Losing the Ice (Ice Series #2) (2 page)

“Takes a lot to pay the bills, doesn’t it?” Mrs. Tucker said pointedly.

When Josh’s parents had cut him off financially after we’d paired up, they’d seemed to think he wouldn’t survive on his own. But I’d never doubted he’d do just fine.

“I’m busy, but I’m loving everything I’m doing,” he said.

Mrs. Tucker hummed quietly in response. “What about you, Courtney? You’re still bartending?”

“Yes… I am.”

“And you’ve continued to live with your coaches.” The snide tone of her comment couldn’t be missed.

I sat up straighter and cleared my throat. “I’ve never taken advantage of Emily and Sergei’s generosity. I’ve offered to pay them rent, but they won’t let me, so I help out with the twins and any other way I can.”

“I’m surprised you haven’t shacked up with Josh yet,” Stephanie said.

Josh sent her a warning glare while I took a long gulp of water. This was exactly how I’d expected the dinner to go, but it didn’t make it any easier to sit through.

“He lives in that woman Mrs. Cassar’s pool house,” Mrs. Tucker said. “I’m sure Courtney would rather stay at Emily and Sergei’s spacious home.”

I set my glass down with a hard thump. “If Josh and I wanted to live together, I’d be happy in a cardboard box with him.”

So much for not being sassy.

“Only because you know he has a trust fund to fall back on,” Mrs. Tucker sassed in return.

I gritted my teeth and held in my comeback. She was baiting me into an outburst. She wanted nothing more than for me to act like the classless girl she thought I was.

Everyone stayed silent, deeply breathing in the tension, until Josh said quietly, “Why did you come?”

Mrs. Tucker tilted her head slightly. “Why did I come?”

“You obviously haven’t accepted the choices I’ve made or changed your attitude toward Court.”

“I came to see what you gave up your guaranteed successful future for.”

A decent mother would’ve said,
I came to spend time with my son who I haven’t seen in months.
But no. That wasn’t her motivation.

“So, you’re not here to support us,” Josh said. “Do you even want us to skate well?”

“What I want is for you to be successful in life, and doing odd jobs and skating with your girlfriend isn’t going to get you there.”

I let out a loud, frustrated breath. “It’s not like he’s flipping burgers… not that there would be anything wrong with that… but you heard him before. He loves the work he’s doing, and he gets to use his amazing talent every day.”

Josh folded his napkin and calmly placed it on the table. “We’re not staying for dinner. I’m not putting Court through another hour of this.”

He stood, and I glanced at Mrs. Tucker’s and Stephanie’s stunned faces before getting to my feet.

“You already ordered your meal,” Mrs. Tucker said.

“Tell the waiter he can take it home,” Josh said as he helped me with my jacket.

“You don’t have to leave. We can talk about something else.” Stephanie shot a sideways dagger at her mother.

Josh shrugged on his own jacket. “I’m sorry, but I don’t see any hope for this conversation.”

He put his hand on my lower back, and I took his cue. Neither of us looked back, and we didn’t speak until we reached the stoplight at the crosswalk.

“I don’t know why I thought that would go any differently,” Josh said.

“Because you have an optimistic heart.” I caressed the back of his neck.

We crossed the slick street and kept going past the hotel. I had the feeling Josh needed to walk out his frustration.

“I want us to kill it this weekend to show her how wrong she is.” He picked up his pace, and I quickened my step. “Not that she’d ever admit it.”

“I think she’d rather wear discount clothes for a week than do that.”

He didn’t appear to catch my attempt at humor as his forehead creased with intense thought. “If we skate great, she might not admit she’s wrong, but she’ll know it.”

What if we don’t skate great?
I wanted to ask but couldn’t bring myself to say out loud. I hadn’t told Josh how nervous I was because I didn’t know if that would make
him
more anxious. Since we hadn’t experienced a competition together yet, I hadn’t learned how he dealt with the pressure.

Nothing like figuring out those important things at a major international event. With our biggest critic in the front row.

Chapter Two

I patted my stockinged thighs and rubbed them hard to stay warm. The backstage area of the Rose Garden Arena felt colder than the walk-in freezer at work. I couldn’t wait to get moving in our short program so I could defrost.

Josh sat beside me, staring down at his folded hands. He wasn’t a loud person by any means, but this was quiet even for him. He hadn’t said much of anything during our six-minute warm-up on the ice or the entire time we’d been backstage. I’d been holding in a nervous bundle of chatter all evening. If he needed silence to stay in his competitive zone, then I would give it to him. First lesson I was learning about my new partner.

Em picked up our water bottles and offered them to Josh and me. “Need a drink?”

“I’m good, thanks,” I said, while Josh looked up and silently shook his head.

Em had made the trip alone with us since Sergei had to accompany their novice and junior teams to Eastern Sectionals in Pennsylvania. I adored both my coaches, but Em and I had an extra-special relationship, so I was glad she was there for the start of this new chapter of my career.

“Time to get ready.” She motioned us toward the corridor to the ice.

I unzipped my Team USA jacket, and when we reached the end of the hallway I gave it to Em. My hands fidgeted with the braids woven into my up-do, then the halter neckline of my rose-colored dress, and then the hem of my short skirt. Josh stepped in front of me, and he gently grasped my shoulders, stilling me. I stared up at him and took in a slow breath.

His long-sleeved, V-neck shirt showed off his lean muscles and matched the color of my dress perfectly. We’d worn our costumes at a dress rehearsal at home, but looking at us together now, standing just a few feet from competition ice, it really hit me.

We are
a team.
We are truly a TEAM.

The jitters shaking my legs kicked into a higher gear, and if Josh hadn’t been holding onto me, I probably would’ve collapsed into a trembling heap. He rubbed my arms with long, warm strokes, and slowly my butterflies simmered down.

His eyes roamed over me and met mine with a deep gaze. “God, you are so beautiful.”

My butterflies fluttered their wings happily, and I locked Josh in a tight hug. Leave it to him to be practically mute all night and then to say something so sweet.

“I just want you to know…” His soft voice tickled my ear. “Skating here with you tonight is an absolute dream come true for me.”

I pulled back and framed his face with my hands. “I am
so
happy to be doing this with you.”

He smiled. “Then let’s do it.”

We walked out under the bright lights of the arena and joined in the applause for the Canadian team taking their bows. As soon as they approached the boards, I pulled off my skate guards and hopped onto the ice. While I glided around the rink, loosening my legs, I slowly stretched my arms over my head and out wide. It was a relaxation technique Josh had shared with me.

He skated to my side, and we slowed to a stop in front of Em at the boards. She focused her bright blue eyes on us and patted our hands.

“I know you’ve waited for this a long time, so just enjoy every moment. Feed off the incredible connection you have with each other.”

We nodded and each took a quick sip of water before we turned away from the boards to receive our introduction.

“Our next team represents the United States. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Courtney Carlton and Joshua Tucker.”

My heartbeat thumped in time with the loud applause from the crowd. I looked at Josh, and he gave me a wide smile. I could see the excitement brimming in his eyes. We skated to center ice and spent the next few seconds and a few deep breaths getting into our starting position. My right hand rested on Josh’s chest while his cupped my hip. Our eyes met and didn’t let go.

The romantic piano notes of “Kissing You” began, and we started slowly across the ice, still locked in our gaze. Goosebumps lined my neck and my arms, and I let myself bask in the magic of the moment for just a second. Then I quickly thought about our first element, the explosive triple twist.

Josh took my hand, and we moved side by side, building up speed with only a few strokes. I envisioned my body spinning in the perfect twist right before I stabbed my toe pick into the ice. Josh tossed me up above his head, and I curled into three tight revolutions. When I came down safely in his strong grip, I exhaled and kept my eyes on Josh’s as we flew around the corner of the rink.

The warmth of Josh’s hand left mine as we split apart for our side-by-side triple Salchows. My body tensed with anxiety, and I repeated over and over to myself,
Free and easy. Free and easy.

I pushed off with my back inside edge and spun three times in the air. My right blade landed on the ice with a scratchy thud, but I held firm for a clean exit. I couldn’t see if Josh had completed three rotations, too, but he smiled at me, and I suddenly felt a lot looser.
He must have done the jump cleanly, too!

Reining in my excitement, I focused my energy on the next tricky element, the throw triple flip. The music climbed higher, and Josh sprang me into the air right on the crescendo. I spun so fast I almost wasn’t ready for the landing when my blade hit the ice. Once again I kept my leg steady and rode out the deep curve, and I got an even bigger smile from Josh.

We stroked forward and sped into the step sequence, which took us from one end of the rink to the other. Josh and Em had choreographed it together, and every step accented the nuances of the beautiful song. We twizzled in perfect unison to finish the sequence, and Josh took my hand once more to prepare for our overhead lift.

The people in the stands whooshed by me as we powered forward. Josh swung me up above his head with a lasso motion, and he began to rotate, not losing any speed. I started to change positions, but I felt Josh’s feet losing their grip on the ice. Panic seized my chest, and I fumbled to grasp Josh’s shoulder for support.

No, no, no.

Josh reached up and grabbed me as his skates flew out from under him, and we crashed to the ice, my body on top of his. The back of his head slammed onto the hard surface, and I gasped in terror as his eyes shut.

“Josh?” I slid off him, and the cold stung my legs. “Josh!”

I touched his cheek, but he didn’t move.

“Josh!”

I leaned over him, hoping to see his eyes open, flutter,
anything
. But there was nothing.

Oh my God.

“Help!” I yelled toward the ice door, but the rinkside paramedics were already shuffling over to us.

The music had stopped, and everything was so quiet. One of the medics gently pulled me away from Josh’s lifeless body while the others swarmed around him.

“Are you okay?” She looked me over.

All I could manage was a dazed nod. Josh had cushioned my fall. He’d taken the full brunt of it. And now he wasn’t waking up.

Oh my God,
oh my God.

My throat burned with tears, and I covered my mouth with both hands. The medics had Josh surrounded, so I couldn’t see what they were doing to him. The lady holding my shoulders tried to coax me to leave the ice, but I wouldn’t budge.

“I’m not leaving him.” I shook my head violently.

“Court!” Em called from the open ice door.

She looked like she wanted to run out to me, but she couldn’t in her heels. She waved for me to go over to her, and when I refused, she motioned more forcefully. I finally gave in but kept watching the medics as I skated away from them. They had strapped a brace around Josh’s head and were putting him on a stretcher.

Em swept me into her arms the moment I reached her. “You’re okay?”

The fear in her voice made me cry even harder. I nodded and pressed my face to her wool dress.

“He hit his head so hard,” I said between sobs.

She hugged me tighter. “He’s going to be okay.”

I wanted to believe that, but I couldn’t shake the image of Josh falling unconscious right before me. Watching his beautiful blue eyes go dark to the world.

The medics were carefully taking Josh off the ice, and I started to rush forward to meet them. Em held me back and said, “I’ll ride with him to the hospital. You get changed, and we’ll get you there as soon as possible.”

“I have to go with him!” I cried.

Our federation team leader Marni took charge of ushering me backstage. “One of the volunteers will drive us. We’ll only be a few minutes behind the ambulance.”

“I’ll call Josh’s mom to let her know where we’re headed,” Em said.

She gave me one last intense hug before hurrying after the paramedics. I raced to the locker room and did the quickest change of my life. Normally I took meticulous care of my skates, but I just threw them in my bag. When I came out to meet Marni, my parents and Mrs. Cassar were standing with her.

Mom embraced me first and Dad followed. I soaked in all the comfort from them I could, but nothing could ease the fear in my heart.

Mrs. Cassar grasped my arms firmly. “Joshua is a strong young man. You remember that.”

The way she called Josh by his full name always made me smile, but hearing it then only made me tearier. As we all hurried outside, Mom and Dad gave me more assurances and I just kept nodding. They had to be right. Josh
had
to be okay.

Thankfully, the ride to the hospital wasn’t long because my nerves couldn’t handle another second in the car, not knowing what was happening. We found the emergency room, and Josh’s family was already there with Em. Stephanie spotted me, and her puffy, red eyes narrowed. She stalked toward me and stopped inches from my face.