Nic's Devotion: An Endless Series: Book One (44 page)

     I can’t believe I let myself get carried away. I’d been
so damn horny for her and being with her was so amazing that I’d let the fact
that it had been her first time slip my mind. Now she was going to pay for it.

     Carrie’s face was beet red. “That didn’t hurt. It’s
just…” Her gaze tracked away from mine…“I’m sort of leaking.”

     Shit, that didn’t sound good. “You’re still bleeding?”
I asked in alarm. I thought girls just bled a little.

     Carrie shook her head. “No…it’s not from me.” She
glanced up at me self-consciously.

     And I immediately knew what the problem was. I’d filled
her up so completely with my spunk that it was dripping out of her. Hell, it
was probably flowing out of her. I felt like I’d given her half my body fluids
each time I’d come. Just the thought of it had me grinning.

     Carrie’s eyes narrowed. That was more like it. I didn’t
like seeing her self-conscious. “You don’t have to look so…so smug about it.”
She pursed her lips but there was a definite curl to one side telling me she
was finding it kind of funny. 

     I pulled her into my arms and lifted her up so her face
was level with mine. Her eyes went wide in dismay and I felt a drop of
something wet hit my bare foot.

     “Oh no.” She said sounding mortified.

     I just smiled in satisfaction. “I love that you’re
overflowing with me. It’s like I’ve marked you as mine.” I captured her
surprised mouth for a hard kiss before setting her back down. “When I hear that
bath going I’m coming back in.” I warned her as I turned to walk out. Pulling the
door closed behind me I heard a whispered ‘
Neanderthal’
as it latched
and my smile widened. Such a firecracker.

     The sink turned on telling me that Carrie was probably
going to the bathroom…I’d already picked up on that she didn’t want me hearing
her piss. Whether this was a Carrie thing or a girl thing I wasn’t sure. After
about three minutes I heard the bathtub start and thought I’d give her another
couple more minutes to get settled.

     As I waited I checked my phone for any texts and found
that my dad had left me one. The only thing it said was,
‘I told you what
would happen’.
I hadn’t spoken to him since he’d threatened me concerning
Carrie, but I knew right away what the text meant. A reporter at the game
yesterday had brought up my pre-game conduct saying that my and Carrie’s kiss
had been uploaded onto the school’s website already with the caption
‘Star
player kisses fan in stand before game’
.

     The reporter had asked who it was I had been kissing. I
had debated on what to tell her because I didn’t want Carrie to have to worry
about being exposed, but I also didn’t want it to seem like she wasn’t
important to me. So all I’d confirmed was that she was my girlfriend and that
she’d surprised me by being at the game. I hadn’t named her, but I wouldn’t be
surprised if the reporter found out her name and ran a more in-depth article.

     What was being said or written was the crucial
question.

     The bathtub water was still running so I went to my
laptop and punched in my and Carrie’s full names. A dozen articles popped up,
but there was one that concerned both Carrie and me. A local paper had run an
article this morning about my outstanding performance this season and even gone
back to mention the past two championships years.

     It was a fantastic piece of exposure for me that I
would have been excited over if it hadn’t also gone into depth about Carrie and
her background. It looked like they’d rewritten the shoddy information located
on the internet, the same stuff Nikki had first found. It basically said that
there had been an altercation in the family home and that Carrie had attacked
her father killing him and then been sent to a hospital for psychological
treatment with none of the essential details of what had really taken place.

     Son of a fucking bitch! This was what Carrie had feared
would happen. She had worried that her negative publicity would attach itself
to my name. I didn’t give a shit about that, but I knew she would. What I did
care about was how she was going to handle her name being bandied about in the
news and if this might cause her to have another attack, an even worse one?
She’d just gotten out of the hospital. What if this sent her right back, and
for an even longer period of time than before?

     Fuck! If only I hadn’t kissed her in front of the
entire stadium…but I had been so damn happy to see her I hadn’t been thinking,
and with the way she’d set it up and greeted me I don’t think she’d been
thinking about it either.

     Well, that ship had sailed, now we needed to deal with
the aftermath. If it had been possible I wouldn’t even tell Carrie about the
article, but there was no way to hide it. Anyone could come up to her and shove
it in her face. She needed to be forewarned so she wasn’t surprised.

     Closing down the computer I walked toward the bathroom
with a heavy heart wondering how Carrie would receive what I had to tell her.
However, my thoughts blanked momentarily as I opened the door and saw the
vision before me.

     Carrie was lying back in the tub her body submerged in
water with only the tips of her breasts peeking up out. The ends of her hair
floated around them giving me small glimpses of her plump mounds and perky
peaks. She hadn’t heard me open the door over the running water; her head
remained tilted back against the tiled wall, eyes closed in relaxation,
beautiful face serene.

     I stood there enjoying the sight for a moment before silently
closing the door and walking toward the tub. Crouching down I slipped my hand
into the water and smoothed it over her stomach. She jerked in surprise eyes
flying open, but she calmed at once at the sight of me.

     Slipping a little deeper into the tub, I assume for
more coverage, she gave me a sweet smile. “Hey.”

     I quirked a brow. “You wouldn’t by chance have room in
there for me, would you?”

     The flush on her face from the heat of the water turned
even rosier. She did arch a brow at me playfully though. “I don’t know…you’re
awfully large. Do you think you’ll fit?”

     She wasn’t trying to be sexual but that statement was
too good to pass up. “I like tight fits.” I replied huskily, skimming my hand
down over her sex so she wouldn’t miss my innuendo, and there went her face
getting even redder. “Scoot forward a bit.”

     Turning off the water I stood up dropping the towel and
slid carefully into the
very
hot water arranging her between my legs.
Her wet black hair plastered itself instantly to my chest. I grabbed some soap
and caressed it over her arms, stomach, and breasts and she slowly relaxed back
against me. My cock swelled but I ignored it even though it was a little hard
to overlook the stiff pipe smashed between our bodies.

     “Can you tell me about your time in the hospital?”

     Carrie sighed and her hands stroked over my thighs,
which didn’t help my already stimulated senses. “You’re wondering why I could
let you lay on top of me?”

     “Yes.” I answered simply.

     “Mona put me through some intense therapy for my
anxiety of being confined. She put heavy blankets on me that would get heavier
each night. She would talk with me until I was comfortable and then leave me
alone. It was difficult at first but I gradually became accustomed to it. Most
of my anxiety was stemming from not dealing with my father’s actions though.”

     I forced my body to stay lax but my eyes widened as
Carrie spoke of her father. She was never able to speak about him without some
difficulty. “What do you mean?” I asked curiously.

     “When I was in the hospital previously I hadn’t fully
dealt with what my father had tried to do to me. I sort of pushed it to the
back recesses of my mind. This time I actually talked about it with Mona.” She
absently moved her hands over me as she talked. “For some reason I blocked my
father completely from my memories. I couldn’t even recall what he was like
from my childhood. However, these last four weeks I had a breakthrough in my
memories. I remember an attentive father, someone who spent time with me. I
don’t
recall any incidents of him touching me inappropriately before that night.”

     I heard a childlike tone to her voice, a sort of hope
that what she remembered to be true was actually the truth. It broke my heart,
her hope. It also made me all that more angry toward her father and I had to
consciously keep my hands from tensing on her arms and shoulders as I washed
her.

     Carrie continued in a sadly bewildered tone. “I have
memories of loving my father and of him loving me. They’ve told me about his
internet child pornography and I have this notion that he was a man afflicted with
this…problem but tried his best to not succumb to it. He was drunk the night he
attacked me and I have to wonder if that might be the reason why he did it,
because he wasn’t entirely himself.”

     Damn, she was killing me. I didn’t give a fuck what her
father’s reasons were. All I cared about was how it affected her. It being her
father I could see how she would make excuses for him, but how was this
affecting her mind-set on protecting herself by killing him? Would she put more
blame upon herself? It wasn’t something I would allow her to do. 

     I wrapped my arms around her tightly and kissed the top
of her head. “What was in your father’s head no one will ever know, but if what
you’re thinking is true and he loved you, than he would have wanted you to
protect yourself. Even from him.” I stated strongly.

     She sighed sorrowfully. “Yes, that’s the same thing
Mona said, and I believe it’s something easy to say. It’s the same thing I
would tell another in my place, but I also know it’s something I will have to
come to grips with in time.”

     Damn, her fortitude was remarkable. “And I will be
there next to you the whole time.” I vowed.

     Carrie turned to look at me, her gaze bright. “You are
always there for me. I want to be that same strong post for you.” She leaned
forward to press a soft kiss against my lips. “I love you.”

     My chest constricted. “I love you too.” I returned her
kiss a little harder running my hand down her side and then back up to cup her
breast. I was getting a tad too excited so I broke the kiss. I still needed to
talk to her about that article. 

     I settled her back against my chest and went back to
soaping her. “There’s something I need to tell you. When we shared that kiss in
front of the entire stadium…well, it was put up on the universities website.”
She stiffened and I knew I couldn’t tell this to the back of her head. I turned
her around in my lap so she straddled me. Her expression showed surprise at my
abrupt arrangement of her person. My stiff cock lay sandwiched between our
abdomens and her breasts pressed into my chest, but I ignored them pulling her
tighter into my embrace. “Moreover, because of that kiss a reporter asked me
who you were.”

     Carrie’s eyes widened and the dread in them was easy to
see. “What did you say?”

     I rubbed her shoulders in comfort. “I only told her you
were my girlfriend.” Her alarmed expression started to ease. “But, she found
out your name and when she wrote the article she named you…” Damn, I hated to
have to tell her this, especially as her face was already white in distress.
“…and she found your story online citing it in her article.”

     “Oh, my god.”

     I watched her breathing carefully in case she had an
attack. It appeared steady, but the acute dismay on her face caused my heart to
clench. Seeing her upset set my teeth on edge.

     “I’m so sorry, Nic. I was afraid that this might
happen. Is this going to cause big problems for you? I can step out of the
picture if you need me to.”

     Carrie rambled on apologizing and I just stared at her in
astonishment. She was upset about possibly causing
me
problems. What the
Hell! She didn’t seem to care at all that everyone was finding out her past.

     “You need to stop that shit right now.” Carrie’s mouth
froze in an ‘O’ and her eyes widened in surprise. As a rule I tried not to
swear in front of her, but she needed to stop thinking the shit she was
thinking. “I love you and there is no way you’re stepping back from us. I’m not
worried about me. I told you your past won’t cause me any harm, but I am
concerned about you. Four weeks ago you had a severe panic attack because your
past was exposed in front of a crowd of people. I don’t want you to have to go
through that again.”

     Closing her eyes she sighed and leaning forward laying
her head on my shoulder. I closed my eyes as the wet glide of her stomach on my
hard dick sent a jagged arrow of pleasure to my balls. “I will be fine as long
as there’s no fall out on you. I’ve finally come to terms with my
past…mostly…and I don’t think…at least I’m pretty sure I’m over freaking out
just because someone mentions my father or what happened to me.”

     Gliding my hands up her wet back I took enjoyment in
the silkiness of her skin. If what she was saying was true than I was extremely
relieved for her, I never wanted to see her have another panic attack in my
life, but I wasn’t happy that she might have to deal with the jerk wads out
there who might give her shit about her past. It wasn’t going to be pleasant
for her to deal with the comments and rumors, and the stress of coping with
said jerk wads could possibly push her into an episode.

     “I can assure you that your past will not affect
lacrosse, and if it did I would choose you over it any day.” I said meaning
every word. Lacrosse had been my whole life before Carrie, but after having
been without her for a month I can honestly say that she was more
important…hands down.