Worth It (27 page)

“I’ll try.” He dips his head down to give me a quick kiss before he walks over to the restroom.

I watch him round the corner, and I can’t help but stare after him. I sigh. I didn’t think being with someone could ever be like this.

The doorbell chimes, and I mentally thank my lucky stars that I didn’t drag Jed out back. If we had chosen to finish what we started, having a customer walk in right now would have been bad. I glance over to the door, and all the blood drains from my face. It’s Sam.

What the fuck?

I purse my lips and cross my arms over my chest. “Can you not take a hint, Sam?”

He walks over to me with determination, and he stops close to me, too close for my liking.

“We need to talk. I need you to hear me out.”

I’m shocked and stunned silent when he gets down on his knees in front of me.

“Please, Anna, I need you to forgive me.
Please
. You were the best thing that ever happened to me, and I need you. I love you, Anna, and we are meant to be together. I want to get married and have babies with you. Please don’t throw us away. Give me another shot. Please.”

I’m completely speechless, utterly stunned, by what is happening right now. Yes, he’s laid it on thick before but never like this. I don’t know what to say. I’m not going back to him. There’s no fucking way, especially since I have Jed, but this is totally unlike Sam. He’s always acted like he’s above me. He’s always been like that, so to see him on his knees in front of me, begging, has me shocked. I’m frozen, and it feels a little like being outside of myself.

He stands, and before I can react, he grabs the back of my head and crashes his mouth to mine.

I come out of the restroom and turn the corner to see Anna lip-locked with some blond fucker. Red—I see red. Rage boils inside me, and I clench my fists.

“What the fuck!” I roar.

Blond fucker snaps his head around without taking his arms off of her. “Who are you?” he asks with narrowed eyes.

Glancing at Anna, I notice her struggling.

“He’s my boyfriend, Sam. Get off me.”

My body relaxes when I realize he must have pounced on her, but my relief doesn’t last.

Sam—he’s that motherfucker.

I stomp over and pull Anna to me. Sam looks frozen with shock and hurt.

“You better keep your hands off her, you fucking shithead.” My voice is menacingly calm.

He shakes his head, and then he narrows his eyes and smiles tightly. “Are you the latest she’s spreading her skank legs for?” He peers over me to Anna. “How many other cocks are you sucking? If I had known you were fucking everything that moved, I wouldn’t have bothered.” He shakes his head again. “You know what? I’m done. That lousy pussy is not worth this shit. You’re not worth it, Anna.”

Before I can even think, my fist rears back and comes crashing down on his jaw. “Shut your fucking mouth, you stupid fucking asshole.”

His head snaps back, and he stumbles backward a few steps before righting himself. He stares hard at me as he wipes the blood from his lip with the back of his hand. He gives one hard laugh before shaking his head. “I can’t believe you punched me, asshole. She’s not worth fighting over,” he sneers. “Advice—tap it and move on. She’s a weak slut who’s not worth the air she breathes. She’s definitely not worth getting involved with. She’s clingy, needy, and whiny, and she can’t even suck dick properly. Trust me, she’s not worth the headache.”

“Are you fucking shitting me?” Anna screams from behind me. She stalks over to him and slaps him hard, making his face jerk.

Sam’s jaw drops, and his eyes grow wide.

She jabs her finger into his chest. “You are such a fucking asshole. After everything you put me through, you have the fucking nerve to practically stalk me. Then, you come to my work and say that shit?” She laughs incredulously. “I thought I had fucking issues. You’re like Jekyll and Hyde! Not three minutes ago, you were saying I was the best thing that happened to you, and we were meant to be together. You were on your
knees
,
begging me to have your fucking
babies
. And now, this? Seriously? Fuck. You.” She jabs her finger into him again. “You know what I think? I think you’re a sick motherfucker who enjoyed torturing me. You enjoyed controlling me. You
enjoyed
making me feel worthless. Now that you’ve lost me, you’ve realized you’d never find someone who’d put up with the shit I put up with.”

She’s shaking with anger, but I’m so fucking proud of her right now for sticking up for herself against this dick.

Her voice lowers as she continues, “You know what I think, Sam? I think you’re a manipulative prick who isn’t worth the dirt on my shoes. I’m a better person than you will ever be. You can leave now, Sam, and don’t bother calling or coming back.”

He recovers from his surprise quickly. He snorts and says, “Whatever, bitch. You’re not better than me.”

He leans down to get in her face, and my feet move towards them, my jaw working and my fists clenching.

“Like I said, you are worthless.”

Before the last syllable escapes his lips, I reach him and grab him by the shirt. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Does it make you feel like a big man, saying that shit to her, putting down a woman like that?” I push him away. “Leave—before I end up dismantling your face.”

He rights himself, squares his shoulders, and sizes me up. He must realize that he would abso-fucking-lutely get his face dismantled. He starts for the door as he says, “Whatever, you fucking loser. It’s your fucking dick. When it shrivels up and falls off, don’t say you weren’t warned.” He stops and turns back, his eyes focused on Anna, and his lips curl up evilly. “Just so you know, I cheated on you almost the entire time we were together,” he announces before walking out the door.

I want to run after him and smash his face in. I feel like my jaw might shatter. I’ve never seen anyone treat a woman like that. Yeah, I’ve known some who have slept around, not staying tied to one girl, but to say those things to someone is just fucking wrong. The fury coursing through me is so hard to contain that my body is solid as stone. I release a breath, willing myself to calm the fuck down.
He’s not worth the rag I’d use to wipe off his blood.

I turn to Anna and see her taking calming breaths. “You okay, baby?”

She warily looks over at me. “I’m sorry you had to see that, Jed.” She shakes her head and smiles weakly at me. “He’s such a fucking asshole. He knows how much the cheating thing hurts me, and he just threw it out there to be vindictive.”

“Yeah, cheating is never okay,” I affirm, trying to soothe her. “I’m sorry, baby.”

She shakes her head, draws in a deep breath, and looks up at me. “I’ve had two boyfriends, and they
both
cheated.” She looks like she’s struggling for words. “It’s just so fucking frustrating that I’m not good enough to stay faithful to.” She shifts her eyes on the ceiling and then brings them back to me. “I think that was good for me, believe it or not, but I’m having a hard time processing it right now.” She smiles weakly. “You ready to bolt yet?”

I want to roll my eyes, but I don’t. “Of course not, Anna. He’s an asshole, but I don’t hold that against you. You are smart, funny, and wonderful.” I place a soft kiss on her lips. “And mine, right?”

She smiles up at me, but her mind is clearly elsewhere. “Right.” She kisses me back just as softly. “Listen, I should probably get back to work, but I’ll come over after.”

When I look into her eyes, I can tell she’s stressed again, and I want to help her with it. “I want you to talk about what’s bothering you before you get back to work.”

She shakes her head slightly. “It’s nothing, Jed—really. I think I’m just still a little shaken up from Sam. The adrenaline is fading. I’m fine, but I should get back to work.”

It’s more than that, and I know it. I want to shake her and yell,
Just tell me how to help you!
I hate that she’s pushing me away. I just want to crawl inside her and fix whatever it is that has been broken, so she can see the beautiful, wonderful, sexy, and awesome woman in front of me. I don’t want to push her. Between last night and this morning, I’m sure she’s having a hard time processing. I have to earn her trust, so she’ll open up to me. I can do that. I’ll be patient. I don’t want to, but for her, I’ll do it.

I sigh in acceptance. “Okay, baby, I’ll see you in a couple of hours.” I lean down and give her a quick kiss. “See you about eight fifteen?”

“Yep. Bye, Jed.”

“Bye, beautiful.” I smile at her and give her one last peck before I head out the door.

After I leave Anna, I head over to my parents’ house. I need some advice, and my dad is exactly the person I need to talk to. My dad is the shit. We didn’t have much money growing up, and my dad worked two jobs to provide for us. When he wasn’t working, he was with us. He taught me how to play baseball, how to play football, and how to be a man. He never went out to the bars or spent his days golfing with buddies. When he was off work and wasn’t with us, he was taking Mom on dates.

I’m not saying I want kids tomorrow or even next year, but I want do want them. I want a family. I want to teach my son how to throw a baseball or teach my daughter how to ride a bike. I want to kiss my wife when I get home from work.

I’m aware I sound like I have a vagina, but it is what it is.

I’m not desperate. I went on a couple of dates in between Danielle and Anna, and I knew pretty early on that those girls weren’t for me. They were pretentious or selfish or annoying. I think the best one was this girl who claimed to be a hard worker because she worked doubles twice a week. Come to find out, her single shifts were four hours, so her doubles were a normal person’s workday.

Work ethic is one of the things I admire about Anna. She works hard, goes to school, and still makes time for her friends—and now, me. Sure, she’s a little broken, but that’s fixable if she’d let someone help. As frustrating as that can be, it’s still almost attractive in a way. She’s not meek but vulnerable. Anna is strong in a way that draws me to her. I like the idea of helping her, of being her protector. I want to be the man of the house, the defender and the provider. I’m not saying she needs to stay at home, barefoot and pregnant, popping out babies, but I like the idea of being her rock, someone who she can depend on.

Fucking hell.
My throat tightens.
What the shit is this woman doing to me?
One day, I’m a raging asshole, and the next, I need a box of tampons.

I really need to talk to my dad.

I walk into my childhood home and call out, “Mom? Dad?”

“In here!” my dad says from the living room.

I make my way in, and with a sigh, I plop myself on the couch next to my dad while he’s watching college football.
Nice
.

“Hey, Dad. What’s up? Where’s Mom?”

“She ran to the grocery store. She’ll be back in an hour or so,” he says, not taking his eyes away from the screen. “Come on! That guy was definitely out of bounds!”

“I don’t think he was, Dad. I think you’re blind in your love for Boston College,” I say, laughing.