My Heart Says Yes (4 page)

       “Oh!  We better get ready for the
party!  We both still have to shower and with your new gorgeous hair Emma, it
seems it takes you twice as long to get ready now.  Did you decide on those
jeans you showed me and that cute shirt?”

       “Yep, and heels of course!”

       “Heels, really?  Won’t you be
uncomfortable?”

       “Maybe.  But you know what they say,
the higher the heel, the closer to heaven!”

When we got to Kelly's
friend’s apartment, there were already a ton of people there.  I met a bunch of
her friends and I was chatting with Sophie and Rena when I noticed this guy in
the corner who was staring at me.  He had that dark, brooding, sexy thing going
on and he was drop dead gorgeous. 
Is he really looking at
me
?
 
Even though I looked different on the outside, the insecure old me was still
inside.

       “Hey, do you guys know him?"  I
try to be subtle about gesturing with my head in his direction.           

       “Yeah, that’s Caleb Morgan.  He’s a
grad student at the Art Institute.  He’s really arrogant and thinks he’s God’s
greatest gift.  The rumor is he breaks hearts left and right and he’s nothing
but trouble if you ask me.”  Rena's response was casually dismissive.

       Sophie leaned in to whisper the next
part to me.  “He’s also a trust fund baby, spoiled rotten, and used to getting
anything he wants.”

       Rena chimed in with a little more
information about him.  “His parents each manage their own hedge funds, can you
believe that?  Two hedge funds in one family!”

       “Hmmm, I wonder why he didn’t follow
in mommy and daddy’s footsteps?”  My curiosity was piqued because he seemed to
be a non-conformist and I liked that.

       “The rumor is that his parents are
placating him, waiting for him to get over his art hobby.  Supposedly that's
what they call it.  Apparently his father has wanted him to work for him since
he graduated from college, but Caleb loves art and refuses to have anything to
do with the world of finance."  Sophie seemed all too happy to spill the
beans about this guy.  "If you think you might be interested in him, don't
hold your breath.  He’s really picky and I swear he seems to have a different
model on his arm each week."

      
Do I detect a hint of bitterness?

       Sophie walked away to go get a
refill in the kitchen.

       Rena looked at me.  “Don’t mind
her.  She’s still sulking because Caleb has turned her down, um, I think we’re
up to three times now.  She has had a thing for him ever since she found out
who he is and how much money his family has.”

       “I bet he gets that all the time,
gold diggers can smell money a mile away, and people with money can usually
tell if someone only wants them for their money.”

       “Oh really?  Speaking from
experience?”  Rena cocked her eyebrow at me curious to know more.

       The last thing I wanted to do was
appear to be different from everyone else, so I brushed off her question and
changed the subject.

       "Yeah right.  So you're in grad
school with Caleb?”

       “Yes.  We both have one more year to
go, my husband will be so happy when I am done with school and using my
advanced education to actually make money.”

       “Husband?  You’re kind of young to
be married, no?”

       She chuckled at my words.  “You’re
sweet.  No hun, I’m 27 and I’ve known my husband since we were in grade school.
We both moved here from Ohio a couple of years ago after we got married.  Caleb
is actually not too far behind me, I think he’s 26.    I didn’t do the whole go
right to grad shool after college thing, I worked for a few years after college
and then decided to go back to school.  I believe Caleb traveled for a few
years and then landed in grad school.  That’s the life, huh?  Jet setting
around the world without a care in the world.”

       “Yeah, must be nice.”  I didn’t tell
Rena that I had done something similar the summer after I graduated from high
school.  I traveled all over Europe that summer with Kelly and we had the most
incredible time.  I had never been one to brag about what we had, I didn’t want
anyone to ever treat me differently because of who my parents were.  But I was
grateful for what we had because I knew so many people had so little.  I also
knew that one day I was going to be heavily involved in some sort of charity
work.  I wanted to give back in some way to those who were less fortunate, I
just hadn’t yet figured out what that was going to be.  That was something that
was a priority on my list since I now lived in Chicago.

       “So Emma, any boyfriend?”

       “No, doing the single thing for a
while.  I recently broke up with someone after dating him for nearly two
years.  He wanted to get married and I didn’t so we parted ways.  I’m going to
take some time for myself, at least a year, to enjoy being single.”

       “A year, huh?  You know, they say
the best time to find someone is when you’re not looking.”

       “Hmmm, they do, do they?  And who is
they?”

       “You know…those people.” 

       It sounded so ridiculous that we
looked at each other and burst out laughing. 

       I glanced over at Caleb and his eyes
caught mine and then slowly pored over my body.  I felt my cheeks flush,
suddenly very aware of his presence as his gaze nearly brought my laughter with
Rena to an abrupt halt.  My body had never reacted to a man like this before. 
He’s
totally out of my league and I can see why he only dates models, but I don’t
care.  Dammit he is good-looking!
  He was very masculine and drop-dead
gorgeous.  He had pretty boy looks with his perfect dark hair, straight nose,
strong jaw and dark eyes.  He could easily have been a model; he was lean but
not skinny, with the perfect amount of muscles for me.  I had to tear my eyes
away from him or everyone would see me gawking and the last thing I wanted to
do was draw attention to my instant attraction to this man.  Thankfully Rena
didn’t notice what happened as she asked me more about myself.  I found that I
was really enjoying talking with her; she was a cool woman.

       “So Emma, Kelly tells me that you
are starting portfolio school and you want to go into advertising.  Since the
Chicago Portfolio school is a one year program do you have any idea which
advertising firm you’ll be looking at?”

       “I would love to get a job at Ogilvy
& Mather and I know that competition is really stiff there, but that is my
dream place to work.”

       “I have a couple of friends that
work there, and it’s a lot of work but they love it.  I can put you in touch
with them as your interview process gets closer.  Let’s exchange info so we can
keep in touch.”

       “Wow Rena, thank you so much, that’s
really generous of you.”

       “Hey, we all can use a good contact
here and there.  It’s no problem at all.”

       We took out our phones and finished
exchanging info right as Kelly walked up to us.

       “Oh good, I’m glad you guys are
chatting.  I knew you two would hit it off.  Hey, there is a ton of food in the
kitchen if you’re hungry.”

       “Ooh, I am starving.  What time did
we eat lunch Kelly?”

       “I think it was around 1:00, and
it’s almost 11:00.  I don’t know how you haven’t passed out by now!”

       “I didn’t realize it was so late! 
Yeah, I’m headed to the kitchen.”

       We all went to get some snacks and
when we walked in Caleb was standing in the corner talking with a really
pretty, tall, blonde.  Our eyes caught and then held as I walked toward the
food tray.  My mouth was dry and my heart started to pound as he seemed to
focus all of his attention on me.  The girl he was with noticed and turned
around and gave me a dismissive glance when she saw that I was the recipient of
his intense gaze.  My confidence began to wane a bit under her withering
glance, but then I remembered that it was me that took the attention away from
the pretty girl standing in front of him.  I know that I was on this whole
single kick, but this guy was really beginning to affect me.

       I was a bundle of nerves and I
dropped a cube of cheese that I had on my plate.  As I bent to pick it up, I
felt Caleb's eyes on me and I quickly glanced at him as he seemed to be
admiring my backside.  My cheeks felt like they were on fire and I am sure I
looked like I was overheated.  I saw the concerned look on Kelly face and I
wished that there was a way that I could have quickly disguised my body's
reaction to Caleb.

       "Emma, are you feeling okay? 
You're all flushed, maybe you should sit down.  Let me get you a glass of cold water.”

       I was now even more embarrassed
because Kelly was beginning to fuss over me me and I noticed that Rena now had
a concerned look on her face.  I had to nip this in the bud before I died of
embarrassment.

       "I'm fine, really.  I think
it's just a little bit warm in here for me that's all, I don't need any water
or anything.  I probably just should have eaten a little bit earlier than
now."

       "Okay, if you're sure that
you're okay then I'll leave it alone."

       I smiled at Kelly, she was always so
protective of me.  "Yes
mom
.  I'm fine."

       I glanced over in the corner where
Caleb had been standing, wondering if he had seen my friends fawning over me,
and he was nowhere to be found.  I was surprised at how disappointed I felt and
then I told myself it was just as well.  There was no way a guy like that would
look twice at me, he was way out of my league.  And besides, I saw the type of
girl that he likes because she was standing right in front of him, clearly a
zaftig girl like me was not his type.  He was probably just a huge flirt and I
was someone new so I probably just amused him for a few minutes.  I pushed him
out of my mind, determined to enjoy myself the rest of the night.

       Most of the people at the party were
in grad school at the Art Institute but I did meet a girl who was going to the
Chicago Portfolio School.  Marta was a really cool, super laid back girl who
wanted to eventually be a creative director.  We ended up talking for a while
because I was also interested in being a creative director down the line.

       “You know we have to start as junior
copyrighters, right?”

       She took a sip of her drink and then
nodded her head.  “Oh, yeah.  I just know that my ultimate goal is to be a
creative director one day.” 

       “I would love to be head of creative
one day.  Do you have any idea which advertising firm you would want to work
at?"

       "I would love to work at Ogilvy
& Mather, Digitas, or Leo Burnett.  How about you?"  She leaned
against the wall and took another sip of her drink as she waited for my answer.

       "Those three are at the top of
my list also, but my top pick of the three is Ogilvy & Mather.  I know that
we are going to have to start at the bottom but I am so willing to do whatever
I need to do to get my foot in the door at any of those places."

       "I know what you mean. I have
already done so much research on what they're looking for, and I am ready to
dive in and have a really good portfolio ready to show when it's interview time
in a year.  I can't wait to just get started with school so that I can get through
the year and land a job somewhere."

       "Yeah, me too.  Well, it's
getting late and I think I'm going to go find Kelly so that I can let her know
that I am ready to go home.  It was so nice to meet you Marta and I guess I
will see you at school on Monday!"

       "Yeah, nice to meet you too Emma. 
See you Monday!"        

       I walked around looking for Kelly to
let her know that I was ready to leave, and just as I rounded the corner to the
living room I crashed right into Caleb.  I was so caught off guard that I stood
there looking like an idiot as I stared up at him with eyes that were blinking
like crazy.

       He grabbed my arms to steady me and
searched my eyes as a smile slowly spread across his face.  “Where’s the fire?”
 That deep, sexy voice could melt the clothes right off of me.

      
Are you kidding me with that sexy
smile?
  He was unbelievably hot!  His smile made my knees weak as
attraction burned through my veins.  “I, I’m so sorry!”

       “Hey, it’s alright, no harm, no
foul!”  I could have sworn that his eyes twinkled at me when he said that.  And
as quickly as he had appeared in front of me, he disappeared.

       I could feel the disappointment
sweep over me as I realized that our encounter had come and gone in an
instant.  I had never been so attracted to a guy in my life, and if I was being
honest with myself, I knew that such a gorgeous guy had never looked my way. 
It made me feel good that Caleb had even given me a first glance. 
Oh Emma,
who are you kidding?  You saw that girl he was hanging all over in the kitchen!
 I had been feeling so good about my transformation the past couple of weeks
that I had almost forgotten the insecurity that I felt as the old me. But here
it was trying to rear its ugly head again.  I didn’t have time for those old
feelings of insecurity, I felt more confident about myself than I ever had.  I
know I looked good that night, so I pushed those negative thoughts out of my
mind.  My future was looking really bright and there was no room for insecurity
for this version of Emma.