I said, “Think we’ve established that, Noah. I’m pregnant. Knocked up. Bun in the oven. With child. Not sure there are any other ways to phrase that.”

“Preggers,” Navie announced, not so helpfully.

“Thank you,” I deadpanned. “I stand corrected.”

“Manufacturing a human. In the family way. In the maternal condition. Up the duff,” she continued.

“Jeez, Nav! We get it, okay?”

“Just trying to be helpful,” she shrugged nonchalantly.

“Well, you’re not.”

“You’re pregnant,” Noah said…
again
. “But… how? I thought you said you had one of those IOU things.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose on a sigh. “It’s an IUD,” I answered. “And apparently I didn’t pay very good attention when the doctor went over the shelf life on the damn thing. It expired about a year ago.”

“That’s… I can’t… I’m just… This is fuckin’
amazing
!” He shouted all of a sudden, sweeping me into his arms in a bear hug before spinning me around. “You’re pregnant! We’re having a baby!”

Once I was back on my feet, Noah cupped my cheeks in his large hands. “You’re happy?” I asked in bewilderment. Considering our past, I had been gearing up for this to go badly. I never expected him to be so excited about it.

“Hell yeah, I’m happy! Are you kidding me? You’re carrying my baby, wildflower. I’m fuckin’ ecstatic!”

“Really?”

His lips came down on mine in a gentle kiss that melted some of the tension from my shoulders.

“Really, baby,” he whispered before pulling back with a beaming smile on his face. “You know what this means, right?”

“Uh… that I’m going to get fat?” I hedged.

“We have to get married.”

The sound of squealing breaks filled my head as I stared up at him in utter shock. It took what felt like an eternity for my brain to re-boot.

“Are you fucking
crazy
?!” I shouted at the top of my lungs.

Then the morning sickness went into full effect.