Broken (Broken #1) (29 page)

“
I was just
trying to be nice, besides, I didn’t actually look. I only
glanced,” he sighs and places my bag on his shoulder.

“
That’s what
they all say.”

“
Who?” He
doesn’t actually sound interested, more irritated and bored of my
teasing.

“
Men who’re
caught going through your underwear drawer,” I joke and elbow him
in the arm.

He sighs again and gives me a
gentle nudge towards the stairs, “Quickly before I change my mind
and give you a cardboard box and a single nappy to live on.”

“
Ouch,” I
grin and make my way towards the stairs. “I’ll wait in the car.” He
nods and throws me his keys, sighing – yet again – when I don’t
catch them. They bounce down the stairs before sliding along the
floor a few inches.

“
Bad throw,”
I comment before he can tell me I’m a bad catcher.

Which I am, but he doesn’t need
to rub it in my face.

He responds with a scoff of
disbelief as I scoop them up from the ground and rush out of the
house. The air is chilly today, a tell-tale sign that autumn will
soon be upon us. I don’t mind autumn so much, it’s winter that I
can’t stand. I’m more of a warm day on the beach kind of girl. Or I
used to be at least. Not anymore. Not the thrill of all of that
seems much more like nonsense now when I don’t have my favourite
person in the world to spend it with.

Soon I’ll have another person,
I climb into the car stroking my belly. I wonder if giving birth to
the baby will take away the pain. Maybe it will fill that gaping
hole in my heart.

Nathan climbs into the car ten
minutes later and we set off for the city. This time it only takes
us an hour and a half, the traffic wasn’t too bad on the way.

I’m so excited by the time we
get there, that I barely let him stop the car before I’m out and
around to his side. This will be a great thing to focus on. Plus,
what woman doesn’t want to decorate a nursery?

“
Which room
will be the nursery? We haven’t discussed it,” I ask as I place my
hand on his arm and allow him to guide me along the busy
street.

“
There are
two more rooms on your floor. Take your pick.”

“
Which room
was Caleb’s?”

He looks down at me, his face a
blank mask, “He didn’t have a room.”

“
He didn’t?”
That seems a bit odd. “What about you?”

“
Me neither,
I’m staying in my grandfather’s room. Although I had it remodelled
when I first moved in.”

I chew on the inside of my
cheek for a moment, wondering whether or not I should push further.
Of course I should. It’s in my nature to push. “You two must have
been close?”

“
That’s one
way to put it,” he mutters conspiratorially. “Here.”

“
This is a
brand store,” I gawp at ‘Baby Dreams’, a pregnant woman’s dream and
the expectant father’s nightmare. “This is too much.”

“
I can afford
it,” he states and pulls me through the automatic doors.

I’m immediately assaulted by a
welcome blast of cool air from the fans in the ceiling. But it’s
not this that makes me shiver, it’s the store itself. I’m in baby
heaven.

“
I should
have written a list,” I mumble as I take a few cautious steps
forward.

“
We’ll start
with the big things and work our way down.” Releasing his arm I
head into the section where nurseries have been set up with a
single wall behind each.

They’re all so cute and homely.
I can’t wait to start papering and painting the walls.

“
I love
this,” I say as my eyes immediately zoom in on a strange green
colour wall with white tree patters reaching to the top. The
furniture is dark brown and glossy and I’m in love. “I really love
this. It’s neutral and it’s… holy… mother of…” I start to choke
when I see the price tag. It’s not extremely expensive but it’s a
lot more money than I considered spending on just the heavy
furniture.

“
You’re
sure?” He smiles at my look of shock. “You’re sure.”

Three hours later my ankles
have swollen so we make our way to a nearby restaurant to stop for
lunch. Nathan hasn’t said much although he insisted on glass
bottles for the baby and everything that isn’t made of harmful
plastic. I’m not even allowed disposable nappies but I don’t mind
the washable ones, they’re pretty easy and last years. They have
little poppers instead of Velcro and can be adjusted as the baby
sizes up.

He even made me order the wool
and water wet wipes, completely toxin and fragrance free.

After a while I let him take
over, I wasn’t in any position to argue seeing as he’d done
research and I clearly hadn’t, I was happy that at least one of us
knew what we were talking about. He won’t even consider me using
powdered milk and insists breast is best, which is right but also
annoying. I was going to breast feed anyway but I don’t like being
told I have to.

I’m happy with the amount we
got, I can’t think of anything else we need right now. Secondly I
can’t wait until it’s all delivered and I get to see it set up.

Something else to look forward
to.

We’re seated at a table right
at the back of the restaurant, out of the view of others. It’s a
booth so I have to push the table out to fit inside which is
annoying but I soon cheer up when I see the menu. It’s very diverse
and I am starving.

“
Ordered
enough food?” He jokes, sliding closer to me.

I shake my head, “I want desert
too.”

“
Have
whatever you want,” he smiles and glances at my stomach. “It’s the
only time of your life you have an excuse to eat like a very large
man.”

I laugh at this and rest my
temple on his shoulder, “You know? I can’t even remember why I was
mad at you before.”

His cheek rubs against my hair
and I’m instantly reminded of our time on the Ferris wheel. “Good,
I don’t like it when you’re mad.”

“
Then stop
peeing me off,” I tilt my head back and look at him through my
lashes. “Reckon you can handle that for more than a few
hours?”

“
I’ll try,”
he responds quietly and presses his lips to my forehead. “You
always smell like vanilla.”

Umm… “That’ll be the shampoo I
use, and the body lotion.”

“
It’s good,”
he murmurs. I feel his hand slide onto the cushioned bench between
us, his gloved pinkie finger is so close to mine I can feel the
leather tickling the tiny hairs. My hand moves closer, only
slightly,

The waitress comes and for some
reason I move away after feeling a pang of guilt for being so close
to another man. What is wrong with me?

We fall silent after ordering,
Nathan taps away at his phone as I twiddle my thumbs and wait for
the food to arrive.

“
Oh my god,
Nathan?” A high pitched squeal comes from an unknown female with
dark wavy hair and a smile wider than the world itself. “When
Tracey called…”

Nathan stares at the female for
a moment, “Diane?”

“
Umm… yes,”
she puts her hands on her hips and pouts like an infant. “You do
remember me don’t you?”

“
Do you?” I
tease him which earns me a glare.

Her eyes immediately come to me
and her smile drops. I’m hardly invisible. “Who’s your friend?”

“
None of your
concern,” he bites out and leans forward. “Can I help you with
anything, Diane?”

I shrink in my seat, this is
awkward.

She hesitates for a moment,
“No, I just wanted to say hi.”

“
And who was
it that told you I was here?” He’s definitely irritated.

The waitress chooses this
moment to bring out our food, I sit up and thank her on a whisper.
She senses the tense atmosphere and quietly slinks away, I don’t
blame her. I feel like hiding under the table right now.

“
Tracey
called, she saw you come in. Though she didn’t mention her,” She
nods to me and frowns. I give her a little finger wag and stare at
my food. Should I start eating without him? Yes I
should.

“
Okay, well
hello Diane,” He gives her a pointed look. She just doesn’t get it.
“Goodbye, Diane.”

Finally she blinks herself out
of her stupor, “Call me.”

“
Honestly?” I
can feel his anger. Ooh, she brought me sauces. “I could be sat
here with my wife.”

She looks at me, “You his
wife?”

I open my mouth to respond but
think better of it and continue testing the dips with spiced potato
wedges.

“
You need to
leave,” Nathan warns, his eyes narrowed. “And next time you see me,
don’t acknowledge me.” Ouch, that one has to hurt.

Her mouth falls open and pain
flashes across her eyes, “Wow. What an arsehole. I was just saying
hello.”

“
And then you
told me to call you in front of my pregnant wife.” Wait…
what?

She looks at me, her brows
raised, “You his pregnant wife?”

I open my mouth to respond but
Nathan cuts me off, “Stop talking to her.”

“
I’ll talk to
whoever I choose, just because we fucked doesn’t mean you hold any
kind of authority over me.”

Nathan closes his eyes briefly
and lets out a breath.

I hold up a chicken wing in
front of Nathan, “Want some?”

“
In a
second,” his hand goes to my wrist and slowly lowers it back to the
table. “Are you finished?”

“
Definitely,”
Diane spits and turns on her heel. “You weren’t that good anyway.”
Then she looks at me. “Good luck having a life without
oral.”

Then she leaves and I can’t
hold it back. I laugh and laugh and laugh. I laugh harder than I
have in ages and for once, I don’t feel guilty about it. “A life
without oral huh?”

“
Shut up,” he
bites out.

“
I’m going to
have to divorce you for that reason alone,” I choke through my
laughter and slide down my seat a little.

He shakes his head but I see
his lips stretch into a smile. “It isn’t amusing in the
slightest.”

“
Oh, it
totally is,” I gasp and continue laughing. “Best lunch date
ever.”

“
I’m almost
certain I don’t like you anymore,” he adds but his body starts to
shake beside mine. “Stop laughing, it’s contagious.”

I finally calm, a smile still
on my face. “You’re adorable, Nathan.”

He rolls his eyes, “Just what
every man wants to hear. Eat your wings.”

“
Want
one?”

“
No thank
you,” he says after a moment’s deliberation. We eat silently, I
occasionally tempt him with the wings that I’ve been craving lately
as I eat my own food. So I’m shocked when he suddenly blurts,
“Besides, if she hated it that much why would she tell me to call
her?”

“
In front of
your pregnant wife,” I add and start laughing again.

He chuckles for a while before
sobering. “Well you could’ve been, that female has no manners.”

“
Who was
she?”

He shrugs and turns towards me,
“Just some girl I dated half a year ago.”

“
How many
dates?”

“
One,” he
admits. “I think.”

“
You’re
disgusting,” I giggle and finish off my last bite of
food.

“
No worse
than Caleb.” He immediately regrets his words, I see this but it
does nothing to ease the sharp pain that slices into my heart. His
face drops and his hands come to my face. “I’m sorry, I was just
kidding. I didn’t…”

“
It’s fine,”
I cut him off and lower my face so he doesn’t see the tears there.
“We should be able to talk about him. We can’t keep pretending like
he never existed.”

His eyes scan my face and his
tongue trails across his lower lip, “Dessert?”

“
I’ll pass,”
I respond and push my almost empty plate away. “I’m
stuffed.”

“
Me too.
Let’s go.”

I wait for him to slide out
before I join him, he holds out his hand and I immediately give him
my wrist.

Wait… “Who’s Tracey?”

“
Sorry?” He
looks at me, a confused expression on his face.

“
The Diane
person, she said Tracey told her you were here. Who’s
Tracey?”

He thinks on it for a moment,
his gloved fingers scratching at his neck.

I laugh a little again, “You
don’t know, do you?”

“
Nope.”

“
Your memory
is worse than mine.”

“
I only
remember people and things that I care to remember,” his eyes land
on me and I can’t help but feel like he’s trying to tell me
something with them. They glaze over as a memory comes to his mind.
I wonder what it is but I don’t ask, that’s something I won’t prod
for. His thoughts are his own. “Let’s go have that wander around
the city I promised you but never came through on.”

“
I’d like
that,” I smile softly at him.

chapter
fIFTEEN

“
I think my
friends: Tommy and, Sasha want to come and visit soon. During the
holidays, maybe,” I run my fingers over the teddy bears in Toy
World. “Would that be a problem?”

“
For the
day?”

“
For the day
and night,” I pick up a giraffe teddy and place it in the basket
that Nathan is carrying.