Red Dirt Diary 3 (18 page)

About two minutes later Mat finally understood what the new toilet arrangement was and said, ‘Ooooh gross!' Everyone else burst out laughing.

I'm writing this as I feed a kookaburra my bacon rind from breakfast. He's really cute. Every time I toss him a piece, he grabs it in his beak and whacks it on a rock as though he needs to kill it before eating it. Just like he did with Tom's frog.

10.35 am

We are waiting to head off on our big hike for the day. We would have left an hour ago except Ned and Sam got into a sticky situation.

Ned wanted to be prepared for anything at camp, including an earthquake. He had packed an apple, some tweezers and a tube of superglue. Don't know where he planned to pick up a yak …

Unfortunately, the tube of superglue burst when he pulled it out of his pack this morning. It went everywhere. His pack ended up stuck to his
chest and his hands got stuck to his sleeping bag when he tried to wipe them clean. Sam came to help and his hands got stuck to Ned's. They fell over and ended up with the apple and tweezers stuck to Sam's bum.

The Colonel and Mr Cluff were puzzling over what to do, when Matilda Jane the Mature sat down on a rock nearby and started removing her Bluebell Bliss nail polish. The Colonel shouted with joy. Apparently nail polish remover is perfect for dissolving superglue.

Mat said she couldn't
possibly
give them her nail polish remover. It was the only bottle she had with her. Mr Cluff explained that Ned and Sam couldn't possibly go hiking up Gumbledong Ridge glued to a sleeping bag, a backpack, an apple, a pair of tweezers and each other, and maybe — just maybe — she could live without perfect fingernails for one day.

Mat was horrified at the thought. While she was rolling her eyes and fanning her face, Mr Cluff snatched the nail polish remover from her hands.

The Colonel and Mr Cluff are dealing with Sam and Ned now.

Gabby is treating Mat for shock.

1.20 pm

Sitting on a rock in the middle of the thick bush, halfway around Gumbledong Ridge.

What a great morning. We just got into our walk when Cassie screamed, ‘Yowie!'

She was right. Below us in the trees we could see
three
yowies! The Colonel had been out first thing this morning and set up three giant yowie shapes made out of cardboard. He brought out the archery gear and we spent an hour shooting the yowies before they could scramble up the rocks to eat us for their breakfast.

How cool was that?! It was like being in the middle of an action movie.

We've just had Vegemite sandwiches and bananas for lunch and now we're nibbling on scroggin. Scroggin is this really yummy mix that the Colonel made up with dried fruit, nuts and bits of chocolate. It's meant to give you lots of energy for hiking.

3.10 pm

Disaster!

We're on our own.

Separated from the others.

Stranded.

It's all Mat's fault.

We were scrambling along a steep part of the ridge and everything was going just fine until Matilda Jane the Mature screamed. It sounded like her arm was being torn off by a wild haggis, but she'd just chipped her fingernail on the edge of a rock.

Her scream was so loud that it scared a herd of wild goats hiding in the bush. They bolted in fright, through the middle of us all, straight up the ridge, loosening bits of the cliff with their feet as they went.

At first, just a few rocks were tumbling down, but then more started to fall, then bigger rocks, until finally we could hear something rumbling like thunder above us.

Mr Cluff yelled, ‘Avalanche! Run!'

So we did.

I don't know how we got out of the way in time. All I can say is that scroggin must have some superpowered ingredients in it. I grabbed
Worms and just about carried him back the way we had come, leaping over rocks. I dragged Gabby behind me by the straps of her backpack. All I could hear was ear-splitting sounds as rocks smashed against each other and tumbled down the ridge. It went on and on, getting noisier and noisier, chasing us back along the ridge.

When I couldn't run another step, I dragged Gabby and Worms against a boulder and hugged them to me. I closed my eyes and waited for the thundering noise to stop.

When I opened my eyes again, all I could see were millions of rocks, trees snapped like toothpicks, and Gabby, Worms, Wes, Fez and Mat.

Of
all
the people I could have been stranded with today it had to include Wes, Fez and Matilda Jane the Mature.

What a disaster!

3.50 pm

We've yelled and screamed for half an hour but no-one has answered. They could be miles away on the other side of the rockslide.

At least I
hope
they're all on the other side.

Anything else is just too horrible to think about.

Wes and Fez reckon the Colonel knows how to survive anything. I hope they're right.

But what about us?

We can't go across the rockslide. It's far too unstable.

The Colonel told us that the best thing to do if you get lost is to wait where you are. Help will come.

So that's what we're doing.

Waiting.

4.15 pm

Still waiting.

Wes found a baby goat by the edge of the rockslide. Its leg is cut and it can't walk properly. It must have been separated from the herd and got swept down on the edge of the avalanche. Poor little thing.

Gabby is giving it first aid. It'll probably end up with its tail in a sling, its head bandaged and its tonsils removed!

Mat is sitting on a boulder, filing her fingernails.

Waiting.

4.50 pm

Still waiting.

It will be getting dark soon.

Mat said what if the others didn't make it past the rockslide? What if no-one is coming to help us? We can't wait forever.

She's right.

We
can't
wait forever.

8.10 pm

We're lost.

Totally lost.

In the middle of the bush.

In the dark.

Alone.

Exhausted.

We decided we had to find our own way back to camp. I knew it was south. I'm sure we followed the compass south, but we should be back by now if we walked in the right direction.

Worms has eaten three muesli bars, an apple and two chocolate frogs from his backpack. Kitty the kid has eaten Worms's apple core. I shared my block of chocolate with the others but it wasn't enough.

We're lost and hungry.

9.30 pm

We've stopped to set up camp for the night. That's what the Colonel would do.

Wes, Fez, Gabby and I gathered twigs, sticks and logs for a fire but the dew had already made everything wet. I used nearly all my matches trying to light it but it was just too damp.

Gabby is worried that Kitty the kid will get hypothermia. She's wrapped her from head to toe in bandages to keep out the cold.

I'm worried that the rest of us will get hypothermia.

9.50 pm

We're all wearing tea cosies. Except for Mat. She said it is too humiliating to be running around the bush looking like a teapot.

Wes's backpack was full of tea cosies and ropes. Mat said he should have packed something useful, like a blanket or a mobile phone. But I really don't think she can talk. Her pack is full of nail polish, lip gloss,
shampoo, conditioner, brushes, tweezers, eyelash curlers, four
Girl Alive
magazines, a novel called
Kisses Under the Rainbow
and a blow drier. Where on earth did she think she was going to plug in a blow drier? That girl can be such a twit!

Anyway, at least our heads are warm, even if the rest of our bodies are freezing.

10.30 pm

We have fire!

Worms ate the rest of the food in his pack — a bag of peanuts, another three muesli bars, two bags of chips and two bananas. He rifled through Gabby's backpack looking for more supplies, but it's just full of bandages and other first aid stuff.

Worms started to go into shock at the thought of spending all night without any food, so Gabby pulled a little jar of butter from her pocket and gave it to him. He was just about to scoff it down when I grabbed it.

Butter is fat and fat burns.

I tore the pages from
Kisses Under the Rainbow
, smeared them with butter and stuffed them at the bottom of our fire. I used my last two matches and the buttery paper caught alight. The twigs
crackled, the flames licked the sticks and a lovely, warming fire sprang to life. What a relief!

Mat is cheesed off about her book.

Worms is cheesed off about the butter.

At least we have fire for light and warmth.

Maybe in the morning we can use it to make smoke signals.

10.55 pm

The baby goat has just eaten one of Mat's
Girl Alive
magazines.

Mat is really cheesed off.

So is Worms. He had no idea you could eat
Girl Alive
, and is quite angry that Mat won't let him eat the other three magazines.

11.15 pm

Worms has just pulled Feathers out of his jumper!

He keeps looking from Feathers to the camp fire and back again, licking his lips. I think he's dreaming of roast pigeon.

11.30 pm

I'm dreaming of roast pigeon. We're all starving and getting colder by the minute, despite our big fire.

Mat is writing an SOS note to put in Feathers' little message capsule. If he flies home, our mums and dads will know that we're still alive and need rescuing.

11.45 pm

Feathers won't fly home. Every time we toss him up into the air he flaps about and lands back on Worms's shoulder. He just wants to get back down his jumper where it's nice and warm.

Can't say I blame him. It's FREEZING, even with the fire blazing.

Mat has finally given up and put the purple owl tea cosy with the goggly eyes on her head.

Midnight

We keep hearing dreadful growling noises. I think it's Worms's tummy rumbling but Gabby, Wes and Fez are convinced there are yowies lurking in the bush. They're digging a pit trap with the little toilet shovels so that if a yowie stomps through the bush towards the fire to eat us, it will fall down the pit and we'll be safe.