Can't Let Go (5 page)

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Authors: A. P. Jensen

Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #Romance, #Contemporary

BOOK: Can't Let Go
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“What about her?”
Grace snapped.

“Why not ask her to take care of your niece? She doesn’t work the hours that you do.”

He was practically daring her to admit that her mom wasn’t suitable to be around children. The last was a very deliberate dig that made her hand clench into a fist. No matter how much she despised the choices her mom made in life she refused to discuss them with a man who grew up in luxury. How could she explain to someone as successful and driven as Mitchell about her mom who blackmailed the only man she had ever loved? Grace knew it would change Mitchell’s perception of her and she was right. In society background was everything. It was why Grace never discussed her family with Mitchell in the two years they were together. Little had she known that Ray beat her to it.

“It’s better that I take custody,” Grace said diplomatically.

“You can’t even admit to yourself what she is,” he said scornfully.

Her hand fisted. “My family is no concern of yours.”

“Is that why you never brought them up? Because they’re not my concern? How long were you going to hide the fact that you were putting regular deposits into a bank account you never told me about?”

She stiffened. “You checked my bank statements?”

“I didn’t understand why your bank account never got bigger no matter how much profit you made. You also didn’t come home at least once or twice a week whenever I was away on business. I had to know.”

She didn’
t respond. Objectively, she knew her actions were shady but there was nothing to say now. It didn’t matter. She stared out of the window instead of getting into an argument she knew she wouldn’t win.


Stop ignoring me,” he snapped. “Doing your best impression of the ice queen isn’t going to run me off. I can take whatever you dish out. I know you’re holding everything in. You’ve been more of a mom than a sister to Casey.”

His words sent a crack through the façade she was holding onto by sheer willpower. She sucked in a breath. “Don’t say her name.” She couldn’t hear her name without wanting to let
beat her fists against the walls of the plane.


If you need to cry, cry. If you need to yell at me, go ahead but you aren’t doing this alone no matter how much you think you don’t need me. Whatever you need, ask and it’s yours.”

She
couldn’t stay still. Being this close to him with no one around to distract them from each other was making her crazy. She drank her ginger ale and paced up and down the aisle. She bit her lip, thinking about taking custody of Evie. Doubt plagued her. Grace paused in her march up and down the aisle and placed a call to her mom. Vicky didn’t answer so she left a voicemail, asking her to call as soon as possible. She hadn’t talked to her mom for a year and from what little Casey said, their mom was getting deeper into drugs and alcohol but even Vicky deserved to know her daughter passed. She thumbed through her contacts, trying to think of more things she had to do to pass the time.

Mitchell
got tired of watching Grace pace and got up and pushed her down into the seat beside him. When she tried to get up he twined their hands together and anchored her in the seat. When she looked up to tell him off, the words died on her tongue.


Just sit,” he said.

His hand was warm, his grip confident
and sure when she felt so lost and frantic. She broke eye contact and let out a long shaky breath. He was just holding her hand. She could handle that. Only a few more hours and then she could get away from him.

“I need to get to
Evie,” she said to remind herself why she was putting herself through this hell.


She’s seven months old now, right?”

She shot him a surprised glance and he shrugged.

“I tracked Casey’s pregnancy.”

She shook her head. “You are unbelievable.”

“So you’ve said before.”

She hadn’t meant it in this conte
xt. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes because she was starting to feel sick from the stress.

“How did it happen?” he asked.

She swallowed. “Drunk driver. She was pulling out of her driveway and he slammed right into her door.”

He didn’t ask any more questions.
For a long while they sat staring straight ahead, hands clasped. A part of her wanted to jerk her hand away but the other part that was terrified wouldn’t let her. Mitchell worked on his laptop and made phone calls. It was comforting, a familiar rhythm she realized she missed. She listened to him switch languages and make notes on a legal pad as he worked. It lulled her into an uneasy doze.

Chapter Four

 

When they landed
in Texas, rain pelted down from the sky. Mitchell had a car waiting. She was vibrating with tension as Mitchell gave the driver the name of the hospital. She could feel her heart beat speed up. She needed to see for herself that Evie was fine. She was trying so hard to keep her emotions contained that she felt close to splintering apart by the time they walked into the hospital. Mitchell’s authoritative presence got them immediate directions to the nursery where Evie was being held. Grace heard Evie’s cries as soon as she entered the hallway and began to run.

Grace
pushed open the door to the nursery and saw Evie screaming in a nurse’s arms. The nurse murmured to Evie soothingly but nothing calmed the baby. Grace moved forward and as soon as Evie saw her aunt she lunged away from the nurse who was holding her. The nurse stared at Grace for a long moment before looking beyond her to Mitchell who filled the doorway. Her eyes bugged in recognition and Grace hoped the nurse wasn’t about to sell this story to the tabloids. It would make her life so much more difficult.

Grace enfolded
Evie in her arms, rocking her from side to side. This was all she had left of Casey. Evie shuddered against her, winding down from her sobs and occasionally letting out a hiccup. The nurse pulled herself together and tried to update Grace on Evie’s health but she was too busy hugging Evie’s tiny body as close as she could get. Evie survived the car accident without a scratch. Mitchell stepped in to confer with the nurse to give Grace time. Evie dug her hands into Grace’s sweater as if afraid she would disappear.

“Grace?” Mitchell said and she turned reluctantly.

Mitchell was struck dumb when the baby turned her head away from Grace’s chest and looked at him. She was identical to Grace. Same skin, hair and haunting jade eyes. He felt as if he’d been punched in the stomach. Evie could have been theirs. The thought blasted through him and he tried to swallow the lump in his throat. Grace held the baby protectively as silent tears poured down her face. Grace was emotionally stripped and all the emotion she hid from him was showing. Her face was a mask of such love and grief he had to look away.

“The nurse says she needs to eat
. She hasn’t since the accident,” he said gruffly.

He
had to sit down. Why hadn’t he thought to ask for pictures of Casey’s daughter? Why hadn’t Grace told him her niece was a replica of herself? He couldn’t drag his eyes from Evie who rubbed her face against Grace and relaxed slightly. It was obvious to everyone in the room that the baby and adult had an established bond.

The nurse handed
Grace a bottle. Grace sat in a rocking chair and with one hand clenched in her shirt Evie accepted the bottle, staring up at Grace the whole time. Her eyelashes were spiked with tears and Grace felt her heart breaking all over again. She felt Mitchell’s gaze. Was he thinking the same thing she had when she saw Evie? It was ironic that her niece was a mirror image of her when she and Casey were only half-sisters. 

Mitchell couldn’t watch
Grace and Evie staring at each other. The air vibrated around them. Seeing the baby caused emotion to bubble up inside of him, unwanted and irrepressible. He began to pace. He usually repressed the urge but he found he couldn’t stop. He heard the soft coo from the baby and Grace reassuring Evie that she wasn’t going anywhere and that she was safe. He paused beside Grace.

“She looks just like you
.” Evie was so tiny. Was she going to be petite like Grace or tall like Casey?

“I know,”
Grace said, brushing damp strands of red hair from Evie’s face. “I’m scared she’s gonna be like me.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

Grace didn’t answer. She rocked Evie and the baby was so exhausted she fell asleep with the bottle in her mouth. A nurse approached and Mitchell looked to Grace for permission. She was chalk white with exhaustion and shock.

“You want me to handle the details?”

“Please,” she whispered without looking up.

Grace
couldn’t take her eyes off Evie, couldn’t bring herself to be parted from her. She was completely responsible for Evie and for the first time in her life she had absolutely no idea what to do next.

 

 

“I have to
arrange a funeral for Casey,” Grace said numbly, watching Evie crawl across the lavish carpet.

“If
you want, I can handle the details,” Mitchell offered, watching Evie pick up a TV remote and gurgle in manic delight.

“I should do it,” Grace said.

She took the TV remote from Evie so she wouldn’t brain herself with it. She was so tired. She swayed where she sat. It was a whirlwind of paperwork, statements and calming Evie every time Grace moved a foot away from her. Mitchell was by her side, answer questions, pointing out where to sign and ushering her in the right direction. It was almost ten in the morning before Mitchell called a halt to everything and took her to a nearby hotel. A part of her knew she needed to deal with the house she bought for Casey but she didn’t protest.

Now
that they were away from the gaggle of doctors and nurses and the sense of urgency they carried, Evie was reverting back to her normal self. She was curious, independent and confident. Evie stood, using a square glass table as leverage. She pounded the table with her chubby fists and Grace rushed forward before Evie hit her face on the sharp edge.

“Casey told me she was
beginning to stand on her own. This is the first time I’ve seen it,” Grace said as she carried Evie back to the middle of the room.

“This place isn’t very baby proof, is it?” Mitchell said, looking around the presidential suite with a new set
of eyes. He watched Evie turn the simplest things into weapons.

“No,” Grace said wearily, letting
Evie balance against her.

“Someone’s getting her clo
thes and toys together from Casey’s place,” Mitchell said as someone knocked on the door.

Mitchell got up and
let in a hotel worker who dragged in a play pen, crib, changing table and diapers.

“T
he girls at the front desk recommended this stuff for Evie.”

A wan smile curved
Grace’s mouth. The thought of Mitchell asking for advice about baby “stuff” was funny.

“Thanks.”

“Do you want to take a shower or just go to bed?” Mitchell asked, watching warily as Evie crawled towards him.

“I don’t know,” Grace said, rubbing her aching head.

She felt sick, heartbroken and on the verge of collapse. She saw the way Mitchell looked at Evie like a ticking bomb. If she wasn’t so exhausted, she would have laughed.


Do you want to shower?” Mitchell persisted and stiffened when Evie slapped his shiny shoes and tugged on his slacks.

Grace rose to grab
Evie but stopped when Mitchell held up a hand, never taking his eyes off the child. “She’s fine. I can handle her for a few minutes if you want to take a shower.”


I can take her,” Grace insisted and came forward and stopped again when Mitchell glared at her.

“I can take care of her. You aren’t going to be any good to her if you’re dead on your feet.”

She hesitated. Taking a shower sounded like heaven but she wasn’t sure about leaving Evie with Mitchell. She knew Mitchell wouldn’t hurt her but she had no idea what experience he had with kids. As far as she knew he had as much experience as she had before Casey had Evie- none.

“You don’t like kids,” she began.

“I never said I don’t like kids.”

Evie
stood and sidestepped away from Mitchell, using the couch for balance. He hesitated before he reached out and gently grasped the baby’s arm. He froze, waiting for her to scream but Evie grinned up at him, showing two bottom teeth. He guided her gently back to him and let her lean against his knees. She let out a shrill scream of delight that startled the hell out of him. He blinked. How could such a small person make such noise?

“But you said-”

“Now’s not the time to get into that. I don’t hate kids and I can watch her. The sooner you get into the shower, the sooner you can go to sleep.”

“I’ll hurry.
She just had a bottle and I changed her diaper. She should be fine but just call out if you need me.”

Grace took
several steps away and paused. Evie didn’t notice Grace’s silent retreat. She was too distracted by the male looking down at her with wary, dark eyes. Grace took a shower in record time and pulled on a pajama set with shorts and a top. She glanced at her appearance in the mirror and shrugged. Who knew when she packed her suitcase she would end up in a hotel room with Mitchell? Not her. When she rushed back into the living area she stopped in the doorway, dumbstruck by the bizarre scene.

Mitchell had gone from sitting on the couch to the floor.
Evie chattered up at him as she tugged on his tie with one hand and played with his expensive cell phone in the other. Mitchell should have looked out of place and uncomfortable but his usually hard mouth was curved. He wasn’t irritated in the least by Evie wrinkling his clothes or the slobber on his phone. He looked enchanted by her. Grace knew the feeling. It was how she felt the first time Casey handed Evie over in her hospital room after giving birth. Seeing him this way tugged at her heart. If he didn’t mind kids why had he-? She didn’t finish the thought. That was in the past.

Mitchell looked up
, saw her watching them and cleared his throat uncomfortably before disentangling himself from Evie who clawed up his muscular legs. She leaned against him, waving his phone as she shouted gibberish up at him. Mitchell focused on Grace and his gaze zeroed in on her arm. Before she could move Mitchell had Evie on his hip and was right in front of her. He reached out and grasped her elbow, gently turning her arm so he could see the fading bruises on her upper arm.

“What the hell happened?” he demanded.

She yanked away and tried to tug her short sleeve down. “Nothing.” What would he say if she told him his godfather had done it? Call her a liar, most likely. It was what he said before…

“Nothing?” he said, voice rising. “I can tell enough from the bruising that someone wrapped
their hand around your arm. Was it Landon?”

She gaped at him. “
Landon?”

“Did he try
to-”


Landon thought you did this to me and he was just as pissed as you are now,” Grace informed him crisply.

Mitchell’s face paled in disgust. “I wouldn’t hurt you!”

“Neither would he,” she said firmly, crossing her arms.

“Then who-”

“I wasn’t watching where I was going. I’m a klutz,” she said without putting any conviction behind the statement. She was so damn tired and she felt herself swaying on the spot from exhaustion. She reached out for Evie.

“Tell me who did it.”

She looked up at him, eyes filled with tears as reaction set in. Casey was dead and she was sharing a hotel room with a man who’d diced her into tiny pieces. Evie fussed in Mitchell’s arms, distracting them both.

“Just give her to me,” she whispered.

For a moment she thought he was going to object but when Evie let out a cry he handed her over hastily.

“Our
suites connect. If you need anything, call out,” he said.

She handed back
his phone slobbery phone and walked into the connecting suite. Grace settled Evie in the crib beside the bed and leaned over to watch her niece investigate her new environment. She slapped her hands on the wooden bars and then collapsed on a stuffed teddy bear someone thoughtfully added. Evie rubbed her eyes, yawned and fell asleep with her butt in the air. Tears blurred Grace’s eyes as she watched her niece breathe in and out.

Tears trickled down her cheeks. Casey was gone and she now had custody
of her seven month old niece. What did she have to do to fit Evie into her life? How would Casey feel about Grace raising Evie in New York? They both agreed raising her outside of the city would be best and now… Her head throbbed.

Mitchell checked in on Grace before he headed to bed and found
Evie standing up in the crib, watching him. He stopped in the doorway and tried to figure out what to do. Evie’s face began to change and she let out a strangled cry. He leapt into action and scooped her up from the crib while Grace murmured in her sleep but didn’t wake. Evie smiled at him, all angst gone now that she was being held. He went into the living room and set her on the floor. She was off like a shot, heading for anything she could brace herself against to stand. Keeping her distracted when he had to pry her away from something was a challenge, especially when her new toys were statues, paperweights and candy wrapped in bright paper.

“How long has she been up?” Grace asked
in the doorway, yawning.

Mitchell
limped in relief. “An hour.”

“Let me make her a bottle,” Grace said and came out a minute later shaking a bottle.
Evie crawled to her and Grace put her back in the crib where Evie held her bottle as she drank.

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