Denial (22 page)

“I know.”

“Do you really? Even after last night?”

“Especially after last night.” I gather up our empty plates and take them to the sink. He follows me. “You ended up in worse shape than I did.”

“I don’t want you to worry about me losing it when we do this. That won’t happen. It’s not even a remote possibility.”

“Because you’re not into it, right?”

“Yes.” Will that make it harder or easier for me? “Come over here,” he beckons from across the room.

Head down, eyes glued shamefully to the floor, I amble towards him. Isaac wraps his arms around me, pulling me tightly against his body. For once, it doesn’t turn me on, but I do start to
relax. My eyes stay squeezed shut as his hands guide my face upwards. His lips press into my forehead and make their away around my face in gentle kisses. Soon they’re traveling down my neck as his hand soothes my hair and I wrap my arms around his shoulders.

He breaks away after a moment, looking up at the ceiling with his face in his hands breathing deeply. The posture he takes when he’s composing himself, the one I’ll probably be seeing a lot more often now. When he looks at me, I see the mask he’s wearing is barely attached. “Remember those seven strikes you racked up today?”

“It was six.”

He chuckles. “If I wasn’t going e
asy on you, each of those offenses would have been worth five to ten, so it could be closer to sixty.”

My eye widen. “Shit, sir.”

The smile that crosses his face is clearly involuntary. “Maya, Maya, Maya. It’s definitely seven now. And considering what you just told me, we should probably go higher, don’t you think?”

My lip quivers and I nod. “You said there were tricks. I think I’m going to need them.”

“Yeah, you will, but you’re aren’t going to like it.”

“So the role playing thing won’t cut it, huh?”

“Not on its own. It might help or it might make it worse. You’ll have to figure that out internally.” He holds out his hand and I take it gladly. His grip is firm. “Come on. I need to show you something. Then we’ll get started.”

My heart drums in my ears as the scary sex master opens the door to the scary sex chamber. There is a lot of freaky shit in here. Some of it looks fun.

1
8

Isaac is guiding me to one of the less horrifying pieces to be tied too, but I still break into a sweat because obviously that’s the one for me tonight. It’s just a set of metal bars that actually looks rather homemade or like something you’d see in a gymnastics studio. There’s a hook hanging down attached to an adjustable chain. The metal is cool beneath my fingers as I grip the side and shake it back and forth, testing the stability. It’s quite sturdy.

“So, based on your reaction last time, I made a few modifications.”

“Thanks.” He positions me so that I’m standing beneath the hook, doing his best to keep his eyes from meeting mine.

“Spread your feet, well beyond shoulder width.” At least I’m sure that I can do this now, because that really turned me on. “Good. Now put your hands together and raise them up over your head.” I hold that position as he adjusts the chain to the proper length. “Don’t move.”

He’s over at a chest of drawers containing God knows what kind of torture implements. I’m thankful when he turns around, only holding a pair of lined handcuffs. They gleam in the soft light as he walks back to me, his eyes failing to meet my gaze.

“I’m going to put these on you, alright?”

I nod, inhaling his scent as he reaches up and tethers my wrists together. The hook catches the space between the cuffs and I feel myself pull upwards as he retracts the chain.

“Spread your legs a little further until it feels like you’re hanging.” This actually feels pretty good. Vulnerable and pleasurable at the same time, but being fully clothed and able to see might have something to do with it. “Does this position hurt at all?”

“No.”

“Strike eight, Maya,” he says firmly. “Try again.”

“No, Sir.”

“Good.” The chain sends vibrations through my body as he tests it. “Now put your legs together all the way and pull your hands forward.” I do, and I’m free. I look up at him, but he doesn’t look back as he takes the cuffs off. “Even though you feel like you’re restrained, you can free yourself at any time. Do you think that will help lessen the anxiety?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“I’m glad. That was the point.”

“So what’s going to happen to me while I’m hanging there?”

“I’m going to introduce you to the practice of orgasm denial.”

That doesn’t sound enjoyable. “Will it hurt?”

“Not really. That’s not the point. But you can get so horny that you’re very uncomfortable. Which
is
the point.”

“Why are we doing this?”

“Well, that’s the trick. I was going to spank you then reward you every night, but that won’t work now.”

“Why not?” That plan sounds like more fun.

“It’s a form a mental conditioning. When your body is very aroused, it tends to stay aroused even if something is happening that you don’t like. It works even better if you like it a little bit.”

“So, we’re going to trick my brain?”

“Basically. The only time you’ll orgasm is when you’re uncomfortable, and eventually your mind should link the two things together, enhancing your response to the stimuli.”

“How long will it take?”

“I have no idea. It depends on the person. And how much you started out liking it. So if you’re lying about this…”

“I’m not.” He sighs. “Sir.”

“I’ll do this for a few days before we really get into it. I’m thinking five or so.”

“Will you fuck me?”

“No. Neutered, remember?”

“Oh yeah. But normally, would you?”

“Occasionally. With you, I’d definitely want to, but I’d probably make you come so I couldn’t.”

“What happens after I’m all hot and bothered?”

“Nothing. You’ll beg me and I won’t give in. Then we’ll move to the bench and I’ll spank you. Pretty hard, but just with my hand for tonight. I’m also going to start your anal training, if you don’t have any objections. It’s fitting.”

I was starting to get a little scared until he mentioned the anal thing, making me flash on last night. I can’t believe I’m going to be a butt girl. “I don’t think I do, but could you explain that a little more.”

“It’s just a butt plug. I’ll show it to you.” Isaac walks back over to the chest and comes back with a sealed plastic package. “Brand new. Just for you.”

“Thank you.”

“
Maya
.”

“Thank you, Sir,” I peep.

“These are graduated. We start with the smallest one.” He hands it to me to inspect. It’s silver and seamless. I’m guessing the flared base is to keep it from disappearing up my ass, thus preventing an awkward emergency room visit.

“Will I wear it all night?”

“No. Probably 20 to 30 minutes for the first session.”

“So do we move up to a larger one each time?” The last two are pretty intimidating. I don’t know.

“Maybe, maybe not. We’ll see how you respond.” My face flushes. I can’t tell if this is more awkward than arousing. “Let’s just get through tonight.”

“Are we going to do this right now?”

“Yes. Are you okay?”

“I think so.”

“What are you feeling? Do continue to be a vague as possible.”

“Nervous. The butt thing is a little exciting.” I glance up and see him grin. “But, I don’t know, this feels a little off. Like a business transaction. Too professional.” The smile drops.

“I know, but I’m not bending this time. If anything, it’s about to get worse.”

“Isaac…”

In a flash, his body violently crashes into mine and he grips my hair harshly. “You do not call me that in here,” he snarls into my ear. “Do you understand?” I nod. “You have no idea how fucking hard this is for me right now. With you.”

“I’m sorry.” I whelp as he pulls my head back roughly.

“I’m sorry, what?” he growls.

“Sir. I’m sorry, Sir.”

“That’s fucking right. Because that’s who I am in here. It’s about to get very, very dark and I know that you don’t think you can handle this, but you can.”

“Why does it have to be so different?”

“It just does. I… shut down inside when I do this, okay? And I’ve been feeling especially
alive
for the past 48 hours.”

He kisses that spot below my ear he discovered that makes me relax in his hands. His face
is nuzzling mine tenderly but his grasp is so brutal. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I like it. A ragged moan escapes my throat as he pulls my hair even tighter and slides his hand into my pants. It doesn’t stop, sinking lower until his fingers are spreading my lips and circling my clitoris. He positions himself behind me, groaning painfully as my rear makes contact with his erection.

“You like it rough. That’s why you’re here.” He nips my earlobe. “So do I. Look what we did to each other last night.” I’m aching to say his name, so I literally bite my tongue. “Good girl.” He heard me anyway and slides his teeth across my jawline. “But don’t bite your tongue. You could hurt yourself. And that’s my job from now on.”

“Yes, Sir,” I pant.

“Maybe you need a firm hand.” I gasp as he pinches my clit roughly. “I’ve been soft on you because I
really
like you, Maya. But that shit ends when we cross this threshold. Understand?”

“Yes, Sir.” He’s flicking my c
lit wildly. I squirm, obviously aggravating his injury as he makes a painful sound, so I force myself to stay still.

“And if you hear me… if I drop it for a minute, and I know that I will,” he croaks, his real voice quivering though, lost and despondent. “You will ignore it. Do not say my name and do not touch me. Please.”

“Yes, Sir.” Why does it feel like I’m making him do this? This is fucked up.

“And whatever you do, Maya.” His words are tearing at my heart as his trembling lips press into the space where my shoulder meets my neck. “Do not look at me. Under any circumstances. If I see your eyes, I am going to crumble. I won’t blindfold you,
Rookie, not this time. But you keep them on the floor or you keep them shut. I am fucking begging you.”

“We don’t have to do this.” I yelp when he pinches me again and jerks my head. “Sir.”

“Oh yes, we do,” he growls, dragging his tongue from my shoulder to my ear. “I will take you any fucking way I can get you. Even if it kills me.”

Me too.
I’m about to climax when he pushes me away. Holy shit that was intense and we’re just getting started.

“I’m going to go put on different pants and you’re going to go put on nothing except your real collar. You know how you should be when I get back in here.”

He’s out the door and I’m alone in this fucked up sex chamber. A loud thud comes from his room as I’m headed to mine, but I don’t dare ask if everything is okay. I strip out of my clothes and don my collar, pushing the conflicting emotions away as best I can. I’m not exactly sure who I’m doing this for at this point.

On my knees, hands on thighs, eyes down. I wait next to the door in the playroom. It takes a long time for Isaac to come back and as soon as I see his bare feet, I’m racked with guilt and filled with excitement at the same time.

The muscles on his abdomen flex deliciously as he kneels in front of me. His hand slides under my chin, lifting it up so I force my eyes shut. My breathing is ragged and heavy as his lips worship my face, kissing every little piece of skin except for my mouth. He pulls me into his lap and hugs me tightly. I think his body is apologizing for him because he can’t say it. It’s agony not to touch him.

He picks me up, giving me a legitimate reason to wrap my arms around his shoulders.
He groans mournfully and I wince. Eyes fluttering open but staying glued to the floor, I’m back on my feet watching him cuff my hands together. I let my head hang forward as he raises them. Isaac’s bare foot makes contact with mine, nudging my feet further apart so I spread them until I feel my weight pulling down on my wrists as my fingers toy with the cold steel chain.

Marred from my claws, his back is towards me as he walks toward the chest of drawers, every muscle twitching beneath his skin as he searches for whatever he’s looking for. I force my eyes lower as he spins around. They lock onto the vibrator he’s carrying.

The sound of his breathing enhances what he’s doing to my body. His hands are everywhere, gliding across my skin, kneading my flesh as his mouth explores my face. Hungry kisses travel down my throat as I squirm, skipping over my collar and landing on the hollow beneath my neck. He lets out a painful groan as he slides all of his fingers beneath my collar and grips it, closing the crucial space that makes wearing it comfortable. The pressure against my throat makes it hard to breathe and I start to panic until he pulls it forward, the clasp at the back digging into my vertebrae. Is he seriously going to rip it off? Do I want him too?