Innocence (20 page)

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Authors: Holly J. Gill

BOOK: Innocence
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He had to gain the strength to carry on, as all eyes were on him and his mum with her mouth open. “She hated her mum and wanted to get away.” He paused to breathe and gulped hard. “Okay…I wanted to try and help Kacey...and therefore needed to understand her hostility against her mum.” He sobbed. “But it was clear there was a massive issue. Kacey…sorry Sophie, told me she should be the one bearing the cold shoulder and not her mum, she couldn’t forgive or forget,” he said, using the back of his hand to wipe the tears away from his cheek, followed by blowing his nose.

Calvin continued, “I needed to understand why this grudge was being held. So Kacey, sorry,” he said, not being use to calling her by her name real name. “Sophie, explained, the whole event was emotional for her. I could see she didn’t wish to tell me, but in order to help her I had to know.

“I recall Sophie leaving the village a few months after my party. I went to her house, as I liked her. I liked her a lot. Only I got told she left home. I did ask where she’d gone, but her mum, typically, wasn’t obliging, which all makes sense now. I left it and walked away with my head low. I never had a day pass without me thinking about her. I had thought when home I should go and see if she had returned home, hoping wherever she had gone had failed. That wasn’t the case, I couldn’t bring myself to go to the house, I asked around the village but no-one had seen her.”

“I recall you asking us about her when you had returned home from university,” his mum added.

“Yes, yes I did, you told me she had moved to York that was more information that her mum had ever told me.”

“Her mum hardly spoke about her,” his mum added. “We presumed she had rebelled. Rosalind never wished to talk about her.

“I bet she didn’t,” he sneered. “Anyway…” he said and added a short pause to see Ross stood in the far corner clearly annoyed with his best friend. “Anyway, forget all that. The reason she left the village was because her mum forced her to…” He froze and his eyes filled up with tears and his stomach twisted. He covered his mouth with his hand feeling sick to the point he was close to vomiting.

“Oh God,” he said, wallowing up.

“Just say it, Calvin,” his mum coaxed.

“Her mum made her…” He breathed heavily, struggling to bring himself to even say the word. He wiped mouth. Nerves rattled around in his body and his chest was so tight he struggled to breathe. He rubbed his face, anxious to tell the truth, but he knew he had to. He had to tell them the truth. However, it was using that word, he hated. Abortion.

“What did Rosalind make her do?” his mum sharp.

He lifted his head to glance in her eyes.

“I swear, Mum, I had no idea. If I had I would have helped, but I had no idea and she has no idea who I am or what I have worked out. Please, we need to support her. She needs love and care, stability in her life and we need to help her look after the little one,” he fretted.

“Calvin, that child is not yours,” Ross spoke when Calvin sharply glared at him.

“No, but it would’ve been nine years ago,” he snarled.

“What,” his mum shouted.

Calvin turned his head back to his mum. “Her mum made, no forced, Sophie to abort her baby, my baby.” His knees turned to jelly and he collapsed in a heap on the floor a broken man.

“Oh my goodness… Calvin are you saying the reason she left the village was because she was expecting your baby?” his mum asked, hearing Ross and his father gasping. Calvin curled into a tight ball, sobbing, destroyed by the grief of his baby being killed.

“No,” he said, lifting his head. “She left the village because she hated her mum for making her terminate her pregnancy.”

“Oh my goodness, Rosalind kept that one quiet and I thought Sophie, had left because she was a typical
I know it all kid
.”

“No, Mum, she left because she couldn’t stand her mother for making her do what she did. I have only just worked it out,” he said, breaking down as his world shattered around him. “Me getting her pregnant was only the start of her taking a road to destruction tipping her life and world upside down,” he said filled with guilt.

“Nonsense, I am not having you talking like that. Where is Sophie?” his mum asked.

Ross interrupted, “The cottage at the pub.”

“Did you know about her?” his mum asked stressed.

Calvin lifted his head to hear his answer.

“Yes, I knew they had sex at the party, but I had no idea why she left the village or any knowledge she had fallen pregnant.”

“So,” his mum said, crouching before him holding his knees. “Does she know who you are?”

He shook his head.
I am certain I have already told you no, Mum, but I just cannot talk anymore. Oh God…my baby is dead and never stood a chance of living.

His mum stood. Calvin felt the heartache running through his body. Everything, Sophie had been through had started from when he got her pregnant. There were no words to describe the pain he suffered, let alone what Sophie had been going through.

Where did he go from here?

 

* * * *

 

Kacey was hot and bothered not to mention bored. She would be the first to admit she missed Calvin popping in and seeing her. Her heart broke at the thought today he would be heading back down to London. She would miss him terribly. He’d been the first person to show they cared, as a friend, Kacey wouldn’t have it any other way.

She rubbed her hand over her tummy really wishing her daughter would move. She just hoped Calvin hadn’t forgotten about taking her to the doctor, after all, it had been a few days since the baby moved and now she was deeply concerned. Kacey had tried poking her, or pressing the palm of her hand on her tummy, but still nothing, well unsure if she felt a slight flutter but nothing major. She guessed the baby was sleeping and no doubt would start kicking her when she needed to sleep.

Deciding to take a short walk down the lane, needing air, needing to do something to past the time until, hopefully Calvin arrived. As she walked she pulled out weeds and de-leafed them along the way, the sun shone down, making the walk pleasant without a sound other than the birds singing and the cattle in the nearby fields. Gardens where coming into bloom with flowers and bluebells littered the grass verge. The trees and bushes where starting to turn green. She loved spring and summer so glorious and pretty full of natural life. The wind blew gently in her long hair using her hand to place it behind her ear. To her right she saw a cottage coming up with an old brick stone wall. The garden alive with a large blossom tree and the scent so sweet as a few petals fell down to the ground like confetti.

She perched on the brick wall and watched a few cars pass by and heard the sound of a tractor in the distance. She inhaled a deep breath loving the quiet life, reminding her of her childhood and the good times before hell let loose. Kacey resented the fact she’d told Calvin the truth about what happened all those years ago, but then it felt better that someone now knew of her mishaps and the reason why she was where she was. It was not like she deliberately set out to be homeless or get knocked up by a womanizing drug dealer who smoked and drank his life away. She didn’t wish to think about him and how her life was so screwed up in trouble and how she found herself in situations that put her life in danger.

Instead she sat breathing in the country air, the wind blowing gently through her hair making her feel relaxed, not a care in the world, just calm and tranquil. She closed her eyes for a few minutes listening to the atmosphere surrounding her. She would give anything to have it all back. She messed up with her life, but had to make the right decisions, not just for her but the baby.

Slowly waddling back to the pub she became thirsty and her feet started to swell, certain the heat was contributing to that. Her back was playing her up as well. Holding her back and giving it a little rotate, she realized the bump was just getting too heavy and still had ten weeks to go.

Breathing in more country air she wondered when Calvin would arrive to take her to the doctor. She looked up and noticed a couple standing and staring at her stood on the corner of the pub. They both froze and gazed anxiously at her, looking relieved they had seen her. She walked slowly closer recognizing the couple. She thought back to when she had seen the couple, but then having grown up in the area she was sure there were many faces she would recognize.

She walked forward as the woman dressed in jeans and a floaty pink blouse walked toward her.

“Hello, Sophie,” she said.

Kacey froze.
They know my name?
The woman and gentleman did look familiar.

“Hi,” she said back.

“Wow, long time no see, and I see you are with child,” she smiled.

“Yeah,” she answered, rubbing her tummy.

“Do you remember us?” the woman asked, keeping her distance.

“I recognize you, but not sure who you are. I guess from my childhood.” She smiled, trying to lighten the mood. Both the couple looked at her mystified.

“When are you due?”

“Not for another ten weeks, although she has been quiet. I’m waiting for a friend to take me to the doctor.” Sophie glanced down to her bump and kneaded it.

“Oh, I see, nervous times I would imagine.”

“Yes, yes they are, but I’m sure we’ll be fine,” she said smiling, not liking the fact the couple were being nosy, especially as they were strangers to her.

“I’m sure you will be both fine. We know your parents,” the woman said grinning.

“Oh, I would imagine you do if you live in the village,” Kacey mentioned.

“We actually live in the hall, down the lane close to the river,” she announced.

Kacey widened her eyes aware they’re the owners of the river where she tried…she was not thinking that way, but even worse…the parents of— Panic took over her!
Oh shit…divert the conversation and fast!

“Oh, so you will know my parents as they are your friends,” Kacey smiled.

“Yes, Rosalind and Alan?”

“Yep, those are my parents,” she said, trying to be humorous and smiling.

“That is right, we were with them the other day and they never mentioned you coming to visit the village?”

Kacey struggled to stand tall having her back aching.

“Sorry, I need to sit down,” she said as the woman moved out of the way and the couple followed her down the side of the pub. Kacey walked to the rear of the establishment to the bench near the cottage.

“No, they didn’t know. My visit was unexpected,” she announced, taking the weight off her swollen ankles. She kicked her shoes off.

“Could we get you a drink,” the man asked.

“Yes please, it is stifling hot.”

“Yes and I bet you’re struggling with the heat being in your condition?”

“Yes, I think my body is heading off the temperature gauge.”

“Yes, I would agree with that. So your parents know you are here?” she asked. Kacey had no idea why she was interested in her life or even what it had to do with them.

“They do, but my mum being stubborn, slammed the door in my face—”

The woman interrupted, “What, even in your condition?”

“Yep. I am getting help in finding a home.”

“You’re homeless?” she said surprised.

“I am,” she replied when the man arrived with the cordial drinks and placed them on the table. Kacey couldn’t wait to take a sip and ended up gulping the liquid down, not coming up for air until her thirst was quenched. “Sorry, thirsty.”

“That’s okay. Do you remember our names?” the woman asked, sitting on the opposite side of the table while the man remained standing, wearing his sunglasses.

“No, sorry.”

“Gordon and Anne.”

“Nice to meet you both, hearing your names has jogged my memory,” she scoffed gazing at the couple.

“We have a son.”
Oh crap, double crap…keep acting dumb…

“Oh right… yes… I do remember him, cute thing, dead sweet and sincere,” Kacey said back and swallowed heavily. How could she forget him?

“How come you are calling yourself, Kacey?” she asked.

Kacey jerked her head and tensed her body.
How the hell did they know that information?
“Because, being called Sophie reminded me of my mum, when she nagged me all the time when I was younger. However, when this one is born, I am calling her Kacey,” she said told them.

“I see, and your mother slammed the door in your face?”

“Yes, yesterday. But, I have a friend who is helping me at the moment, thankfully.” Aware what she told them really was none of their business. They might be familiar, but strangers.

“Curious, do you remember what our son was called?” Anne asked.

Oh for God sake, what the hell! Do I really need to go there?

Kacey tried to think back, but she’d been and seen so many people since leaving the village. What she did remember was him and her…in the barn of the night of his eighteenth, which was when her life turned sour. However, she couldn’t recall his name. She was pretty good with faces, well kind-of but names, not so well. Trying hard to think of his name, what she did recollect was his name started with c.

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