Old Sins Long Shadows (41 page)

‘
I have not travelled further than two miles outside this ‘ere village and don’t intend to start now!’ she had told them and nothing Janey or Molly could say would change her mind. However, their own successful participation had resulted in them both passing a dairy certificate which Janey proudly showed the man standing before her.

‘
The cheese samples we have are from our mild cheese range,’ said Janey, laying out her samples. ‘They are both made from South Devon cattle which produce rich creamy milk. We will be able to produce medium and mature cheeses over time. It’s the age of the cheese that determines the maturity, as I’m sure you know.’

The shop
keeper nodded, assuring Janey he knew how cheese was made, although Daniel was not convinced he did. The shopkeeper took a sample of butter, moving it about his mouth to taste the full flavour. He then reached for a sample of cheese and took a bite. He took his time as he savoured it on his tongue. Daniel and Janey held their breath.

 
‘They are very good,’ said the shopkeeper, taking another sample of the cheese, ‘It melts in the mouth.’  Janey smiled and released the breath she had been holding.

‘
So you will be happy to sell our cheese and butter in your shop?’

‘
Now I didn’t say that. Mrs Tholly makes my cheese and Hawkens makes the butter. The locals are used to their products,’ he said glancing sheepishly at Daniel. Janey couldn’t believe what she was hearing, or rather what he wasn’t saying. The shopkeeper did not want to do business with Daniel Kellow, despite the cheese and butter being a far superior product to the ones he sold at present. From the look on Daniel’s face he was thinking the same.

‘
Mr Jones, our cheese and butter taste better than any I have tasted for a very long time. I’m sure the villagers would prefer to buy ours.’

‘
That is your opinion.’  Arthur Jones got up to leave. As far as he was concerned the meeting was over.

‘
Mr Jones,’ Daniel had stood up too and was addressing him. Expecting trouble, Arthur squared up to him. ‘I understand you are wary of doing business with me, sir. If I was in your shoes I would feel the same.’ The shopkeeper eyed him suspiciously. He had never had cause to be in conversation with the man that stood before him now and he was a little taken aback by how reasonable he sounded. ‘I know I have a lot to prove, but I feel that the product we are producing is far superior to anything available in this area at the moment. We plan to sell to St. Mabe, Port Wella, Bodmin and Wadebridge in the coming months, however we wanted the local village shop to be the first to have an option to buy and to offer you privileges the other shops will not have.’

‘
Privileges you say?  Such as?’ Daniel had got Arthur’s attention.

‘
Such as a short notice order delivery privilege and a ten percent discount. As our first buyer you are important to us.’  Janey looked at Daniel and felt pride surge through her. He was talking to the shopkeeper as if he had been doing negotiations for years, but Arthur still looked doubtful. ‘You still seem unsure. I am willing to provide the first block of cheese free and you will have one hundred percent profit from the sales. When it is a success, which I have no doubt it will be, will you do business with us?’

‘
A free block of cheese and a ten percent discount on all future orders?’

‘
Yes, Mr Jones. I give you my word our products will remain pure, with no bulking additives and our deliveries will be reliable. As our first customer you will always be special to us.’  Arthur thought for some moments, taking the opportunity to take another sample of cheese in his mouth.

‘
Of course, Mr Kellow, you know as well as I do it will sell before the week is out.’

‘
I have no doubt it will, Mr Jones.’  The shopkeeper nodded in resignation.

‘
I believe we have a deal,’ he said, offering his hand. The deal was confirmed with a firm handshake.

As a
young woman Janey always thought she would fall in love in a romantic setting, perhaps watching the red sky of a perfect sunset with the man of her dreams or swaying to the sound of a waltz in the arms of her lover. She never envisaged that she would discover she was in love in a crowded little shop with the smell of cheese filling her nostrils. She watched Daniel’s lips move as he continued to make conversation with the shopkeeper but she no longer heard his words. It seemed every day she was seeing a side of Daniel she did not know existed. Today she saw the businessman. Daniel, the serious, stubborn and aloof man who had dipped in and out of her life over the past two years, had today conducted himself in a polite, self assured manner. His behaviour had been akin to a gentleman. She wondered how long she had been in love with him. The truth of the matter was she simply didn’t know. She did know, however, with a certainty that she would stake her own life on, that in the dimly lit shop, surrounded by sacks of flour and holding cheese samples in her hand, she had fallen in love with her husband and it felt glorious.

Edna turned the handle of the mangle as Janey carefully threaded the wet clothes through the wooden rollers. There was something rewarding about seeing the water squeezed out of the washing and drip into the bucket below. Janey was approaching her eighth month. She was beginning to tire and Daniel had insisted on taking on extra help in the dairy as orders were beginning to build. The first batch of cheeses were nearly mature and ready for delivery but the shops who were willing to sell them had also expressed an interest in their butter samples. The first Kellow butter was delivered to the outlets last week with a resounding success and the cheese and butter making was becoming a full time job. So when Daniel arrived with two of Matt’s younger sisters, Janey couldn’t help feeling a little relieved. While they did most of the work, she and Edna supervised, tested for quality and prepared the orders. Daniel and David then made the deliveries. It was a small business but one that was fast growing a good reputation for reliability and quality. Daniel soon realised that, if it continued to grow at the same rate, they would need more land to accommodate a bigger herd.

Edna and Janey chatted about the success of the business as they worked, resting now and then to take a drink from the water th
ey had drawn from the well before returning to the laundry pile. Edna had begun to look upon Janey like the daughter she never had and told her just that.

 
‘Edna, that’s a lovely thing to say and you have become more of a mother to me than my own.’  The old woman paused in her turning. ‘It’s true. I’ve always felt like she has resented my existence.’

‘
Shame on your mam for making you feel that way.’

‘
She did.’ Janey gave her baby inside her a protective stroke. ‘I worry that Daniel will resent this little one.’

‘
Resent?’ Edna enquired, then immediately chose not to pursue her meaning further. Instead she said, ‘No, maid, ’e wouldn’t do that. Daniel’s been ’ankering after a family for years, although ’e may not admit to it. In fact look at us lot. He didn’t ’ave to take on Molly but ’e did. David and Molly are like ’is younger brother and sister and think of themselves as such. He tolerates me,’ Janey tried to protest at the word “tolerate” but Edna would have none of it. ‘I know folk think I’m strange but truth is - I was lonely. Daniel let me into ’is life and I look upon ’im as a son and I ’ope he sees me as a mother figure. Of course, ’e’s now got ’imself a pretty wife and soon a child. He’s not going to resent ’aving ’is own flesh and blood in ’is life.’  Janey bit her lip, holding back a confession that the baby was not his.

Instead she said,
‘I also worry about giving birth. What if something goes wrong?’

‘
Things do go wrong, there’s no doubt about that. I carried all my babies for the first four months but after that date they would start to slip away from me. None lived past seven months. But you ’ave good child bearing ’ips and your time is nearly ’ere. We have Bertha in the village, she delivers all the babies around ’ere and then there’s the doctor nearby who lives in the big house at the bottom of the ’ill. There’s ’elp at ’and.’

‘
Did you have Bertha?’

‘No. Agnes was the midwife back when I was young. She was the wise woman of the village, tended all the deliveries and laid out all the dead. If she ’ad been born a ’undred years earlier she would be called a witch. Her ’ouse is full of concoctions for this and that, and she’s not averse to casting the odd spell or two. However, give ’er her due, she was a good midwife. If I’d taken her advice my babies may ’ave survived and I might have ’ad a brood of my own.’  Janey sat down and Edna followed suit.

‘
What was her advice?’

‘
After my first miscarriage she told me to kill a bird and wrap it in cloth soaked in the blood from the afterbirth. She told me to ’ide it in the house. She said by offering the life of a small animal it would prevent further miscarriages in the ’ouse where it was buried. She said that all future babies born there would be ’ealthy and survive.’

‘
But you didn’t do it.’

The old woman shrugged,
‘At the time it sounded like a lot of mumbo jumbo. We had a big row and we never spoke again. I didn’t know I would have seven more babies to bury but by then I was too proud and grief stricken to make up with her. She still lives in the village but she ’asn’t delivered a baby for twenty years now. She got fed up with people knocking on ’er door at any time of the day and night. Bertha will be around. She will look after you. You need not worry on that score.’

The baby kicked inside her.

‘It’s kicking again, Edna.’ The old lady chuckled and reached over to feel the bump.

‘
You’ve got a strong baby in there. I don’t think you need to worry about the birth. This little one is fighting fit.’

‘Daniel won’t feel the baby’s movements,’ Janey said. She could hardly blame him but it concerned her none the less. The old woman had noticed but didn’t want to worry Janey.

‘
Men are funny sometimes. He will come around. When ’e sees the little one staring up at ’im ’e will be all over the baby. You just wait and see.’

Janey smiled weakly at Edna,

‘I hope so. I hope so very much.’ She said stroking her belly but Janey couldn’t help feeling a sense of foreboding about the month ahead.

Daniel felt the smack to his face before he was awake. Its suddenness wrenched him from his dreams and into reality with lightening speed. He sat up, rubbing his jaw and looked down at his wife as she slept beside him. He was not surprised to see it was not a peaceful sleep but one filled with terror as she struggled with her demons. She whimpered between bouts of fighting, flailing her arms as if it was for her very survival. The first time he had seen her like this he was at a loss what to do. He tried to hold her tight to provide comfort but it only made things worse. In the end he had woken her but it took a long time for her to settle and he feared he had made things worse. In the morning he had asked her what she had been dreaming about but she had become evasive and did not want to talk about it. She had asked if she had spoken and appeared relieved when he said he could make no sense of her mumbling. In the first few weeks of their marriage she had suffered these nightmares at least twice a week. They were occurring less often now but after the first he had resolved not to tell her. She had not wanted to share with him the contents of her dreams and if she remembered them she did not tell him. He no longer woke her or tried to hold her tight, he had learnt that stroking her hair and whispering her name seemed to sooth her and chase the nightmare away. He turned and propped himself up on his elbow and did just that, troubled to see the beaded perspiration upon her forehead, yet speaking softly to her in the night. He hated to see her this way and wish he could take her pain away. Although she had not shared the contents of her dreams he had his own ideas. He had seen her fight like this before. It had been when she had fought hard to be released from the arms that held her. He remembered how she looked in minute detail; he remembered the weather, the time and the place as clearly as if it had been yesterday. He could even remember her anguish cry. He closed his eyes shut, hating knowing who she was fighting in her dreams because when he had seen her fight like this before it had been on Helman Tor and the arms about her was his.

Janey leant against the gate of the meadow and took a deep breath. The air, as always, was fresh and clean and she inhaled it deep within her lungs, savouring it before letting it out once more. The sun shone down on the wild flowers that carpeted the little meadow and Janey watched in delight as butterflies fluttered haphazardly from flower to flower. She had felt restless all morning so when Daniel had told her that he would have to move the herd to eat the meadow grass she had taken the opportunity to go for a walk and drink in the sight of the flowers before they were eaten. Their destruction was part of farming life, but next year they would grow back stronger from the richly fertilized soil. David arrived and leaned on the gate beside her.

‘
I’m looking for Daniel, do you know where he is?’ he asked, Janey shook her head.