Ricochet (50 page)

was only when you got it right that you felt this

bad, and whether that was too high a price to pay.

Was there anyone on that set who didn't know how

he felt about Rick now - including Rick?

He heard a knock on the trailer door and then

it was pushed open. Heavy footsteps climbed the

steps and walked across to where he was sitting,

and then Rick sat down beside him.

"Hiding from the world?" he asked.

"Mainly just from you." Matt glanced at him

sideways with a little grimace. "Look, I'm sorry.

I'm an idiot. You've always been straight with me:

no strings, no reruns, no sappy little subs running

along behind you, hanging off your arm, wanting

your attention. I get it. You were doing me a favor

on Saturday night, helping me with this sex scene -

which, by the way, totally worked - and the last

thing you want is the sub you introduced to his own

sexuality to latch onto you and demand more, like a

love-struck puppy."

Rick frowned. "Do puppies even fall in

love?"

"Whatever. You know what I mean."

"Yeah, and you're nobody's idea of a sappy

little sub - I can't imagine you running along behind

anyone. Well, not without barking at them and

telling them what an idiot they are the whole time."

"Idiot." Matt glared at him.

"I rest my case."

They were silent for a long moment, and then

Rick stretched out his long legs in front of him and

cleared his throat.

"I didn't even meet my father until I was five,"

he said unexpectedly. Matt glanced at him in

surprise. "My mom was all I knew. We lived alone

in her little apartment, and we did everything

together. She was the most beautiful sub in the

world."

Rick paused, and Matt stayed silent, not

wanting to spook him out of wherever this story

was going.

"She had blonde hair and big green eyes, and

she sang to me and told me stories. She was the

best mom ever. I adored her, and she adored me.

At least, I thought she did."

He paused again, and Matt wondered what

could be coming next; this was obviously hard for

him.

"When I was five, she took me to this strange

house," Rick continued. "It smelled bad, and I

didn't like it. This big guy who looked just like me

answered the door. He looked down on her like

she was nothing and asked her what the hell she

was doing there. She said, 'I came here, so you

could meet your son' - and that was how I met my

dad for the first time." Rick stared into space for a

moment.

"They argued on the porch for a while, but I

was just a little kid, so I don't know what they

were arguing about, and then, finally, he let us in.

There were empty pizza boxes and beer cans all

over the place - it was a mess, nothing like the

cozy apartment I shared with my mom. Mom sat me

down in the corner with my favorite toy, while

they talked over on the other side of the room. I

don't know what they said, but there was some

shouting and arguing. A little while later Mom

came over to me, picked me up, held me tight and

kissed me. There were tears in her eyes, and I

brushed them away and told her not to cry. She

said it'd be okay, and that she was just going out

for a little while, and that I had to stay here with

my dad and be a good boy for him. That was the

last time I ever saw her."

Rick turned to look at Matty. "I sat and waited

by the window all evening for her to come back.

My dad barely spoke to me, and when he did it

was just to tell me to get out of the way of the TV.

Later he found me a blanket, and I slept all alone

on the couch. I woke up scared in the middle of the

night, crying for my mom, and went up to his

bedroom. He said to me, 'that fucking bitch has

gone and won't be coming back, so it's just you and

me now, kid, and I don't like whiners so shut the

fuck up.' He took me back to the living room, put

me back on the couch, and left me on my own in

the dark again."

"Rick - I'm so sorry." Matt put his hand over

Rick's. "This is terrible. I am so sorry you went

through that when you were just a little kid."

"Matty - ssh. I don't want your sympathy;

that's not why I'm telling you all this. It's so you

understand, at least a little, when I get to the bad

part."

"That wasn't the bad part?"

"No." Rick shook his head. "I waited by that

window every night for weeks, but she never came

back. She dumped me there, with this father I didn't

know, and left. Maybe I was too much for her, or

maybe she couldn't afford to keep me. I don't

know."

"Did you never try to find her?"

"No." Rick's expression hardened. "She left

me with my scumbag father, so she clearly didn't

want me. What would be the point of trying to find

her?"

"You could ask her why she left you."

"What possible answer could there be that

would stop it hurting?"

Matt thought he'd want to know all the same,

but he could hear the pain in Rick's voice, so he

just nodded.

"At first, my dad resented me," Rick

continued. "But one day we were in the park, and I

was playing while he read the newspaper, and I

fell over. This guy came over and helped me up,

and took me back to my dad who hadn't even

noticed. I'd scraped my knee, and this guy was so

good to me, and he and my dad got chatting. He

was called Marcus, and he was a wealthy, single

sub - just how my dad likes them."

"Oh. Shit." Now Matt had an idea of where

this was going.

"Yeah." Rick rubbed his jaw absently. "Once

my dad saw how useful it was to have a cute kid

around, he took more of interest in me. He coached

me in how to behave around Marcus - how to suck

up to him, and sweet-talk him, and generally be

ultra cute and adorable. Before too long, my dad

and me had moved in to Marcus's fancy apartment.

I liked Marcus, and I didn't like telling him the lies

my father made me tell him, but I did it anyway

because my dad was all I had, and I didn't know

any better."

"You were just a little kid," Matt said softly.

"Yeah, but I also liked how it felt when Dad

was being nice to me - and if I did what he said,

then he could be pretty damn nice. My dad can turn

nice on and off like a faucet." Rick made a face.

"What happened to Marcus?"

"He fell for my dad, of course - they say

everyone has a talent in life, and Dad is a maestro

at finding a way into a sub's head, learning what

they like, and then playing them like a musical

instrument; poor sweet Marcus didn't stand a

chance with my dad and me both playing him."

Rick gave a bitter little smile. "Dad lived off him

for a few years, going through his money like

water. Dad didn't work - he pretended he had a

bad back and that he wanted to be around for me

when I got home from school, which was bullshit

because he ignored me unless Marcus was around

to see us together. When the money started running

out, I heard Dad and Marcus having these big

arguments, and then Dad woke me up one night,

and we did a moonlight flit. Dad piled up his car

with all this stuff from Marcus's apartment, and we

drove off with it."

"Did you ever see Marcus again?"

"Nope." Rick shook his head. "To be honest,

he was well shot of us, but I missed him. He'd

been good to me, and he showed a hell of a lot

more interest in me than my father did. From then

on, Dad used me to get close to his marks. His

specialty was grieving subs. He'd go through the

obituaries in the papers, choose a mark, and find

out all about them before making his move. He

used me to smarm his way in, and then he'd pour

out this big sob story about my mom being his soul

mate, and how she'd died as we both held her in

our arms, and how he longed to find a sub he could

love again who could be a second parent to me. As

these subs had just lost someone they loved too

they fell for it, easy as anything."

Matt suddenly understood that Rick had led

such an entirely chaotic childhood that it was

hardly surprising he embraced chaos so much as an

adult; it was all he knew.

"And I used to help him," Rick continued.

"Let me be clear about this, Matt. I don't want you

pitying me, or thinking I was a poor, innocent little

victim in all this. I learned how to be a devious

little shit, and I learned quickly. Dad taught me that

you always look good when seducing a sub, so you

dress well. You impress them with things like fine

wines, fancy restaurants, and a delicious home-

cooked meal. You watch them closely, so you can

figure out who they are; you listen to the small

details they let slip and then repeat them back to

them. "

Rick leaned forward and brushed some hair

away from Matt’s face."Oh, did I ever tell you I

was temple born? Wait - you are too? No! That's

such a coincidence." Rick smiled at him tenderly.

"I was doing my yoga practice yesterday when…

what's that? You do yoga too? Wow. We have so

much in common!"

Rick looked into his eyes with an expression

of rapt sincerity, and Matt felt himself being drawn

in. Rick rolled his eyes and tapped Matt's head

with his finger. "You find a way into their head,

and then you start playing around in there, so they

think they can't live without you."

"Rick, it might be what you learned, but it's

not who you are."

"You don't know who I am, Matty," Rick

retorted. "You don't have a fucking clue. We

chewed up subs and spat them out, me and Dad,

and I learned the family trade well. I loved

Marcus, and I loved the next one, Anna, but

gradually I stopped caring about the succession of

subs we conned. Dad told me they were just marks

who deserved to be fleeced. They were all so nice

to me, so kind and sweet - they had no idea what a

little shit I was, or how much I was playing them. I

guess that's partly why Dad picked them - they

were precisely the kind of innocent, gentle souls

who'd be taken in by a pair of con artists like us.

They were all lovely, and we stole the life savings

from every single one of them."

"Damn it, Rick," Matt growled. "If I met your

father, I'd -"

"Probably fall in love with him," Rick

supplied wryly. "Everyone thinks they're immune,

but when he turns on the charm, they melt."

"Not me! I'd yell at him."

"Yeah, you probably would, knowing you."

Rick grinned. "At first anyway." His grin faded.

"Was that the bad part? It seems pretty bad."

"No, I'm getting to the bad part now." Rick

had a look of grim determination on his face as he

continued. "Just before my sixteenth birthday, Dad

was between scams, and we were living in some

rundown old place because when Dad has money

he spends it, or bets it away, so we never had any

savings. I was too old to be cute anymore, so I

wasn't much use helping him sweet-talk our way

into a new sub's life. That pissed him off, and he

told me I had to start paying my own way."

Rick glanced at Matt. "Now, see, I could have

gotten a regular job, but nobody wanted to employ

me - and I don't blame them. By this point I had an

attitude problem, a couple of shoplifting

convictions, and my school grades were non-

existent. I was a surly pain in the ass, and Dad said

it was time I learned to live off someone else,

instead of him." Rick stared into space, and Matt

got the feeling they were very close to the bad part

now.

"There was this cute sub I'd become friendly

with - one of the baristas at the local coffee shop,

and the more time I spent with her, the more I liked

her. She was a couple of years older than me, and

she didn't earn a lot at the coffee shop. Dad told