Confidential (32 page)

After a solid two hours of studying, I peered at my phone and grumbled to myself, watching it vibrate against my desk. I picked it up and answered, "Hello?"

"Hey baby," I heard Ian's cocky grin come through the phone.

I refrained from rolling my eyes, even though he couldn't see, "What's up?"

"You still up for dinner tonight?" He asked.

"Sure." An awkward silence ensued, where I waited for him to say something interesting or intelligent, but of course, nothing came. "What time?" I offered a bit to keep the conversation going.

"Uh… I'll pick you up in a half hour?"

"Okay." I began looking over more of my notes, thinking about how to convince my mom to let to boys come with me to California.

"Sweet." He chuckled, "Make sure you wear something that makes you look good."

I pulled the phone away from my ear and looked at in disbelief. "Right." I told him, before hanging up. A year ago, Ian would have been completely perfect. I would have loved to have an older boyfriend. That guy that was tall and muscular, good looking, and relatively easy to hang around. But now, to me he was just agitating. Wear something that makes me look good? What does that even mean? I suppose, he's kind of funny, except he's only funny when he's making fun of someone else. It's totally unnecessary, and his shallowness was getting on my nerves. He was one of those people I only wanted to see in small doses.

Ian came up to my door and knocked on it, like a gentleman, but in vain, because my mom was out looking for new cabinets for our kitchen and my dad was at work. I opened the door and forced a wide smile on my face, looping my arm in his, to go off to dinner. I wore I simple short jean skirt and tank top, showing off my arms and legs. I was comfortable, it was best to wear less clothing, it had begun to be too hot out.

We sat across from each other in a cute
diner
, frequented by many people of our school, and Ian talked about going to college the whole time. All I ever thought about whenever Ian talked is how Camdon would never say that, Camdon would never act like that, or do that, or be that way. Camdon and I had conversations, you know, those lovely things involving two people. Ian was basically talking to himself. I just nodded my head and laughed sometimes, said 'totally' or 'yeah', and we were good. It was hard though, Ian didn't seem to distract me from thoughts about Camdon, he only seemed to make them worse.

When the night ended he pulled into the empty drive way of my house, and leaned over and gave me a kiss. Kissing Ian was almost difficult. I normally just let my body take over when I kissed, but I had to consciously think about what to do, because everything about it seemed so wrong. Those weren't the lips I should be kissing, those aren't the eyes I should see, or the hair I should feel. I often wondered how Camdon found it so easy to kiss Kelly. Those were the things I thought about, while Ian assaulted me with his tongue.

After several minutes, I pushed him away, "I better go." I gave him another quick kiss and slide out of the car, walking back to my house, my mood now somber.

*  *  *

I pulled out my phone and checked the time once again, and tapped my foot impatiently. "Moooooom!" I yelled up the stairs. "My flight leaves in an hour, and my cab is here. I'm leaving!"

"Okay honey!" She called back; "Have fun!"

I dragged my rolling suitcase out of my house as the cab pulled up the driveway. I threw my suitcase into the trunk, and told the cab driver where I wanted to go, and before I knew it we were on our way.

School couldn't have ended fast enough, and I was going to Mission Beach for a week to stay in a condo my parents had rented. Originally, it was going to be a family trip, but my dad got caught up in
a
huge deal and my mom wanted to stay back a few days to finish the plans for remodeling the downstairs. So she was going to fly up Thursday, while Dylan and Marcus were coming up for Friday and Saturday. Sucks for them, they still have
a
month of school.

I was more than excited to see my best friends, and even more excited to get away from pesky Ian, and my giggly school friends who did nothing but tan all day. I just wanted a couple of days to mope by myself, I haven't been able to in a while, finals kept me too busy. I wanted to drink all the alcohol in the condo, and imagine Camdon's lips on mine, without being bothered about pretending to be happy.

So San Diego, with its gorgeous sunshine and dirty streets, was calling my name. It would be my safe haven for a whole week. And I had four whole days to myself, to do whatever I pleased.

The condo was gorgeous-small, but gorgeous. It was
a
five minute walk from the board walk, and had three rooms, a kitchen, and a living room. There was Smirnoff, Captain Morgan, and Jack Daniels as well, until Marcus and Dylan came here, these would be my new roommates. I smiled appreciatively as I walked through the door, I could see myself having a very, very nice vacation.

My phone started ringing, and I pulled it out and sighed as I saw the caller id. "What?" I asked annoyingly into the phone.

"Hey baby." Ian's voice cooed.

I rolled my eyes, "Please don't hey baby me. I told you we ended. Officially. As in, now I don't want to hear from you."

Ian had given me the perfect opportunity to break up with him. He cheated on me, with some girl he met at his ASU orientation. I didn't really care, but it was a credible enough excuse to break up, and it gave my friends more drama to dwell on.

He sighed, "Can't we still hang out? We can still be friends…" I could almost here the "with benefits" at the end of his sentence.

"No." I said curtly. "I don't really want to talk to you. You're kind of annoying." I snapped my phone shut and turned it on silent. No more pesky messages from that boy.

I grabbed myself a coke and some jack, making myself a mixed drink and taking delectable sips before slipping into a swim suit and pulling on some shorts. Stepping out of the apartment I closed the door gently, and began walking towards the beach.

The beach has always held my heart. It's so beautiful, and the sound of the waves are so peaceful at night, and walking down the crowded area at dusk was pleasantly refreshing. It was relaxing, not having to do anything or keep up any appearances.

I walked barefoot, my toes spreading out in the cool sand. I started humming to myself and walked mindlessly across the beach, until my moment was interrupted by being hit in the head with a frisby.

This is one of the only faults I have with the beach. On perfectly nice days it's so crowded, with people rollerblading and skateboarding on the boardwalk, while others have pick up volleyball and soccer games in the sand. Balls are everywhere, frisbies are everywhere, and its embarrassing, getting hit in the face by one. And it hurts.

"Ow." I said, rubbing my head and pouting. I was careful not to spill my drink, or get sand in it. I took a sip, to make sure it wasn't so full that it would spill over the edge when I bent down to pick up the frisby.

"Sorry!" I deep voice shouted from afar. I couldn't help but glare at the five figures running my way. They interrupted my moment of peace: I couldn't help but be bitter.

They were all in their late twenties or early thirties, and all relatively attractive. Three boys and two girls. One girl was beautiful, curvy and cute in her small bikini, the other was rail thin, but stood a little too pompously for me. The guys had nice bodies, and I tried not to stare as I could feel the alcohol starting to set in. I forgot how good looking people in California where, or maybe it was just because they were barely wearing clothes.

So I was getting a little tipsy. Sue me.

"Here, I'll take that," One of the guys came up to me and took the frisby, he was decent looking, I noted, but nothing to special. "Yo! Tom! Maybe you should learn how to throw next time."

I didn't open my mouth, just stared curiously at the Tom figure. The one who was speaking turned to me again and smiled. "So what's a pretty little thing like you doing out and about?"

I raised an eyebrow at him, trying to get him to stop staring at my chest. "Just out on a walk," I answered lightly, continuing to stare at the Tom character. He was average height, maybe six
foot
, muscular, with blonde hair trimmed short.

"Like what you see?" He opened up his arms, making the whole group laugh.

"You look really familiar…" I squinted at him, trying to place where I recognized him from.

"What's in your drink there little darlin'?" The third one asked, taking a whiff. "Damnnnnn girlie. Someone's been boozing tonight."

"How old are you?" Tom asked, laughing.

I just shrugged at them, "Go back to playing frisbey," I turned and walked away, back to the condo, ignoring their calls and whistles.

That night I had strange dreams of Camdon, with his arms out wide, saying "Don't you miss me?" In the same voice that Tom had joked with his friends. I restlessly turned back and forth.

That morning I went running on the beach, enjoying the quiet serenity of the early morning, and after I began exploring shops. By ten my stomach began to interrupt my beach dress fetish, and I switched to looking for good restaurants. Did I want the greasy, amazing hamburgers and french-fries off the boardwalk? Or did I want one of those cute little
diner
places off the side of the road?

I passed by a fancy looking place, right on the beach, with its deck open, and people in dress attire dining and chatting with one another. I stopped, and looked ahead as I saw Tom leaving the restaurant. I watched him walk towards me, in khaki pants and a nice oxford shirt, with his sleeves rolled up. He was holding a business folder in one hand, and talking on the phone with the other, and flashed a smile that revealed a dimple. His face was boyish, looking misplaced with such a professionally dressed body, he laughed on the phone, saying something I couldn't quite here. As he passed by my still form, without even noticing me, I heard him say, "Yeah, I'll be at the bonfire, tonight right? At six? Cool, cool. Yeah, right where were tomorrow. Alright, I'll see you later."

I froze, maybe it was out of boredom, although I hadn't even been in San Diego for more than a day, but his words haunted me. It was all I could think about, I obsessed over why I was obsessing with this guy. His voice was slightly familiar, his smile too. At first, I thought he may have worked with my father at some point. He was obviously a well to do business guy; that sounded like the type that started out with my dad. But it didn't quite fit. He was practically still a frat boy. I was too intrigued not to make my way down at the beach around six fifteen. It was still light out, the sun shinning pink in the sky. I made my way over towards a group of guys, before stopping and watching Tom walk my way. He was obviously not a very observant guy, because this was the second time today I had gone unnoticed. I wasn't even thinking, in fact, I must have been possessed, because one minute I was watching him walk passed me, and the next, I had stepped in front of him, blocking his way. He knocked me down of course, not quite ready for me to suddenly be in his way.

"Are you okay? Sorry, I didn't see you there." He bent down to help me up, and when I looked up at his face I almost fainted.

My sharp intake of breath had startled him much more than his presence surprised me. Those eyes. Those beautiful blue eyes. I'd know those eyes anywhere. "How old are you?" I blurted out, my voice demanding.

"Uh…" He chuckled, a little taken aback, "33, I turn 34 next month." He gave me a strange look.