Wrestling With Love (6 page)

Derek sat up and slid an arm around Scott’s shoulder. “I know. It’s different and it’s strange, but do you think, maybe while we’re here, you could see what it’s like to not pretend? Could we see what it feels like not to hide what we are to one another? I mean, Beck says Josh and Pierre have been together for over ten years. They’re terrific role models for us. And all of those guys out there holding hands. I want to be able to do that with you.”

Scott turned to Derek, an apprehensive expression on his face. Derek sensed he was gearing up to provide an argument, but when he spoke, the words came as a complete surprise. “I don’t know how you put up with me. You’re so brave and open and I hold you back. I—“

Placing his hand over Scott’s mouth, Derek took a moment to push the lump that was forming in his throat back down. Once he had regained his composure, he began speaking, a hint of strain detectable in his voice. “Don’t. We’ve been down that road before and we’re not going there again; especially not today. You are my everything and I’m lucky to have you in my life for more reasons than I have time to explain right now.”

Lifting his hand to remove Derek’s, Scott kissed his palm, then leaned in to rest his head on Derek’s shoulder. “I know you feel that way. I just feel bad that I got all tense 29

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like that when you put your hand on my leg. I don’t want to disappoint you, Derek. I love you.”

“And I love you. Just because I’m ready for all of this and you aren’t, doesn’t mean you aren’t a great boyfriend or that there’s a problem between us. I’m sorry I brought anything up. Let’s just enjoy the weekend.”

”Do you know what I love most about you, Derek? You are so genuinely yourself and you speak to me with such understanding. I’ll try to get into the spirit of living openly as a couple while we’re here, but don’t expect miracles from me. It’s not like I can just shut off my discomfort overnight. But I’ll try, I promise.”

Derek shifted so he sat in Scott’s lap, hugging him around the waist and resting his head against Scott’s shoulder. Scott chuckled and wrapped his arms around Derek.

“You’re a little snuggle monkey. Come on. Let’s go join Josh in the other room. Josh was sitting by the window, working on a New York Times crossword puzzle. When the boys entered, he placed the paper down. “I hope the room will be okay for the two of you. It’s small, I know, but we tried to make it as comfortable as possible.”

Scott sat down next to him. “It’s fantastic. We just unpacked. Thank you so much for letting us stay here. Now that I’ve had a chance to stretch, I feel much more awake.”

The warmth that filled Derek’s chest caused his breathing to come faster. Scott’s charms worked wonders on him, but seeing him direct them toward other people always filled him with a mixture of pride and arousal.

“I’m glad.” Josh gestured for Derek to join them at the table. “I just got off the phone with Pierre. He’ll be meeting us at the steak house. Would the two of you like a glass of champagne to celebrate your visit to the city?”

“Champagne. Yeah, definitely.” Derek turned to face Scott when he started laughing. “What?”

“You. I’ve never seen you become so excited to drink. Usually you only drink sports drinks or water.” He slid his chair closer to Derek and tentatively placed an arm around his shoulder. Heat like hot flames licked at the skin on the back of his neck. Derek couldn’t decide whether the sensation was pleasurable or uncomfortable, but he didn’t have a chance before he felt himself being pulled closer to Scott. Soft, plump lips met his in a brief kiss. He inhaled sharply, the heat at the back of his neck spreading like warm liquid through his veins. When Scott pulled out of the kiss, Derek’s eyes locked with his and they stared at each other in silence for a few seconds which seemed to stretch into years.

As thrilled as Derek was, the shock of Scott’s actions planted a small doubt in his mind as well. Did he just do that because I asked him to or because he wanted to? Once again, Derek didn’t have a chance to contemplate his thoughts as his attention was drawn to Josh who sighed. Looking up to face him, Josh had clasped his hands over his heart in a dramatic display of affection. “To be young and in love. You boys remind me of what it was like when I was your age. Let’s have a glass of champagne. I 30

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don’t make a habit of providing alcohol to underage people, but you’re practically family and you aren’t driving anywhere, so a glass won’t hurt.”

One glass turned into two and by the time they had to leave for the restaurant, the three of them finished the bottle and Derek was feeling buzzed. They walked east down Christopher Street towards Fifth Avenue and headed north to Twelfth Street. The restaurant where they were meeting Pierre was called The Striphouse, which was known for its wide variety of steaks. As they walked, Josh pointed out the many stores and buildings, describing how they had changed over the years.

When they arrived, Pierre was waiting for them. He was much smaller than Josh and had a petite frame. About Derek’s height, he must have been at least ten or fifteen pounds lighter. His skin was fair and he was dressed in black slacks and a white button down shirt which was probably two sizes too small for him. The shirt was unbuttoned to the middle of his chest and he wore a form fitting black tank underneath. He was attractive, but not at all Derek’s type. Beaming, he hugged Josh and gave him a kiss, then turned to face them. “You must be Derek and Scott. Welcome to the Big Apple.”

Derek was surprised Pierre didn’t have a French accent and was quickly embarrassed by his assumption.

Once seated, they ordered and the waiter brought bread and water to the table. Josh and Pierre ordered glasses of red wine. Scott had relaxed after the couple of glasses of champagne he drank back at Josh’s apartment and was leaning back in his chair with his arm draped across the back of Derek’s chair. Again, Derek found himself filled with a mixture of pleasure and surprise at how easy it seemed for Scott to slip into the kind of behavior he had desired for so long. As was typically the case when the two of them were out with other people, Scott handled the socializing, allowing Derek to sit back and observe. As much as he had learned to open up with Scott, he was still most comfortable when blending into the background and watching how others interacted. It had been how he had managed to keep his identity hidden all through high school and remained his comfort zone when in new situations.

“So, Beck says you two have been together for over ten years. That’s amazing.”

Scott was smiling, his dimples dotting his cheeks, and both Josh and Pierre were staring directly at him as he asked the question.

Pierre smiled. “Yes, over ten years, and I haven’t run away screaming yet.” Josh was affectionately running his fingers along the back of Pierre’s neck. Pierre glanced at him and they exchanged a romantic look. “I was working at a thrift shop in the East Village,” Pierre went on, “lamenting the lack of opportunities to get involved at some of the bigger name stores to the other person working with me, when all of a sudden, in walks this beautiful man looking for vintage shirts. Of course, I went right over and asked if I could help him. He was looking for a long sleeve Retro Monkey shirt. I found it delightful that such a handsome and well-built man would want to buy such an item.”

A blush came to Pierre’s cheeks at his own reference to his lover’s build. “I brought several over and assisted him in picking out just the right one to compliment his 31

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physique and skin tone. He ended up buying a lime green shirt with the Retro Monkey head emblazoned across his chest. The green of the shirt combined with the brown tones of the money brought out the hues in his eyes. The shirt also fit him snugly, accentuating his muscles in alluring ways. I loved how the monkey’s cute little ears stretched and molded to his chest.”

Josh picked up the story. “I was utterly charmed that this young, handsome man was so attentive, so I asked him right there when he got off work and if I could take him out for drinks. He agreed, of course, and we met up at the Boiler Room. I wore my new shirt and we took things from there. It was love right from the beginning.” He leaned over to give him a sweet kiss on his cheek, then continued.

“Pierre has excellent taste in clothes and after a while, he took a position as a personal shopper at Barney’s, but the stress and the cattiness of the work got to him. He had a ton of regular customers who would only work with him and we had just bought the place on Christopher Street, so he was afraid to tell me how unhappy he was or that he wanted to quit. ”

Pierre continued. “I was terribly afraid if I told Josh I wanted to leave Barney’s to work in a store with quality clothing but without all of the pressure and stress, he would think I was unmotivated. Also, we were a relatively new couple and I didn’t want him to think I was taking his salary for granted. So I suffered through another year unhappy in my job, becoming more bitter and nasty by the day. Pierre shook his head. “The fights we had back then. Let’s just say it’s a wonder Josh kept me around. When he finally confronted me, asking me what bug had crawled up my ass, I told him the truth. The bastard, bless his beautiful soul, actually laughed at me. He told me he didn’t care how much money I made and if being this miserable was a result of the work I was doing he would prefer I didn’t work at all. Of course, I love working, so that was out of the question, but the next day I quit Barney’s and have been working for various clothing stores ever since.”

Josh turned an affectionate gaze at Pierre. “You see, boys, it’s only through communication that a relationship can survive. You’ll have your ups and downs, but if you love each other and are willing to talk honestly, things can and will work out.”

Derek was amazed at how freely and openly the two of them were talking. They had only just met, and here they were sharing the story of how they met and how they worked through a rough patch in their relationship. I wonder if, in ten or fifteen years, Scott and I will be like them?

When dinner was over and the waiter brought the check to the table, Derek tried to pay for some of the bill, but Josh dismissed his efforts, grabbing the bill and slapping down his credit card without even looking. Replacing his money, he simply thanked Josh and, once the bill was paid, followed him as they headed back to the apartment.

“Before I forget,” Josh said, “here’s a spare key to the place. You two can stay out as long as you like, but program my number into your cells in case you need me for anything. Now, go and change into what you’ll be wearing so Pierre can determine whether you’re appropriately dressed. It is his area of expertise.” They obediently went 32

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to the guest room and got changed. Scott threw on his Tasmanian Devil shirt and his combat boots. Derek put on a white Polo shirt and his pair of black All-Star Converse sneakers. Once they were dressed, they headed back to the living room to be inspected. Pierre walked over to Scott first. “Jeans are always good. The shirt is cute. It definitely compliments your body. Love the boots. What are you planning on wearing after the concert?” Scott took off his shirt to show off the tank top Derek had picked out for him before they left. Pierre nodded approvingly. “Very nice. And with a high school logo as well. The boys won’t be able to keep their eyes off of you.”

Josh walked over and handed Scott a glass of champagne. “Here, you probably need this after Pierre’s scrutiny.” Looking like he had just been inspected on a conveyor belt, Scott accepted the drink gratefully.

Next, Pierre shifted his attention to Derek. “Oh my, the jeans are perfect, but I imagine anything would look good on you with that hot little bubble butt.”

Scott took a sip of his champagne and walked over to Derek. “I’ve told him he has the hottest ass I’ve ever seen a million times, but he refuses to believe me.”

Derek was sure his face had turned crimson by this point, but he was thrilled Scott had just offered him a compliment on his physique in front of two men. Pierre nodded. “Yes. Very nice. And I love the All-Stars,” Pierre walked slowly around Derek until he had completed a full circle, “but the shirt has to go.” Grabbing Derek by the hand, he whisked him toward the bedroom. “We’ll be back in a moment,”

he called over his shoulder.

Once in his bedroom, Pierre rummaged through one of the two closets and started raking through his shirts. Finally selecting a black short-sleeved collared shirt, he held it up to Derek’s body. “Perfect,” he said. “Take that rag off and try this on.”

Derek removed his t-shirt and slid his arms into the sleeves of the black jersey. As he began buttoning, it became immediately clear that the shirt was far too small for him.

“Uh, I can only button the first four buttons.”

Pierre led him to the body length mirror along the wall next to the closet and stood behind him, adjusting his shirt so it was centered over his chest. The bottom hung just below the waist of his pants and it opened in a wide v-shape at his chest, revealing a portion of both his pectoral muscles and highlighting the crease between them where the muscles joined his sternum. Stepping back, Pierre asked Derek to turn around for him. “Perfect. You look incredibly hot. Let’s go show the guys.”

When Derek walked back into the living room, Josh whistled and Scott’s mouth dropped open and he crossed the room until he was standing directly in front of him.