NEVER GOODBYE (An Albany Boys Novel) (28 page)

I jump into his arms and he laughs with me and I know I will love this boy forever. I don’t realize I’m crying until he puts me down and strokes my cheek. April wraps her arms around me and she is bawling like a baby, which makes me cry more as we jump up and down, screaming. This isn’t just a chunk of money paid off our bills, this is a freedom I didn’t think I would have with my dad. We both shared a moment last night that changed us forever, bringing us closer. It seems like everything is finally,
finally
coming together. All I need now is to defeat Frankenstein and all will be peaches and cream.

April’s attention is diverted from me. What can possibly be more important than this moment? But then I see. Vaun is swerving between the chattering and celebrating crowd to a small mob surrounding his father. My heart is hammering. I’m sure Vaun had something to do with his father’s new position on me and my family, but the tension and volatile history between them has me a little on edge. I’m not alone in that either. April grips my hand and people part as he approaches his father, but he surprises us all. He always surprises me. His father puts his hand out to his son and my breath stutters just as Vaun leaps into a bear hug.

Vaun hugs his father like a loving son coming home. I cover the tiny whimper that comes and my feet take the steps to him like a zombie away from the support of April. The caring folk of Albany are a blur in my eyes. All I see is Vaun and his father. He may not need me, but I’ll be there for him. I will always be there for him because he is always there for me.

His father nods at me as Vaun turns, grinning so much that it melts my heart. Today is not just the beginning of new and good things for me, but for him too. I may be dying, I may be fighting, but he has to and, on some level, he was able to mend things long past because of our love.

“Hey babe.” Vaun grabs my hand and brings me into his wing where I feel safe and at home. “I know you met my dad already, but I want you to meet him again, like you should have.”

I know what he means but right now I’m not sure if I can ever forget the man I met that first day, despite his generosity to my family. What I can do is look at the man he is and what he’s done for me, for Vaun and for my family. I can forgive him, and that is way more than forgetting.

“Hello, Harper. I don’t expect you to be warm to me straight away after what I said to you and the terrible way I acted. I hope though, that this is the first step into redeeming myself in your eyes.” He holds his hand out and I don’t hesitate. I take his hand in mine and he holds it gently, like I might break, as he shakes it softly. His eyes are genuine and honest.

“You’re wrong, Mister Campbell. Right now, I actually want to hug you.”

He chuckles, a sound similar to that of his son’s, as he opens his arms for me. I hug him and whisper my thanks. He nods and grips me tight before I pull away, back into Vaun’s arms. When I glance up at Vaun I note for the first time a little crumb of pie he missed when cleaning himself up after the pie eating contest. I brush it off with my thumb and he gives me that look. The look that should not be used in front of his father and I feel the heat in my cheeks and look away. He laughs like the rat he is and I elbow him enough to interrupt it for a split second before he continues harder.
Rat.

“Come on, Blue. There is a big carnival and you’ve only seen a small part of it. Today you aren’t going to miss a thing and I want to show it all to you before the movie.”

“What’s the movie?” I ask as we wave goodbye to his Dad who nods his goodbye with a smile and turns to a group of men waiting for him. I like that; they waited without interruption or obvious stares while a father connected with his son’s girlfriend.

“I’ve seen it a few times now, it’s an old one, but pretty cool.
The Goonies
. Have you seen it?”

“Ah, no.” It sounds weird, yet if he says it’s cool, then I believe him. “What’s it about?”

“All I can say is it’s every kids rite of passage to see this movie. It’s about kids owning their own time. It will be good for you and good for Benny. Just wait and see.”

“So it’s one of those life lessons, moral-type movies.” I say it laced with sarcasm and disdain like a brat, I know, but time is precious and I don’t really want to be stuck watching some old movie I don’t like when I could be back in that tent with Vaun.

He smirks and shakes his head. “You will regret the thoughts you’re having right now. Just wait and see.”  He thumbs my lip, tempting me to suck on it, and my body reacts. I can tell he sees it and he freezes, his thumb braces on my chin where it grazes down my neck.

“Blue. Don’t look at me like that.”

“I can’t help how I look as much as you can.”

He licks his lips and I feel like I’m possessed by some horn dog the way he keeps making me feel. The way he takes possession of my body is insane and scary.

“How about for now we agree to look away from each other and regroup by the cotton candy machine in ten minutes.”

He’s right, but I don’t want to leave him. I sound like a possessive, whiney girlfriend and I hate that, so I nod and I turn away from him and I head for the ladies to
regroup
myself.

I want to turn and see him, see if he is waiting for me to turn, but I won’t. I can’t. If I turn, I’ll keep turning right back into his arms. So I keep my feet moving, I keep breathing and I count each step I take before reaching the line of port-a-potties and washing stations, where a small girl is talking to her mother through one of the doors. Turning to the sink I pump the water and splash it over my face, not caring if the small amount of makeup I have on runs. I need to cool down.

The water doesn’t really help, though. The kid asking her mom if she needs to poop and I hold back my laughter as the mother tells her child to not ask questions like that in a hushed tone. I wonder if I did that to my mom. I walk over to the tilt truck beside the line of potties and gaze into the mirror, not really seeing myself, but seeing her, my mom. I’ve seen countless pictures of her at this age and we look alike. Another reason my dad finds it hard to be around me I guess.

Taking a huge breath I turn back, take some paper towel, blot my face and head back out, scanning the crowd for anyone recognizable. It’s not hard to spot Footy and Vaun, who is obviously looking for me. He finds my eyes straight away and I can tell that whatever he used to regroup himself didn’t work.

Vaun meets me and we are like the only two people amongst the falling rain of voices and movement. He smiles and that’s all I need. I take his hand in mine, looking at the vast difference in size and color.

“Beauty and the beast,” he says and I scoff.

“New girl and the town moron.” Vaun laughs. This is the Vaun I love and prefer. “Come on, cowboy. Show me a good time.”

***

The credits are rolling and my cheeks are so sore from smiling and laughing through the entire movie.
The Goonies
has to be the best movie I’ve ever seen in my whole life. It could have been the fact that a group of kids were the heroes of a town that lost hope. It could have been the constant comedy and light-heartedness of every character. Maybe it was the budding young romance between two people from opposite sides of the social ladder, or the kid who couldn’t say booby-trap without it sounding like ‘boody trap’. It was all those things, but it was especially because I was here with Vaun and I will never forget the way he and Benny schemed their own booby-traps against April. Benny had taken some serious notes it seems.

The crowd is clapping, as am I while people are gathering their blankets, chairs, coolers and children ready to go home. Vaun gathers our stuff, handing Benny our blanket. Our red blanket. I have no idea where April Carter are, they left awhile after the group. I guess the movie wasn’t their thing.

“Harper, we
have
to buy that movie. It was the bomb.” Benny is jumping up and down in front of me and I laugh.

“Abso-freaking-lutely. We can order it in the morning or get it during the week before I go in for treatment.”

I knew as soon as I said it I had placed a big wet blanket on Benny’s mood and could have kicked myself for it. “Come on, little brother. If the Goonies can save a town together, we can take out Frankenstein together no problem.”

He smiles a little, but behind him Vaun winces. He knows better than that. Making light of this disease just isn’t in him but, for me and Benny, it’s our coping mechanism. I don’t know what will help Vaun, but I know I must remain optimistic. He needs it more than I do, I think. I have faith in God, or whoever you believe is up there making plans for us all, and it helps me believe that I’m going to make it. Unfortunately, Vaun lost his. I just hope that he might regain some of his faith through our love because otherwise … no, I can’t think like that.

“Vaun, Benny.” They look at me and I take a huge breath, “I love you.”

Benny scrunches his face a little and looks around, probably for any of his friends listening. Satisfied he is safe from embarrassment, he smiles. “I know. I love you, too.”

Vaun scruffs Ben’s hair and walks past him to my side, leaning in to my ear. “No one will love you like I love you.”

My heart thuds hard at his words and I turn so my mouth is a whisper from his. I look into his eyes, not doubting one word he said because I feel the same. I might be young, we might be young, but we’ve been through more growing up then most adults and the desperate love I feel aching inside me for him is mirrored in those eyes. He says I’ll never know love like his; he’s right and I will never feel this love for another for as long as I live.

“I’m hungry,” Benny whines, “Can we get more pie?” Both Vaun and I look over to him, broken from the trance we seem to fall into whenever we are close. That’s what April calls it, a trance. She’s caught us at school and at home a few times and she’s not the only one. She’s just the only one who’s said anything about it to me.

“Dude, I love pie, but I don’t want to face another one for at least twenty-four-hours,” Vaun recovering flawlessly, rubbing his stomach making me laugh.

“I could eat pie forever,” Benny grins. “We didn’t get pie in Seattle, unless you count McDonalds.”

“No, never count McDonalds, bro. Never.” Vaun shakes his head and although one arm is full of our gear he wraps the other around Benny and leads him through the crowd toward his truck. “We need to have a serious chat on where it’s appropriate to buy pie. Rule number one- No chains or franchises …”

I’m left chuckling to myself in tow. Benny is my savior, he can bring light and fun into every moment of my life but, like a double edge sword, he can bring a halt to a moment like a horn from a freight train in a monastery.

All the way home the two of them discuss all you could ever know about good American pie. I think I could take on Betty Crocker. But of course their repartee doesn’t stop there. When we get home it’s like spy camp. The two of them are scavenging supplies and making in-depth plans on how they were going to get April over here tomorrow and ‘take her out’. Their words, not mine.

I think those two boys, if they’re successful, will have a heavy price to pay afterward. I feel for them. I could stop them, I could warn April, but I think this is something I should let them play out together and, if I’m honest with myself at all, I admit that I’m a little excited to see what happens. I’m excited because for the first time in my life that I can remember, I feel like I’m in a place where I know I have people to count on, I feel like I’m home.

Vaun

              Today would have to be to best damn day of my life. Everything is coming round full circle. I had a damn good life until my mom got sick and then it all went to shit. I mean everything. My relationship with my dad, my friends, my world, all of it was a shit sandwich without the bread. Right up until I saw a girl dance across a stage. That was the day my world lit up and became something to live for again.

              A couple of times I was scared I wouldn’t make it and I would never, ever tell anyone that. They see a tough kid who had a rough time. They don’t see the pain and loneliness, the inner desire to leave this world that had forsaken me.

              I could put all these thoughts behind me, but I know it’s safer to keep them at the surface because it reminds me of what could happen if I mess this all up. The unfortunate thing is that I have moments when I realize that despite us doing everything we can, it might not be enough for her to win the fight. That right there is out of our hands. If it takes her, there’s no amount of money, great times and Cherry bars that will matter because it can’t bring her back and I can’t live without her.

              “Blue?”

              “Yeah?” she breathes sluggishly. We’re in the tent again. She asked and I gave. That’s how we roll, I guess. Although I’m a bit afraid she’s going to want to move in here and, if she makes it, we’re gonna have our babies in here.

              “What do you dream about?”

              She’s silent for a bit and if I didn’t see her tiny smile and the twitch in her lids, I’d think she fell asleep.

              “I dream potato power could one day solve the world’s energy crisis.”

              The laughter that busts from me takes my breath away. She’s rolls to her side laughing too, but no way as hard as me.

              “I never really understood potato power. Explain it to me.” I vaguely recall a science show on TV as a kid, but I’m totally busting to see if she actually knows about potato power or is just being a smart ass.

              She bites her lip and I groan, but she doesn’t know why ‘cause I know she isn’t even aware she’s doing it half the time. It’s not her fault that I’m a possessed animal who thinks of only one thing when she looks sexy. Which is all the fracking time.

              “Fine. I confess. I know nothing of how potato power works. I just saw it on a show once. Damndest thing, powering a clock with a couple of wires and a spud―damndest freaking thing in the world.”