Bush League: New Adult Sports Romance (27 page)

Finn

Though I did my best to enjoy being celebrated as a songwriter, nothing bothered me more than when people misunderstood me. My writing wasn't entirely transparent and elementary but it completely baffled me when I heard the different meanings people took away from my songs. Hearing my soon-to-be stepmother proclaim that my clearly love songs were anything but, I just needed to set the record straight.

To her credit, Marybeth sat through an entire performance of “Lock Box” without interrupting or looking bored. She had plenty to do and still took the time to hear out my effort to show her how sensitive I could be. Allie looked completely aggravated and annoyed too but she stuck around and listened to the song that was so clearly about her. Marybeth was the only one who politely clapped when I was done, the others in the house already over the novelty of the rock star in residence.

“Well, that was beautiful, Finn,” Marybeth praised me after the performance. “I'm starting to see what you meant. It's very different without all of the loud instruments so I can actually hear your voice.”

I hope that she was able to see that I wasn't angling for a chance to perform at the wedding, just making an attempt to clear my name as a brainless dolt. The look on her face let me know she had questions.

“So...what's it about?” she asked.

“It's about...love,” I told her and heard a loud scoff from someone elsewhere in the house. “It's about the pain you feel when you lose someone you love.”

Marybeth practically melted right there and that really got under Allie's skin. She stepped forward defensively as though I had been trying to pull one over on her mother.

“In school I was taught about unreliable narrators,” she said to me. “Like in this instance, did the person singing the song 'lose' someone or did he just walk away and find something new?”

Nobody else in the room knew what Allie was getting at but the tension between the two of us could be felt by all. Everyone backed away to let us have it out, not knowing how deep the resentment was on both sides.

“Well, the guy in the song,” I tried to explain, “was pulled away. He had no control over it. The girl he's in love with was pulled away too. They both have careers, he wasn't the only one who left.”

“But he's the only one who promised he'd come back...”she retorted. If there had been a mic nearby, Allie would've just dropped it. The room was silent as I was left scrambling for a comeback that wasn't coming to me. Finally Marybeth came between us to help diffuse the tension that she didn't understand.

“Well Allie, I know you're a very good writer and all but Finn did write this song. We'll have to trust what he's telling us,” Marybeth gave her best attempt at a diplomatic solution. Only Allie and I were still fuming. “And I thought you two would be too old for this sibling rivalry stuff...”

Marybeth turned her attention to some papers on the table as I started Allie down. She broke first and started to storm off, completely done with any attempt I made at proving I wasn't a bad guy. I wasn't ready for her to have the last word so I followed her down the hall.

“Hey!” I called out after her, not caring who could hear me. “Hey!” I yelled again, this time getting her attention. Allie whipped around, ready to fight. It was actually terrifying and caused me to jump back a step.

“WHAT?” she shot at me. Now I was concerned about privacy so I got close to her and whisper-yelled my frustrations at her.

“What the hell happened last night?” My hand found her arm in an attempt to get her to stay. She pulled herself out of that hold almost immediately. The look she gave me was one of pity, as if she felt bad for me.

“You're really something else, Finn,” she said while shaking her head. “You can just go and do whatever you want and you expect me to just wait around for you. You're something else...”

There was nothing I could say, she had made up her mind about how things were and no matter what I tried to do to change things, she just kept getting mad. My brain cycled through a million different things I wanted to tell her to try and get her to see things my way but before I could say any one of them, the breeze of her door slamming swept across my face.

*****

Allie

I slammed the door to free myself of Finn and my mom, hoping to turn to my article as an escape. Re-reading the words I had already written caused a spark to ignite inside of me; not only did I feel these descriptions were accurate, I felt they were too kind. My fingers were soon on fire, pecking away at the keyboard with added vigor, happy to expose the fraud.

I'm gonna tear down the walls around your heart...

His singing entered into my head without permission. No matter how hard I tried, all I could hear was him singing those lyrics that felt immensely personal.

Don't look back now baby...

There's no way he could feel something so strong. I refused to believe he had the sensitivity required to feel something apart from himself so deeply. Despite my best efforts, I couldn't stop hearing him sing, couldn't help but let his lyrics touch me. As I felt my lip quiver and a long, hot tear fall down my cheek, I grew angry again that he had been able to make me feel this way. And now he was getting in the way of my career. Begrudgingly I opened a new document and hated myself for saving it as "SharkFin draft 2".

Front-man Finn Aikens saves the band from the reliable tropes that trap and ensnare most other hard rock acts. Instead his lyrics present themselves as poetry, dancing in between the thunderous rhythm section and sharp guitars. New layers present themselves upon each listen of SharkFin's music, all built upon a foundation of honesty and authenticity almost always discarded by their peers. SharkFin present a challenge for their listeners, a challenge with a reward greater and above the typical head nodding and fist pumping that are often used as a barometer of success. If this band is laying out a new blueprint for all of those that come after, we are in very good hands.

A large part of me hated myself for heaping such praise but if I was going to preach about honesty, I had to follow the rules as well.

When I felt someone watching me, I composed myself and prayed it wasn't Finn.

"You working?" my mother asked as she lingered in the door.

"I'm kind of stuck where I'm at." As soon as the words left my mouth I realized what a mistake that was; I had freed myself up for whatever errands she was going to ask me to run. She quickly proved that my assumption was correct.

"Great," she beamed, "I'm going over to the hotel with Finn. Think you can make a quick run for me?"

Mother needed her dress picked up from the tailor and brought to the house so she could try it on one last time before sending it to be cleaned and pressed. Though both parties had been married before, Mom still insisted on a white, flowing dress and it would have to be absolutely perfect.

Mother had a need for me and when I looked back to this wedding, I knew I needed to be able to say I was the pillar of support that I was supposed to be. She had found love, love without the damning strings attached to the one I had thought I had. It was my duty to be there for her and celebrate her accomplishment at believing a man when he said he loved her. Her joy in being able to say 'I love you' back without fear of being considered foolish. Her support got me through some very lean years, the least I could do was be present during the fattest of hers.

Dakota came bouncing into the room once mother was gone, the endless, incessant chatter soon filling my sanctuary. Once she made a mention of Vida, my scrunched up nose told her all she needed to know.

"Why do you hate her?" Dakota felt the need to grill me. It was then that I had to recall the lessons learned from that one acting class I took in college.
Just convince yourself that you're telling the truth.

"Pfft, I don't
hate
her."

"She thinks you do. You're always so snooty when she's around," Dakota insisted. My thinly veiled contempt wasn't as thinly veiled as I had intended, apparently.

The intern didn't stick around much longer to hear me stammer out a weak protest and once she was gone, I didn't linger around in a house full of enemies. This errand run could be a great excuse to clear my head, free of the awkward interactions I kept being forced to have. Keys in hand I got in the car to get far away from everyone for as long as I could.

*****

Finn

Marybeth hadn't really come to grips with who I was, she clearly wasn't the least bit fazed by how important I had become; she treated me just like a regular person. While I could appreciate someone being “real” with me, I didn't really have any interst in being treated like the help. My hands were a little too important to be helping set up for a wedding.

When Marybeth had asked me to drive her over to the hotel, I thought that she had just wanted the experience of riding on the back of a motorcycle. I had no idea that her real plan was to put me to work.

"You know, Marybeth, I usually hang out on stage as someone else takes care of this stuff. I'm not really that skilled at this kind of..."

My voice trailed off as I became aware that she wasn't even listening to what I was saying, just waiting for me to finish. Once I did receive a rather condescending smile, I was instantly reminded me of just who she had given birth to. I began to see a bunch of Allie in her mother and knew I didn't stand a chance in trying to argue sense into her.

"Well good, maybe you can learn a new skill then?" she asked before disappearing, leaving me to untangle miles of dusty cable. My father and soon-to-be stepmother had figured out where to cut corners to save money, even though there was no need to. By putting the kids to work, they'd have free labor that would knock quite a few dollars off the final bill, even if I was the one paying it.

A number of hotel staff did double takes when they saw one of the biggest celebrities in the world sitting on the floor, swearing at cables. I took to flashing desperate smiles, silently begging them to come rescue me from this work but each one kept their distance. I may be a very well known and loved musician but that just made me harder to approach. It was one of the first things I learned about this gig: it's insanely lonely. But I didn't care in terms of other people, there was only one particular person I needed by my side and she was nowhere to be found.

My secret hope was that Allie was also going to be sent here to help out and would have no choice but to work closely with me. Being forced into such close proximity might be exactly what we needed to get over the tension that kept popping up between us. After the wedding I was off on tour again and who knows when we'd have another opportunity to be together.

As I dug through the endless pile of cables, I kept an eye on the door hoping she'd walk through. My heart began to race when I saw a feminine figure in the doorway, the sun behind only allowing me to see a silhouette. My excitement couldn't be contained, overjoyed that she had finally come.

"Hey Finn," the voice that definitely wasn't Allie's called out. It was Dakota who caused my spirits to fall. “Marybeth asked me to come down and help out.”

"Hey," I muttered while trying to hide my disappointment. When she asked what I was doing I explained in detail, trying to make it sound interesting. When she didn't leave my side, I gave her her own batch of cables to untangle. She took to it quickly, eager to impress. Unfortunately for her, she had just proven that I didn't need to be there.

"Hey I'll be right back," I told her, wandering towards the door quickly before she realized that she had been tricked. I couldn't just sit around all day and hope to see Allie, I needed to go find her.

*****

Allie

The tailor handed me Mom's dress in a huff, as though I was the one responsible for the million little fixes my mother had put her through. If this time it fit, her job was done and it would go get cleaned and ready. If it didn't fit, she was aware she'd have to continue dealing with my mom.

It wasn't lost on me that I should be enjoying this jaunt away. The open road in front of me and no one in my ear, just what I needed. To be safe I put on talk radio, unwilling to risk hearing the song that had been haunting me, the voice that wouldn't leave my head.

Just get through the wedding and everything goes back to normal.

The life I had so carefully made for myself, the one where I kept myself carefully protected, I could return to once the wedding was over. Once I got to leave all this, I'd never have to see him again, he couldn't hurt me any more.

Of course I took the scenic route back to the house, milking as much of this alone time as I could. Just as I was imagining the kind of guy I should be seeking out, a car rolled up to the stoplight I was waiting at. Through the window I saw a boy about my age; cute, clean-cut. We made eye contact and both laughed with some embarrassment at being caught looking. My immediate assessment of him was that he was well put together, organized, safe. His car was nice, not flashy but practical. This was probably the kind of guy who had a normal job, made good money, had a plan for his future: the exact type of guy I should be going after. Sure, he probably didn't know how to play guitar or drive a motorcycle. He probably didn't have tattoos and most likely had never been in a fight. But he also probably wasn't the type of guy to say 'I love you' just to get some action.

The light had cycled through green but neither of us had moved. My traffic buddy surprised me by rolling down his window, clearly waiting for me to do the same. When I did, we traded shy smiles, each waiting for the other to say 'hello'. Just as I was about to, just when my lips began to part to speak and say 'Hi', the most obnoxious sound came from this guy's car. The dopey grin on his face told me he had no idea how stupid it made him look to be listening to
that
song. Without giving him any time to even figure it out, I sped off, right through the red light, leaving him in my dust.

Happiness spread over my whole body when I realized that the house was empty for the first time in a long time. No intern, no floozy songwriter, no
him
. Growing up in this house, there were plenty of opportunities to be alone only I hadn't been able to appreciate until I was older and had people I needed to hide from.

As soon as I rested Mom's dress on her bed, a devilish idea sparked in my brain; the two of us were roughly the same size and had actually swapped clothes a number of times before. I started to wonder what I would look like in her dress. While I had no prospects or even designs on getting married ever, there was still a desire to see myself wrapped up in that gown, presented as the queen of the night. The desire and curiosity burned in my head, nagging and refusing to quiet down until I finally convinced myself that it would be ok to try on the dress really quickly.

My clothes flew off and the dress pulled over in record time. I was right, not only did it fit very well, it felt even better. The person looking back at me in the mirror looked beautiful and happy. It was enough to almost make me cry right then.

"You here?" Dakota's shrill voice suddenly brought me crashing back to reality. My body snapped to, trying desperately to cover up what I had been up to before she came up here.

"Wow," a deep voice abruptly spoke from behind me. "You look amazing," Finn said once I turned and found him standing in the doorway, watching me.

*****