Authors: Kirby Elaine
I was waiting for my hands to stop shaking as I stood outside of my father’s hospital room. Nothing changed since the night before. Krishna had driven us home and we ended up talking all night about my childhood and hers. I fell asleep entwined in her and awoke with a new sense of the man my father made me.
His room was empty when I entered. He lay there alone for the first time since he was admitted. I had encouraged my sister to go home and get sleep and Patricia told me herself that she needed air. Liam on the other hand had been in and out. He was in constant contact with lawyers in case my father didn’t recover. There were three major corporations that would revert to the three of us in the case of his passing. I closed the door behind me and sat in the chair beside my father’s bed. I listened to the machines beep.
“You have to beat this, Dad.” I said leaning forward and grabbing his cold hand. This was a nightmare and I couldn’t wake up. So I just held my father’s hand.
***
I sat on the balcony off my room as the crowd in the yard continued to grow. It was Liam and Leah’s sixteenth birthday. Though Leah and I had grown close over the couple of year I had been around, Liam still had a severe distaste for me. Not to mention everyone knew that I was the product of my father’s indiscretions. Not something that I could exactly hide.
“Why are you hiding out up here?” My father’s voice startled me. I shrugged my shoulders.
“Don’t feel much like hanging out with Liam’s friends, they aren’t my friends.” I remarked looking at the guys huddled around the buffet table.
“So? It’s your sibling’s birthday, the least you can do is socialize a bit. I get that you feel uncomfortable around these crowds but you’re my son too. I’d like to see you having a good time with your brother and sister.” I sat on the rail across from me. He peered over the side.
“Liam doesn’t want anything to do with me. He’s embarrassed by me and blames me for Kat.” I replied. I picked at my nails waiting for my father’s response.
“You know what son, Kat was sick long before you got here. She was depressed and at the end of her rope. If the pills didn’t kill her, the cancer would have. I know that, Leah knows that and Liam knows that. You’re the scapegoat for him, that’s all. He is a lost kid and needs someone to blame. But consider this, he’s okay blaming you because he knows you won’t turn your back on him. You keep pushing long enough, he’ll let you in.” His eyes watered.
“Dad,” I mumbled. “you think he’ll ever see me as his brother?”
“Michael, someday, you’ll be his best friend, I promise.” The tall man stood and placed his hand on my shoulder. “Go have some fun.”
I walked through the house and out into the festivities. I watched Liam as I talked to a girl from school about my piece of junk car sitting in the driveway. She went on to tell me about a book she had read as looked right pass her at my brother as he laughed with his friends. I thought about what my father told me and decided I’d keep trying until Liam let me in.
***
“Why don’t you go home and get rest, honey?” Patricia said patting my arm awakening me from my slumber. I cleared the haze over my eyes and let go of my father’s hand. I stood and wrapped my arms around my step-mother. “It’s okay, honey. He’s fighting, else he would have already let go.”
“I know.” I said, releasing her. “It’s just hard to imagine that this could happen to him.”
“Well, your father is no saint, Michael, and things like this happen to the best of us.” She patted my back as I grabbed my keys from the chair where I had sat.
“I’ll be back in a few hours. I’m going to make sure Krishna and the kids are okay. Call me if anything changes.” I kissed her on the cheek and left the room. No sooner had I gotten in my car did my phone began buzzing. My brother had called three times in the past hour. I answered.
“Michael, tell me you’re still at the hospital.”
“I left a few minutes ago. I’m headed your way. What’s going on?” I pulled into the traffic and weave through it effortlessly.
“The family lawyer has asked to talk with us, Patricia too, but since you’re headed this way, I’ll have him head over.”
“And Patricia?” I asked.
“I don’t know. He asked us to invite her as a courtesy. Apparently he found something that is not so good in Dad’s papers.”
“Shit!” I knew exactly what it was. “Be there in fifteen minutes.” I hung up the phone and picked up speed. My father definitely wasn’t going to pull through this now, not if he had a medical directive in place. I knew that’s what the papers were going to tell us. That man and his damn reputation, he didn’t want to look weak.
When I hit the door, the lawyer was already there and Leah and Liam were both with him in the sitting room. I took a seat and looked between my brother and sister. My eyes landed on Liam who mouthed, “what the hell is it?” at me before giving the lawyer his attention.
The tall, thin man sat a manila folder on the glass coffee table and slid it towards Liam. Liam picked it up and looked at us before opening it.
“It’s called an advance medical directive.” The lawyer stated.
“No life support?” I asked.
“The lines can be kind of blurry with that.” He reached for the folder and Liam gladly handed it back. “If there is no reasonable expectation of recovery, we have to pull the life support immediately.”
“You can’t do that!” Leah yelled.
“It’s not my decision. Legally there is nothing that I can do. Leah, your father is more than a client to me, he’s one of my closest friends. I can understand the hardship in having to carry out this wish but it was what your father wanted.” He looked at Liam. “We have to honor his final wishes.”
“I’ll take that.” I grabbed the folder from him and began reading the twenty page document. “We do nothing until I’ve read through this in its entirety. Understood?” I told the lawyer who again looked to Liam. “Understood?” I barked. It got his attention and he nodded. I closed the folder and retreated to my bedroom. I was going to mill over every word in the document until I found what I needed to keep my dad on life support.
“Everything okay?” Krishna asked setting down two cups of tea on the dresser.
“It will be. My father has a living will. We may have to pull life support. I’m trying to find a way around it.”
“But if it’s what your dad wants, maybe we should give that to him.” She commented taking up residence on the bed beside me.
“We?” I laughed. “This is not your decision to make; he’s not your father.”
“You’re being a dick, Michael. Get that in check now. I am not the one to be giving attitude to.” She stood and grabbed her tea from the dresser and sat back down beside me.
“You know what I mean, Krishna. I’m not getting into this with you. Not right now while my father is in the hospital dying.”
“Let me read it when you’re done.
We
will find a way around this.” She sipped her tea. I dropped the papers onto the bed beside me and grabbed my wife’s hand.
“Sorry. You’re right, we’re a team.” I kissed her and scooted to the top of the bed dragging the papers with me. Krishna scooted back to and as I finished the first page, she picked it up and read over it.
“I think I found the loophole!” Krishna nearly shouted.
“What is it?” I took the papers from her hand.
“This directive is out of date.”
“The lawyer assured me that my father was given the option to make changes to it as yearly as his will. That won’t work.”
“Look at the date on the original signature.”
“Got damn.” I looked at the date. “No way can they say he was of sound mind. I’m calling the lawyer, now!”
Michael paced the room as he spoke on the phone with the lawyer. From what I gathered, that decision to contest the living will would be up to Patricia, as his wife and legal proxy. I don’t know how much faith Michael had in Patricia to be on their side with this but when the call ended he left the room to speak with his siblings.
I picked up my phone and texted my own brother.
K: Things aren’t looking good. I’ll be away for a while.
A: No problem. I have to head back to Michigan. I’m going to overnight you a set of keys to the house and cars. Call me when you’re heading back, I’ll try to meet you. I just have things to take care of.
K: Take your time, this is turning into a legal battle. My father-in-law has a living will.
A: That can be tough. My father had one. We had to honor it. Our culture would have it no other way. See you soon.
K: Yeah. See you soon.
I tossed my phone onto the bed and went to take a shower. By the time I had turned off the water and dried off Michael had come back into the bedroom and had fallen asleep across the bed. I took the folder from his hand and put it on the table next to the bed. I didn’t wake him; instead I curled up next to him and watched him in a rare state of peace.
My heart was breaking for my husband and his family. I knew the loss all too well. Aside from the Scott’s, I had no family left in the world before Abi walked into my life. My parents passed in a car accident when I was in college and they were all I had. My father was an only child and his parents passed long before they adopted me. My mother had a stale relationship with her parents and her only brother traveled the world doing mission trips and I had lost touch with him after her death. I thought about building a better relationship with my maternal grandparents but they had never made the effort and I honestly didn’t know if they’d want to.
But Michael, his family was my family and they were the closest most loving people I have ever met. I can’t imagine a time where Liam and Michael weren’t on speaking terms. I laughed at the stories of how Michael and Liam did business together never revealing their true relationship until Jayda got caught in the middle.
I let Michael sleep for an hour before I woke him. We were heading back to the hospital for another lengthy round of just waiting. He was ready in minutes and we piled into the car and left.
“It’s not happening.” Patricia spoke softly. We all sat in the waiting room, including the lawyer. And we were pleading for our step-mother to make the decision that none of us had the power to make.
“We’re just asking for time for him to recover.” Liam pleaded.
“You don’t think I want your father, my husband to get better?” Her voice caught in her throat. “If the doctors don’t see a reasonable chance, we have to do what you father has asked.”
“But his living will is outdated, Mama.” Leah stated handing her the folder.
“I’ve seen the papers, they don’t change anything. You don’t think Michael Joseph and I have had these conversations, we’ve been married for two decades. It’s still what he wants. We have to do what he would want.”
“You really think that he wants to give up? The man has never given up on anything in his life.” I screamed.
“Michael.” She grabbed my hand and looked up at me. “This isn’t a business acquisition. Your father was meticulous with legalities and his health. He’s seen these papers. He has made amendments to the documents. He was of sound mind and I am NOT going against his best interest.” She huffed and stormed off in the direction of our father’s room.
I looked between my siblings and their spouses before sinking into the chair behind me. This was torturing me and I didn’t know what to do.
“We don’t even have word from the doctors yet.” Leah threw her hands up. “We might be in here stirring things up for nothing. No one has said that he couldn’t pull through. And until they do, we wait!”
“And if they tell us that he doesn’t have a chance? Do we just let her pull the plug?” I asked trying not to lose the last ounce of control I had. I wasn’t that man anymore, the old me would have backed Patricia in a corner and made her cave.
“We don’t have a choice, Michael.” My brother chimed in. “If that is really what Dad wanted than that is what we do. No more fighting about it. It’s as good as being written in stone. Got it?” He glared at me. I wasn’t conceding. I wasn’t going to let my father die because he thought that was the best option.
“Whatever. I don’t give a damn what the papers say. We aren’t pulling the plug.” I spoke calmly.
“You’re not going to fight me on this. If we take this shit to court it’ll be an all out media frenzy and everyone will be coming out of the wood works to lay claim to what rightfully belongs to us.” Liam responded sternly.
“Is that what this is about? Is that what the fuck this is about for you? Brother. Fucking assets? Cars, and homes and companies. What the hell good is any of it?”
“You really think that? You think this is about money?” Liam stood over me. I could feel the pumping of blood through the veins in my neck. I unclenched my fists.
“You tell me. You don’t want to take this to court because of the media. Fuck the media.” I stood chest to chest with my brother. My blood was boiling and he was going to be the target if he didn’t back down.
“I don’t want to take this to court because I don’t want to go against what my father wanted if it’ll be in vain. You need to get in your place, Michael. Screw your head on straight.” He slapped the side of my head. Not hard enough to move me but just hard enough for me to shove back. Liam fell backwards into the chair behind him as everyone gasped and Nathan lunged towards us. Liam was back on his feet. His forearm slammed against my neck as my back it the wall.
“You do not want to do this!” He said between clenched teeth. His eyes were locked on mine. Part of me wanted to push back but the better part of me released the hold I had on his shoulders as he pulled back from me.
“I think we should honor his wishes.” Leah said above a whisper, her arms wrapped tightly around herself. My sister was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt with a white handkerchief in her hand wiping at her nose. Her mascara streamed down her face. The room fell silent as we all looked at her standing there, stoically.
I rushed to my sister’s side and enveloped her in my arms. All of this arguing and I forgot that she should have the say. Despite Patricia’s presence, Leah was our family’s matriarch and more often than not her say was final.
“Then that’s what we’ll do.” I cried. I held my sister against me letting her tears stain my shirt. I was terrified and breaking apart at the seams. It was set in stone, if the doctors didn’t tell us what we needed to hear; we were pulling the plug on our father.