Awakening the Wolf (12 page)

“Strange, how?”

Christopher shrugged. “When have wolf matters ever interested you?”

She hit him on the shoulder. “When did you stop telling me everything? Or is this the new-and-improved Christopher who’s going to be an ass to me?”

He chuckled. “It might be best if we aren’t friends, just to keep things safe between us.”

“I don’t think things are ever going to be safe between us, nor will my feelings for you change. If I can’t have you in my life the way I truly want you, then at least we can still be friends or at least try to be.”

He ran his finger along the line of her collarbone and touched her necklace. “Friends will be difficult. We both have these feelings for one another that will never stop. If things go the way they are supposed to, then you’ll end up ruling your flock and I’ll rule the pack. We’ll have a working relationship, and that still won’t solve our problem. This is the best thing for us: to part ways and be mated without ever thinking back. This is the last time we can be together. I wish we could make this more. You don’t know how much I want you.” He leaned in and brushed her lips once more with a quick kiss before nibbling down her throat. He inhaled and then pulled away to look at her strangely. “Are you wearing perfume?”

Her heart stopped. Had he recognized her scent? Illiana had discovered that after her shifts from wolf to raven form that each animal form had a different smell to it she could detect on her clothes, but in human form her scent was a mixture of both. She prayed he would not figure it out. “Just a scent my aunt gave me. Do you like it?”

He searched her eyes, but she kept a straight face. “It’s nice, kinda musky like a wolf scent.”

“Yeah. I think that was what she was going for.”

“Well, it suits you.” Christopher pulled away and straightened his clothes, returning to the wolf he was. “You know this is for the best. Just being friends.”

Illiana nodded and felt her tension drain away. He had not discovered her ruse. The way things were now, she understood what he was saying. “I know. This is for the best.”

“We should get back, or they’ll think we’re getting a little bit too close.”

She turned to leave, but Christopher grabbed her arm. “The next full moon the pack and the ravens are having a gathering to celebrate our continued peace. Will you be there?”

“I’d planned on it. When are you going to be mated?”

“I was hoping you weren’t going to bring that up. It’ll be the full moon after that. I don’t think it’d be in your best interest to come. I don’t want to see you get hurt.” Christopher cupped her cheek and brushed his lips across hers. “I’m sorry.”

“You can’t keep apologizing for everything that’s happened or going to happen.”

“I guess you’re right. Let’s get back.”

Illiana nodded. “Okay.”

They returned to the clearing. Illiana found Belik’s clothes on the ground under one of the trees. Jalisa was lounging near the bottom of the tree. She glanced up and saw a raven staring down at them. Jalisa had a devious smile on her face.

“What did you do?” she snapped.

Jalisa got up and stepped closer to her. “I wanted to get to know him a little bit better. And he looked so tasty.”

“You bitch.” Before Illiana could stop herself, she slapped Jalisa across the face with all the force she could muster, turning Jalisa’s head with the hit. The other woman growled and pounced on her, which sent them both to the ground. Jalisa slashed at her face and caught her across the cheek. Illiana winced at the pain. The fire element in her burned at her mind and stirred the wolf, but she held it in check. Now was not the time to let them see who she truly was. Although it would feel good to tear Christopher’s future mate limb from limb.

Jalisa slashed at her, but she put up her hands to protect her face. Illiana wiggled underneath her and got her leg free enough so that she brought her knee up and caught Jalisa in the stomach. Before she could fit in another blow, Jalisa was removed from on top of her. Christopher dragged Jalisa away, and Belik offered his hand to her. She smiled and took it. He touched her cheek.

“Did she hurt you?” Belik asked.

Illiana shook her head, feeling the sting of the scratches on her cheek. “I’m fine.”

“What about these?” He touched her cheek.

“They should be fine. I don’t think they’re deep.” She saw the concern in his eye—and the sincerity. Illiana raked her gaze over his naked body, and she took in the firmness of his muscles. His body might have been wiry, but he was built in all the right places. Her attraction to him flared to life. His hair hung loose to the middle of his back. She met his dark eyes and lost all sense of time, knowing that he yearned to be with her and her heart was opening to him.

“Let me go, Chris!” Jalisa screamed.

“I told you not to mess with Illiana.”

“You make it sound like she’s the one you really want to be with. What about me?”

“It’s not like that. We’re friends. We have been since we were kids.” Christopher threw up his hands.

Illiana sighed and walked over to the two wolves. “Christopher’s right. We’re only friends. Why would he want to be with me when we’re different species?”

“This is none of your concern, birdy. Go fly away before I decide to eat you this time,” Jalisa growled.

She held in her anger. “You were the one who went after my future mate. How would you feel if I tried to attack Christopher? You’d want my head, right? Next time you decide to go after Belik, I won’t just slap you.”

Jalisa smiled, pulling her lips up into a sneer. “And next time I see you anywhere near my mate, I’ll make sure you will get more than a scratch.”

Christopher pulled the woman away from her. “I think it’s time to go. Illiana, I’ll see you at the clan gathering.” He pushed Jalisa out of the clearing, and Illiana watched until they were gone and turned back to Belik.

“Are you okay?” she asked him.

“I’ll be fine. She startled me at first and then got more aggressive. I decided it was safer to be in the trees where she couldn’t get me.” He chuckled. “There was no way I could take her if I wanted, but you did a good job at clobbering her.”

“Not as much as I wanted to.”

“What were you talking about?” Belik asked her.

Illiana bit her lip. It would be easy to lie to him, but that was the last thing she wanted to do. Belik had shown her he was not afraid of what she was or by facing the ridicule of the flock by being interested in her. He was determined and not about to give up. Not after pursing her for three months. He was not going to abandon her in a time of need. Her heart swelled. Jalisa had probably said something hurtful about her, and Belik had defended her honor. The encounter had probably started a fight between them, and she did not blame him for wanting to get away from Jalisa. Any kind of skirmish between wolves and ravens would disrupt the balance with the two species, and it would not be good. It also meant her feelings and actions with Christopher would disrupt the flow of things, but she could not stop now. Christopher had admitted he loved her and said he wanted to be with her. The barriers between them were the only things keeping them apart. She had to join the pack. That was the only way that Illiana could rightfully consider being with him. Then there was Belik. She was not about to give up on him either. He had already done so much for her by believing what she said and not running away screaming when she turned into a wolf.

“I know you love him, Illiana. That’s plain to see from you looking at him. From what you’ve told me, I know I can’t wipe him out of your heart.”

A moment of panic went through her. “I’m not asking you to. I’m not asking you to be like him or . . . ”

He held up his hand. “I knew getting into this that your heart belonged to another. And I am okay with that because I wanted you to see that I can be good for you, too. Now I know that because you are part wolf that you’re going to be drawn to him no matter what. I’m willing to share you, but you have to be honest with me. I won’t tell your secrets, but respect me enough not to lie to me.”

She felt defeated and knew he was correct. He had come into this knowing what he was getting involved in, and the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him. “I wasn’t planning on lying to you. I know we don’t know each other all that well yet, but I want to know you. Christopher is hard for me to wrap my head around. I can’t see straight when I get around him. Jalisa makes me so mad.”

Belik chuckled. “That’s an understatement. I think she makes everyone angry. She pushes all of my buttons.” He stopped and caressed her cheek. “She said some things about you, and I wasn’t about to get into some kind of brawl with her. That was the only reason I went into the trees. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to defend you, but . . . ”

Illiana nodded. She completely understood his position, but she found herself enamored with the way his mouth formed around the words. A slight dimple that appeared in his upper left cheek. She captured his mouth in a kiss. He stopped abruptly and stiffened, and she could feel his cock harden and push into her thigh. It stirred her own desires. Now was not the time for her to think about bedding him, so she broke away and felt her cheeks heat at the thought of them together. “Sorry.”

“Nice way to avoid my question.” Belik walked over and put his pants back on. She was kind of sorry that he did.

“I didn’t mean it as a distraction. I found the little dimple in your cheek irresistible. I wasn’t dodging your question.”

Belik’s face reddened some. “You find me irresistible? Well, that is a step in the right direction. Do you also find Christopher irresistible?”

She sighed. “Ever since I was a teenager. All these years we hung out and I thought I had a crush on him, but it turned into more. He told me he wanted to be with me, but we couldn’t. You already know that. I asked him if I were a wolf, if it would be possible for us to be together.”

“You want to join the pack,” Belik stated simply and tied the sash on his pants.

“Yes. I think it’s the only way for me to have Christopher, but I also want you in my life, too. I never thought I’d have someone from the flock who wanted to be with me. And you showed me that was possible. If you don’t want any of this or don’t want to be part of my life because of it, I understand.” She prayed that he would not walk away. But she had put a lot before him and was not sure how he was going to react.

Belik did not bother to put his shirt back on and approached her. He ran his fingers down her arms, and that made her shiver. “I’m not going anywhere. Although there is one thing I want from you first.”

“What is that?”

“You.”

“You already have me,” she said.

He trailed his finger over her shoulder and down her breast until he cupped it. Belik brushed his thumb over her nipple. It firmed, and she sucked in a breath.

“Are you so sure about that? You don’t know how long I’ve thought about this. How much I desire you. It’s my wish to someday be your mate. If you’ll have me.”

She didn’t know what to say. Of course she had slept with other members of the flock before. They had approached her, more of a taboo, and enticed her to have sex, but she knew it meant nothing. Those she had been with before had only wanted to count her for a conquest. Then again, they sated her needs as well. Belik did not want to have her for another notch on his belt. But was it a good idea to take this step with him now? She chewed her lip for a moment. Even if all of this was an elaborate hoax, a ruse to just claim he had had sex with her, it had been a long time since she had been with anyone. Her emotions were all riled up, and the fire stirred inside of her. It only made the need for release all the more insatiable.

“I saw how you looked at me before when I was naked. You desired me.”

She nodded. “I do. I mean you are very attractive. I just —”

“Want to be sure I’m not going to leave you after the first time? Maybe this is all a game to me? That all of this might frighten me away?”

“Yes. That’s part of it.”

Belik brushed a stray hair from her cheek. The gentle caress of his fingers on her skin made her heart skip a beat. The longer she was around him, the more she was falling for him. It was a gentle fall, where she was learning to trust her emotions with Belik. As with Christopher, everything always blazed. “I won’t ever hurt you. I’ll go with you wherever you go. Please say yes,” he whispered against her ear and nibbled on it.

“Yes.” All her self-doubt about being with him fell away. This was the first step for her to learn to trust another of her own kind.

Belik traced the expanse of Illiana’s jaw. His supple caress trailed down her cheek and over the line of her throat. The pleasure of his touch wound through her and settled between her legs. He pressed his lips to the top of her right breast and ran his tongue over it until he stopped at her heart. He left his mouth there. His other hand slipped under her dress and down her belly, tickling a line until he stopped at her navel. Illiana drew in a quick breath, never taking her eyes from his. The fire inside of her had fanned out and rode her nerves almost as if it were using them for fuel. The longer he touched her, the more turned-on she was.

“Are you afraid?” he asked.

She stared into his eyes and saw the trepidation in his as well. Her stomach quivered from the idea of what was going to happen with them. Illiana wanted it to happen, but it was crossing a line she thought she would never cross. He was giving her a choice.

“I’m not afraid. Are you?”

“To be honest, I’ve thought about this for a long time. I want you so bad. I can hardly believe this is happening. I don’t want you to be disappointed.”

She shook her head. “I don’t want
you
to be dissatisfied. You have me up on a pedestal I don’t deserve to be on.”

Belik squeezed her breast until she gasped. “You have every right to be on that pedestal and up so much higher. All the others who spurned you are fools. And I won’t be disappointed. Everything about you is beautiful.”

His words made her smile. She undid the sash that held her dress closed and slipped it off, leaving on the scarf and her necklace. It fell to the ground and left her naked before him. She took in a deep breath and then met his gaze once more, feeling completely vulnerable.