Beautiful Strangers (12 page)

  
Jaxson cocks his head to the
side like he wants to know as well.

  
“The fucks it to you blondie?”
he snaps clearly not telling. Sadie’s mouth drops as does mine. Evan is a prick
but something has crawled up his ass.

  
“Evan don’t be rude,” I weakly
smile at him. Before more can be said the video begins to play on a jumbo
screen that was brought in for the occasion.

    
My cheeks flush when I hear
myself say three little words, I love you, to Jaxson. I can see him looking at
me from across the table out the corner of my eye and I notice Sadie is staring
a hole through him.

  
Then out of nowhere Evan says,
“Excuse me Grace but I refuse to sit here and watch the three of you mind fuck
with each other. I’m out,” and he walks right out the door.

   
Sadie and I both giggle at the
same time and I don’t know what in the hell just came over Evan.

 
Sadie decides to speak, “wow
Grace you really have a way with men.”

    
Then Jax decides it’s time to
put his two cents in, “shut the fuck up Sadie! I need a moment alone to speak
with Gracie.”

   
“But things just got
interesting.” She smiles excusing herself from the table. Jax is giving her the
stink eye, daring her to speak, as she makes her way to the bar.

   
“Grace you are acting like an
immature bitch and I will not tolerate this shit your trying to pull. We need
to talk but this isn’t the place. And I assume you have to work tonight and I
have another early interview in the morning. So I will come by your place when
I am finished. I should just take you over my knee right now after the way you
have acted today! Enjoy the rest of your night.” And with that he is gone.

  
Damn, I cleared two men from the
room in less than ten minutes, and it looks as if I get to try to make it three
as Ritchie approaches me.

   
“Have you talked to Jocelyn
recently?’ he asked.

  
“Not since Saturday, why do you
ask?”

  
“She hasn’t showed up the past
two days, but no big deal, just let me know if you hear from her. Oh by the
way, you looked outstanding in the video.”

   
Jocelyn never showed for work
that night and I didn’t bother trying to talk to Jaxson or Evan either. I made
it through my shift and I can’t name one song I danced to. I have had the worst
day, I just want to go to bed and start over tomorrow.

   
My dreams that night were of
everything and everyone. I saw shades of red and images of Jocelyn. I kept
trying to grab her arm and beg her to stay, but she would only drift further
away. Sadie was there holding Jaxson’s hand and pulling him into the darkness.
Evan was there as well clouded by a purple haze promising to make it all go
away. Then I was alone, and lost walking down an old dirt road that ended in a
three-way, I couldn’t decide which way to turn.

  
I feel as if there is so much
weight on my shoulders; I feel like I am a volcano about to erupt. I know I
need to lay it all on the line with Jaxson. I’m scared but he deserves better
than I can give. I’d rather feel a thousand aches of my heart shredding than
hurt him. He has given me every part of him and I’ve never been able to share
myself completely, with him or anyone for that matter.

 
I awake to my head busting and a
nose bleed, wonderful.

  
I get cleaned up and wait to see
if Jaxson shows and I’m not sure what to expect from him. Or even what I want
from him. I try to call Jojo but no luck, what’s with her? She always takes my
calls.

    
Jaxson blows me off, something
about having to go out of town for an appearance on a late night talk show.
Looks like I have managed to run everyone off. I decide to take the high road.
I call Evan to apologize for using him. Even though he has used me plenty it’s
the right thing to do. He offers to treat me to an early dinner before I go to
work. I agree to go. He seems to be the only one who wants my company.

  
I wasn’t expecting to be met by
paparazzi when I left my apartment. What would they want with photos of me?
Then I realize it isn’t me that they are following when Sadie slides into the
passenger seat of my car.

  
“What do you think you are
doing?”

  
“I thought we could hangout, and
get to know each other. Jax says he invited you to go on the road with us.”

  
Is this bitch for real?

 
 
I am not “hanging out” with her.

  
“Sorry to burst your bubble
peaches, but I have dinner plans.” I reach over and pop the bubble she just
blew with her gum for added effect.

  
“I don’t mind, who are we
dinning with?”

  
“What is with this we shit? We are
not friends, and my date doesn’t include you.”

 
“Oh, a date
huh?
Do tell; is it that sexy asshole from last night?
 
Because I have to say I am glad you aren’t
falling for Jaxson’s whole lover routine. I mean he is dreamy but there is so
much about him that you know nothing about and couldn’t possibly understand. A
little advice from one who knows; once he gets what he wants, he never wants it
again. You’d be smart to use him to boost your modeling career. That’s what you
after right?”

  
“I don’t want anything from
Jaxson, and as far as what I am after, right now I would appreciate you getting
the fuck out of my car! I don’t know what kind of games you and Jaxson play but
the two of you can leave me out of them.”

    
“You really are clueless
Grace. Now I know what he sees in you.” She laughs and I barely give her the
chance to shut the door before I peel out of my parking space.

Fucking with my head!

    
I meet Evan at the restaurant
where we had our first real date. I don’t know what I am doing. What did Sadie
mean by things I didn’t know? I try to push her and Jaxson from head when I see
Evan walking towards me. Damn he is fine. Would I have been better off not
knowing the truth about him? No, and that is exactly why I plan on finding out
what princess was up to earlier. But right now I am going to live in the
moment.

   
Evan draws in close and places
a kiss on my cheek. I try not to blush, but he has a power of me that no matter
how hard I try, I can’t ignore my feelings for him any longer

  
“I’m glad you showed. I was
afraid you might stand me up after last night.”

  
“I owe you an apology Evan. I
used you to make Jax jealous. It was immature and thoughtless.”

  
“After everything I have done
how can you apologize to me Gracie?
 
I
had you come here because I am hoping you will really hear me out. Give me a
fair shot. That is all I am asking.”

   
“I’d be lying if I said I don’t
think about it Evan. What we could have had if the drugs, and the lies had
never come between us. But they did and I don’t want to lead you on or give you
false hope.”

   
The waiter comes to take our
orders giving me a few minutes to decide how I want the rest of this evening to
go. I don’t know where I stand with Jax. Hell I don’t even know if I want to
know after the conversation I just had with Sadie. I don’t want to make false
promises when I just don’t know.

  
“Sometimes I think that we know
each other so completely and then I think back to all the lies and I wonder if
we ever really knew one another Evan.”

   
Evan grabs my left wrist and
turns it over and traces his index finger over my infinity tattoo. “Grace, do
you remember what I said to you when I ask you to get this put here?”

  
“Yes, I remember, you told me
that every time I saw this tattoo you wanted me to know that when you said
forever, that you meant it.” I say drawing my wrist back and remembering that
very moment. I had thought Evan was going to propose but what he did really
surprised me.

    
Evan knew how badly I had
wanted to get a tattoo but I was scared. You wouldn’t know it now, because I
have so many.

   
It was our one year
anniversary. We were supposed to go out for a fancy dinner when he took me to a
tattoo parlor instead. “Babe,” he had said getting down bended knee, “I don’t
have a fancy ring and I think we are too young to get married, but I want to
make a promise to you, that I will always love you no matter what. You will
always hold my heart. So I picked out a tattoo for you. You don’t have to get
it if you don’t want to.”
 

   
How could I say no, when I saw
what he had decided on. It was a beautiful infinity symbol with a Celtic heart
in the middle. He had said that each loop represented him and me and that the
heart in the middle was our two hearts beating as one and that the knot in the
middle of it all was holding us together. And that every time I looked at my
wrist he wanted me to remember his promise and how much he loved me.

   
When I think about moments like
those how could I not love Evan? I know he has done me wrong on so many levels
but I think we could have a happy life together. I want to believe that
everything he has said is true, and that we really do know one another and that
we aren’t strangers after all.

    
But on the other hand I have
Jaxson who draws me in like a magnet, but is it love or lust? I think Jaxson
could care for me but doesn’t know me the way that Evan does. My brain feels
fizzled out. I had thought I knew what I wanted until yesterday. The waiter
brings our food and we both dig in trying to avoid anymore heavy conversation.

  
“Look I only
want
to say this and then I won’t bring it up again. I have been thinking a lot
about what you said, about being a better man. I did do it for me. You just
gave me the push that I needed. And I am ready now to be that man. The man you
thought I was and more. Let me be that man for you.”

  
“Evan I want to give you both
the benefit of the doubt and a second chance. But I would be lying if I told
you that I don’t have feelings for Jax. I owe it to myself to find out what they
are before I try to figure us out. I know it’s not fair and I am not asking you
to wait for me.”

   
“I can and will be waiting
Grace, I know you love me and I am patient enough to let you figure it out for
yourself. I won’t push you. So don’t shut me out, I am still your friend.”

   
We part ways with the
understanding that Evan is going to give me time to figure out what’s really in
my heart. If he can really give me the space that I need then he might stand a
chance.

There is nothing to say….

    
After two days I hear from Jax
and he is acting as if nothing happened. I don’t want to push my luck so I let
sleeping dogs lie. We make plans to meet at his penthouse after I get off work.

  
Jaxson’s music video has
attracted a lot of attention to the club so Ritchie has given me three solos in
the lineup tonight. I’m not complaining its more money in my pocket. Jocelyn is
actually here tonight. I feel like I haven’t talked to her in weeks.

  
“Hey doll,” she gives me a tight
squeeze. “I have been meaning to call you back, but Robert has had me so busy.
Let’s have lunch tomorrow and I will fill you in.” Jojo seems off, like she is
on edge about something. But I don’t have time to worry about it, time to go
shake my ass.

  
Tonight’s crowd is rowdy; I
can’t even walk the floor like I normally would. The night passes by me in a
daze. I felt like some of the girls including Jocelyn were a little put off by
the extra attention I was getting. But there isn’t much I can do about it. It
isn’t like I have come down with a severe case of hey look at me.

    
I arrive at Jax’s penthouse
only to be met by Ray, who informs me that Jax had something to take care of
and he would be back as soon as he could to make myself comfortable. I want to
get cleaned up before Jax gets back, after I’ve shook my ass and sweated all
night. I go for a swim in his garden tub.

   
Even though it is nearly
3 A.M.
, I order some dessert while I wait for
him to arrive. I have a bit of a sweet tooth so I decide to order a chocolate
fudge sundae with sprinkles, so good but too many of these this late at night
and I will be packing the pounds back on.

   
Jax returns looking very
pleased to find that I am here waiting for him. He cocks an eyebrow at my
unfinished sundae and with a devilish grin he unties my robe and orders me to
lie back on the sofa, he takes my spoon in one hand and pins my wrist down with
other. I wiggle trying to free myself but his grip is firm. I shriek and giggle
wondering just what he plans to do with the rest of my dessert.

     
He slowly spoons the vanilla
and chocolate onto my chest. “Just what I ordered, a Gracie sundae.” He says
devouring the ice cream and fudge from my breasts. He leans up to give me a
sticky kiss. He lets go of my wrist. I pull him down on me by that messy black
hair of his that I love so much.

  
“No fair, you are wearing way
too many clothes.” I whisper into his ear. He dips a finger inside me.