Next to Forever (Never Letting Go) (20 page)

I try
to get Erin to come back but she runs out of the house before I could say anything.

“Erin! Stop!” She jumps in her car and looks at me before pulling out of the driveway.
“Erin!”
I scream out, but she’s gone.

Doctor Burns comes outside and pats my back. “Come inside, I want to show you what I’m talking about.”

We head back inside, and he shows me the medicine bottle and notes about mifepristone. I read the notes and I feel my fists clench. I pick up the bottle and throw it across the room. “Are you fucking serious?” I walk away and punch the wall causing a hole, and my hand starts throbbing. “Why?”

“I don’t know. I asked myself the same questions.
Vander hasn’t been at the house because he’s been busy moving and working. When Sarah found this, I put two in two together. I went back to the hospital and looked at the lab work but couldn’t find anything. It was as if Erin didn’t have any blood tests which are false.”

My head is swimming with this information. I grab my phone and call Erin but it goes to her voicemail. I call her
repeatedly but no response. I text Adam and tell him and Sophia to come over now. If I find Vander, I’m going to fucking kill him. Doctor Burns starts talking again but I don’t hear anything he’s saying. All I can think about is Erin and wonder where the fuck she is, and why she didn’t stay and listen.

Adam and Sophia make their way over and I tell them everything.

“You’re kidding me?” She touches her stomach and looks at Adam. “I knew something was off about him. Honey, you remember when I told you what Vander did, right?”

Adam looks at the pill bottle and papers. His face goes pale and he crumples the papers. “Vander tried giving Soph this tea and told her that it’d make her feel better
, but she never drank it.” Adam brings Sophia to his lap and presses his face to her neck.

“Daddy, why would he do this?”

Doctor Burns shakes his head. “I don’t know, baby. I wish I had the answers but nothing is making sense to me either.”

“Where’s Vander now? Adam gets up and grabs a beer from the refrigerator. “I don’t get this shit. What
is his issue with all of us?

Nothing’s making sense
, and Erin’s still not answering her phone. Adam hops on the computer and tries to find more information about Vander but nothing comes up. It’s as if he doesn’t exist. I take out my phone again and check to see if Erin called or texted but there’s nothing.

Me: Baby, where are you? Please come home.

I wait and there’s nothing. Sophia goes over to Adam and helps him while Doctor Burns makes a few calls. I can’t sit here and wait around so I grab my keys and head out to find Erin but then the door opens and Olivia comes in with Erin.

“Erin? Olivia? What the hell happened?” Olivia brings Erin to the couch and I smell alcohol on her.

Sophia comes over and kneels beside Erin. We grab a towel and put it under warm water. I run back to Erin and put the towel on her head. Olivia sits on the floor and pulls up her knees. “I found her at the bar. She was a mess and kept saying a lot of weird things.”

“What was she saying?” I get on the couch and place her head on my lap. My beautiful girl. I’m sorry that you’re going through this
, and I wish I could take away your pain. Please be okay.

“She kept saying
‘Aria’ and crying into her alcohol.” Olivia looks at us and Sophia gives her a hug.

“Thanks for taking care of her, Olivia. It means a lot to us.”

The rest of the night is quiet. Everyone heads home, and Erin’s still sleeping on my lap. I watch her chest rise and fall, and I’m glad she’s back home but a part of me is nervous about leaving her alone. Leaving the hospital, knowing Aria is gone, broke us both. Watching Erin fall a part day-by-day kills me, and I feel helpless. That day, a piece of both of us died. Doctor Taylor is doing her best, we all are, but nothing seems to be working. I don’t know how else to get through to her, but when she wakes up, I’m going to make her understand. I lean my head back and my eyelids feel heavy. After a long while, I pick Erin up and bring her upstairs.

There are pictures of Aria on the nightstand.
I pick up each picture and look at her—our baby girl.

Pain.

Despair.

Anguish.

Broke.

All of these emotions run through me. I can’t take it anymore
, and silently, I fall to the ground, holding her pictures close to my heart. “Daddy’s sorry, Aria. I’ll always love you.”

The next morning, I wake up and Erin’s at the kitchen table reading the notes and looking at the pill bottle. I rub my eyes and let out a yawn before heading over to her.

“How are you feeling?” I kiss the top of her head.

“I’m not sure how I feel about all of this.” Erin puts down the papers and looks at the bottle. “I told him so much
, and he knew how excited I was about Aria. Why would he do this?” Erin looks at me and tries to understand and find answers, but nothing makes sense, and I don’t know what else to tell her.

Before I can say anything, her phone vibrates. We look at her phone and notice it’s a text from Vander.

Vander: Hey, baby girl. How are you today? Wanna grab lunch? You, Soph, & me?

Erin looks at me and I give her a nod to let her know it’s okay to text him back.

Me: Not today, hun. Not feeling up to it. Rain check?

Vander:
Sure... But you have to come over to the new house soon and help me decorate!

“So what do I do? Just keep avoiding him?”

I bring her on my lap and hold her tight. “We’ll figure out something.”

* * * * *

November came and went. It’s been a roller coaster of emotions, but we’re taking it day by day. Erin and I have been spending time together and seeing Doctor Taylor. The nights are the worst and her nightmares aren’t going away. Each night I hold her in my arms and tell her it’ll be okay, and slowly, it gets better.

I finish making plans for our vacation. I let Adam know about our plans
, and he says with the California deal sealed and confirmed, everything will be pretty slow. Everyone’s still looking for Vander and no one has answers. He disappeared without a trace and the house he bought is still empty. I tell Erin to stop worrying about it and to let it go.

We finish packing
, and Erin keeps asking me where we’re going but I’m not telling her anything. A smirk comes on my face as I bring her in my arms.

“You’re adorable
, you know that?”

She cocks her head to the side and makes a duck face. Out of all the girls that do it, Erin makes the duck face look hot and sexy. “You may have told me a few times.” She wiggles out of my arms
, and I smack her ass. God, I can’t wait to get out of here for a few days and relax.

It's been hard, but Erin seems to be more accepting of what happened to Aria.
It’s still hard for her to sleep at night, and the nightmares are still there but together we’re strong, and I know we’ll get through this.

We lock up and head out to our limo, and our
driver puts our luggage in the trunk, and we slide inside the sleek black limo. Erin places her head on my shoulder and lets out a sigh.

I rub small circles on her arm
, and we talk about the past few months. In about thirty minutes, we’re at the airport and the jet is ready for us. We climb on board and are greeted by the flight staff. Everyone makes us comfortable, and Erin and I take our seats.

“Ready, baby?”

She puts on her seatbelt and looks out the window. I love seeing her smile and happy. She claps her hands and looks at me again. “Babe! I’m so excited. I don’t even care where we go as long as we’re together, that’s all that matters to me.” She kisses me and cradles my face with her hand. “I love you. So much.”

“I love you
, too.” We listen to the flight attendant and prepare for take off. When it’s just the both of us, I peek in the back and see the empty room. “You know,” I start to say, placing my hand on her thigh, “we’ve never flown together before.” I eye the back room and back toward Erin.

“Connor!” She whispers but sees my hand on her. I slide it up and down and make my way down to my favorite place. She leans her head back and closes her eyes. I love it when she whimpers. I know she wants this
, and she’ll give in soon. I massage her through her yoga pants and lean in to nibble her neck. Her favorite place. “Okay! Let’s go.”

We leave our seats and go to the back room. There’s a full size bed and a loveseat in the corner. It’s a simple room but is more than enough to get some things done. Erin closes and locks the door. I pull her
toward me and slowly pull down her yoga pants. I can smell her arousal and feel how ready she is for me. I reach down and pull her thong off. I guide her to the bed and she lays down with her legs slightly spread open for me.

I position myself between her open legs and my lips kiss both of her inner thighs. “Do you want me to make you feel better, baby?” I run my fingers along her wet folds and hear her moaning my name. “
Mmmm, I think you do want me to make you feel better.”

“God, yes
, Connor. Please!”

“Shhhhh,” I say, kissing her beautiful spot and making her squirm between my lips. Her body trembles as I flick her clit with my tongue and suck her wetness. I love tasting my girl
. I can do it for hours. I push my tongue deep inside her and feel her bucking underneath me.

“Keep. Going. Connor. Oh, God.”

“Come in my mouth, Erin.” I move my tongue in and out of her faster and suck on her clit. I flick it a few times and push my fingers inside her. She’s so wet and I love sucking her.

“Don’t. Stop!” I feel her trembling and know she’s about to come.

“Mmmm, baby, come. Now!”

“Ahhhh!” Erin comes in my mouth and I suck her tasty juices. Feeling my dick pulsating against my sweat pants
, I get up from the floor, pull down my sweats, and jam into her before she closes her legs. “Connor,” she screams. I grab her hips and pull her down so I can go deeper into her. “Yes, yes! Harder, fuck me harder, Connor.”

“God, you feel so good
, baby.” My balls slap against her as I thrust harder into her while playing with her clit.

In a few seconds, we find
our release, and we start laughing from the incredible sex.

“You’re so bad but I love it.”

I kiss her lips and hear her giggle. “You’re amazing. I hope you know that.”

“Of course I do.” I kiss her again but keep the smile on my
face. God, I love her.

After a few hours, we make it to paradise. I gently shake Erin and kiss her on the lips to wake her up. She slowly opens her eyes and looks out the window.

“Connor? Oh my God! St. Lucia!?” Erin bounces in her seat and a smile creeps on my face. She’s finally happy again, and I can’t wait to keep that beautiful smile on her face.

Once we land and our luggage is transferred to our limo, we start the drive to our resort
—Sandals Regency La Toc Golf Resort & Spa. I look at my watch, and it’s almost two in the afternoon. Our massages are scheduled for later this afternoon and then dinner at Pitons Restaurant. Erin takes out her phone and lowers the window to take pictures. I text Adam and let him know we’re here safely and to see if there are any updates on Vander.

Adam: We have the security team on it but nothing. He’s gone. The hospital hasn’t seen him and we found his car on the side of the road. I doubt that asshole is dead or hurt
, but I wouldn’t give a shit if that were the case.

Me: Keep me updated.

Adam: Oh, just wanted to say thank you for having a one-night stand with Olivia and getting her pregnant then paying her off.

Me: ?

Adam: She’s Soph’s new best friend. FML.

Me: She’s not that bad anymore
, so it’ll be fine. She needs friends and it’s great that Soph can look past her unique qualities.

Adam: Yeah. Great.

Me: Don’t have too much fun!

Adam: Hilarious.

Me: LOL have fun.

Adam: Yeah, great times. Haha.
All right, man, well, have fun and I’ll see you next week.

Me:
All right, ttyl.

“Connor, look!”

The resort is coming into view and the sight is amazing. “Baby,” I lean into her neck, kissing her. “This is where we’re staying.”

“Shut the front door! OH MY GOD!”

The limo pulls into the resort, our luggage is being loaded onto the cart as Erin and I go inside and check-in. The lobby is a contemporary style room with couches and a high-rise ceiling. There are people all over, checking-in and walking around. Erin grabs my hand and smiles. We wait in line ready to check-in into our ocean view room. It would’ve been nice to get the honeymoon suite but I didn’t want Erin to freak out, so this room will be fine. The two-story suite includes everything we need for this trip, so Erin can relax and forget about what’s going on at home.