8 Mile & Rion (26 page)

This was Loyal, the killer.

“Lying whore,” he growls advancing on Tony. Pushing him out of the way, I raise my gun which stops him in his tracks. He was drunk too, perfect. If I shot him he probably wouldn’t even feel it. “You gonna shoot me, Rion?”

“I don’t want to,” I warn him. “But if you make a play for Tony, I will.”

“Tony?” he laughs. “You fuck me over for a pussy looking bitch named Tony?”

“Rion,” Tony says, calmly reaching his hand out. “Give me the gun.”

“Negative,” I tell him. “Someone needs to learn how to knock before he enters the room assuming the worst.”

“I wanted to trust you,” he roars so loud the veins come out of his neck. Keeping myself calm I remind myself of several things. First, I’m the one with the gun. Second, Tony has a wife and daughter to get home safely to and third, Loyal has some serious trust issues and was a mean drunk.

“You should have trusted me,” I tell him calmly. “This is Tony Gallo, he’s the husband of my friend Lina. You remember me mentioning her, right? Oh good, then you’ll remember the part where I said they agreed to help me locate your fucking brother!” I end on a scream.

“Is it safe for me to leave, Rion? Or do you prefer I stay or possibly call for backup?”

“You can go, Tony thanks,” I tell him. “Tell Lina the next one’s on the house.”

Walking straight up to Loyal he says, “Anything happens to her, something even worse will happen to you.” Then looking back at me he says as he walks out. “Bet on it.”

Standing there completely pissed and totally embarrassed, I set the gun down and it hits me how wrong this is. All of it was wrong and I had to break the cycle. “I need you to go,” I tell him.

“I shouldn’t have drank,” he says quietly. “I’ll be back in the morning after---“

Cutting him off I put my hand up. “No, I need you to go and not come back.”

“Rion, I misunderstood---”

“You know what? This isn’t even about me. Tony has a newborn daughter! He came here after work as a favor to you! He came here because Lina was home with a sick baby!”

“I didn’t know---”

“You never know because you never stop and ask first. Now you do know,” I whisper. “And this lying whore needs to get some sleep. See yourself out.”

“I’m begging you not to do this,” he says, walking toward me. “I fucked up just let me---”

“I can’t let you anymore! That’s what you see when you see me? A lying whore? You’ve been waiting for me to prove you right! Was this all a test? I lost my best friend for
you
! I see a god damn shrink to help you! I cry myself to sleep at night because you’re not here! I molded my life to yours because you asked me to! You don’t want help! You want justification! I can’t justify what happened to you. Or what Jill did to you. I can’t justify only being your friend either. I just can’t---“”

When he pulls me to him and attempts to kiss me, I broke away wiping his taste from my mouth. “You’re too late, Loyal. You just ran out of chances.”

The room was deathly quiet, the only sound was our erratic breathing until the phone rang. “Yep,” I answer.

“Rion?” asks Lina, “You okay? Are we killing somebody? I haven’t killed anyone since I gave birth, I need a night out.”

“I’m okay Lina,” I tell her. “He just left.”

He hadn’t left. He still stood there looking like he was going to hyperventilate but he hadn’t left. Lina gabs for another minute before we disconnect then when I set my phone down, I stepped into another dimension.

The one where Loyal Hart fell to his knees in front of me.

‘You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough.’

~ Frank Crane

The fear of loss took me over. Even my buzz evaporated the moment I felt her quit. Having no idea what else to do because I knew she was dead serious, I hit the ground. Dropping my head and leaning into her stomach, I wrap my arms around her and it just happens. I start to cry. Gripping her, I cry harder. When she grips me back, I somehow pulled her down to the floor with me. She didn’t let me go and I couldn’t let her go. Words fall from my mouth and even I don’t understand them, I don’t want to either. I just know that my bullshit had to stop and it needed to stop now.

“Shh,” she says, soothing me. “It’s okay.” Minutes go by and still she holds me. “Loyal,” she whispers, “look at me, please.”

Slowly pulling my head up, her eyes meet mine and I see the damage I’ve caused. By lashing out at her, keeping her at arm’s length, asking her to be friends knowing how she feels and the latest nightmare with Tony, was too much for her. “This has to stop,” she says softly. “What we’re doing to each other has to stop.”

“I can’t be friends with you anymore,” I tell her and when her eyes close in anguish, I see she’s misunderstood me. But it also hit me she loved me more than I ever thought possible too. “You’re my woman. I need my woman.”

“You have to be sure,” she says, touching my face. “Don’t say this just to keep me around. You have to mean it. If you mean it then everything we’ve been doing changes. If you want this with me, no more secrets, no more excuses.”

“Fuck, you make me better, Rion. You. Not the therapy, not the meds, you do. With you I can function. I’ll go over to his place and apologize, I’ll---”

“Until a doctor says otherwise, you continue therapy and the meds. I’ll give you his number because he deserves an apology. You either trust me or you don’t. I don’t need an answer right now, but you best think on it. I won’t have another repeat of tonight. You get that, right?”

“I won’t use up any more chances,” I whisper. “I heard you on the phone yesterday; I thought you were seeing someone else.”

“I wouldn’t do that to you,” she says. “How can you spend all this time with me and not know that?”

“Because I wouldn’t blame you if you did.”

“In thirty years I’ve said I love you to one man. Senior,” she says, resting her head on my shoulder. “Until I met you.”

“Can’t lose you,” I whisper, holding her tighter than I should.

“Be honest with me and you won’t,” she whispers back, “I promise.”

Standing us both up, she takes the extra cushions off the couch to make room for two bodies while I grab the blankets. Walking into her room to get them, I look at her unmade bed and see she’d slept on my side. The pillow I used had dents in it and there was tissue everywhere. She really did cry for me. I knew it was time to man up. No more losing my shit, taking it out on her. It was time to trust her. The weight that used to feel like a cancer suddenly lifted when I went all in for her. She wasn’t aware that it was happening but the timing of her head on my chest couldn’t be better. My heart was beating freely for the first time and she could hear it. Curling up next to her and pulling her close, there was no more talking, no fighting and no fucking. We just needed to be close to each other and I fell asleep that way.

Even though I was too big for the couch, it was still the best night’s sleep I’d ever had.

‘Men like gifts. If the gift has a motor, odds are you’ll never do dishes again.’

~Senior

Waking up with him wrapped around me was perfect. Watching him take deep breaths and running my fingers over his stubble was even better. Careful not to wake him, I jump in the shower wanting to be back when he woke up. Feeling hopeful could be foolish, but I had to trust myself on this one. Loyal is struggling with a lot of shit, I promised him patience and I needed to deliver. Trust was a huge issue for him and obviously it was missing from past relationships, especially with Jill.

I had no secrets to speak of but seeing how easily he flipped the switch, I had to be conscious of everything. As long as he tried, I would be okay with it. We could do this. Others may say this is toxic or dangerous even, but he needs me and I need him too. No relationship is perfect. We’re going to have moments where it’s messy and difficult followed by easy and safe. Love is a risk I’ve been waiting a long time to take. Loyal was a risk period, but in my heart I knew he was worth it.

Drying off, I throw on a robe not in a rush to head across the hall yet. Between Loyal and Rio the business was no longer in the red. There’s that moment in the beginning of any new season that people see their team win a few and they go all in. They get invested in their team and that’s how I make money. Especially, when Detroit is my market. We weren’t exactly rolling, but we weren’t drowning either and we had a lot of spare time.

My credit was still good and I was thinking maybe it was time to get him another vehicle. He needs his independence even if he fights me on it. He said he was a truck guy and Ford has a pretty slick F-150 out right now. Noise from the kitchen had me making a right instead of a left. When I came in behind him and wrapped my arms around him.

“Good morning,” I say kissing his back. “Sleep okay?”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Tell you what?”

Turning to face me, I can see he’s pissed but we just fucking woke up. “About the letter, Rion,” he growls. “The fucking letter!”

“Oh no, no, no,” I growl right back. “Don’t you fucking dare. I got that letter only yesterday then Tony came by and you know what happened next. I forgot about it, but now that it’s this morning’s convo, what do you think?”

“What do I think? I think someone is trying to scare the shit out of you. That’s what I think.”

“I have you,” I tell him going up on my toes to kiss his cheek, “therefore, it didn’t work.”

“Rion---”

“We have shit to do,” I tell him. “Get dressed. I’m not asking, Loyal.”

Grinding his jaw, he puts a shirt on but I didn’t care about that. What I cared about was the way his muscles bunched and contracted
while
he put the shirt on. At that moment, I was extremely horny and wondering why he gave in so easily.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he growls sliding his belt through the loops.

“Like what?” I ask, wanting him to slide inside of me like that.

“Like you wanna fuck.”

“But I do wanna fuck,” I say smiling.

“Dammit Rion, you know why we can’t.”

“Fine,” I pout. “If fucking's off the menu, let’s go with the next best thing then.”

“What’s that?”

“Guess you’ll just have to trust me to find out.”

Heading over to the dealership off Michigan Avenue, I can feel his desire like my own. Between the two of us I was shocked my car needed fuel. If your sex drive could power a car, mine would be a turbo. Note to self: write a letter to Ford motor company.

Parking in the customer lot, I see him eyeing a black on black pickup like it was his best fantasy come to life. I could see he wanted to touch it, climb inside of it and stay there. Shaking my head before I had an orgasm in broad daylight, I let him know I’m grabbing a salesman and instructed him to browse.

When my salesman found me, I kept it simple. I filled out the paperwork, cut him a check for the deposit and plate transfer from my E-class to this one.  When he asked me which truck I wanted, I pointed out the window to where Loyal was practically dry humping the truck and said, “That one.”

“Give me forty minutes,” he says handing me the keys and walking off.

Heading back outside, I lean on the truck and ask him, “You look like a man who just fell in love with all eight cylinders.”

“This truck is---” he tries getting it out but is too caught up in wanting what he didn’t think he could have to finish the sentence.

“Yours,” I tell him tossing him the keys.

The look on his face is fucking priceless. Loyal has many ‘faces’ but this was the one I wanted to again.

It was called shock.