Distant Dreams (32 page)

“Don’t wanna go.” She wriggled against Carolina’s sturdy hold. “No! No! No! Don’t wanna go!”

Mary’s protest was ignored by Carolina. “I’m sure you don’t. But look, today is my birthday, and they are planning a special party for me. I don’t want the party, but it makes Mother happy. You want to make Mother happy, don’t you?”

Mary stopped wriggling and nodded solemnly.

“Very well, then you must go back to the nursery, and I must prepare for my party.”

After depositing Maryland in the nursery, Carolina went to her room. Hannah had already laid out her ball gown. It would be Hannah’s last real duty for her, and the thought made Carolina sad. Lightly fingering the material, she remembered a time when gowns and finery were far from her mind. Why, it seemed like only yesterday she was climbing trees and running on the stairs herself. Looking up, Carolina caught sight of a package on her dressing table. Curious to see who had sent it, she quickly forgot the gown and went to the gift.

The package was quite large and nearly covered the surface of the table. There was no note on top of the box, so Carolina decided there was no other choice but to open it. Inside was a single piece of paper.

Darling Daughter,

On this, your birthday, I pass to you a tradition begun by my
great-great-grandmother. For over five generations, mothers have gifted
their daughters with a sterling tea service on their sixteenth birthday. This
is to start you off well in a life of hostessing in your own right. I pray you
enjoy this gift as I have enjoyed mine. One day you will make a fine wife and
mother, and this tea service will forever remind you of your transformation
into womanhood.

Love, Mother

Carolina picked through the cotton batting to pull out the silver creamer. She held it up to catch the fading light from the bedroom window. It was lovely and ornately designed with intricate curlicues and vines on the handle. She thought of her mother picking it out for her and the hopes that must have crossed her mind.

“She probably already sees me married and moved away,” Carolina mused and returned the creamer to the box. She wanted to be happy about the gift; she truly did. But something inside rebelled at the very thought of its domesticating implications. Why couldn’t her mother be happy with planning Virginia’s life out? Why, she practically had Virginia and James engaged. But this thought only prompted more concern, because as soon as Virginia was safely married to James, Margaret Adams would no doubt turn her full attention to seeing Carolina married off as well.

Carolina wasn’t sure which bothered her more—the idea of James married to her sister or her mother’s manipulative plan to see her plunged into marital bliss.

Thankfully, she didn’t have time to ponder that question further. The guests were arriving for the lawn dinner, and she must go greet them.

“Hold still, now, while I secure this necklace,” Margaret said as Carolina nervously fidgeted. “There. I knew it would be perfect.”

Carolina had to admit her mother was right. Creamy pearls were the crowning touch to the elegantly draped neckline. The necklace was an unusual design with three sweeping strands of graduated pearls, offset in the center with a peach and ivory cameo. The cameo, a carving of her mother at the age of eighteen, was one of Margaret Adams’ prized possessions.

“It’s truly beautiful, Mother. Thank you for all you’ve done.” She leaned over to kiss her mother on the cheek.

So far, the day was progressing beautifully. Dinner had been enjoyable and the afternoon weather had been perfect for the outdoor event. Now it was time for the ball, and Carolina’s knotted stomach hinted that this would not be the relaxing affair dinner was. She would truly be on display now. Through the closed door, Carolina could hear the orchestra warming up and the sound made her shudder a little.

“I just hope everything goes well.” Carolina’s tone was a bit shrill with nerves.

“It will,” Margaret replied, giving her daughter a soothing pat. “I’ve seen to every detail. Which reminds me, I’d better go and see to it that the musicians are properly arranged. I’ll send your father to present you. You wait here until he arrives.”

Carolina nodded and waited until her mother was gone before motioning Miriam to help her.

“My hair seems loose on this side.”

Miriam inclined her head in agreement and went to work to ensure the coiffure remained stable. When she’d finished, Carolina went to stand before the cheval mirror. The transformation from regular everyday life to the fairy-tale princess in the mirror startled Carolina. This was her first glimpse at the full effect, and it left her nearly breathless.

The silk gown was completely draped and veiled with the peach tulle. The bodice was just low enough to separate it from the more childish designs Carolina was used to wearing, while revealing nothing more than creamy white shoulders and neck. Still, the draping gave an alluring hint of womanly fullness before narrowing sharply to a petite basque waist. The skirt, rich and full, seemed to glitter in the soft light when Carolina twirled in front of the mirror. For the first time she noticed that the tulle had a modest weave of golden thread amid the peachy blush. It was this that caught the light and gave the dress an enchanting glow.

Moving around the room as though she were waltzing, Carolina suddenly felt her heart soar with anticipation for the evening before her. She was to be the belle of the ball, and even Virginia wouldn’t dream of upstaging her little sister’s coming-out party.

Giggling nervously, Carolina checked her hair again and nodded approvingly. Parted in the middle, the ringlets were pulled back and pinned high to cascade down her back. Added to this, a peach-colored ribbon daintily trimmed her hair and disappeared into the curls. The style was all the rage and suited Carolina well. Going to the dressing table, Carolina pulled on Hannah’s mitts and smiled. Now, all she had to do was wait.

The waiting turned out to be more nerve-wracking than Carolina had imagined it would be. She couldn’t sit down—it would wrinkle the dress and ruin her debut. She couldn’t walk out in the halls because she hadn’t yet been presented for the evening, which was the
formal
presentation and much more important than the earlier festivities. So, confined to her bedroom and now without even Miriam to talk with, Carolina silently wished for the time to pass more quickly.

Music drifted down from the third-floor ballroom, along with the animated sound of voices and laughter. Carolina knew that every family in the county would have turned out for this night, as well as many families from Washington City. It was to be a grand occasion, and it was even rumored that President Jackson himself would honor the family by attending. Carolina knew this would be to her mother’s absolute delight.

The knock at her door interrupted her thoughts and put an end to Carolina’s waiting. Opening it revealed her father’s smiling face.

“My, my, but you do this family proud, Carolina,” her father said and leaned down to kiss his daughter on the forehead.

“I’m very nervous, Papa,” she admitted. “This whole ordeal is both terrifying and exciting.”

He nodded with a knowing look. “Life is often that way. We push it away for fear of it overwhelming us and at the same time beckon it forward and hold it tight.”

“That’s exactly how I feel. How did you know?”

Joseph Adams shrugged. “I’ve been through much in the way of pomp and ceremony. Usually it was on someone else’s behalf, but I too have had my moments. Just relax and realize you are among friends. I have the utmost confidence in you, my dear.”

Carolina took her father’s arm and held it tight. “You have given me so much, Papa,” she whispered. “I’ve cherished it all. The books, the tutoring, and mostly your understanding. All of it has given me a new outlook on the future, and I pray I might always be this happy.”

The music was much louder with the door open, and with a glance upward, Joseph gently tugged her along with him into the hall. “Come. They are waiting for you.”

34

No Longer a Child

Carolina entered the ballroom on the arm of her father. In her family it was tradition, as it was with most, that she not be allowed to attend a formal evening ball until after being presented to society. Now, standing near the threshold with all eyes directed toward her, Carolina felt her heart nearly beat out of her chest.

The room fell silent, and Joseph cleared his throat with a couple of gravelly coughs. “I am delighted to have the privilege of your company this evening. I am even more delighted to present my daughter, Carolina, to you on this, her sixteenth birthday.” Everyone clapped politely, and before another word was uttered the orchestra struck up a waltz, and father led daughter to the dance floor with great flourish.

“This is your dance, my dear,” Joseph said, and taking her into his arms, he twirled her into the steps of Weber’s
Invitation to the Dance
.

James leaned casually against the wall and watched Carolina with guarded eyes. She swayed to the music, a vision in the glittering gown, seeming not to even be aware of the crowd around her. She laughed at something her father had said, and the amusement of the moment found its way into her eyes, making them sparkle with delight.

“Where have they hidden her?” one young man asked his companion.

“Behind her sister, I’d say. Virginia is more to my liking; why, just look at the way that pink dress of hers shows off her shape.”

“I still say that the younger Miss Adams is just as stunning. I only wish that gown were done up a little differently. You can’t get a good look at her . . . well . . .” He laughed. “Shall we say, her womanly charms.” Both men laughed at this.

James prickled at the continuing conversation regarding Carolina’s obvious attributes. When he could tolerate no more, he turned to glare at the younger men until they fell silent. Oddly their crass comments about Virginia hadn’t rankled him nearly as much as those concerning Carolina. It’s only because she’s so innocent and inexperienced, he thought. Virginia could hold her own among any crowd and, no doubt, with any suitor, but Carolina was different. She was clearly an unplucked blossom, just starting to bloom. He could not feel charitable toward the hooligans he’d overheard, trying to force their attention on one so naive and pure.

James was startled at his protective reflection. And he smiled slightly at what Carolina’s response to that protectiveness would be. On this of all days she’d be furious at being treated like a child. But James wondered if that was entirely where his attitude had come from. He tried not to think about it.

The music ended and everyone clapped again for the young woman being presented to society. When the orchestra started up a lively reel, couples soon joined Carolina and her father on the floor, and the evening of dance was officially begun.

James realized he’d be expected to seek out Virginia for this dance, so leaving off with his brooding, he went in search of her. The rhythmic pulse of the dance was contagious, and he found himself walking to the beat. Little by little the atmosphere was getting into his blood.

He spied Virginia in the middle of several young men, all who seemed to be begging for her company. When he was within earshot he heard her exclaim, “I couldn’t possibly dance with any of you just yet. I’ve promised the first dance to James Baldwin.”

The statement, though accurate and completely acceptable, caused James to pause. The full implication of the message was that she belonged to him and all others were to keep hands off. At least that was the message he received.

“Gentlemen,” he announced, trying not to feel hemmed in by the statement, “I believe this dance is mine.”

Virginia smiled amicably at the others and extended her arm to James. “I’ll see what I can do about the next dance,” she flirted openly, not noticing the scowl on James’ face.

“You shouldn’t encourage them,” he said, leading her to join the others.

“I’m not an engaged woman,” she answered coyly and added with a smile, “at least not yet. I suppose we could rectify that.”

Before James could answer she was swept into a chain of feminine dancers, while he went in the opposite direction in a circle of men. It would take several moments before they’d come back around to dance with each other again. He didn’t mind the lapse at all, and even less so when the wreathing chain of men and women stopped and Carolina reached out to take him as her partner. But James hesitated slightly, fearing to allow himself to fully enjoy the moment.

“Step it up, Jimmy, we’re being bested by the others,” she laughed and twirled around him, moving first in front and then behind in cadence with the music.

James swallowed hard and tried to concentrate on the dance.

“You look like you’ve been sucking persimmons,” Carolina whispered when the dance brought them cheek to cheek.

James laughed at this, and the shock seemed to wear off a bit. “I just wasn’t expecting to get to dance with you this early on. You make a fetching picture tonight, and I feel very honored to—”

“Oh, be done with it, James,” Carolina frowned. “I’m not a child anymore. I know you’d rather be dancing with Virginia. Don’t worry. They’ll circle you back around before you know it.”

Before he could answer, Carolina was whirled to the next partner, and James received the thick-waisted Kate Milford. It went on like that until James had experienced eight such partners before Virginia was on his arm again.

“My, but this is fun,” she said in complete delight.

“I was thinking it’s rather like being the grain at a mill.”

“Why, James Baldwin, what a thing to say!” She pretended to be offended with his observation, but he saw through her pretense.

“Well, if you’d had your feet ground into the floor as many times as I have, you’d feel the same way.”

Virginia laughed and the sound rose up lyrically against his ear. The music ended, leaving the breathless couples clinging to each other’s arms for only a heartbeat before sedately backing away.